Harley woke up feeling cold. Still half asleep she searched the bed for her Puddin'; desperate for him to keep her warm. When she finally realized that she was alone in the bed she shot a glance at the bedside clock, it was only four in the morning. The small shock woke her up completely and she sat up straight, switching on the light and scanning the room for any trace of his disappearance.

The bathroom door was slightly ajar but there were no light coming from the room. In her tired state she tried and failed to come with a logic answer to where he could be. She decided to get out of bed and draped her red silk robe with black lace trimming around her otherwise naked body, and headed downstairs. She saw light coming from the kitchen and followed the dark hallway down towards it, to her surprise and further confusion, she found it empty. At a closer look she could tell someone, and she had a pretty good guess at exactly who, had tried to make coffee but the spilt black muddle and the unfinished cup on the counter told her that they'd failed miserably. Harley paused for a moment and smiled to herself at her Puddins inability to do anything even remotely close to housework. She turned out of the kitchen, ran up the hallway. Stood at the bottom of the staircase she called out for him.

"Puddin'!" she shouted… no response "Mistah J!" she tried Jokers preferable nickname… still no answer. "Joker!"

"No need to yell I'm right here" she turned around instantly and almost crashed against Joker standing in the open doorway holding a blue and silver coloured can.

"Puddin' where've have you been?" Harley asked as she threw her arms around his neck, reaching for his height on her tiptoes.

"At a meeting" he cut short, patting her hair down.

"You know it's four in the morning right? Who the heck plans for a meeting at this hour? " She asked.

"It was rather urgent" he responded.

"Urgent huh? Who was it and what was it for" she asked.

"No one and nothing you have to worry your pretty little head about" he said as he kissed the top of her head and moved away towards the kitchen.

He drowned the last of his energy drink and threw it to the bin.

"Nasty ways of energy those fuckers, thank god for coffee" he said.

"Would you like me to make you a cup?" Harley asked. She felt relieved that he was back home in one piece, and ready to cater to his every need.

"A cup!? Pumpkin I need an entire pot" he said clearly offended.

"One pot coming up" she said on a yawn, suddenly feeling her lack of sleep creeping up on her. She knew better than to complain, her Puddin' had gotten less sleep than her and he had been out securing a living for them both as well. Her mind wandered to Jokers business and the anxiety picked up a fight against her sleepiness. Joker leaned back against the counter as Harley stood in silence pondering over her worries regarding Jokers business work, having the purring sound of the coffee percolating filling the silence.

"Nice robe" joker commented out of nowhere.

"Thanks" Harley hesitated wondering why the sudden compliment. "I've had it for years" she continued, not helping feeling a bit angered for him to notice it first now… did he really pay her that little attention she wondered.

As if reading her mind he answered: "Well to be fair, I pay a lot more attention to what's underneath than the actual thing covering" Joker said with a wink.

Harley tried to look offended but failed, trying in vain to cover her grin against her elbow.

"Harley... are you blushing?" Joker asked teasingly.

Harley just shook her head as she watched him step forward and fill the previous space between them. She reached up and started to play with his collar, biting her lips as she focused on unbuttoning the first few. The Joker looked down at her with a mischievous grin on his face, she noticed and just as she was about to say something he smashed his moth against her; stealing her breath and words. He drew his tongue along her bottom lip, coaxing her to open up and letting him in. Their tongues fought in heat and Harley whimpered as Jokers cold hands stroked up her thighs, a reluctant shiver went up his spine as he felt the lace trimming against his knuckles. He reached up and caressed her buttocks, groaning deeply into their heated kiss and gave her perky butt a good squeeze with his big palms. Harley moaned at his actions and began rubbing her thighs together, trying to soothe the ache that had begun to beat inside of her.

Breaking the kiss he lifted her up on the counter and wasted no time attacking her bared throat, she tilted her head to give him better access as she steadied herself by grabbing a hold of his green strands. The cold marble was a shock for her heated skin at first but she got over it and spread her legs wide for him, exposing herself and her arousal.

"Mistah J…" she panted, squeezing her eyes shut as his cold hand reached between her legs.

"Want me to stop?" Joker mocked, tracing a finger between her wet folds.

"No no no no" she panted desperately.

He stroked his thumb over her sensitive bundle of nerves causing her to jolt, Joker laughed a throaty laugh at her desperate state… not completely ignoring his own. He slowly entered a finger inside of her, twisting it and coaxing Harley to buck against his hand.

"Always so wet for… and only for me" he mused as he, with his free hand, pulled at the sash causing her robe to fall open and exposing her naked flesh, watching her goose bumps rising from the sudden lack of warmth. That creamy, white… perfect skin –Joker thought in his head as he pulled out of her to knead her breast with both hands. Harley whimpered at the loss of him inside her and was just about to rip him clean of his pants and underwear as they heard a sound and the kitchen door flung open.

Harley screamed and hid herself in Jokers chest whilst he flung his arms around her body, pushing her up against him and trying to hide what was only for his eyes.

"Oh shit! Sorry sir, boss" Rocco, Jokers one and only right hand –the golden henchman, stammered at the sight before him. He had tried to stay away from the thought of the Boss and Harley actually doing it, to be honest the thought of them getting busy actually scared him, but every now and then he walked in on a reminder.

"'Fuck you doing here?" Joker asked, angered and frustrated.

"I always come around at this hour on Sundays" Rocco said, covering his eyes with his hands as Harley fumbled with her robe.

Joker growled out to thin air and began muttering death treats as he buttoned his shirt back up. The appearance of Rocco reminded him of the news he had gotten last day and his thoughts was instantly brought back to work.

"Harley, go away, I need a word in private with Rocco here" he shot him a look and Rocco felt the shivers running down his spine.

"But Puddin'" she whined.

"Don't Puddin me, go take a cold shower or something I don't care" Joker said with authority.

She jumped down the counter with a look of utter disappointment on her face, as she passed by Rocco she couldn't help but to bump into his shoulder and discreetly giving him the finger behind his back. She knew J was just as affected by their moment as she was, and it sure made her feel better to think that he probably was dealing with his own discomfort right now… and he couldn't go take a cold shower to remedy it.

As she skipped up the stairs she imagined finding Rocco beaten blue and yellow after his talk with her Puddin'… her vicious, merciless, strong, and handsome Mistah J… oh no these thoughts sure didn't help with her situation, she shook her blonde curls violently trying to rid herself of the scenes appearing in her head.

Back in the kitchen Joker shifted his pants and showed his hands down the front pockets to disguise his prominent bulge. Rocco had a look of pure horror on his face, since working with the Boss for soon decades he knew the ruthless behaviour of Joker first hand and he would do anything to avoid it.

"Look, let's just forget about what just happened, I'm not particularly happy with you just marching in as you please but I have more important matters to get to" Joker said. Words couldn't describe the revelation Rocco felt after those words, he silently thanked the lord for his mercy as his thoughts diverted to whatever could be more important than his slipup.

Meanwhile her Puddin' was tending to work Harley did herself up and got ready to face the day. She hopped down the stairs and found the rest of J's henchmen hanging out in the lounging area, in lack of better ways to spend her time she decided to join them. Even though the men didn't have much substance to bring to a conversation, Harley still found them entertaining to be around. Their lack of book-smartness resulted in stupidly funny jokes and a certain realness to their unpolished humour.

A while later Joker decided to head downstairs to check up on his men, making sure that none of the dumbasses had set the place on fire or demolished it in any other way. As he entered the lounge he saw his petite Harley girl, one of his most prized possessions, amongst a heap of dirty, dumb and desperate men; in his mind it looked like an opening scene to a low-budget gangbang porno.

"Harley, get your fat ass over here immediately" Joker said sternly, loud enough to be heard above the loud noise of the henchmen.

Harley shot an excusing look at the men she was talking to, they sure would understand that when the Joker called -you responded.

"What's up Puddin'?" she asked.

"What do you think you're doing?" he asked, clearly irritated.

"Uhm, just hanging out with the guys" Harley answered.

"And why, pleaseee tell me why, are you frolicking around with MY men?! Don't you have better things to do?" he asked, now becoming hysterical.

"Frolicking? Ha!" she laughed at that "I was just socializing, you know since you never have time to. I can't go around becoming more insane than I already am… I'm still human –I still need to interact and actually do stuff. I don't have work to do and I can't go out, what am I supposed to do, just stand staring into a wall all day huh?"

"No but I'm sure there's a ton of housework for you to do, make yourself useful somehow since I'm working today –making sure we have this roof over our heads and food on the table" he retorted.

"I DO! In case you haven't noticed I do all the housework around here, but I do it every single day and there just isn't enough to keep me occupied for twelve hours a day" she tried to explain.

"Well those men out there" he pointed towards the door separating them and the henchmen "are bad men, and I don't want you to spend more time than necessary with them".

"Well you are a very, very, bad man and you still let me spend time with you." Harley changed tactics and decided to make use of her womanly charm, reaching out and stroking his arm as she spoke in a soft voice.

"I am quite bad" he mused to himself, "but I'm the only bad man for you" he stated, tilting her head up by the chin; gazing lustfully into her eyes.

"The one and only" she whispered, reaching up on her toes to gain height against his tall form. Soon their lips locked and Harley sighed contently against his. Joker broke the kiss and stepped back, not wanting things to get too heated and out of hand.

"I got a mission for you Harley" he said, breaking the heat between them. "Why don't you head down the shops and get me something to snack on? You know I need me some sugar to keep the energy flowing" he said enthusiastic.

"Sure thing Mistah J" she sighed and gave him a peck on the cheek before reluctantly heading for the door. Turning around she caught him rubbing at the red lip stain on his cheek where she had kissed him, when he looked blamingly at her she just gave him a cheeky smirk and turned on her heels.

Normally it wasn't safe for her to go out during day time but the area in which they lived was mainly occupied by other criminals and it had become sort of a "no go" zone for most people. A couple blocks down laid a simple supermarket, Harley and Joker had, quickly after their move in, become recognized by the owner and in return for mercy and protection he served them free of charge. Harley picked up the most colourful doughnuts and the softest chocolate chip cookies she could find and made her way back up to their residence. As she entered the building she quickly realised that The Joker had gone back to his study. She placed the goods on a kitchen plate and went up to serve him.

"That's a beautiful sight right there" Joker thought out loud.

Harley giggled and placed the plate down on the desk in front of him.

"This is a lot" Joker said looking down at the gigantic pile of pastry.

"Well I thought we could share" Harley suggested.

"I don't know Harley, I don't want you to be getting fat on me" Joker said.

Harley knew he didn't mean it like that, deep down she knew she was borderline too skinny but she couldn't help the words getting to her. Pushing those nasty thoughts away she picked up a doughnut covered in a thick layer of pink frosting. Biting down she winked at back at Joker.

"Can't we just grow fat together Puddin'?" She suggested jokingly in between bites. He answered with a huff and continued with his scribbling as he dug into one of the cookies.

As Joker kept on tinkering with his work Harley slouched on the sofa at the back of his office, scrolling through the various apps on her phone. She looked up from the device when she noticed a tall figure hovering over her.

"Get up" Joker stated firmly. She rose from her laying position and sat up on the couch. "Get up!" he repeated himself, this time louder. She flew up from the sheer tone of his voice and confusedly asked why the sudden order.

"I have a meeting and you need to get out" he told her as if she was supposed to know. By this time she had become used to his mode swings and weird behaviour so she just accepted it and headed for the door.

"And bring this with you" Harley turned around just in time to watch Joker throw a plate in her way, she thanked gymnastics for her good reflexes as she ducked just in time for the plate to smash against the wall behind her.

"Was that really necessary?!" She asked not thinking about holding back her anger. She quickly realised her mistake as she watched Joker walking towards her, anger oozing from his every pore.

"Did no one ever teach you how to speak to authorities?" he asked as he reached for her neck.

"I'm sorry, I'm so, so, sorry" her voice quivered with fear but she couldn't help the underlying current of excitement that stiffened her nerves in anticipation. He wrapped his big, right hand, fully around her neck and squeezed; not hard enough to cut out her air supply but still threatening. Tears spilled unwillingly out from her eyes and Joker watched as they travelled down her cheeks. He shook his head from side to side.

"My little Harley, always making a mountain of a molehill" he laughed as he whipped her cheeks clean from tears.

She knew that she wasn't the one who overreacted in this situation but she let it slide, not wanting to cause his mood to take a turn for the worse.

"Yeah, you know silly me" she tried to sound apologising as she made her way for the door.

"Harley, you're not forgetting something?" his voice sent chills up her spine and she froze in place. As she turned she saw him looking down at the shards.

"Oh" she realised that he probably wanted her to clean it up, so she did. The plate had, fortunately, been made of thick ceramic and thus didn't splitter into many pieces, the cuts were few and not too bad. A thorough rinse with soap and water, and some basic band aids were all it took to mender her hands.

Later that night she fell asleep in the arms of the king of mood swings himself, just as if nothing had happened. Some days she just had to be grateful that he hadn't kicked her out on the streets or sold her of to some well-paying drug lord.