So the time has come for the Christmas special, or rather the Christmas chapter. I want to apologize for the late arrival of this chapter. I've had a few rough months and I stupidly all but ignored school during that time, and well now I'm knee deep in s*it. It's boring so I wont go into details, but I have a lot to catch up on. My own fault. But I wanted you to know. I'm working hard so hopefully everything will be normal soon. Also finally managed to find the usb containing this story, I hope you like it.

As usual, I don't own Four Brothers.

"About Christmas..."

Camille lifted her eyes from where they had been glaring a hole through the table. She felt bad aboutMuriel's accusations, she really did. She understood where she was coming from, but like Jack had said, Evan was hardly an innocent victim here, if Muriel refused to admit it. She felt a bit guilty, inviting them in when she knew what was waiting for them in the kitchen. She was just so, angry. All the time now. When had she ever been angry like this? Would she ever stop? It really didn't feel like it now. "You want the girls?" She asked flatly. Of course he did. Despite his background, his out of control brothers, and the mess their lives were she could always count on Jerry wanting to see his dauughters. Lately she had been thinking it would have been better if he didn't.

Jerry nodded, and she could see how nervous he was about asking, the glance in his eyes that told her how sure he was of her answer, and for a moment she was tempted to let him have it, let him know that there was no way he was gonna get the luxuary of seeing his kids on Christmas, not when he so clearly had no wish to see her, at all. She wanted him to hurt like she was hurting, to feel abandoned and unimportant, everything she felt, even though she was the one who left him. No, no, that wasn't right. He'd left her a long time ago. Right about the time when his brothers rolled back into town. Just like she always knew he would. Staring at him now she felt confused. He looked the same as he always had, they way he held his hat in his hands was so familiar, he was the same, yet not... different, but still the same. Hadn't she loved him once? When the tears came she got up quickly and busied herself with the dishes to hide them. She couldn't let them see her cry, she couldn't bear it. When the words came they surprised everyone, even her.

"Three hours during the day. We're leaving for my parents at three". The relieved sigh hurt, and her hand clenched around the cup in her hand. She wanted to take the words back. Tell him that their girls, her girls, had no business in his life such as it was. Tell him that he couldn't have it all. But the words wouldn't come.

"Thank you" He hesitated "Camille..."

"Just leave". She couldn't take anymore today, not now, not while she was still so weak. The slam of the door told her that she was now alone, and the hand that had been holding the cup so hard let go, and it fell into the sink with a startling clatter that she didn't notice, the hand instead pressing against her heart, the part of her that felt so out of place.

...

"Ho ho ho"

Bobby looked up from his bed and sure enough there he was, not Santa, or even an elf, but his youngest brother, an oddly cheerful smile on his face.

"You alright there fairy? It's almost like..." his eyes widened dramatically and he slapped a hand over his mouth in mock horror. "don't tell me... you came downstairs during the night while I was asleep, found Santa underneath the tree, discovered that no, there was no dildo in a neat package there for you, and to get revenge you stripped him down and tied him to your bed wearing nothing but the hat and boots... am I right?"

"You're a sick bastard" Jack frowned at him.

"Tell me something I don't know. You making breakfast or what?"

"Don't I always?"

"That's the spirit!"

Jack trudged into the kitchen and smiling with the devil dancing in his eyes he turned on the radio, jingle bells playing, and was rewarded with a curse from his brother. He stifled a laugh as he started making coffee. Little brothers knew stuff too, mostly how to get on the oldest nerves.

Sofi sweeped in, for once fully dressed in her own clothes instead of Angel's and pecked Jack on the cheek, frowning when he flinched.

"Merry Christmas Jack" The frown went away and was replaced by a smile which he returned, albeit a bit more subdued.

"Uh, same to you. Merry Christmas Sofi. Want some breakfast?"

"I can't stay, I'm celebrating with my family, but I'll be back later tonight, and with a present for you" Another wide smile.

"It better not be a sister" Bobby grumbled while entering the kitchen and taking a seat.

A curse in spanish, and something whipping around their heads and then she was gone. Jack figured that some magic had to have had a hand in that.

"Please God, coffee" Bobby moaned, dragging a hand over his eyes.

Jack placed a cup of the steaming liquid in front of him and raised an eyebrow. "You could just call me Jack".

"Smartass" Bobby's eyes followed his brother as he moved around the kitchen with ease. "So... you seem happy?"

Jack stopped for a second before he continued. He could feel his brothers eyes on him but he didn't turn around, choosing to keep his back to him. "I am. It's... a good day to be, alive". He sounded as if he was testing that last word, just trying it out on his tongue to see how he felt about it.

Bobby nodded, his eyes solemn. "It is". It really was. He might seem ungrateful but he wasn't. He knew how much it was worth to be here, that they were all here. Except they weren't. Like Jack could read his mind he stopped in the midst of cracking an egg.

"I miss her"

They always would. It would always hurt, no matter how far they came, no matter how good they got. Evelyn was gone and she was never coming back. That would never stop hurting. "I do too. She always loved Christmas".

...

Are you sure this is right?" Bobby held the brightly colored something in his hand and frowned. It seemed to fragile to be anywhere but in the box. His assessment proved to be correct 5 minutes later when it lay broken on the floor. Angel was cursing, since he was the one who dropped it, Jerry was sighing because he was the one who was cleaning it up, and Bobby didn't care cause he was watching Jack watch the Christmas tree.

He was fascinated by the look of wonder on the kid's face and he wondered if he'd ever looked the same. If he'd ever stared at something with that level of amazement and wonder. He didn't think so, at least he couldn't remember it. How could it be that when he thought back to those days, the days before Evelyn, he could only remember the bad. There had to have been some kind of hope right? Something that made sense...

He remembered one Christmas, the one before Evelyn came in to his life. He'd been in a group home, and they'd had a tree, a pretty shitty one but the younger kids were all wrapped up in it, gushing about the colors and the tinsel and all that fucking crap that he was too tough, and too hardened to give a shit about. He'd been sitting silent on the ratty old couch, pissed cause someone had decided that he liked matches to much to get to keep them during the holidays, since they reckoned that the fire department had enough to worry about without him. He wasn't worried though, there was always ways, even if they weren't allowed to leave right now. He'd get them some other way. It wasn't like he was planning on starting a fire, it was the way they treated him. Like they knew better, like he couldn't be trusted with the simplest things. And so he sat alone, staring at tree who'd seen better days.

...

"Looks great Jack" Jerry smiled as he took a seat. He'd been on some kind of high all morning, anxiously waiting for his girls to come.

Angel had come downstairs a few minutes after Sofi had left, whistling some jaunty tune that threatened to kill even Jack's holiday spirit. Appaerently he'd already given Sofi her present, which she had loved, and thus making him late for breakfast. Bobby had pretended to gag, while Jerry just shook his head.

They'd decorated the tree the night before and Jack was pretty proud of it, mostly the star at the top, since he was the one who'd placed it there, shooting Bobby a teasing grin afterwards. It was kind of funny how Bobby was the shortest of them, but no one almost never noticed. He had enough charisma and general bad ass-ness to strike a room into silence just by being there. They hadn't really talked about presents, since they all figured that they didn't need them, but they had found their way underneath the tree still. It was nice, they didn't need gifts, but the traditions made it seem like everything was still the same, like everything hadn't changed.

At noon a knock was heard and Jerry who'd been waiting all but threw open the door.

"Daddy!"

In the midst of hugging and kissing his girls, and listening to them talk about the gifts they'd gotten already, he couldn't help but notice how tired Camille looked. He wanted to talk, to let her know that he was there, but how could he? When she'd made it so clear that she didn't wish him to be, and a few tense moments later she left without saying hello to anyone else. Jerry followed his girls, who headed straight to the tree, happily chattering the whole way and to his amusement, and Bobby's horror, they threw themselves at him where he sat on the couch.

"Uncle Bobby! Mom said you were in the hospital, are you okay? Did you get a cold?" They rattled of questions faster than he could answer.

Bobby chuckled and reached out to ruffle Amelia's hair. "Yeah something like that. You girl's have a good day so far?"

The girls started rattling off everything they'd gotten while Bobby smiled and nodded when it seemed like they wanted a response. For the next few hours the brothers ate candy, exchanged gifts with the girls and listened to them talk about all things possible. Bobby looked over at Jerry, who was sitting on the couch in between his girls, a happy smile on his face. It was clear he was in heaven. Bobby didn't know why Camille continued to be such a bitch about Jerry seeing his kids, but he figured it had something to do with all of them. Sure their lives had been far from child friendly lately, but any idiot could see how much Jer loved his kids.

When the doorbell rang Jerry's smile slipped a little before he quickly rearranged it and turned to the girls. "That's probabably mommy".

"You coming with daddy?"

Bobby didn't stick around to hear Jerry's explanation for not coming with them, choosing instead to answer the door, but someone had the same thought. He tried to not leap across the hall when Jack pulled the door open, one hand holding a cup of coffee.

"Camille" he heard Jack greet Jerry's ex? Wife? He tried to ignore the part of his heart sighing in relief.

"Are the girls ready?" Camille's crisp voice cut through the air, making it seem a little less friendly than it had been moments ago. Bobby wanted to walk over and give her a piece of his mind, but some part of him, a very small part, tried to be understanding, and crowding her in the doorway probably wouldn't help Jerry's case.

"Soon" Jack answered, an edge to his voice that made Bobby frown. Since when did he have that attitude when dealing with Camille. There must have been more to the meet than they'd told him. It was silent for a few seconds and Bobby leaned against the wall, listening.

"Don't look at me like that" Jack didn't answer. "I always liked you Jack, but not now. You've changed, and not for the better".

"Yeah well, it's not everyday you see your brother gunned down in front of you. It changes things". That clipped tone did definitely not use to be there. "Maybe it's better if you wait outside Camille" Jack continued. "Wouldn't want you to get dirt on those high horses".

Bobby blinked. What was this? Not even he himself would have said that, even if he sure had been thinking it. He straigtened up and and saw that Jerry and the girls had collected their things and were making their way over. Time to smooth things over. He came to a stop next to Jack. "Hi Camille".

"Bobby"

"Mom! Look what we got!"

"Very nice honey, we better get going"

The goodbye was a lot less painful than expected after Jack promised the girls they'd get to play his guitar the next time they came by. Bobby made a mental note to be absent during that time. One rockstar in the family was more than enough.

…

Bobby watched as his youngest brother took the turkey out and cut it silently. He'd been quiet since Camille and the girls had left and Bobby didn't like it, but when dealing with Jack one had to thread carefully. "What's going on with you and Camille?" So much for subtle.

Jack laughed loudly and threw him a glance over his shoulder. "Are you serious?" He laughed again while getting a few bottles of beer from the fridge.

Bobby sighed. "You know what I meant"

"Yes Bobby I know" Jack imitated him mockingly.

"Hey, watch it, I can still kick your ass into next week"

"Sure grandpa" Jack smiled before sobering up. "Can we just... enjoy christmas?"

Bobby wanted nothing more. Everything wasn't fine, but he too wanted to pretend for just today, and hope that maybe it could be.

…

Dinner was loud, and full of memories. They tried not to think about the fact that someone was missing, and that two of them might not have been here if things had gone was slightly drunk and grumbling about how Sofi still hadn't showed up, while Bobby snickered and whispered to Jack that he'd disabled the doorbell and locked the door, making Jack choke on his beer, Jerry laugh and shake his head.

"That won't stop her" Jack grinned.

"I know, but it'll delay her, and my misery" Bobby responded.

No sooner had he spoken before a loud banging was heard from the front door. "ANGEL! Open this door!"

The Angel in question got up and walked over to the door and opening it. "Hey who locked the door?"

"Just for everyone's safety" Bobby shouted back.

"Didn't you hear the bell? I've been standing here freezing for the last 5 minutes Angel"

"Why didn't you just go home then?" Bobby asked, but sighed when she only smiled in response. Seems like even Sofi could be affected by the holiday spirit. "Take a seat Loca, it's a little too sane without you anyway".

"I wouldn't call it sane" Jack laughed.

"Yeah well, it's home anyway" Bobby grinned.

Christmas was supposed to be longer, and I dunno, funnier and better, but my head wasn't ine the game as you all know, so I'm leaving it and moving on with guys to other stuff. Hope you liked this chapter anyway!