Music tip:
Elin Bergman – Gasoline Dream
youtube: watch?v=885F7jCfsB8

Lovers of Freedom

Chapter 21:
No Deference

"Mitch, you should really get up now, it's already past 2. I thought you wanted to record with us later."

His head was pounding painfully, as he slowly raised his head out of his big pillow. The bright sunlight was making him squint his eyes and with a moan he let himself fall onto his cozy bed again.
"Yes I do, just returned at 6 though. Give me a few minutes," he answered Jason with a raspy voice and closed his eyes again. Contrary to his assumption though his companion didn't leave him alone and instead knelt down at the side of his bed. With a clearing of his throat he continued their little conversation, even though Mitch must have looked anything but motivated.

"You were completely wasted when you returned, weren't you?"

"…kinda. Sorry if I woke you up," he muttered and didn't bother to keep his sleepy eyes open during his half-hearted reply. Jason though didn't seem to mind and laughed, "Not me but Quentin actually. He was quite mad at you."
"Then I have to apologize to him later. You finished now?" Mitch sighed and felt sorry for being rude, but his head was pounding way too much for him to really care about it at the moment.

"Not quite yet. What is wrong, Mitch?"

And all of a sudden his eyes were wide open out of surprise. How could he possibly know? Did Jerome tell him? Had Jason heard them talking about it? Thankfully he didn't notice Mitch's panic and continued with a too serious tone in his voice that didn't want to fit him.

"We all like a party once in a while, but you never were the kind of person to behave like… this. You're way too reasonable for that and I can't get my head around what changed you so drastically."

It was silent for a second, then Mitch found his voice again and tried to reply as steady as possible, "People change over time, Jason."

"Not like this though, Mitch. At first we were quite happy that you had stopped being so gloomy and withdrawn all of the time, but this is not how me met you back then either."
And suddenly they were wading into a state of mind that Mitch had desperately tried to leave behind all those months ago. Jason wasn't going to talk to him about Murphy and Mitch's current problems at all.

"Things happened, you can't expect me to stay the same after that."
Both knew what he was hinting at, but apparently Jason wasn't willing to talk about it directly either, so they carefully danced around the precarious topic. Naming it wasn't necessary.
"I know, but so much time has passed. Don't you think we should just try to move on? I mean, even Adam forgave you, so it would be only fair of you to forgive him for-"

"It's not that," Mitch interrupted him and buried his face in his pillow to escape the worried and pitiful glance of his friend. "I forgave him long ago and I've tried so hard to move on for so long, Jason, but-"
He stopped himself and fell silent.

"You know that you have to forgive yourself as well, right?"

"How am I supposed to do that? I messed everything up back then and-"
Mitch fell silent and glanced up at a barely smiling Jason, who looked way to calm after his unintentional statement.
"Don't think you are the only one who blamed himself, Mitch. Every day I thought about what I could have done different to prevent our group from falling apart, but our whole cooperation was so poisoned at this point that a break-up was necessary to prevent an even worse outcome. At least that was what I kept telling myself, after I had realized that we weren't getting back together."

"…and that worked?" he asked skeptically and managed to grin as Jason laughed out loud.

"Mitch, we are all responsible for what happened back then. Adam, you, Jerome, I…"

"But you didn't do anything," he argued and slowly raised himself from his cave made out of his thick blanket.
"Exactly Mitch, I didn't do anything to prevent the fight and what happened in the first place to cause it."

He stayed quiet and stared aimlessly out of the bright window, thinking about Jason's words. Maybe he was right after all. How much good could it do to get himself down over and over again about something that the other's had left behind long ago?
If he really wanted to sort this mess with Murphy out and get the team back together for good, then maybe he should start at the very beginning.

Forgiving Adam? Done.
Forgiving himself?

"It's not as hard as you might think, Mitch," Jason interrupted his thoughts as if he had read his mind and stood near the open door. "Opening up once in a while doesn't hurt."
Then he left a confused Mitch alone with his thoughts and a pounding headache.

Half an hour later he dragged his still exhausted body into the kitchen of their LA house, where Jerome was already waiting for him. For a minute he watched Mitch's struggle to get himself a cup of coffee and to decide whether he should sit down or go to the bathroom to get rid of the rest alcohol messing up his body. When he finally sat down at the kitchen table, Jerome sighed and put the local newspaper in front of him without commenting on it.

After a minute of Mitch reading the article on one of the last pages, he laid the paper back onto the table and grinned at his silent friend. "It's working perfectly so far."

"Are you really sure about that?" Jerome pressed him with a skeptical look on his face and then continued, "Have you actually read the article? They nearly called you a whore, Mitch."

"Exactly. I bet Murphy is throwing a fit right now," he grinned and sipped on his coffee, glad about the calming conversation he had had with Jason, while Jerome sighed loudly and came a bit closer to talk to him in a quieter voice. "And you're actually enjoying it? Seriously?"

"Of course I don't," he muttered into his cup and took another sip, when the headache flared up again. "But it's the only chance to end this disaster, Jerome. And don't you dare telling me it isn't, because you actually haven't come up with something better yet."

"I know, but it shouldn't be the only way. Also we don't know how he will react, I fear that your plan is going to backfire," he tossed in and mustered Mitch, who refused to return the look his friend was giving him.

"You know what?" he mumbled bitterly and grabbed the cup tighter in his hands. "I don't even care anymore, I'm sick and tired of this shit. All I wanted was to be together with the guys again and have a good time, but Murphy fucked everything up. I still haven't talked to my parents, because I'm afraid that they'll immediately know what's up; all of our other friends have immense problems since they can't really record their videos anymore and don't even let me get started on our own videos."

Jerome stayed quiet, but in a silent form of comfort he laid a hand onto his back.
Then Mitch's phone began to ring and both stared at the display.

"Shit, I told you Mitch," Jerome groaned and buried his face in his hands, while Mitch only needed a second to decide what to do. The ringing stopped as he rejected the call and turned off his phone, before he got off his chair.

"Where are you going?"

"Recording with some old friends."
Even though Mitch had his back turned to Jerome, he knew that his friend was looking at him with concern and disapproval in his eyes. Something he probably wasn't going to change anytime soon.

The lights of the street lamps brightened the inside of the luxurious sedan from time to time, while they drove through the illuminated city. Unemotionally Mitch stared out of the car and observed the carefree people on the walkway on their way to a party with friends or simply to go home.

His phone blinked and highlighted an incoming message from one of the guys he was going to meet at a club. The need to go to another party and to get drunk again had surprisingly shown up even before he had left the house and for a moment the reward to get out of the mess with Murphy once and for all only seemed like a nice side effect. The thought of just losing his mind again, his memories of the past weeks, the doubts, the pain… His original motive came to the fore of his mind once again.
If he just annoyed him enough with not behaving properly and going astray, Murphy had to take actions sooner or later and this time he couldn't follow his regular plans. The people and fans were confused about his unusual behavior and more than once had they criticized him still being in the team.

It would be best for Murphy to throw him out and then he would be able to finally do something about the corrupt way his boss was working with the group. Mitch would be free from his grasp and could blow his cover without having to be afraid of him anymore. The only thing burdening him was the thought of his friends and his family. With a little bit of luck they would stay unharmed until he had sorted things out with Murphy.
And then Team Crafted could be united and stronger than ever before.

But if his plan didn't work out, if Murphy would take more drastic measures…

Mitch wasn't willing to think about the possibility and gladly welcomed the diversion in form of a message from Rob. It's online, here's the link. Thanks for the help, we really need it!
He didn't waste another second and copied the link to another video platform, so that he could tweet about it. Before he had left the house he had recorded some Minecraft games with his friends from Canada and their new-founded group called The Pack. They revolted against the rules of Microsoft and still uploaded their usual Minecraft videos, just on other platforms. Even though they didn't earn any money with it, they still were able to support themselves with the help of numerous donations.

After a short reply to Mitch's friend his driver stopped the car at the side of the road in front of an illuminated building, pointing to a well-known club in LA. A line of excited people blocked the entrance, but a small group stood to the left of it and greeted Mitch joyfully as he stepped out of the car.

An hour later he was standing on a seat in a separated part of the club and downed another glass, while the group surrounding him was cheering enthusiastically. He hadn't even stepped off the seat properly, when an unfamiliar girl put her arms around his neck and pressed herself against his numb body.

Over the deafening sound of the music he wasn't able to hear what she was saying to him, but the meaning was obvious nonetheless. Without thinking about it he pulled her aside to the smaller dance floor they had in their separated area and pulled her closer. They began to dance in the dimmed lighting to the infecting beat, swaying and circling around each other without defined steps and raising the other's pulse with little touches and their lips.

Again Mitch fell into the captivating rush of being able to forget everything that bothered him. The fog in his mind successfully locked Murphy out of his mind and gave way to a certain carefreeness that he had missed for so long. No videos he had to take care of, no threats, no one telling him his behavior was inappropriate for a younger audience-

A bit unsteady on his feet Mitch returned to his so-called friends on the couches, when his female companion excused herself to go to the bathroom. The procedure was repeated, more alcohol, more partying and more moments that disappeared in his dazed brain with girls he had never seen before.

The usual procedure that kept him from thinking too much about his problems.
The usual procedure that made him feel alive for a short time.

The usual procedure that abruptly stopped, when a man in a black suit painfully grabbed his arm and pulled him away from the group of his confused friends and the bittersweet illusion of peace.

"I'm done with you, Mitchell. Time to finally face your consequences."
Murphy.