AN: I own nothing. On a totally unrelated side note this was a long time coming, and I'm sure that there are those who agree with me. This was supposed to be written later, but since Volume 4 comes out next week... FUCK IT. It's happening. You may disagree with me, and that's okay but let's be reasonable RWBY is beyond perfect and great, maybe a little under okay. So here I FUCKING go.

"What the FUCK is this shit?" Here we go again. Cinder just could not believe that Onyx was once again doing his bit. "What's the matter Onyx?" "It's shit." "All of it?" "All of it." "Please by all means explain it to me." "Hold on I'll be right back." Onyx left Cinder alone for a few seconds, then he brought everyone. And by everyone she means EVERYONE to their hideout. "How did you..." "Long story so here is how it's gonna work what I say goes." "Why?" "BECAUSE I FUCKING SAID SO THAT'S WHY!" Everyone was scared to see how Onyx would punish them. "Good now where to begin..." Cinder looked at him and everyone else. He was only gone for two seconds, and he managed to bring everyone here damn. To top it all off even Salem is afraid of him. Shit he is good. "Okay first off Ruby." "Yes?" "You suck as a character and you have no development whatsoever so we are going to change that and your team so that is where I'll start." "Okay?" "Good." Neptune then spoke up. "Why do we have to do this?" "Okay tell you what Neptune if you can answer this question I won't do it and I will let you all go how about that?" "Okay." "The rest of you can help him out too if it looks like he can't answer." Cinder saw that everyone had smiles on their faces, save for Neo of course. She knew better than to hope that they would get out of here. "Why is the moon destroyed?" Then everyone's smiles faded, instantly. That was a good question though. Why the hell was the damn moon destroyed? "Umm... Well you know because." "Because?" "Umm... Sun wanna help me out here?" "Dude I don't fucking know." "Oobleck?" "I don't know." "Ozpin, Salem, anyone?" "We don't know Onyx." "There it is, so from now on you guys have a complete moon."

Then Onyx grabbed Velvet and moved her to where Team RWBY was. Onyx then stood in front of them. "Okay so first and foremost Ruby, Weiss the both of you cannot get along under any circumstance." "Why?" "With both of you we are going to have word of law vs spirit of law." "Huh?" "Do the ends justify the means? And also what it means to be a huntsman in this society should they follow orders and sacrifice those in need, or screw the orders they are given and save them anyways." "Oh." "Also Weiss, you will have a deep hatred for the Faunus even more so than what is shown." "Okay." "But, we will also make you have a really deep connection with your mother, who died in a battle where the White Fang were involved and she died protecting you." Onyx then resumed. "Which means that Velvet will take Blake's place and join Team RWBY, which will become Team RWVY." (The letter V is sometimes enunciated as B so it shouldn't be all that different.) "Why?" "Well Blake you will be on Cinder's team and infiltrate Beacon at which point you and Velvet will have a tug of war on morals concerning how Faunus should obtain equal rights." "Oh." "Yeah, but you will also try to win her over to join you and vice versa." Then Onyx resumed. "But that's later for now... Weiss you will hate on Velvet. Velvet you will not under anyway retaliate because you know that it is just ignorance on her part and pity her for not seeing things clearly at which point it will be revealed that Adam killed your mom. And both you and Velvet will kill him after he kills Blake for betraying him and his ideals." "Wait why do I have to die?" "Oh well you see he is going to ask Salem to make his army stronger by combining Faunus and Grimm alike however, this will make some kind of bioweapon that will enable Adam to destroy entire cities at a time." "Oh."

"Anyways moving on. Now Ruby..." "Onyx wait why can't we keep the story as is?" "Because it's shit that's why also the characters haven't realized their full potential. You were all written as cliches first, characters second. Not to mention that you don't need the eight months time skip." "Of course we do." "Why?" "Well uhh... Oh so that we can grow stronger." Ruby felt victorious for the better part of two seconds until Onyx punched her in the face. "Ow what was that for?" "Because you don't get it do you? What did you do during those eight months?" "Get stronger what else?" "Ruby this is an anime all you need is a FUCKING change of clothes and already you are stronger besides in the eight months that you guys were dicking around you could have chased Cinder and beaten the shit out of Salem, but no you guys just dicked around so yeah." Then Onyx continued. "So anyways where was I oh yeah. Ruby you will have a definition of a huntsman, however time and time again that definition will be tested to very harsh extremes. However, and this is the most important one YOU CANNOT KILL SALEM!" "Why?" "Because you will try to save her from her fate. Choosing the most noble path rather than simply killing her like everybody else. So rather than doing this four maidens bullshit we will just say that she has all of them stored within her and she is trying to obtain the old man's power. Which will come from Ozpin."

"Uhh Onyx I disappeared remember?" Onyx pinched the bridge of his nose. "I'am surrounded by idiots. So Ozpin are you telling me that we found your cane, but not your body?" "I'll shut up now." "Thank you. Now where are you... Jaune there you are." "Aww crap." Onyx punched Jaune right in the face breaking his nose and knocking out several teeth. Pyrrha jumped in. Onyx feigned to punch her and she immediately backed away. "Jaune I honestly thought that I was watching a harem anime because of you." "Owg gwhy?" "Well you are a total loser and are surrounded by beautiful girls in a school to fight monsters. You have the adorable one, the broody loner type, the one that pretends to hate you but secretly likes you, the blonde ditz with big tits, the nutcase, and the one stuck in the friend zone. Not to mention that Ren is more skilled than you are, but gets his ass handed to him all the time, and he looks effeminate." All the girls were shocked and felt as if their entire existence was to fulfill some type of sexual desire, which let's face it isn't far from the truth. "Oh shit I almost forgot Yang. Yang listen you will still look for your mother, but for different reasons." "Oh?" "Yes you will try to find your mother and kill her because she killed Summer, whom you considered your real mother. Ruby will not know this until much later. She, Ruby that is, will face a real moral dilemma with this. Get revenge or let her live, but it will also put your sisterly bond through some serious shit." Onyx looked around the room. "Sun, Neptune... Well let's face it the only reason why you guys exist is so that Blake and Weiss can have a love interest so I'm going to change that."

Onyx resumed. "Sun you will try to change Blake's mind about who she is until you see her kill innocent people. Then you will confront Adam for turning her into a monster at which point he will kill you. Neptune you will help Weiss get over her hatred over the Faunus given that you and Sun are good friends. She will not approve of your friendship with Sun, but in the end she will overcome her hatred." Onyx then turned to Roman, Neo, Emerald, Mercury, and Cinder. "Honestly you guys need an overhaul, but not much and it is still manageable. Neo, Roman both of you will have a deep hatred for huntsmen. Neo you were abused by huntsmen, and Roman your entire family was killed by huntsmen. Emerald you will have severe abandonment issues which is why you are always with these people due to the fact that your parents were huntsmen, but never bothered to pay attention to you so you ran away from home. Mercury, your reason for joining Cinder was because of daddy issues and you didn't want to be a stripper so... I know that's not true, but your motive will be... To be an anti-huntsman-huntsman because your father was a huntsman and abused you." Onyx then turned to Cinder. "Cinder you will be laying seeds of doubt in everyone's heads about their abilities and motives to hold power over them. This will cause a conflict of morals and characters to add tension and drama."

Onyx then began looking at everyone else. "Ironwood?" "Yes?" "I'm downgrading your military as well as the military of all the kingdoms." "WHAT!? WHY?" "Dude have you seen all the stuff you guys have? I mean do you have any idea of the kind of technology you guys have that can kill the Grimm? Seriously man if these kids can kill Grimm, then why the hell haven't the kingdoms united to kill the Grimm in one fucking war campaign. It's ridiculous." Onyx had a point what was preventing them from uniting and killing the Grimm? "Not to mention that these kids are all seriously overpowered, so I'm sure you guys can handle them as well." Onyx then looked at the rest of them. "I think I'm missing something... Hmm... Oh yeah Oobleck you will ask Ruby her reasons for being a huntress. Also the silver eyes thing is getting scrapped because Ruby you are getting too overpowered not to mention that you don't grow as a person, only in strength and that is not enough. So when Ozpin tells you about the eyes it will be because he met your mother. Yeah this is better. Now get out there and do this version." "Onyx we can't." "Why not?" "Volume 4 comes out this week." "AGH FUCK!"

AN: This was going to be uploaded much later, but then I found out from Autistic Grizzly that it was going to come out this week. The harem part was a reference to a fic a read by Rumble in the Dumbles where Neo annoys the crap out of everyone. So yeah this is me ragging on RWBY, but if you've read the other chapters you would have seen the signs. The only characters that I feel are worth a damn are Neo, Velvet, Oobleck and... Well that's it all the rest kind of suck. I really feel like RWBY could have been the next Berserk, but it doesn't hold up especially since they want to do 10 volumes of this. RWBY would have been great if it's characters could show some depth, but it's dodgy and well shitty. I know people are gonna rag on me, but you have to think about this version as opposed to the original and which would have been better. So leave a comment and what not.