Till I'm Gone
Sora Matasuki
Chapter Sixteen
"Nii-san," Hiro made a vain attempt at keeping the tremors that showed his thin patience out of his voice. "I understand that you're... worried. Believe me, it's very hard to ignore... er... not see." He rubbed his temples as he continued. "However, I have one small request to make, if that's alright with you."
Tadashi beamed at him from across the room, waiting with his arms open on the other side of the bed. "What's that, otouto?" He questioned brightly.
"Stop. Touching. Me." Hiro bit out in reply, glaring daggers at his brother.
The wounded puppy dog look that Tadashi sent him made him shudder. He had to put his foot down! He couldn't remain in his older brother's arms forever, now could he? He needed his space and Tadashi was smothering him in affection. It was driving him nuts!
Soft footfalls reached his ears and Hiro backed away from his brother, who was walking towards him with outstretched arms, that pleading look still plastered to his face.
"I don't want another hug, Tadashi! I said no!" Hiro snapped, eyes looking wildly around the room for an escape route. Tadashi crept closer and Hiro spotted a way out. It was in range of his older brother's octopus arms, though. But if he was fast enough, logically speaking, he could get past him if he ran hard enough.
Tadashi was nearly close enough to grab him by force by the time he'd calculated the best way of going through with his not so thought out plan. With a deep breath, Hiro quickly darted to the side and around his older brother's grabby hands as they dove to nab him. Quickly, he palmed his hands onto the bed and vaulted over it, wincing as his still raw wrist stung painfully at the movement. His bare feet hit the floor running, and pretty soon he'd plastered himself on the opposite side of the room, back flat against the wall.
"Bad Tadashi. Bad." Hiro pointed a shaky finger at his pouting older brother, as if he were scolding an overly affectionate Great Dane that would bowl you over at any moment in an attempt to gift your face with slobbery kisses.
"But Hirrrooooo~!" Tadashi wailed softly. "You need to get back in bed! You're not supposed to be up yet!"
Hiro bristled. "I said I'm fine, you idiot! It's not like I can do anything in this room!"
Tadashi's face darkened. "Hiro. Get back into bed, please."
The twelve year old fought back a flinch and held his ground. "No. I'm fine! I don't even get why you're so concerned about this anyways! I've said it over and over again that I'm fine but no one believes me!"
Tadashi had his eyes closed and he was slightly trembling. "Just saying words doesn't mean that you actually mean it, Hiro." he said softly and this time Hiro really did flinch, hitting his head against the wall.
"S-So? I don't wanna get back in bed, Ni-san. I'm bored out of my mind! I need to move, stretch my legs!"
"Should've thought about that before you tried to kill yourself." Tadashi said solemnly, finally deciding it would be pertinent to catch his wayward younger brother again before he could get into any trouble.
"Tadashi, I- gyaaaaack-" Hiro dove for the door. Tadashi dove for him. Tadashi won.
"Cmon, otouto. You're going to bed." Tadashi spoke nonchalantly as Hiro kicked and squirmed, tucked under his arm like a football.
"Tadashi! Put me down!" Hiro shouted, feet kicking at the air. The twelve year old let out a frustrated grunt and finally just grew limp, admitting defeat in the face of his older brother's stronger arms. That grunt turned into a startled 'woah!' as Tadashi suddenly plopped him down on the bed, the covers already drawn back and ready for him. Hiro let out a resigned and put upon sigh as Tadashi gently pushed him down into the pillows and tucked the blanket up to his chin.
Immediately after his brother had let go of the blanket, Hiro squirmed around to get his trapped arms out from underneath the suffocating covers. "Stop being such a mother hen!" he grumbled, turning onto his side so he didn't have to look at his older brother's pouting face. "I don't even get why you're still here. You've missed, like, two days of school already. It looks like you plan on going on for a third. It's been five days, Nii-san. I'm fine."
Because he was facing away from his brother, Hiro completely missed how Tadashi's face darkened and his hand fisted. What he didn't miss was the knuckles that dug entirely too hard into the top of his skull and rubbed hard and fast against his fluffy tangle of hair.
"Ow ow ow ow ow ow! Tadashi what the he-" Hiro whirled back around and froze in place at the sight of tears streaming down his older brother's face.
"You idiot! Just because you aren't hooked to any IVs or heart monitors, doesn't mean you're fine." Tadashi's hands made air quotes around the word 'fine', his voice shaky and choked with tears. Hiro shifted, hands pulling up the covers to his chin defensively.
"But I am, Tadashi! You don't - you don't have to worry! I promise I'll stay here in bed, if you'll go to school." Hiro attempted to bargain.
"And leave you all alone? Without supervision?" Tadashi's voice squeaked high in his anxiety, shaking hands reaching up to pull at normally neat black hair. Hiro rolled his brown eyes with a scowl.
"Tadashi. They did take me off of 24 hour watch, after all."
"Doesn't mean that you won't try something." Tadashi muttered. Hiro flinched and his older brother's dark eyes narrowed.
"Hiro."
Hiro tried to plaster a look of innocence on his face. "What's wrong Nii-san?"
Tadashi's face was turning bright red. He opened his mouth, just about to say something when a hesitant knock reached both Hamada's ears.
"WHAT?"
"CAN WE HELP YOU?"
The poor nurse flinched back at the volume the two Hamada brother's let loose and nervously pointed to the cart she had with her. "Breakfast?" she stammered.
Hiro brightened. "Awesome!" he moved to get out of the bed but Tadashi's firm hand halted him before he could even sit up.
Tadashi gave him a stern look. "You. Bed. Stay." he pointed a finger at Hiro's chest, to which the boy batted it away with a disgusted groan.
"You're such a mother hen, Nii-san!"
"Because someone has to do it." Tadashi muttered, before molding his face into something a little more pleasant for the poor nurse. "Sorry about that. What's on the menu for today?"
"U-um… Waffles?" the petrified nurse stammered.
Tadashi nodded. "I'll make sure he eats it all then." And then he waited.
The nurse started, realizing he was waiting to be handed a tray and moved to get it for him. "S-Sorry!"
Tadashi gently took the tray and smiled at her. "You're fine. What's your name, by the way?"
"S-Sally." the nurse stammered.
Tadashi nodded again, his smile widening. "Thank you, Sally." Then he turned around and put the tray down on the table, his eyes examining the contents of the grey plastic.
His face darkened again and suddenly his hand snapped down and grabbed something off of the tray. "SEE THIS, HIRO?!"
Hiro glanced over, having sat up once Tadashi had left his side and groaned, flopping back down and tossing his arm across his eyes melodramatically. "Oh my gosh, Nii-san. Stop it. I've told you! I'm fin-"
"YOU ARE NOT FINE, HIRO!" Tadashi's screech came at an unholy pitch. "YOU COULD HURT YOURSELF WITH THIS!" In his hand, he held a plastic knife.
Hiro uncovered his face and gave the plastic knife an inquisitive glance, considering it. "Hmmm… great idea." he grinned darkly at his brother. "Thanks, Nii-san."
Tadashi nearly had a heart attack. In a flash he had dropped the knife to clutch at his baby brother, practically sobbing in his panic.
"Nii-san, I think it's you who needs to be in the psych ward, not me." Hiro grumbled, trying to shove Tadashi's tear stained face away from his shoulder. "Jeez, it was just a joke. Stop overreacting!"
"How am I overreacting? Tell me how, when that's what got you in here in the first place!" By this time, Tadashi had managed to grab Hiro's shoulders and was shaking him. "I can't lose you, too, Hiro! Don't make me be the only one left!"
Hiro stared blankly at the wall as Tadashi pulled him into another hug. Hm… he'd never thought of that. Tadashi remembered the accident that had taken away their mom and dad. Of course it would hurt him if Hiro was gone. But… wouldn't it be better anyways? If he just left to meet up with them again? It wasn't fair that Tadashi was the only one to know them, after all.
But Hiro didn't dare to voice these thoughts. Not after Tadashi's little freakout over him. Rolling his eyes, the twelve year old connected gazes with the poor nurse (Sally, wasn't it?) who looked about ten seconds away from passing out.
'Sorry.' Hiro mouthed to her and jerked his head in a dismissive motion. He shooed a hand at her for good measure. In a daze, the nurse known as Sally nodded and slowly backed out of the room. The squeak of the cart's wheels soon faded away from Hiro's hearing. He sighed and focused back on his captor.
"Honestly, Nii-san." he sighed. "You really need to go back to school. Think about all the work you're missing - on the first days of your new classes too!"
Tadashi just hugged him tighter. "You come first." he muttered into Hiro's shoulder. "I'm not making you last ever again. You're my baby brother, you'll always be my first priority."
Hiro felt his heart constrict and he closed his eyes, inwardly cursing Tadashi and his way with words. He'd… almost believed him, that time. The hugging and clinging dragged on, driving every nerve of his up the wall. He wiggled experimentally and Tadashi's arms reflexively tightened around his upper back and shoulders.
Ugh. How do you get an older brother turned burr off? And away for that matter.
"Tadashi, you're smothering me again. Get. Off." Hiro hissed through gritted teeth, arms pinned to his chest as he tried pushing his older brother away from him. Tadashi remained firmly latched on.
"Nooooo!" Tadashi wailed, smooshing his cheek against Hiro's head and rubbing frantically. "If you do that you'll do something stupid and have to stay longer!"
Hiro groaned. All of this affection was driving him nuts. It was a constant thing when Tadashi was triggered into limpet mode. The elder Hamada did it so much, it was making Hiro feel claustrophobic!
Months of having to make do with barely a pat on the head made this entire situation very hard to deal with. He needed space to breath and Tadashi's clinging wasn't doing him any favors. It was going to drive him insane.
"Okay. Okay. How about you sit on my bed, then? That way, I don't leave it." Hiro bargained, attempting to push his brother away again and ultimately failing.
A cough caught the struggling Hamada brothers off guard and they both froze. In his wriggling, Hiro had managed to grab onto Tadashi's cheeks and began to use them as a pushing off point, so both brothers were bent at awkward angles when they had frozen. Hiro craned his head and grinned brightly at the new comer.
"Dr. Ginea! Hi!" Hiro brightly greeted his doctor. Finally! Someone who'd be able to free him from the clingy clutches from his brother!
"Hello, Hiro." The tall, black haired doctor nodded at his young patient before his laser beam brown eyes zoned in on Tadashi. "Tadashi, if you're going to cause your younger brother to make as much noise as you have, I must insist on your leaving for the day."
Tadashi wilted while Hiro let out a mental cheer.
Yes, please! the twelve year old thought, nearly dizzy from the prospect of peace that suddenly loomed over him.
But Tadashi didn't leave, he just let go of his little brother and sulked to the uncomfortable plastic hospital chair. "Yes sir…" came the quiet murmur as the teen slumped down on it.
Hiro shrugged and flopped down on the bed with a relieved sigh. Finally! Room to actually spread out!
The twelve year old glanced over at his doctor, who observed the two sulking brothers with an amused air. Making sure Tadashi wasn't looking, Hiro mouthed 'save me!' and pointed to his brother with wide, pleading eyes. Dr. Ginea snorted and motioned to his cell phone discretely, brushing his lab coat aside slightly in the process. The younger Hamada nodded fervently in reply.
"You boys behave yourselves." the medical man instructed, and he snuck away. Tadashi only had worried eyes for Hiro. The twelve year old rolled his brown eyes and gave his older brother a Look as he got up from his seat.
"Tadashi, please just sit on the bed if you're going to come over here." Hiro groaned. Tadashi pouted.
"But Hiro~!" He moaned, careful to keep his voice quiet lest Dr. Ginea actually enact on his threat. He obediently sat down on the edge of the bed though, making Hiro flop down in relief. Then the boy sat up, a thought causing his youthful brown eyes to widen.
"Tadashi, does Aunt Cass even know that you're here?" Hiro asked, a grin starting to grow on his face as Tadashi flinched slightly, fingers twitching as if he were fighting the urge to pull Hiro close.
"She doesn't? Oh, that's rich!" Hiro started laughing. "Just watch, when Aunt Cass gets here, she's gonna kill you!"
Close to tears once more, Tadashi clung to Hiro's arm. "Please don't call Aunt Cass!" He begged over Hiro's laughter.
"Too late, Tadashi! Dr. Ginea's calling her right now!" Hiro sang gleefully. "You're gonna be in so much trouble~!"
Tadashi groaned, burying his face into his little brother's shoulder. "Yeah, yeah, I got that the first time, Hiro."
Hiro let out a series of loud cackles at his big brother's discomfort. "Shoulda thought it through before you skipped for two days straight~!"
"I don't care. School can go rot in a dumpster for all that I don't care." Tadashi's voice was muffled but it still made Hiro freeze mid cackle. The younger Hamada tossed his brother an incredulous look.
"Who are you, and what have you done to my brother? You can't get into college when you've got bad attendance records!"
"Hiro." Tadashi stated seriously. "You're more important than getting into college. You're more important than anything that can come in the future, because you're my brother."
The twelve year old wanted to tear out his fluffy hair. "But you need an education so when you move out - don't look at me like that Nii-San! You're going to move out eventually, so you need to plan for it!"
Tadashi shook his head. "Hiro, planning is all well and good but when it gets so big that I start ignoring the little things, then I have a problem. I had that problem and I'm not going to let it overcome me again!"
"I need space too, ya know!" Hiro bristled. "And I'm not little!"
Tadashi looked confused. "What? It's just an expression! Hiro, what I'm trying to say is that I was busy looking at the future when I should have been paying more attention to the things happening in the present. Like you getting bullied."
Hiro flinched back. "T-Tadashi, I - what are you talking about!" Hiro gave a self conscious laugh. "I wasn-"
"Hiro." Tadashi's voice was pained and it made the twelve year old freeze, grin held weakly in place. "I saw the videos."
Hiro felt his face drain of color. "You... what?" his voice went squeaky and high pitched as he fought to keep breathing.
Tadashi gathered him up close and this time, Hiro didn't protest. "I saw the videos. I swear, I'm going to hunt down this Andrews, and his stupid cronies - and I am going to make sure they pay."
Hiro shivered at the darkness in his older brother's words. "Tadashi - no! Don't, they're not worth it! It's my fault-"
Tadashi's arms tightened around him. "Don't ever say that, Hiro. It's never your fault!" the sixteen year old gently pushed at his little brother's shoulders so he could look Hiro straight in the eye. "It's not your fault. It's theirs. And I'm going to make them pay for what they've done to you."
Hiro felt tears well up in his eyes. He was so confused! Why was Tadashi being so nice? Why was he saying all of these things? He was supposed to not care about what happened to him!
"Why are you doing this?" Hiro whispered, sounding lost and conflicted. "Tadashi, I... I don't understand it at all!
Tadashi silently pulled Hiro close to him and gently tucked Hiro's head under his chin. "You don't have to right now. Just know that I'm here for you now, Otouto. I'm not going to leave you."
Hiro sniffed softly, trembling hands slowly reaching up to as if to grasp at Tadashi's shirt. They hung there, unsure before Tadashi's larger hands gently pushed them against his chest, right over his steadily beating heart.
"But… what if you do?" he whispered, suddenly fearful. "What if you leave me?"
Tadashi kissed Hiro's temple. "Not going to happen, I promise bonehead."
Hiro curled deeper into Tadashi's embrace as the tears began to fall, softly, silently. The only way you could tell he was crying was by the slight shake of his shoulders, and the dampness of his cheeks and where Tadashi's shoulder met with one of those cheeks.
Tadashi wrapped his arms around his little brother a little tighter and rocked him back and forth. His mind searched desperately for the words he had once sung in situations like this when Hiro had woken him up at three in the morning after a nightmare and he couldn't go back to sleep. He hummed a few bars and then frowned, shaking his head. No... that wasn't it. How did it go again?
Oh yeah.
"Hush now my little one, hush
be still as dreams take your sleep
let me watch o'r you and let
your smiles come to be.
Rest now my little one, rest
and lay your head down to sleep
I will watch o'r you
And protect your dreams
till morning is nigh.
Darkness may creep
and darkness may fight.
But you lay under my watch tonight
So sleep my baby brother, sleep.
I'll stay till morning light."
Hiro sleepily stirred in his arms. "You haven't sung that… in a while…" he yawned sleepily. Tadashi chuckled.
"How about you go to sleep, buddy." Tadashi suggested quietly. Half asleep already, Hiro didn't protest when Tadashi picked him up and tucked him back into bed. Tadashi sat down on the edge of the bed and let out a sad sigh.
"Tadashi?"
The teen in question flinched in surprise and turned guilty eyes towards the door, where Aunt Cass stood.
He waved weakly. "Hi Aunt Cass…"
"Can we talk? Outside?" she asked. Tadashi hung his head and stood up. Yeah… he was in so much trouble…
AN: *falls over* Man! At the rate you guys review, we'll be at 500 at the end of this chapter O.O this has never happened to me before (the shocks returning lol) Thank you soooo much everyone! (PS if someone could draw a comic based off of the scene where Tadashi and Hiro are talking about the knife, you would make my LIFE, just add in the knife knife in the air before it falls and I will LOVE YOU FOREVER IM NOT JOKING)
Anyways, the beginning part of this chapter was written by the lovely Melanie-March (my lovely editor TTUTT i'm so lucky to have her~) as I was completely stumped on how to get Tadashi out of the hospital room (which happens in chapter 17 YES), so until "The wounded puppy dog look…" is all her wonderful writing. Also, Melanie is writing a fic based off of this where Hiro actually manages to escape his room (It's beautiful, I've been laughing ever since the first page). She's asked me to insert it as a second chapter, I hope everyone has enjoyed it as much as I have! Also, thanks to AmyXRoseXMoon since she joined in on our planning session and we've all laughed ourselves silly in this chapter, and was a wonderful unbaised third party when me and Melanie were conflicted on an editing decision. So THANK YOU AMY!
NOW! Onto thanks! Big thanks go too: Blue-D, ArianandXaia, WriterGurl11, Phinbellafan2298, regularshow565, DreamweaverAki, TridentTattoo, AmyXRoseXMoon, TooLazyToLogin, seems-pretty-legit, JarrettSoon, disneybrony, Guest (#1), KanaMac, Shoyzz, Marvel Mistress94, CrazyCartoonistOtaku, Cori the Freak-of-nature, mog the 13th moogle, guest (#2), animesbff, Purpalz Miner, DreamGirll, narniac4aslan, Thelastone, kartoonfreek99, thetimehasturned3, sherlywherlylock, bumblebee78, Snowflake, The Golden Marauder, PrincessWilla202, Disney Girl 26, Guest (#3), SoaringOnWings, The Real Mystery Writer, Disneynerdbh6, The DiamondSword400, Evagelion Hill, Silverstream, Guest (#4), Madness Shared, Sushi Hawkeye, BrokenWings2602, Blackwind137, Fairytale Warrior, h, Guest (#5), DarthRexPoke44, CookieKittys, nataeiy1, ParanoidSylph, Atariel Tsukai, aaaand DisneyandWildKrattfangirl!