I need some feedback from you all. At the beginning of this story, each chapter was getting a good amount of reviews. The last chapter only had five; with 164 followers to the story, I expect a couple more reviews. Could you all let me know if there's something I'm doing wrong, or something else you would like to see? I love writing this story and I'm excited to do the second round of ABCs where Erin and Jay have kids, but if no one is interested, then I may not write it. Thank you to those that have reviewed, and please keep doing so! All of your opinions are what influence this story!
This chapter is based off of the episode "The Song of Gregory William Yates". It contains a lot of direct quotes from the episode, along with a few extra scenes that I added in. Let me know what you think!
N: Nadia
*Even though Nadia is gone, she is still with Erin every day and Jay can see how her death has impacted his girlfriend. Based off episode 3x14 "The Song of Gregory William Yates".
Hank looked at his team, all sitting blissfully unaware at their desks. He had just gotten a phone call from Lieutenant Olivia Benson of New York's SVU team, informing him that they had a case with a connection to Gregory Yates. He wanted to speak to one of Olivia's detectives, but instead, Olivia wanted to send Erin.
Hank had seen his surrogate daughter fall down a dark hole once because of this man. He had killed Nadia and changed their team's lives forever. But of them all, Erin had been affected the most. She had taken Nadia in and helped her change; she saw the girl as a younger version of herself and wanted to make life better for her.
He observed his team. Erin was sitting at her desk, though her focus was across the room on where Jay was at his desk, telling her some kind of story. Adam and Atwater were in the break room, and Al and Antonio were talking quietly. Mouse had gone to get coffee.
Hank knew that Erin would be furious if she didn't have the chance to talk to this man. But he didn't want her to completely lose it again. He knew if he went with her, she would feel too trapped. He considered sending Halstead; after all, he is her partner and he's the one who brought her back from the dark side. But he knew that the younger man lacked the ability to say no to his girlfriend, so he had to choose someone better. Erin had a way of softening Alvin, and Ruzek and Atwater were too inexperienced. That really only left one choice.
"Lindsay and Dawson, pack a bag. You're going to New York. Your flight leaves in two hours."
"I've got my kids this weekend." Dawson started to protest. "What's this about?"
"Gregory Yates."
The entire room fell into silence. Dawson and Lindsay both rose, no longer protesting anything.
"What's going on?" Erin questioned. "What is he doing now?"
"He wants to talk to Rollins, but Lieutenant Benson doesn't want him anywhere near her. She thinks that he might talk to you instead."
"I'll go so Antonio can have his kids." Jay offered.
"No. Dawson and Lindsay." Hank insisted. "Go take care of whatever needs to be taken care of and get back here in an hour. All of you." He looked pointedly at Jay, giving him permission to leave and be with Erin for the rest of this time. He knew that she would need to talk about it to someone and Halstead was the best bet.
He watched as they all left and hoped that he was doing the right thing by sending her.
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Jay sat on the bed and watched as Erin threw some clothes into a bag. She was supposed to just be going there for a talk with Yates, but he knew how these things ended up. Yates would probably toy with her for a while and manipulate her without giving any real information. He wanted to be there with her.
Erin was beyond tense and she could barely even look at him. He could tell she was staring to harden her walls already to prepare herself to see him. Jay stood and went over to her.
"Hey." He said quietly, wrapping his arms around her from behind. She relaxed in his embrace and let out a sigh. "You know you don't have to do this, right? If it's going to be too much…"
"It's not." She turned so she could look at him. "I have to talk to him. I have to know what's going on and if he knows anything. For Nadia."
"I'm just scared about what it might do to you." He admitted.
She leaned up to kiss him. "I've got a reason to fight it. No matter what, Nadia is gone. I've accepted that. Yates can say anything and it won't change the fact that she was an amazing person and that I'm lucky to have gotten the chance to know her."
"You're right." He hugged her close. "You can call me if you need anything, you know that, right? Even if you just want to talk about something else to get your mind off of it. And if you need me to come there and be with you, I'll be on the first flight to New York. I know you can handle this, babe, but I don't want you to go through it alone."
"I know you're here, and I'll have Antonio too. And Hank and Olivia. I'll be okay. It's gonna be hard, but I can handle it." She pulled away from him. "We have to get back to the station. Thank you for being here and always looking out for me."
"You don't have to thank me. That's what I'm here for." He leaned down and picked up her bag. "Come on."
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When Erin walked into the room containing her friend's killer, she immediately felt her skin crawl. She felt Antonio's hand on the small of her back, but she moved forward. She could handle this.
She laid out the pictures of the newest victims and watched as Yates stared at them. He still had the same sickly smile. She couldn't even fully focus on what he was saying because she was overwhelmed by how much she hated him.
Maybe she couldn't do this.
"…that same place where your friend, Nadia, was found."
"After you murdered her." Erin couldn't help but remind him.
"Dr. Yates, we're here because we heard you might have information about these victims." Antonio interrupted, keeping them on task. Erin could tell he wanted to get in and get out as quickly as possible. She wondered if Hank or Jay had asked him to watch out for her and make sure she stayed cool.
Erin watched as Yates played games with Antonio, acting like he didn't know what happened. She felt herself slowly get more and more nauseous with the more he spoke. Antonio laid the pictures in front of him.
"Mmmm…so young. I don't imagine that's what they look like when their killer encounters them."
"Where?" Erin demanded.
"It could be at a truck stop, whoring themselves out for cocaine. You must know the power of addiction."
She could have leapt across the table and strangled him then. "We're here to talk about these girls, not me."
"Nadia talked a lot about you. On our drive. How Sergeant Voight took you off the street, mentored you. That man has a lot of anger. It must have been very scary growing up in his home."
Erin pushed herself back from the table. She knew she wasn't getting anything out of him. "We're done." She was grateful when Antonio followed her lead and collected all of the pictures off of the table.
"Sorry you wasted your trip." He called as she and Antonio walked towards the door.
"I'm sure." She replied. She thought her heart was going to beat out of her chest from how angry she was getting.
"Tell the warden I would be much more comfortable talking to Detective Rollins."
"She's not coming up here." Antonio answered.
Yates gasped and stood up. "She must have had her baby by now! Is it a boy or a girl?"
If Erin's skin wasn't crawling before, it definitely was now. "That is none of your business."
"You want closure for those families? Get her here." He sat down and looked away from them. "By tomorrow."
Erin followed Antonio out of the room. He turned to look at her. "You okay?"
"I'm good." She was lying, and she knew he could tell that she was lying.
"Erin…"
"I'm fine."
"Just call Jay, okay? You don't have to talk to me, but you need to talk to someone. You're not alone."
"I'll call him." Erin said. Talking to him sounded like the best thing in the world right now. "I'll be back."
She went into the bathroom and shut the door behind her, turning the lock into place. She clicked on his name and waited for him to answer.
"Hey baby." He greeted.
"Hi." She hated the way her voice shook. "What are you doing?"
"Laundry. I already finished loading the dishwasher, and I'll probably vacuum next." She was glad her boyfriend was such a neat freak because she was very messy.
"That's good." She took a deep breath and let it out slowly.
"Everything okay?" he asked hesitantly.
"I just needed to hear your voice. I just talked to Yates."
"How did that go?"
"We didn't get anything out of him. He wanted to talk about my past and how living with Hank must have been so scary." She rolled her eyes even though he couldn't see her. "I'm so angry, Jay. I feel like I'm bouncing from how much anger I have towards him. I hate giving him that power."
"As long as you don't show it, you're not giving him anything. Just keep your cool and do what you came to do."
"It's so hard."
"I know, but you're good at what you do." He paused. "What did he say about your past?"
"Something about my addiction. About how Nadia talked a lot about me and Hank on their drive. Their drive like it was some vacation they decided to take together. And he won't let wanting to talk to Rollins go. He asked about her baby, Jay. He makes me feel sick."
"Well you talked to him and there's not much else you can do if he's not giving you the information you need. It won't be too much longer until you get home."
"But Olivia really doesn't want Rollins to go in there. What if he doesn't give any information? Then those families never get closure. I'm sure there's something else I could do."
"Erin, it's not worth sacrificing yourself. Olivia will find a way."
She sighed. "I know she will. I've gotta go, Antonio is waiting for me. I'll see you when I get home."
"Okay, call me if you need anything. I love you."
"I love you too." She disconnected the phone call. She definitely wasn't just going to sit back and let Yates get away with this.
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Erin and Antonio sat in chairs at the airport, both of them lost in their own thoughts. They were ready to get back to Chicago and be done with this whole situation. Right as they were able to board the plane, Erin's phone rang.
"It's Voight." She said before answering. "Hey Hank, we're about to get on the plane now."
"Don't. I need you to take a car back to SVU."
"What's going on?" she questioned, gaining Antonio's attention.
"Yates and another murderer, Carl Rudnick, escaped from Green Haven. Lieutenant Benson needs as much help as she can get. They've killed two people already."
Erin's blood ran cold. She took a deep breath. "We'll go back." She hung up the phone and looked to Antonio. "Yates escaped."
"What?" he asked in shock.
"He and another inmate escaped. They killed two people. Lieutenant Benson asked for us to stay."
He nodded his head. "Let's go."
They were able to get their luggage back quickly when they showed their badges, and they got into a taxi. Erin could feel her heart beating in her ears. She couldn't believe that he was out. She wondered how many more people he would hurt. Her pulse quickened; she wouldn't let him hurt anyone else.
"We'll get him, Erin." Antonio reassured her. She just nodded her head as her phone vibrated, signaling she had a text message.
From: Jay
Just heard about Yates. You guys will get him. I love you and I'm here if you need me.
She texted back a quick 'love you too' and closed her eyes, trying to mentally prepare herself for anything that would come up.
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"Son of a bitch." Erin breathed as she stared down at the body of the trooper.
"You okay?" Antonio asked. She could hear the concern in his voice, but she didn't need it. She just needed to find the man responsible for this.
"This is Yates." She stated confidently. She knew for sure that it was him. As Dodds entered, she told him too. "How did the trooper end up here?"
"First responder got a call from a neighbor who saw smoke coming out of the chimney. The owner never stays here in the winter."
"How long ago?" Antonio wondered.
"An hour. They also found a blood trail outside. One of them may be hurt, might of slowed them down. The dogs are on both scents." He gestured towards the door and Antonio started to follow.
As he looked at his teammate, he knew that she was in over her head. She wasn't handling this well. Instead of going outside, he went over to her.
"Hey." He put his hand on her back gently and she turned to look at him. "We'll get him."
She didn't reply and looked to the ground. Antonio went outside as Erin stared at the body of the trooper. She wasn't going to let this happen again. She was going to find Yates and fix this.
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"All the agencies are on it. They'll find him." Dodds said as he hung up his phone. Erin kept her focus on the road. "My Lieutenant wants us to come back."
"Yeah, I'm not doing that. I'll drop you at a rest stop if you want."
"Detective, I know he killed somebody close to you, but this isn't us anymore."
Erin looked over and saw a police car parked off to the side of the road. "What the hell is that?" She stopped the car and put it in reverse.
"Pull over." Dodds commanded.
Erin pulled in behind the police car and saw that there was another in front of it. The two of them got out of the car.
"This is Sergeant Dodds NYPD requesting backup…"
Erin held her gun and her flashlight, looking for any sign of danger. But she could feel it. She knew that Yates was near. Her breathing started to get heavier; she wondered if Nadia knew that Yates was near on the night he took her. She started to jog forward when she saw a body.
"I've got a trooper down." She announced. She felt his pulse. Four dead now, and Rudnick injured. "He's gone!" she made a startling realization only seconds later. "So is his gun!"
Before either of them could react, shots were fired. A bullet his Dodds, while Erin moved to take cover behind the truck.
"Stay down! Take cover!" Dodds shouted. He picked up his radio. "This is Sergeant Dodds. Shots fired. Two officers down. Suspect is armed and in flight. Requesting immediate backup."
"Dodds, are you okay?" she asked as she studied him.
"I'm fine, just stay down." He insisted.
If Erin was with her own team, there's no way it would have happened. They would have known instantly what she was planning, but Dodds didn't know her very well and he was injured, so he couldn't really stop her. She stood up and shined her flashlight into the woods.
"Detective, what are you doing?"
For once, she was glad her team wasn't there. She could do what needed to be done.
"Detective, stay down!"
She ignored him, walking away from her cover and into the woods.
"Get back here! Wait for backup! Get back here! Detective!"
Erin couldn't hear his voice anymore as she ran into the woods. She knew Voight would be furious, and she would most likely get a lecture from Jay, but she had to do this. She had to take care of what needed to be done.
As she ran, she fell, slamming her body to the ground. She felt pain radiate everywhere, but mostly in her left leg. She didn't think she broke it, but she had definitely hurt something. If it was anyone else, she may have stayed down. But this was Yates and this was for Nadia.
She found her flashlight and forced herself back up to search for her gun. She clenched her teeth as hard as she could in an attempt to ignore the pain. She saw a cabin sitting in the woods and she knew that that was where she would find him.
In that moment, she wished Jay was there. Her heart was beating so fast she thought it might fall out of her chest. She could barely get in a breath, her leg was throbbing, she hadn't slept in two days, and she just needed someone to have her back right now. But she couldn't stop. She had to find Yates.
Erin climbed the stairs slowly and cautiously. She opened the door and shined her flashlight inside. It didn't take long for her to find a little girl hiding under a table.
For a second, she thought about her own childhood. She had hidden many times from Bunny's boyfriends and from abusive men. She wondered if Nadia had experienced the same thing. The child closed her eyes, as if that would make her disappear, and even though Erin needed to find Yates, she needed to help this little girl.
"Hey. It's okay. I'm the police, are you alright?"
"My daddy." The little girl whimpered.
Erin heard the gunshot and turned her head towards the shot. "I need you to stay right where you are, okay?" she didn't give the child a chance to reply as she stood and ran out the door.
Breathe, Erin, breathe, she chanted in her head. If she didn't breathe, she was going to pass out.
A truck started driving towards her and she saw Yates in the driver's seat before she had to dive out of the way. She gasped at the way she landed, feeling her leg begin to throb even more, but she still forced herself up. She ran over and braced herself. She started to shoot at the tires of the truck. As she watched him drive away, Erin could have cried.
She knew she couldn't catch him, so instead, she started to look for the victim of the gunshots. She found him dead next to a tree with a piece of paper stuffed into his mouth.
See you back home, Erin.
She heard the faint sound of police sirens as she struggled to catch her breath. She didn't have the motivation to move anymore. Yates had gotten away, and he had killed this little girl's father. Five deaths.
"Lindsay!" she heard voices begin to yell. But she couldn't speak. If she spoke, she was scared she wouldn't have enough air to breathe and she needed to breathe.
"Erin!" she felt someone shaking her shoulder. "Erin, hey. You okay?" she recognized Antonio's voice and his hand on her arm. "Voight's on the phone. He wants to talk to you."
"No." she managed to gasp out.
"You're hyperventilating. Take deep breaths." He instructed.
"Little girl…" she pointed towards the house. Rollins and Carisi headed in that direction.
"Erin, come on. Close your eyes and focus. Inhale and exhale." Antonio told her calmly. "Voight, can you put Halstead on?"
Her interest perked at the sound of her boyfriend's name. Before she could protest, she heard the words 'panic attack' and 'escaped' before the phone was pressed against her ear.
"Hey baby, everything is okay. Do you hear me? You're alright. Antonio's got you and you're safe now. He said that you saved a little girl. We're gonna find Yates, okay? Right now, you need to focus on you. I need you to take some deep breaths, Erin. Just close your eyes and pretend you're at home. We're laying on the couch watching a movie and you're in my arms. There are Chinese containers lying on the coffee table and you yell at me about how I can't touch them because I always clean everything, but then I would end up cleaning them up the next morning anyway because you forgot. Can you say something so I know you're okay?"
"He's gone." She whimpered.
"We'll get him."
"How many more people will die first?" she asked. Before he could answer, she pushed the phone away.
"It's Antonio…yeah, I will…see you soon." He hung up the phone. "You good?"
She nodded her head. She didn't trust her voice right now. Erin went to stand, but she felt the pain radiate through her left leg and she bit down on her lip. Antonio noticed and wrapped his arms around her to help her stand.
"What happened?"
"I fell." She stated simply. She tried to walk, but any pressure just made it worse. Antonio sighed and lifted her into his arms. She was too exhausted to protest as he carried her over to the car.
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Erin had never felt more defeated than she did when she and Antonio arrived in Chicago. They waited until it was their turn to exit the plane.
"How's your leg?"
"It's good." She lied. As soon as she went to take a step forward, she stumbled. Her leg was starting to feel better, but she had been sitting for a while, so she blamed it on that.
Antonio reached over and lifted her up. "I know you don't like to depend on people, but we're all here for you. You're not going to be able to do anything with an injured leg."
"The doctor in New York looked at it. He said it was fine."
"Yeah, but you've been sitting for a while. I don't want you to fall and hurt it worse. Just let me carry you."
Erin let him carry her off the plane. As they walked out, she saw Hank and Jay standing there. She hated that they were both there; why weren't they back at the station looking for clues on where to find Yates?
"Erin?" Jay rushed forward. "What happened? Are you okay?"
She had specifically asked Antonio not to say anything over the phone about her hurting her leg, but by the look on Hank's face, she was pretty sure Olivia had already mentioned it to him.
"I fell. I'm fine."
"I'm gonna take you to Med to get checked out…"
"She was checked out in New York. She's fine, just a little bruised up." Hank answered.
Jay turned to him. "You knew she was hurt and you didn't tell me?"
"You didn't need to worry about something that wasn't that serious."
Jay shook his head. "Let's just get back to the station." He reached his arms out and Antonio transferred the small woman to him. He wondered how badly she was hurt if she was letting herself be carried.
"You guys sit. We'll get the luggage." Antonio stated. He and Hank walked away while Jay sat down and held Erin on his lap.
"You good?"
"Yep."
"Erin…"
"I'm exhausted." She admitted. She let her head rest against his shoulder and he rubbed her back gently.
"I know. It'll be over soon. We'll get him." He kissed her forehead. "Have you slept at all?" she shook her head. "It's been three days, baby."
"I've tried, I just can't."
Jay saw Antonio and Voight coming and looked at his girlfriend. "Do you need me to carry you?"
"I think I can walk, just put your arm around me so I don't get embarrassed if my leg gives out. I'm okay, I had just been sitting for a while and I tried to stand to get off the plane, but I almost fell so Antonio picked me up."
Erin stood with Jay's help and she felt his arm lock around her waist. She tried to mentally prepare herself for what was to come. She wasn't going to give up until Yates was locked up, or even better, dead.
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"Greg Yates escaped custody last night in upstate New York after killing two state troopers, two electric workers, a camper, and shooting Sergeant Dodds. Dodds, he'll make a full recovery, thank God." Antonio briefed the team.
"And Yates?" Ruzek questioned.
Jay picked up. "Pennsylvania troopers found a truck abandoned on a state road. State forensics lifted Yates' prints and a motorist there ID'd Yates as pretending to have car trouble, then knocking him out to take his car."
"He repeated the pattern in Ohio and Indiana." Antonio continued. "Last vehicle brought him to the Illinois border. Crime lab confirms Yates' prints, but there are no leads after that."
"Yeah, except one." Voight interrupted. All eyes were on him as he walked to the front of the room and pointed at the note Erin had found in New York. "Erin. The reason Yates is here."
"No. He's just trying to get in our heads. We put out a BOLO investigative alert and Amber Alerts on the vehicle. Troopers are watching every highway coming into Chicago." Erin stated.
"New York SVU is questioning Carl Rudnick, the guy Yates escaped with, who's back in custody. Lieutenant Benson will be in touch when they have anything to report." Antonio finished.
"Well until then I want us on every transient, hotel, shelter, food bank in the city. Remember, this guy will kill or maim to get what he wants. And flag the credit cards of the vehicle owners. See if there was a safe haven he used last time he was here. Let's get on it." Everyone started to file out of the room to follow Voight's orders.
"How's your knee?" Jay asked Erin as he came over to her desk.
"It's okay." He gave her a look. "I'm fine."
Jay sighed and let it go. "Alright, I'm gonna run with the carjack victims, see if he grabbed any phones."
"Okay. Thanks." Erin sat down at her desk, barely even giving him a second look.
Just as she was about to make a phone call, Voight interrupted her. "Erin, Antonio, come on in here."
They stood and listened to Lieutenant Benson give them the information she had managed to get from Rudnick. As Antonio stated the location, Erin's heart stopped.
"That's near your apartment." Hank reminded her.
"It doesn't mean anything." She stubbornly insisted. She couldn't have them all think she was some sort of victim that needed to be protected. They didn't need to worry about her; they needed to focus on Yates.
Before he could say anything else, Platt informed them that four women in the same apartment building had just been murdered. As Hank, Antonio, and Erin went to leave, the older man called out to her.
"You're riding with me."
Erin clenched her teeth and didn't say anything. She didn't need anyone hovering over her right now. She was sick of being treated like she could break at any second. Yes, she had relapsed after Nadia's death. But she had changed. She wasn't going to fall off the edge again.
She and Hank went to his car as he called the rest of the team and ordered them to get to the apartment building. Erin stared out the window and hoped that he wouldn't try and talk to her.
"How you holding up, kid?"
"I'm fine."
"You know, everyone can see through that lie."
"I said I'm fine."
The rest of the ride was quiet until they arrived on the scene. The rest of the team had beaten them there and Hank, Erin, and Jay followed Burgess into the apartment.
Erin looked at the bloody crime scene in front of her. She didn't know if it was all of the blood, the fact she hadn't slept and barely eaten, or that it was Yates who had done this, but she felt sick to her stomach. She couldn't even imagine what these girls had gone through.
What Nadia had gone through.
She shook her head; this wasn't about Nadia. That was over with. Yates would be put back in prison where he belonged and serve his time for what he did to Nadia, along with his crimes towards these other girls. She had to tell herself that.
Nine victims.
As time passed, things got worse. Hank refused to let her out of her sight. Though he tried to say he wasn't benching her, Erin knew him. She knew that he would try and protect her, but she also knew he was being unreasonable.
"We just left a scene with three dead nurses, I'm not the one you need to worry about." She reminded him as they exited the apartment.
"Erin, he's baiting you."
"No, he's not. He's using me to get under your skin and it's working."
"You make one mistake with Yates, you're dead, you get that?"
"If he wanted me, he would have had me in upstate New York."
"Well he's not getting a second chance."
Before she could argue, her phone rang. She held in the urge to scream when she saw the name that popped up on the phone.
"It's Bunny." She told Hank as she ignored the call. "She's back from Reno, she kicked husband number 5 to the curb."
"She want more money?"
"I don't know what she wants." This definitely wasn't what mattered right now. Her drug addict of a mother could wait. "Hank, if I'm bait, let me be bait. I can draw him in! Let me do my job."
"Get in the car."
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Hank hated to have to say no to her. He could tell she was hurting and he knew that work would be a good outlet for all of her stress, but his fatherly instincts were kicking in. There was no way he was going to send the girl he considered a daughter into harm's way.
"Halstead." He called out. The younger man came into his office and shut the door behind him.
"What's up, Sarge?"
"Has Erin been talking to you at all?" he questioned.
He could see the man's loyalty as he debated on whether or not to speak to him about Erin. He respected that, but right now, he needed to know everything that was going on with her. Jay must have come to the same conclusion.
"She keeps saying she's fine, but I think we all know that isn't true. She hasn't slept since she left for New York."
Hank sighed. "I don't think it's safe for her to be out there. What are your thoughts?"
Jay seemed conflicted. "It's not my decision to make."
"I know it's not, but I want your opinion."
"I think she needs to get some rest and detox from the situation for a little bit. If that happened, then I think she would be good to go. She's at a good place mentally from what I can tell, she's just so amped up and she has nowhere to put her energy."
Hank nodded. "We both know Erin won't leave the station until Yates is caught, and I can't spare you to try and get her to stay at home."
"Then keep her off the case." Jay sighed. "I hate going behind her back and talking about her like this, but I don't want her to get hurt. She can't give 100% right now though and I'm not willing to risk her life."
"I'm glad we're on the same page. Let's keep an eye on her."
Jay nodded his head and exited Voight's office. He just hoped they were making the right decision.
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"Hey guys, there's a note left in the car Yates drove here!" Antonio called out to Jay and Atwater as they approached him.
Jay's steps quickened. The last time this psycho had left a note, it was for his girlfriend and he wasn't ready for a repeat of that. He leaned down to look into the window as he grabbed the white piece of paper.
"Too bad you're at the station, Erin. You're missing all the fun." He couldn't keep the disgust out of his tone. "What the hell is going on?"
Jay didn't understand this. Yates was leaving little notes for Erin, but targeting this Nellie Carr woman. What was his game here? Which one of them was he actually going after? What was the connection?
He dialed his girlfriend's number and sighed in relief when she answered. "Hello?"
"Hey, where are you?"
"At the station being babysat by Voight." He could hear her frustration. "What's going on?"
"We just found another note." He read to her what the paper said. "I know you hate that everyone is being so protective, but please just stay with Voight."
"I can't make any promises."
"Erin, I'm not going to lose you too. Please do what Voight wants."
"I'll see you back at the station." The call disconnected. He just prayed his girlfriend would see reason and stop trying to solve this on her own.
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"You didn't put up Nadia's picture with all the other past victims. Nadia's not up there." Erin pointed out as she stared at the white board.
Sergeant Platt nodded her head. "Yeah, her name is up there, I-I thought maybe a photograph…"
"She should be up there with everybody else." Erin insisted.
"Absolutely. I'll fix it. I'm sorry." Sergeant Platt reassured her.
Erin nodded her head and exited the room. She went to the bathroom and shut the door behind her. She leaned up against the door and took a few deep breaths.
This case was going to consume her. She could feel it already pulling at her weakening defenses. She had been trying so hard to accept Nadia's death, and right when she did, Yates decides to start playing games.
She slid her back down the wall next to the door and pulled her knees up to her chest. A few tears slid down her cheeks and she wiped them away angrily. She didn't get to cry. She was still alive and she was safe and it was her fault Nadia was dead anyway. It was probably for the best that Yates just take her and make her pay for what she had done to the girl who had trusted her.
The bathroom door opened and Erin held her breath, hoping that whoever it was didn't see her. She cursed herself for not locking the door as she came face to face with Ruzek.
"Hey, sorry. I didn't mean to come barging in." he started to exit, but then stopped. "You good?"
"Mmhmm." She nodded to try and reassure him because she didn't trust her voice.
Adam came into the bathroom and let the door shut behind him. He sat on the floor across from her.
"I don't know how you're going through this. I know that you lost your way a couple months ago, and that this would be enough to send anyone back over the edge. But Erin, you can't give him that power. Yates already took Nadia from us; he can't take you too."
And that's when Erin remembered that she wasn't the only one who lost Nadia. The rest of her team had loved the girl too, and they had already lost her. It wasn't fair for them to have to lose both Nadia and Erin.
She nodded her head. "Thanks, Adam."
He stood and offered her a hand. She took it gratefully because she knew she wouldn't be able to stand on her own with her injured leg.
"Don't worry. I won't mention the fact that I found you crying on the bathroom floor to Voight or Halstead."
She gave him a small smile. "Thank you."
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"Sergeant, the front desk just called up. A package was delivered for Detective Lindsay by a homeless woman who ID'd Yates as the one who paid her to drop it off. It's a big box." Burgess announced as Erin begged Hank to let her at least try and figure out where Yates could be.
Voight nodded at the new information. "Alright, get out of the building." He pointed to Mouse. "Call the bomb squad." He turned to Erin. "Get everyone out of the building now. Let's go."
As everyone shuffled out of the station and into the snowy Chicago weather, Erin wondered what this box would hold. She wished it would be some big clue about where Yates was hiding out at, but she knew it was unlikely. It would probably just be another one of his games.
"We X-rayed it, it's not a bomb. Your people are safe." The leader of the bomb squad told Voight and the rest of his team. "But you're gonna want to check this out."
Erin was the first to move forward. "It's addressed to me." She knew that they would argue against her opening it, but she wasn't taking no for an answer. She took a knife from one of the officers next to her and slid it across the packaging tape. She wasn't sure what was inside, but she knew Hank and Jay were looking over her shoulders to try and tell.
She definitely wasn't expecting a bloody hand holding a note.
Erin put the knife down and reached inside.
"Erin, don't." Jay protested.
She didn't listen. It wasn't even a choice; she had to know what the note said. She read the note out loud:
Why don't you answer when your Mother calls?
Right on cue, her phone rang.
"He knows she opened the box. He's here, watching." Commander Crowley announced. "Fan out, now! Go! Go!" Officers began to search the area.
"That means this morning, it wasn't Bunny who called, it was Yates." Erin informed her team.
"Just answer it." Hank commanded.
Erin answered the call and internally cringed at the sight of Yates' face.
"Detective Lindsay." He smiled his sickening smile. "Hey, do you know Nellie Carr?" he moved the phone back so she could see the redheaded woman. Erin could clearly see the fear in her face and she wondered what this psycho had already done to the poor woman. He continued to speak as she just watched Nellie and hoped that she was safe. "Do you…are those dark circles under your eyes? Couldn't sleep?"
"You've been keeping me busy. You have my attention now, what do you need?"
He laughed and she swallowed to keep the bile in her throat from rising. "Gosh, what do I need?"
"Did you want the concern of the city?" Erin questioned. "You got that. You wanted the whole district to sit up?" she moved her phone so he could see all of District 21 searching the surrounding area. "Look. See? You did all this." She moved the phone back to her face. "But you keep sending notes to me. So why don't you tell me where you are? I'll come to you."
"Uh, you know where I am." Yates said.
"Why don't you pretend I'm not that clever and tell me anyway?"
"And ruin all the fun?"
"Then tell me why you killed those four nurses when all you really wanted was Nellie."
"You are trying to get me to confess with witnesses present. You are recording me without my permission and questioning me without a lawyer present, shame on you, Detective."
"Okay. Okay. Then why me? Why are you leaving all the notes for me?"
"I've been thinking a lot about Cane and Able, you know? If they were the only descendants of Adam and Eve and Cane killed Able, well, you know what that means, don't you? We're all descendants of a murderer." Yates stared to laugh as Nellie began to cry even harder. "I will see you soon, Detective." He ended the call.
But Erin noticed something as he moved his phone out of the way. In the background, there was a picture that she knew very well.
Mouse lost the signal as Jay began to speak. "Mouse, how does he know where she is and what we've been doing?"
Mouse's eyes opened wide. "Your phone." He held his hand out to Erin. "Give me your phone." He started to mess around with it. "Detective Lindsay's phone…it's using 5 times the regular data. That means…"
"Spyware." Jay interrupted
"Okay, he's been listening in on conversations. He's probably been reading texts, emails, he can turn on the camera, and the card in the bullpen."
"But how would he have access to it? When?" Jay demanded as he turned to Erin.
She thought it over in her head. It hit her as she looked at Antonio. "When he went to the jail we had to surrender our phones."
"The corrupt guard." He realized.
"Give it to me." Erin said. Mouse gave her back her phone as she moved to the end of the video to the small glimpse she had caught of the familiar picture. She zoomed in on a picture of her and Nadia. "Guys, I know where he is, he's in my apartment. This picture is at my place."
"Let's go." Hank ordered as they all ran towards the building.
Erin couldn't believe he had gotten into her apartment. He had murdered Nadia, killed many others, and now, he was violating her personal space, which was also the last place Nadia had lived in her life?
She was starting to hope more and more that someone would kill Yates instead of returning him to prison.
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Jay had been to Erin's apartment many times. While they primarily stayed at his apartment (it was easier than her dealing with all of the memories of Nadia that came with her place), they had spent their fair share of time at her apartment in the beginning of their relationship. But in all the times he had been there, he never had to check the area for any type of danger.
He led the team into the apartment and they fanned out to search for any sign of Yates or Nellie. As they gathered in Erin's bedroom, Atwater noticed a chair pushed against the closet door. He opened it up and revealed Nellie sitting on the floor.
"No, don't shoot! Please!" she cried out.
Jay looked behind Nellie at Erin's clothes and shoes and thought about what would happen if this was her. What if Yates had grabbed her instead of leaving notes and tied her up in her closet? Or worse, what if he did the same thing to her that he did to Nadia?
Jay didn't allow himself much time to think about Nadia. Erin brought her in and helped her change her life and he was grateful for that. Nadia was smart and determined, and she would have definitely been a great police officer. But after Nadia's death, Jay didn't worry as much about her as he did about Erin. Everything became about pulling Erin out of the hole she was digging for herself.
He missed Nadia. He missed her jokes and her laughter and her insistence that he and Erin get together. He missed when he would come over to Erin's for a beer and instead find the two women studying, or when they would turn on a game and have to explain everything to Nadia because she had never really watched sports.
He wouldn't mind if Yates somehow "accidentally" died. Jay couldn't stand that he had hurt Erin, or that he had taken Nadia away from all of them.
As the guys left the apartment with Nellie, Jay wondered what the angle was here. Why was Yates leading them on a pointless chase? What else was he planning?
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Erin couldn't believe the connection. Yates was Nellie's brother and he was getting revenge on his mother for giving him up for adoption by killing all of these women. He was starting to be less calculated, as if he knew he wasn't getting out of this alive and that scared Erin. Who knew what he was capable of?
She paced around the locker room as the rest of the guys got ready to go to Yates' childhood home. Voight walked in and she immediately started to present her case.
"I had him. In the woods, I had him. If I didn't stop for that little girl, if I kept moving through that cabin, those four nurses would be alive right now."
"Erin. Don't do this to yourself." Hank interrupted.
"That's reason number two." Erin went over to her locker, opened it, and smacked her hand against the picture of her and Nadia she had hanging inside. "That's reason number one."
Hank shook his head. "You're not going out, Erin."
"Why not?"
"This is exactly what he wants, to get in your head and throw you off your game."
"How can I be off my game if you won't even let me in it?" she demanded.
"And how am I supposed to put you out there? You can't even keep your cool with me."
Erin shut her mouth and took a deep breath. She stared at him in disbelief that he was even considering not letting her go. "I wanna be the one to bring him in, Hank."
"You wanna be the one to get in a confrontation with him, that's not being good police."
"That is not where my head is at right now, you have my word."
"I don't believe you." She felt as if he had punched her in the stomach. "You're staying here." Hank walked away.
Erin slammed her locker door shut and fought the urge to hit it. She should be the one out there. How could she respect Hank as her sergeant if he wouldn't even let her do her job?
She knew that she was emotionally invested in this, but that made it so much easier to do the right thing. She knew she had to catch Yates and not let him get away again.
She followed Hank down the stairs to where the guys were getting ready. She stopped next to Olivia to watch the rest of them.
"Look, for what it's worth, if I was your sergeant, I would have done the same thing." She touched Erin's shoulder. "We'll get him."
Erin nodded her head. As much as she wanted to go, she trusted all of them. She trusted that they wouldn't stop until they had Yates and they were bringing him in.
She watched as everyone grabbed their gear and headed out of the garage. As Jay went to exit, he turned to look at her. He gave her a small, reassuring nod and then shut the door. She hoped that the next time she saw them, they had Yates.
But as soon as she walked upstairs, everything changed. Nellie came running to her with her phone, saying that a number was calling saying it was her mother's, but her mom wasn't making any calls. Erin accepted the Face Time and saw Yates sitting with his father.
With Mouse's help, it didn't take long to figure out Yates' actual location. Erin quickly told him she would meet him.
"…but come alone or there will be another body to add to the list."
Nine dead already.
There was no way she could have said no.
He ended the call and Erin made eye contact with Mouse. He didn't speak, but they both knew that she was going to that house and she was going to bring Yates in.
She jumped in her car and raced towards the address. As she drove, Voight began to speak to her on her radio.
"Stand down, you are not going in alone! You hear me? That's an order."
"He's gonna kill Michael Williams if I don't show up."
"That's what he wants you to think."
"34th and Sangamon, Hank. His childhood home. I'm almost there."
"34th, I'm five minutes away. Erin, you are not meeting him alone, you hear me?" she shook her head even though he couldn't see her. "Erin!"
"You know I can't do that." She shut her radio off as she pulled up outside of the house.
Erin walked up the steps to the house with her gun and flashlight raised. As she got closer and closer, she only had one regret. She wished that she had talked to Jay.
She was confident that she could handle Yates and get him under control, but there was always the chance that things could go wrong. She wished she had said she loved him one more time, just in case.
Erin didn't realize she was holding her breath until she heard a noise upstairs and it all came out in one big whoosh. She took a second to calm herself down before heading over to the stairs. It only took her a second to find Yates standing behind Michael Williams, who had a rope tied around his neck and was sitting in a chair right on the edge of a large hole in the decaying floorboards.
"Detective Lindsay, so good to see you again." Yates greeted.
She braced herself with her gun raised and aimed directly for his chest. "Let him go."
"Well I could, but I am the only thing holding him up." He leaned the chair down to emphasize his point, causing Michael to cry out.
"Let me call an ambulance for him." She grabbed her phone from her pocket. "Then it'll be just you and me. Just like you wanted."
Yates shook his head. "He'll be dead long before they get here. Put that away."
Not wanting to test him, Erin stuck her phone back into her coat. Yates started to lean the chair forward.
"Stop, stop." Erin put her hands up. She tucked her gun into her holster, her hand trembling as she held onto the handle. "This is it."
"Have a seat."
Erin walked to the rocking chair that sat on one of the only secure parts of the floor. She hesitantly sat down; she didn't really want to, but she couldn't risk Michael's life. She couldn't have another person's blood on her hands.
"Jillian Hale was a nursing student, but what she really wanted to be was a surgeon." Yates began. "Helpers. Do you know who suffers the most? Helpers, because right up until that moment when you snap their neck, they really believe in the goodness of people." Erin made eye contact with Michael and she saw the fear in his eyes. He really didn't think he was getting out of here. To be honest, Erin wasn't sure if he was either.
"She thought that I would spare her because she was three months pregnant." Yates continued. "But that…that is why I picked her. A pregnant nurse as my first victim…mmm. The symmetry. You did want this from the beginning, right Detective?" Erin felt sick to her stomach.
"And my first pair, ahhh, that…that was electric. Lisa and um, uh, Rebecca. They fought for each other so hard, but in the end," he started to push Michael's chair closer to the hole, "because, you know, you can keep a woman alive for days. Oh, suffering, it's such an underrated art, isn't it? But you know who suffered the most beautifully of them all?"
Erin knew what he was going to say before he even said it. She could have leapt forward and ripped his throat out.
Yates pulled out a picture of Erin and Nadia from his pocket. "Poor Nadia. Look! We are so similar. You and I, damaged by a terrible mother, a father who abandoned us when he could have saved us," he leaned Michael even closer to the hole, "and we tried to overcome, didn't we? To become healers. But turns out fixing people doesn't pave over what we're born with."
"Then what do you want?" Erin asked. "Why am I here?"
Yates turned his head to the side. "An execution always needs one thing. A witness." He shoved Michael's chair forward into the hole.
Erin jumped up, pulling her gun from her holster and aiming it at Yates. She fired.
"There's no saving people." Yates stated. She watched him pick up an icepick. "We're killers. And at the end of the day, what is more liberating than killing someone?" he pointed between his eyes. "Bad begets bad begets bad. And you, my lovely, you get to tell this story."
"Don't move, you hear me, stay where you are." Erin commanded as he moved closer and closer to her with his icepick raised.
"You write my name down in a police report, you talk to the press, you testify in court, singing the song of Gregory Williams Yates. Over and over and over."
He was so close now that she could almost reach out and touch him. "I said don't move."
"You put me away." Yates said. "Take me in. Take me. Take me!" he screamed and started to lunge forward.
Erin shot him before she even knew what happened. She felt all of the air leave her chest as she looked down through the hole where Yates' body laid. Her entire body shook as she stared at him.
Hank came into the room behind her and she turned to look at him, her mouth hanging open. She couldn't believe he was dead. Hank took her gun from her hand as she continued to stare down at Yates' body.
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As Jay arrived to Yates' childhood home, he didn't know what he would be walking into. He knew that Erin had gone alone and he knew she was okay from the information Voight had radioed to the rest of the team, but there were no other details.
Antonio put the car in park and Jay jumped out of the passenger's side door. He headed towards the house and saw Voight and Erin exiting at the same time.
He and Erin tried as hard as possible to be professional at work. Everyone knew about their relationship, but they were already both pretty private people, and then adding on the fact that they were partners, they didn't want to give anyone a reason to think their relationship would compromise their work. But right now, he didn't care about any of that.
She lifted her head up and they made eye contact. As they got closer, he could see that her hands were shaking and her face was pale. Once she was in his reach, he cupped her cheeks in his hands.
"How are you doing?"
She let out a shaky sigh. "I don't know." Erin moved his hands from her face and he started to prepare himself to argue with her on why she shouldn't push him away. But instead, she stepped forward into his arms and clung to him.
"It's okay." He reassured her. Jay pressed a kiss to the top of her head and held her tightly. He was grateful when he saw Voight and Antonio walk away.
"He's dead." Erin informed him. Her left ear was resting against his heart and he knew she was comforted by his steady heartbeat. He made sure to take even breaths so he didn't freak her out, even though he was worried about her.
"He deserves whatever he got."
"I shot him."
"You did what you had to do."
"He came at me first. He had an icepick. He said Nadia suffered the most out of all his victims."
Jay tightened his grip on her. "It's alright, Erin. It's over now. We got justice for Nadia."
Erin looked up at him and he saw the tears streaked down her cheeks. "Is it bad that I almost feel relieved that I was the one who killed him?"
"No, it's not bad at all." He put his hands on her shoulders and ran them down her arms until he could hold her hands. He squeezed them and leaned forward to kiss her forehead. "You did what needed to be done, for Nadia and for anyone else Yates hurt or could have hurt. Killing someone is never easy, but it's okay. We'll get through this together."
"Can we just go home?" she questioned.
"Yeah, let's talk to Voight."
Jay wrapped his arm around her shoulders as they headed over to their sergeant. Voight turned to look at them.
"You good, Erin?"
"I'm okay. Do you need anything from us? Can we go?"
"Go ahead, and take the day off tomorrow. You too, Halstead. You better take care of our girl."
"I will, sir." Jay promised. "Call if you need anything."
The two of them headed over to Erin's car. She wordlessly got into the passenger's seat and Jay didn't ask any questions as he silently went to the driver's side. It was a quiet drive until she broke the silence.
"He told me the whole story about his life. About his victims, of how Nadia suffered 'the most beautifully'. He wanted to die. I didn't want to give him the satisfaction. I watched him hang his own father, so when he came after me with that icepick…I panicked, Jay. I put a bullet through his chest and I stared through the hole in the ground at his body and I wanted to cry. I was so happy that he was finally gone and that there would be no more worries about the entire thing. But most of all, I wondered if Nadia would have been proud of me. I wondered if she would have judged me for ending Yates' life when I could have handcuffed him and brought him down to the station."
"She would have been proud." Jay said. "Nadia adored you, Erin. She practically worshipped the ground you walked on. You could have killed her puppy and she probably would have thought you had a good reason. She definitely would have been proud that you took a serial killer off the streets."
Erin sniffled slightly, and then she let out a loud sob. Jay was happy they had gotten to the apartment because he knew she needed him right now. He turned the car off and went around to her side of the car. As Erin's body was wracked with sobs, he eased her out of the vehicle and helped her inside. He unlocked the door to the apartment and led her to the couch.
Jay hung up his and Erin's jackets and as soon as he sat down, Erin crawled over so she was straddling his lap. She buried her face in the spot between his neck and shoulder. She pressed one gentle kiss there before closing her eyes. Her body still shook from the shock of the events of the day and her tears. Jay ran his hands up her back and rocked gently from side to side.
"It's okay, baby. I've got you." He whispered. "Just let it all out."
He didn't know how long he had held her before she fell asleep. Once she finally did, Jay gently lifted her into his arms and carried her to their bedroom.
He laid her on the bed and removed her shoes and socks first. Her pants were relatively easy to take off next. Her shirt was a little harder, but he managed to maneuver it. He grabbed one of his t-shirts and slid it over her head before getting himself ready for bed.
When he was finally finished, Jay turned off the lights and crawled into bed next to his girlfriend. She turned and curled up to his side instantly.
"I love you." He told her. "Whatever you need me to do, I'm here."
"I love you too." Erin whispered back before falling back into her sleep. As Jay watched her, he knew what he said was true. He would do absolutely anything to make sure Erin got over this.
Next up… O: Out of Time