Chapter 32 Settling In
Some hours later, hearing footsteps, Kara glanced at the clock on the Ready Room wall. Only one person she could think of would show up here at 04:00 am. Frak. She'd hoped to avoid him until the pilots' briefing. Of course, it's not like she had the vaguest idea when that was. Good excuse as any, she decided as an explanation for her presence.
Her eyes clung to Lee as, shuffling through a stack of papers, he made his slow way down to the podium. He obviously hadn't seen her. Kara took the opportunity to study him unobserved. The most prominent change was the weight gain. It didn't suit him, burying the gracefulness he had always moved with in the past. The rounded shoulders could be blamed on fatigue; she doubted that he'd had any sleep in the past forty-eight hours either. The loss of the Pegasus had to also be weighing him down.
Watching him run a hand through his hair, ruffling the longer locks, Kara poignantly recalled their night together on New Caprica. As she inhaled sharply in bitter regret at the cost of her actions, Lee must have heard her for he suddenly spun around. As she stood to reveal herself, an expression of elation crossed his face and was gone again so quickly that Kara wasn't sure that it had even been there as his brows lowered and his features settled into icy disdain.
"Thrace," he said, voice as chilled as his blue eyes.
Well, if she'd had any doubts about what type of reception she'd get from this quarter, it was smeared away by his greeting.
"Sir," she replied flatly, too little of Starbuck left to rise to his biting use of her last name.
They stared at each, separated by only fifteen feet physically and a vast gulf emotionally. She dropped her eyes first, looking at the fingers she was twisting together. It wasn't as if she had expected anything else from him. Her frak-up this time had destroyed even the tenuous friendship they'd maintained up until New Caprica. She certainly deserved any scorn he wanted to heap on her.
As he cleared his throat, she glanced up and saw him turn his back and continue to the raised platform and lay the papers on the podium. Without looking up he said, "Pilots' briefing will be at 08:00 this morning. If you're late, you'll spend the rest of the day in the brig. Dismissed."
She took a last moment to study his bent head, mourning all the little things that use to be between Starbuck and Apollo. Kara had royally screwed up even that relationship. With crossed arms, she hurried from the room; and if she stumbled a little, it was from eyes blurry from lack of sleep, not the tears she had to blink away.
By the time she reached the quartermaster's station, she'd managed to dredge up enough bitterness to sustain a characteristic Starbuck glower at the harassed Staff Sergeant behind the desk. The lean man peered up through smudged spectacles when Kara leaned forward on his desk.
"Thrace, Kara. Right…" He thumbed through the lists and tapped a forefinger on the sheet. Twisting slightly in his seat, he called over his shoulder to a youngster that couldn't have been older than thirteen. "T133B, Pauly," and gave a nod as the boy set aside the blankets he'd been stacking to hurry off.
Taking off his glasses, the man rubbed at them with the hem of his partly untucked BDU top. Once he had replaced them, he gave Starbuck a weary smile and said, "Glad ya made it back, Sir. Kinda late checking in. Got most everyone racked up last night." He pulled over another list, muttering over it before scratching a mark and returning his now somewhat nervous gaze to her. "Bout the only thing left in Pilot Country is in the overflow quarters. Mostly Pegasus and nuggets. Sorry can't getcha your old bunk back, Sir." He shrugged, though it looked a little stiff like he was afraid she'd let loose the infamous Starbuck temper on him at the news.
"It's ok, Sarge. Anything's better than where I've been," she assured the man, then wished she hadn't as speculation lifted his brows. Her own drew together in a frown that was sufficient to quell any questions he might have been about to ask. He silently slid the slip of paper with her rack & locker number on it across the desk then swiveled around as Pauly returned with a box clutched to his chest.
After reclaiming her few possessions and the standard-issue kit, Kara made her way to the assigned bunkroom. Exchanging only nods to the two Raptor pilots that were up and seated at the table in the room, she quietly stowed her gear, then sprawled across her bunk and closed the privacy curtain, not bothering to switch on the racklight.
She wasn't worried about falling asleep and missing the pilot briefing. Sleep was going to be elusive for the foreseeable future, that and eating. She wasn't hungry, not with the uneasy nausea in her stomach causing her lip to curl at the thought of trying to choke down anything. Rubbing at her eyes with thumb and forefinger, Kara tried to recall when she had last had a meal.
Breakfast yesterday with Leoben…
…and Kacey.