The next morning she woke up and the first thing that came to her mind was that she was pregnant. There was no dream, but only hard reality. She felt really lonely as she lay there in her bed thinking about the future. She convinced herself to get up and checked her phone. Sheldon sent her a text message.
Good morning Amy. I'm looking forward to tomorrow's date, I found out I'll take you to the auqarium again where we can play now a boyfriend girlfriend fish game. You still have to drive.
Date on Saturday, she almost forgot. The perfect occasion to tell him. She sent her quickly that she is okay with that and then got dressed to go to work. She also made call to her gynecologist to have an urgent appointment.
Fortunately work took her mind off of her troubles and she almost felt good as she sliced up monkey brains. That night was also girl's night in Pennys apartment and she wanted to cancel it, but she couldn't find any excuse good enough, so she just went there. She knew she will meet Sheldon since he was in the neighborhood but she figured she could act casual. But first of all she went to the gynecologist who confirmed her pregnancy. It was a really unpleasant visit.
As she arrived on the fourth floor he knocked on Sheldon's door first and Howard was the one opening it. Leonard gave her a quick questioning look as he noticed her. She shook her head but tried to smile.
Sheldon went to see her from the kitchen and gave her a quick kiss on the lips.
" Have a good evening, Dr Fowler!"
" You too, Dr Cooper!"
As she turned away from him, she realised that Penny and Bernadette were also there.
" Isn't this girls night? " she asked them.
" It is, but Bernie and I have an announcement to make so we wanted everyone in here. So attention, please!" Howard said and he stood next to Bernadette holding her hand.
" Bernie and I are expecting a baby. "
" Wow!"
" Congratulations! "
"Are you seriously kidding me? " Amy thought but didn't say out loud. She said congratulations and hugged Bernadette automatically but she didn't feel like herself. Her stomach has flipped and now she really considered if this was a nightmare.
" Yes, we were trying for a baby for a few months now, and finally I'm pregnant. " Said Bernie smiling.
Everybody seemed amazed by the news, but Sheldon. He just stood there.
" Now what Sheldon? Won't you say congratulation? " Howard asked provocatively
" I will. Congratulations to you. But also all forms of life are able procreate so it's not like that you need to have PhD for that. Oh wait, you don't. Bazinga. "
" Sheldon! " Bernadette's eyes were almost scary as she looked at him.
" Fine. So you are saying goodbye to your careers to take care of an inferior form of life. Well it's your decision. And congratulations that your genitals work. "
" Sheldon! " Penny and Leonard shouted at him at the same time. Leonard looked at Amy who looked like she is all about to cry again. She was staying for hearing the gang be amazed by the news and tried to act like she felt the same but after ten excrutiating minutes she headed to the bathroom.
She started to cry immediately as she locked the door but her tears never seemed to dry out after that. She tried to wash her face but it didn't help. She was lucky since the gang was so amused and no one missed her. Except someone.
knock knock knock "Amy"
knock knock knock "Amy"
knock knock knock "Amy"
" Amy, are you okay? "
" I am. " She tried to sound normal.
" Why are you in there so long? "
" It's nothing I just... Something got into my eye. " she came up with the lamest excuse ever, which was so cliche but she couldn't find an other.
" I can help you with that. "
" You shouldn't. I already got it out. I will be back in a mintue. "
" Are you sure? "
" Go away, Sheldon! " she said.
" Fine. " he answered.
After she washed her face again she got out. Only Leonard seemed to notice that she was not feeling well, Penny was still talking to Bernadette and Howard, with a big smile on her face. As Sheldon went to Raj and asked him about a work problem (which he found by the way really inappropiate this time) Leonard sat next to Amy.
" I see you're not okay. "
" Are you surprised? After what he just said. "
" Amy, he wasn't serious. He is just jealous that Howard was the first one to go to space. And now he is the first one to start a family. "
" Well, apparently there is nothing he should be jealous about. "
" But he doesn't know that."
" No, he doesn't. I wonder how happy he will be after he found out, our genitals work too. "
" Amy, please, give him a chance. He would never say things like that about his child or to you." he whispered.
" I hope you two are chichatting about what to get to my birthday. I'm hoping trains. " Sheldon interrupted.
" Yes. Sure. " she said a bit angrily
Penny meanwhile poured everyone a glass of champagne to toast to Bernie and Howard. Amy didn't know what to do since she couldn't drink alcohol, but if she refused it, there would be questions. Even Sheldon had a glass. She took the glass in her hand as she listened to Raj's toast and when they all said Cheers she pretended to drink. She tried to gave Leonard a look. Fortunately he noticed it and he quickly switched their glasses. His was already empty.
" Thank you." she mouthed to him silently.
The rest of the night was almost as painful as the first one. They finally went to Penny's apartment which made Amy's life a lot easier since she wanted to punch Sheldon so much in the face, and he had no idea why she was acting weird. Also she couldn't notice in time Penny opening an other bottle, so Leonard had to drink instead of her again, which made him clearly drunk.
" So how did you end up agreeing into having children? " Penny asked Bernadette.
" Yes, that's such a good question. Why? " asked Amy.
" Howard promised he'll be helping and maybe staying at home too. Also we have big family home and Stuart was moving out so we thought we maybe lonely there just the two of us. Also as you know we just finished a big project at work, so I thought the timing is right. "
" Good for you. " said Amy with some irony in her voice.
" I'm happy for you. " Penny smiled widely and she poured herself another glass of champagne.
" And how about you and Leonard? Don't you plan having kids someday? It would be fun to have kids together, you know, go to the playground together, get drunk together after we put them into some drug induced sleep. I'm just kidding. I mean who knows. " asked Bernadette.
Penny drunk all of her wine before she answered.
" Well, Leonard sure wants kids. Speaking about myself, I don't know. It sounds like a huge responsibility. You know I kind of have some commitment issues. But I'm sure he'll talk me into having kids someday. He already talked me into a lot of things. "
" Why don't you ask about me and Sheldon? " Amy turned to Bernadette.
" Why would I? You're not even married yet. I assumed it would be too soon for you. "
" Probably you're right. " Amy answered.
After that little conversation Penny got really drunk really fast and googled weird baby names and laughed at them. Bernadett giggled listening to her. Amy felt in like hell, like she wanted to shout at them to drop this topic immediately and for ever, but she couldn't. So she kept pretending to be happy but a little tired from work. At 10 pm. she told the girsl to call it a night and them got home. She was happy to leave the girls but also she couldn't stop thinking about the hopelessness of her own situation. As she was lying in her bed alone again her fears took over her.
She had a still small voice in her head whispering to her that she is better off without this and she should "take care" of the situation on her own without telling anyone anything. It was a frightening thought. She wasn't religious or anything and she believed that women could and should make choices about their bodies, still she never imagined herself considering an abortion. She experienced extreme guilt but she couldn't get that thought out of her head. Now, should her mother see her. There is no sin closet big or small enough to fit her. She thought bitterly.
She tried to think rationally. Sheldon would never ever forgive her if she got an abortion without him knowing. Also she wasn't a good liar and she never intended to lie Sheldon for a lifetime. Also she already told Leonard so this just didn't made any sense at all. There was no other rational choice but to tell it to Sheldon the next day and hopefully figure everything out together. She was shaking thinking about this.
Sheldon didn't like babies. Changes. Big emotional responsibilities. Would he feel the same aversion to touch his child like he has towards anything else? Will it take him years or at least months to hold his kid, like it took for him to get intimate with her, Amy? How would he deal with diapers and burping? A baby won't sleep or eat or defacate at a scheduled time.
And how about after that? What if their baby turns out not as brilliant as they are? Would Sheldon still love her or him? IQ had genetical and environmental factors, but two smart people can have an average IQ child as well. How would he react to that? He loves being intellectually superior and she was sure Sheldon only loved her because of her IQ. And what if he or she will actually be really supersmart. Will their child get beaten up and bullied at school her entire childhood like she and Sheldon was? How could either of us put up with that?
Amy knew in her heart that Sheldon was a good man, all in all, and would never want to hurt her or possibly her child. But this was not so simple. He was a long way from being ideal father-material and they had only months to get there. Amy knew this situation will make him freak out, as it made her freak out as well. The only question was would they be able to get it right together.
So this is my second chapter, I decided to put it here to see what happens. I'm looking forward to reviews. And get yourself ready, because in the next one she will tell Sheldon the big news finally.