Thank you guys again for your support, your reviews still mean a lot to me. So here it is my next chapter, the thought of publishing it today made Monday a better place for me :)
Penny spent the rest of the weekend with Amy. They talked a lot, they watched movies and Penny talked her friend into go for a walk on Sunday afternoon. Penny made sure Amy would eat and sleep. But Monday came quickly and they all had to go back to work. Penny offered Amy to call in sick and have an other day together, but Amy refused it. She wanted to do something to take his mind off of Sheldon.
Monday was almost bearable, the brains remained the same as usual and she was happy with the records so far. After going home to the empty apartment Monday felt a lot more terrible, and she knew she could call Penny again but she didn't want to rely on her best friend this much. She barely slept, but cried over the night.
In the morning she went to work without breakfast, but Raj came to visit her in her lab. The official version to her story was: she and Sheldon had a huge fight which made Sheldon run away. Raj brought her some amazing home-made breakfast as a consolation prize, expressed his sympathies, and then they talked a little about his relationship.
Two days later she still haven't heard anything about Sheldon, but Bernadette called her.
" Hi Amy, Penny is kind of busy with work, but I made myself a long lunch break, so I'm asking, will you go shopping with me? "
" Shopping? Good idea, I saw really pretty shoes the other day. I have to try them on. " she was almost surprised how excited could she sounded after all.
" Well. I wanted to shop for baby clothes. You know if it's up to Howard everything our child would wear would be little superhero costumes. "
" Uh. Well. "
" Please. I really don't want to go alone. And you seemed to be free. " she begged in a cute tone.
" I... I don't know. "
" Come on, why not? "
Amy could name some really good reasons to that question btu she decided not to. So she agreed to go baby dress shopping with Bernadette. The store were full of pregnant woman and all of them seemed much happier then she was. She wanted not to take a look at anything so she basically played with her phone, but still too many things came to her mind. Now she was the one who wanted to run away. After a long hour Bernadette finally payed for what she purchased and she could go back to work. She spent the afternoon crying in her lab. She was so desperate she sent a text message to Sheldon.
" Where are you? I'm really mad at you but I need you. Please, come back. I can't do this all alone. "
But he didn't answer. She spent the day checking her phone every five minutes but there was still no answer. After work she went home, crawled into her bed and called in sick for the next day. She couldn't fell asleep for hours so she had nothing but her hopeless and depressing thoughts.
The next day she woke up around noon. She barely realised the last meal she had was already a day ago – a quick lunch at the mall wit Bernadette. She looked into a mirror: her nose was red, her eyes looked empty, her hair was greasy. She was a mess. This can't go on like this. She knew she had to stop, so first of all she texted Penny to come over when she has time.
Penny was there around 3 p.m. and she hugged her by the time she saw how bad and pale she looked.
" Did anything happen? " she asked.
" Yes. I went to the baby store with Bernadette and it was hell. After that I texted Sheldon that I miserably need him but he didn't even answer. I can't do this, Penny. " Amy shook her head sadly.
" You could have called earlier. "
" No, I'm a grown woman, I should be able to take care of myself. Penny... I think I want to have an abortion. " she finally said it out loud. It sounded horrible but there it was. Her decision.
" Oh, sweetie. I'm sorry. Are you sure, that's what you want? "
" I am. I feel so bad. I... I think I'd ruin my child's life and mine too. "
" Well, Amy, I'm sorry." Penny looked worried.
" I know. I called you here... Because I need some support. I'm about to call my doctor for an appointment. "
" Ah. Do you want me to do the call to get you an appointment? " Penny offered.
" No, I can do this. Just please be here with me. "
" I will. " she promised.
...
Sheldon was lying in an old bed in his Meemaw's house. He flew from Salt Lake City to Texas as he wanted to have some emotional support. He wasn't able to go home to his mother since she feared her reaction the most. So she asked Meemaw to keep his visit a secret. He spent his days lying in bed and watching his old Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles VHSs on Meemaw's old VCR. Meemaw tried to start several conversations with him since he arrived but he kindly refused everytime. Then Amy's text came and he felt like the worst man ever. He thought about getting back to her immediately but he couldn't. He was not ready to face the situation and was afraid he will run away again. He felt like the biggest coward ever. He didn't know how to answer her. " I'm sorry, I can't, but I'll be back, I promise. " It seemed worse than not answering at all so he didn't. At the same time he stopped watching old cartoons, since he felt like he had to do something, so he started to clean Meemaw's house instead. It helped him focus and the attic was full of old gadgets so he had plenty of work to do.
After three days of obsessive cleaning, which he performed without getting any sleep, Meemaw's patience finally came to an end.
" Moonpie, I'm always happy to see you, but enough is enough. I don't want a clean house. I want my grandchild. So you better tell me now what is going on. " she said as Sheldon was sitting on the floor in the living room catalogueing some old books.
" I'm so sorry, Meemaw, but I can't tell you this. " he answered.
" Fine. Maybe I could also ask your friends. I really don't like to go behind your back, but I'm worried about you Moonpie. So I'll may ask Leonard, or that cute little girl you're about to propose to. "
" No, not her! " he shouted.
" So is this about the two of you? Did she broke up with you again? "
" No, she didn't. But I'm sure she will. " he murmured the last sentence.
" Why would she? What did you do, Moonpie? " she inuired again.
" Meemaw, you'll hate me if I told you. " Sheldon felt ashamed.
" Moonpie, I would never hate you, no matter what. Please tell me. You can't stay here forever. You know, you have a life on the West Coast. "
" I left her alone when she needed me. " he told.
" Why did she need you? She seems like a pretty strong woman. Did something happen? "
" She is a strong woman. Meemaw, Amy is pregnant. " he finally said.
" Oh, Shelly that's really wonderful news. Your sister already made me a Nana, but now I'll have another great grandchild. " Meemaw seemed happy.
" But, Meemaw, I left her when she told me. I knocked her up and left her. It was just too much. You know me, I can get overwhelmed so easily and this is a huge change. So I ran away." he tried to explain himself to her.
" You have to go back to her, you know that, don't you? "
" But Meemaw, could you ever imagine me as a dad? I think I'll be the worse father ever. I ran away. What kind of man does such thing? "
" Oh, Moonpie, if you knew... " Meemaw laughed. "When I announced my first pregnancy to your Pop-Pop he kind of did the same. There were no frequent planes back then, so he could only drive his old bycicle to get away from me. I went after him, and found him two days later drunk as hell in a pub in Richwood. And we were already married back then. I was mad at him but eventually I had to forgive him. And as you must remember him, he was a wonderful a father and and later grandfather. Running away means being afraid from the big responsibilty that comes with a child but also means knowing that it's a big responsibility. "
" Did that really happen? I would have never guessed. " Sheldon was surprised.
" You must have inherited this coping method from him. But you should go back to that girl. You better start packing. I'll call you a cab. "
" Thank you Meemaw."
...
Penny came home around 10. pm. after spending the evening with Amy supporting her. Leonard was already waiting her with a meal.
" So how is she doing? " he asked.
" Not good. She decided to have an abortion. "
" Really? " he asked surprised.
" Yes, but why are you this surprised? It seems a logical choice to me. "
" I guess I just never thought she was the kind of woman who has an abortion. "
Penny knew the topic made her sensitive, but she couldn't keep it in, she asked Leonard angrily:
" Why? What kind of women do have abortion? "
" Well you know... The ones who are helpless and... "
" And? " she questioned.
" I don't know. You seem mad. Did I do anything? "
" No, of course not, I just... I think I'm overreacting it. I just want to support Amy's decision. "
" And what about Sheldon? "
" Well, he doesn't deserve to have any opinion. " she said.
" He is the father. It was really childlish of him that he ran away, but someday he'll be back. "
" Yes. Someday. I can't believe you're still protecting him after all he had done. "
" He is our friend. " he stated quietly.
" Well I don't think he is my friend anymore. " Penny answered.
" You seem pretty upset. "
" Leonard... " Penny took a deep breath. " I had an abortion too. "
" What? When? Was it my child? " Leonard panicked.
" No! God no! I was nineteen. In Omaha. Had drunk sex at a party, didn't use protection. I didn't know what else to do. That was what my parents wanted... "
" Oh Penny, why have you never told me? "
" I don't know. I guess I was ashamed. Are you mad at me? "
" Actually I am a little bit. But I still love you. And I'm sorry you had to get through this. " he said.
Penny hugged him. " You are the best husband. " she whispered in his ear.
...
knock knock knock "Amy"
knock knock knock "Amy"
knock knock knock "Amy"
It was a Sunday evening and Amy was watching Downtown Abbey sitting on her couch with a bag of doritos in her lap, already in her pijamas. It was Sheldon's knocking. Amy froze. She had played with the idea not to answer the door but she was not sure what would Sheldon do next. He probably would find her anytime soon, since they both worked at Caltech. And maybe it would be easier to deal with him here and not there in front of everyone who doesn't even know about her pregnancy. She turned her TV off, and put the doritos in the kitchen. Then he opened the door.
" Hello. " she said. " Come in "
Sheldon nodded, stepped in and watched her closing the door.
" Why did you came here? " she asked. She felt anger and disappointment looking at him.
Sheldon gave her a gentle smile as he stepped closer to her and reached out for her to hug her.
" Amy, are you all right? "
Amy pulled him off.
" I am. But it has nothing to do with you. "
" Please, Amy. I'm sorry. Really terribly sorry. I shouldn't have left you alone. But I made up my mind. "
" Oh really? Great Sheldon Cooper finally honores me with his wonderful ideas about my pregnancy? " she asked sarcastically.
" Amy, did you forget that I love you? Listen to me, please."
" No! You listen to me! You left me alone for more than a week. You didn't even contact me or answered my message. You are immature and selfish. You keep repeating you love me but that's not even true. All you do is hurt me, than when I'm fed up with your shit, you ran here and try to get it right by showing some affection towards me, just not to lose the chance to hurt me again. I'm done with you. Whatever you want to say, I'm not interested anymore. I never could trust you ever again. "
" Amy, I don't want to hurt you. I never wanted to hurt you. " he whispered.
" Well you did. Now, go away. " she was determined.
" Amy, let me talk to you, please. " Sheldon begged.
This was a hard situation, he really lost his trust but hearing him beg like that melted her heart so easily. But what if they got back together? Does she really want to live a life where she is always worried that he will run away the moment anything bad happens? This way the question was simple.
" You had the chance. " she said coldly.
Sheldon pulled her close again.
" Let me go! " she shouted at him immediately.
Sheldon let her go. Tears filled his eyes. " But what about the pregnancy? "
" That's none of your concern anymore. " she said with her voice trembling.
" Amy, that's my child too. "
" I... I decided to have an abortion. " she stated with a little insecurity.
" You did? " Sheldon sounded surprised. Wasn't he considering the same?
" Yes, the surgery is already scheduled, so you have nothing to worry about. "
" Amy... Are you sure? " He asked still looking surprised.
" We would make terrible parents. " she didn't anwer directly. She couldn't. She made her choice but how could anyone be ever sure of such a thing? "And apparently our relationship had its own problems too. Plus we both like to focus on our careers. Now, please go. "
Sheldon finally nodded with a painful look and went away. Amy locked the door and started crying.
So guess what guys, my next chapter is actually ready, and I barely can keep myself from uploading it right now, because I hate to leave you like this. Please leave a review and expect an early update ;)