Hello friends!
Other than this very short chapter I have no idea when I will update, but it regrettably will not be this weekend. I have some stuff going on, but I will update as soon as I can!
That being said, what do you want to happen with this story? I, of course ,have a plan for where it's going, but love your feedback and ideas! So review and let me know what YOU want to happen, and maybe I can add in a bit just for you :)
Chapter 15:
Avery's POV:
When I awoke Friday morning I was confused, unsure of where I even was. Groggily, I looked around me at my surroundings only to find that I was in our family room. I was too high up to have been on the floor, so I was probably on the couch. But why on Earth wasn't I in my bed?
Oh.
Suddenly I remembered the events of the last few days. The reason I'd been too scared to sleep alone, and the reason I'd feared for not only the safety of my kids but for my own safety. That thing that somehow still managed to plunge my whole body in icy fear. That damn letter. I could remember every word, every letter, and every stupid thing it said:
I will never forget the way you looked at me when we met. As soon as I found you, I knew you were perfect. Those other women couldn't be there for me like I know you will be. I can't wait another moment until we're finally together. I promise it will be soon love.
No one will keep us apart.
Shivering, I tried to sit up and clear my head, but found that there was something heavy preventing me from doing so. I turned to see what was blocking my way, and I saw Spencer's peacefully sleeping face.
Oh.
Just as suddenly as I'd recalled the letter, I remembered the reason I was still curled up on this couch. Spencer's arms were what prevented me from getting up; they were still wrapped around my waist. Like he was still trying to protect me, even though he was sound asleep. I grinned and couldn't help but snuggle closer to him, just for a little while, breathing in his comforting scent. As I tightened my grip, he silently did the same. I stayed for a while, safe and happy in his arms. I wondered what it was about him that had made me fall so hard, so fast. I mean I'd gone from a twenty year old with little to no dating history, to a twenty something curled up on the couch with her boyfriend.
Was that what he was? My boyfriend? Last night after our kiss Spencer and I had simply watched the movie, and then fallen asleep in each other's arms. We'd never really discussed what it'd meant for either of us, nor what we were. Moreover, I didn't know what I even wanted us to be. Spencer made me feel so safe, so happy, but I wasn't sure if I was comfortable with how fast we were moving. I never thought a week ago that I'd be in this position, but here I was. And I was damn comfortable. Was this moving too fast? Did I even care if it was? At present I could say definitely not; how could I complain about anything with this wonderful man holding me close?
As I heard Amelia's cries from upstairs, I realized where we were. We were on Arrow's couch; surely if I'd had doubts about how quickly Spencer and I were moving he must as well. Best he didn't find us curled up like this. I slowly removed Spencer's arms from my waist, and climbed off the couch. He grumbled a little before turning over a bit and falling back to sleep. I giggled quietly before running up the stairs and grabbing Amelia out of her crib. I smiled at her, and began talking to her soothingly to calm her troubled cries. After going through our morning routine and checking on the still sleeping boys, I headed down the stairs with the intention of making Amelia's morning bottle and me some coffee. To my surprise, JJ occupied the couch where Spencer once laid. Raising an eyebrow, I silently asked her what was going on.
"Hey Av. Sorry to barge in, but the team needed Spencer for something. I'd just dropped Henry off at school so I decided I should come stay with you instead", she said smiling warmly. I felt my face drop when I realized that Spencer was gone, but quickly replaced it with a smile. It wasn't JJ's fault that Spencer had left, and it wasn't his fault that he'd had to go without saying goodbye, right? Surely he hadn't just left because he didn't want to talk about last night. No, he wouldn't do that. Would he?
"I was just about to make myself some coffee, care to join?" I said brightly to JJ, trying to shake thoughts of Spencer away. She agreed and we headed into the kitchen. Spencer would not leave quickly to avoid talking to me, would he?
SPENCERAVERYSPENCERAVERYSPENCERAVERYSPENCERAVERYSPENCERAVERYSPENCERAVERYSPENCER
After a pleasant morning with JJ and the kids, she insisted we head over to the BAU. Apparently the team had some more questions for me about Sam. I'd been the one she was closest to me in the shelter, and she'd been the last one to receive letters from the guy who killed her. The guy who was now apparently sending me letters. As we piled in the car I wondered if I was going to end up like Sam; dead, abandoned by the man who was apparently obsessed with me. I shuddered again, and wondered what would happen to my kids when I was gone. Arrow was great, but he was gone for work a lot. He said himself that Haley's sister had watched Jack quite a bit before I came along. Trouble was my kids were of no concern to her. Where would they go? I was never, ever going to leave them. Spencer was right, this guy messed with the wrong girl.
"What are you thinking about", JJ asked softly. I looked at her and wondered what to say, should I let her know what I was worrying about? I wasn't sure she wanted to hear my morbid thoughts. Suddenly, I thought of a question that'd been practically burning my mind all morning. I couldn't help but ask JJ, I trusted her. Of all the team members, excluding Spencer and Arrow, I'd spent the most time with JJ. Each day she came and drove us all to my work, and in that time we spent in the car we'd talked about anything and everything. She trusted me with Henry, and I told her whatever was on my mind.
"How well do you know Spencer?" I started. JJ looked at me curiously before she replied.
"As well as anyone could I suppose? Why do you ask?" she said. I steadied myself, taking a deep breath.
"Well, we kissed last night and promise that's all we did, but I don't know it seems fast, probably cause it is too fast. I wasn't unsure about it then, but I'm wondering now if I did let things happen too fast, but I really like him. But he left so quickly this morning, maybe he's thinking the same thing I am. Which would really be awful, because clearly I do not know what I want", I rambled all at once.
JJ parked the car and turned to me, her face concerned, but she was smirking all the same.
"I'd like to think there was a question in there somewhere, but it all came out so fast that I can't be sure", she said, laughing a little. I scowled at her, and she laughed a little more.
"Well geez J. Kick a girl while she's down why don'tcha", I grumbled. She smiled sympathetically at me.
"Sorry sweetie, but it was just too easy" she replied, seemingly genuinely. "As for you and Reid, I personally think that you guys are perfect for each other. And I also think you're a smart girl and that you should follow your gut. If you think things are going too fast, slow it down. Reid is the sweetest man on the planet; trust me when I say that he will go along with whatever you want", she finished softly. I smiled. She was right. Maybe I did need to slow down.
"Thanks JJ", I said, gratefulness saturating my voice. I leaned across the center console and hugged her gently.
"Of course", she said smiling. We both got out of the car, grabbing the kids and heading inside. She bumped my shoulder with hers as we entered the BAU, smirking widely.
"So you kissed Spencer?" she practically squealed. I rolled my eyes and she laughed as we walked over to Arrow's office.
SPENCERAVERYSPENCERAVERYSPENCERAVERSPENCERAVERSPENCERAVERYSPENCERAVERYSPENCER
After I'd gotten the kids settled in, JJ ushered me to the conference room I'd sat in yesterday. I waved to the team members present. Arrow sat near the head of the table, looking like he hadn't slept in days. Derek and Prentiss sat on one side, looking tired but not as exhausted. Spencer and Rossi sat on the other side, Spencer looking down at some kind of paper.
"Hey all", I said as perky as I could manage under the circumstances.
"Hey mama", Morgan answered at the same time that Emily and Arrow said "Morning Avery". Spencer still kept his head down, searching through his stack of papers. I felt my stomach drop; he didn't even acknowledge that I'd even gotten here. I passed the empty chair to his right, and sat myself at the other end of the table, and JJ filled the empty chair to his right. I folded my arms over my chest, looking everywhere but at Spencer.
"Alright guys, JJ said you have questions. So hit me". Rossi looked directly at me, clearing his throat.
"Avery early on in this investigation we noticed that each of the women… involved had tattooed skin, long hair, and light skin. Clearly you fit all those parameters, but we've began to think some of those tattoos may fit a certain pattern as well. We need you to explain each of your tattoos with us, and probably take pictures of them as well", he said. I nodded.
"Uh well I only have 5", I started. Emily's eyes bugged out, and Morgan scoffed.
"Only?" he questioned. I stuck my tongue out at him, and he chuckled. Arrow frowned.
"Avery, Derek, please stay focused", he said, rubbing his temples. I looked sympathetically at him before continuing.
"Sorry Arrow. So as I said, I have 5. On my foot I have an anchor with a heart incorporated. Nothing special about that really, just a popular Christian symbol for faith, strength, and hope. On my calf, I have a ribbon made out of some words. It's got different colors and fonts; it's for all the people that I'd ever known that had cancer. Each color is for a different person. Green is repeated 3 times, for my dad. On my ribs I have "Strength of the World is on my side" in cursive with a swallow. That was my first, my best friend has the matching "Strength of the World is on my Shoulder". She left the state when we were 17, she moved cross country and I haven't seen her since. I have Winnie the Pooh tattooed on my shoulder blade. It was my dad's favorite movie. He and I watched the VHS so many times the tape broke. My last one is the one you all see every day. The roses on my arm are just there because I think they're beautiful. Two of them have Henry and Amelia's names and birthdays inside the petals", I explained. They all listened with a sort of intensity that made me feel sort of nervous, on display. Sometime during my little speech Spencer had looked up and locked his eyes on me with an expression that I couldn't place. I broke eye contact with him and turned to Rossi.
"Does that help?" I asked. Rossi nodded.
"Perfect kiddo", he agreed.
"Why did you need to know? What tattoos did the other girls have?" I questioned. JJ took a bunch of pictures out of a file she was holding and slid them over to me. I looked them over for a while as the rest of the team talked quietly. I was acutely aware that Spencer's eyes were still on me the whole time, but I ignored him and studied the pictures. After a while, I frowned.
"Hey guys?" I questioned quietly. They all turned and paused their conversations. "I'm no profiler, but I think there's definitely a pattern here". They all looked at me questioningly.
"What is it mama?" Morgan said.
"Each of us has someone else's names, but not just that we have their birthdays too. Clearly we all have children. Not only that, but we each have some sort of overt symbol of Christianity", I said.
"You're right. We caught on to that last night, but we just wanted to be sure you fit the profile", Prentiss said. I frowned. I was no profile. I was a person.
"Hmmp. Glad I could help. I'm gonna go get some water and check on the kids", I said, quickly standing up and heading out the door before anyone could say anything. I could hear JJ call after me, but I continued on into the hallway anyways. Emily's words struck a nerve in me; I was no profile, and I wasn't a victim either. I hated that that was the way they saw me.
Not really wanting to face the boys when I was upset, I avoided Arrow's office. I walked into the break room and poured myself some coffee. As I stirred in my copious amounts of sugar and cream, I felt someone come up behind me and stop. Figuring JJ had run out after me, I sighed and spoke quickly.
"Sorry JJ, I just needed some air. Things just got a little too real, ya know", I said turning around. To my complete surprise JJ was not standing in front of me, but a very bashful looking Spencer. He had his hands in his pockets, and he was looking like he'd prefer to just run the other way. He cleared his throat nervously and shifted his weight from side to side. He just looked so adorably nervous, I couldn't help but give him a small smile of reassurance. Smiling a little bit at me, and looking more confident than when I'd first turned. He took a step closer to me, looking down at me with a look that made my knees go weak and said softly,
"I know".