Written In The Body

Poetheather

A/N: There will be a number of mature things discussed including torture, same sex relationships, violence and others… you have been warned.

A/N 2: Any time I reach a milestone in this story (100 of most anything) you guys get an extra chapter. You will also get one for Valentine's day, just saying.

This is a work of fiction using the characters created by J.K. Rowling. They are not used with her permission. All actions follow the events of book seven of the series, excluding the epilogue. Any similarity between any person living or dead is purely coincidental and unintentional. If you happen to find your life reflected in this piece I'll be impressed.

Eight

The next few weeks were quite enjoyable. The girls were able to do whatever they wanted pretty much, such as watching all kinds of movies, touring more of muggle London, going to one of the theme parks near London for a day, but mostly just getting to spend time with each other without the stress of school or anyone else butting in all the time as was the norm at the Burrow. It was lovely. This allowed Ginny to let down her walls more and cry her grief over Fred, Harry and the others out and it let Hermione form a much tighter bond with her best female friend. Without the interruption of the boys at the Burrow it made that process so much easier.

That morning as they came downstairs chattering away about their plans for the day, they noticed an owl with two letters tied to its leg taping on the glass of the back door. Hermione went over and opened the door, plainly curious, as it was not Perdita. The owl waited patiently for her to untie the letters and then flew off, not even bothering to wait around for an owl treat. Hermione grinned when she saw the writing on them.

Ginny was helping set the table while Mrs. Granger was cooking breakfast and was only able to see this all transpire out of the corner of her eye as Hermione walked back in. "What was that about?"

"Our Hogwarts letters have arrived." She replied, handing Ginny's letter over. "Here's yours."

Hermione opened her own letter and pulled it out and something else fell out into her palm. She looked at it in surprise and her eyes widened in recognition. There was simply no way she was seeing what she was actually seeing. This had to be some sort of mistake. Was this even real?

"Yes! I made Quidditch Captain!" crowed Ginny, holding out her badge. "Hermione, look."

"Congratulations Ginny." said Mr. Granger as he came over to the table. "I am sure you will be great at that."

"Thank you. I will certainly try my hardest. Hermione what do you think? Hermione?" Ginny moved closer to her and looked a bit confused as Hermione was not reacting to what was being said.

Hermione meanwhile, had sat on her chair staring at the badge she held in her hand. Part of her was immensely proud to see it, proud of what it represented and all the work she had done over the years to obtain it and a part of her was unsure if she even wanted this honor, as she was not even sure if she was that girl anymore. Ginny had made sure she knew the positives of the position but this was still… was this even something she wanted anymore? She honestly didn't know and could only stare in disbelief.

Ginny looked over her shoulder and into her cupped hands and shouted again, hugging the stunned girl excitedly. "Yes! Head Girl! Yes! You are incredible Hermione! I knew you would get it!"

"Head Girl? Well done Hermione." said her father, clearly proud of his daughter's accomplishment. He smiled broadly at her. He seemed even prouder of her now than she was when she had become a Prefect.

Her mother called out from the kitchen, as she probably couldn't hear things clearly in there as she was preparing breakfast. "What was that?"

"Our daughter has been made Head Girl of Hogwarts." called out her father, raising his voice loud enough to really carry.

"Really? Oh, I am so proud of you Hermione." called out her mother.

"I'm Head Girl? Really?" Hermione was still in a bit of a daze. It really did not seem all that real to her. Sure she had been trying for this her whole school career, but after the last year she had honestly given up on this dream to focus instead on far more important things, like staying alive and trying to kill a madman. Even with the badge in her hand it was hard to believe that this was real.

"Yes really. Oh Hermione, you will be absolutely brilliant at it like you are at everything else. I can't wait to tell my mother. She will be so excited for you." Ginny said, needing to hug her again. She was being overly bouncy in her excitement, reminding Hermione a little of Tigger.

"Well, we can go back to your house after breakfast if you want. That way you can let them know about all of this. You will only be returning a day or two early." said Hermione.

Ginny looked conflicted, biting her bottom lip in thought. Hermione started laughing, rolling her eyes at the girl. "Honestly Ginevra, do you really want to watch Romeo+Juliet again?"

"What? I like it. I have never seen anything like it before and it really is amazing. Thosee visuals are stunning and… and… and… shut up." Ginny was blushing and looking down at the carpet, fidgeting a little. It was kind of adorable.

Hermione got up, snickering to herself and headed in to help her mom bring in the food. She came in carrying plates of strawberry and cream crepes for her and Ginny. Once the rest of the food was there and everyone had their meals, they all tucked into their breakfasts. Ginny moaned happily when she took a bite and said, "Mrs. Granger, these are amazing. Thank you for making them. You will have to tell me how you make these some time."

Mrs. Granger smiled, cutting a piece of her own crepe covered with powdered sugar and honey butter, "Thank you Ginny. I would be happy to."

"Oh my mother would be so jealous of these." That comment got Hermione to giggle which resulted in both girls laughing for a bit. The Grangers smiled as it had been explained to them how much Mrs. Weasley loved to cook and feed anybody who got even remotely close to her.

Once they finished, Ginny went to Hermione's room and packed her things, looking forward to sharing her big news with the family. Hermione grinned, actually looking forward to seeing what Mrs. Weasley thought of her becoming Head Girl as well. That should be a good deal of fun. They really were a second family for her and their opinions did matter to her a lot. She hoped that they would be as proud of her as her own parents were.

Ginny walked into the room with her bag, smiling broadly. "I guess I'll go. But can I come back to visit again before we leave for school? This was so much fun I want to do it again."

Hermione turned to look at her mother who smiled and nodded her head. Hermione grinned happily and Ginny bounced a little in excitement. This really was turning out to be an excellent summer, despite all the horror that led up to it. It was the perfect thing to help get over the pain of the war. "How about the week between Harry's and your birthday?"

"That sounds fun. I am sure Mom will be glad to have me out of the house around then to make her planning easier. Then I can come home and help clean the house the day before and get everything ready." Ginny frowned a little shaking her head. "Oh well, at least I get to spend more time with you."

"Yes. It'll be wonderful. I'll be back in a little bit mom." said Hermione, taking Ginny's hand.

"Okay. Be safe."

Hermione smiled and disapparated the two of them to the Burrow, just outside the ward line. Ginny and she walked into the house, laughing about something and Mrs. Weasley turned from where she was at the sink, clearly working on the breakfast dishes. She smiled at the girls, dried her hands and hustled over to hug her daughter first and then Hermione. "How are you girls? Did you have a good visit Ginny?"

"It was brilliant Mum. It was exactly what I needed. Thank you for letting me go. Oh, I also have some excellent news." Ginny said, rocking back and forth.

"What?" Molly seemed interested, smiling at Ginny's renewed energy.

"I got my Hogwarts letter this morning." Hermione thought that it was cute to see how Ginny was about to burst as she slowly let the news out piece by piece.

"You did? What's so excellent about that?" It was clear that Mrs. Weasley was somewhat confounded by what Ginny was saying. She looked between the two girls for an answer.

"I'm the new Gryffindor Quidditch Captain." Ginny said with a broad grin.

"Oh Ginevra, congratulations." Molly pulled her daughter into her arms again. "That is wonderful. I am so proud of you. Oh my little girl, Quidditch Captain."

"And guess what else?" teased Ginny, playfully stretching this out.

"There's more?" Mrs. Weasley was rather surprised at that notion.

"Oh yes Mum, there is more. It seems as if our dear little Hermione here is going to be Head Girl." Ginny grinned and winked at the bushy haired girl who blushed slightly.

Molly snapped her head over and looked at Hermione. "Is it true?"

"Yes Mrs. Weasley, I'm going to be Head Girl." said Hermione with a growing grin of her own. This did feel good to be included in this excitement.

She got pulled into one of Molly's near bone crushing hugs. "Oh, I am so proud of both you girls. After all of this, for you… for both of you to…"

Molly turned and sat heavily at the kitchen table, tears falling. She grabbed a dishtowel from her apron and dabbed at them. Ginny rushed over, taking one of her mother's hands in concern. "Mum what's wrong?"

"It's just that… with everything that has happened, this is finally some good news for all of us. I am happy for you girls, I really am, but it makes me think about all we have lost as well." Molly said with a sigh. Straightening up a little she said, "Perhaps a cup of tea will help soothe me."

"Certainly mum." Ginny went over to the stove and started working there, prepping the cup for her mother.

Hermione stood there a bit awkwardly, unsure of what to do right then. Nothing she had learned had prepared her to deal with this sort of thing. Molly smiled at her and stretched out a hand and said, "It's alright Hermione. I was just overcome. Take no heed of it. It's been a rough year."

Hermione took the older woman's hand and squeezed it. "Alright Mrs. Weasley, I hope you feel better soon. I should be going. I told my mother I would be back soon."

"Thank you Hermione. Take care of yourself. I will see you at Harry's party won't I?" asked Molly.

"Absolutely. I wouldn't miss it for anything. Good bye Ginny." Hermione said as she got ready to head home.

Ginny came over and set down the cup of tea in front of her mother. She walked around the table and hugged Hermione, saying, "Thank you for a great break from things. Good bye 'mione. See you soon."

Hermione apparated back home, appearing in her bedroom, so as not to shock her parents with the noise and her sudden appearance. She walked into the living room, calling out, "I'm home."

Her mother looked up from what she was reading and smiled, "That was certainly quick."

"I just dropped her off and we told Mrs. Weasley the news. That was all we did. There were hugs all around. She was very excited for the both of us." Hermione smiled fondly as she recalled everything as she told her mother. It still made her feel all warm inside.

"Well it is exciting news. I am happy for the both of you. It was nice to have Ginny over. She is very polite and helpful and really seemed to enjoy being here. She is certainly much nicer than Ron I must say. I can definitely see why you really like her." Her mother went back to her reading and thus missed the effect that her off the cuff comment had on her daughter.

Hermione froze when her mother said that as the last sentence ran through her brain several times, each time slightly different words in the sentence were emphasized. She really liked Ginny? Not just liked her but really liked her. Liked her so much that it was plainly obvious to others? That was what her mother said and her mother was not known for misspeaking or hyperbole of any sort. What she had said was a fundamentally different statement than 'I can see why you like her'. That one word addition did change the implied meaning and shifted things in a very different manner from friendship to something else. So what was her mother inferring with that particular turn of a phrase or more to the point, what was going on with her right now in reaction to this? Her reaction to this simple sentence was far more extreme than she would have expected. She needed to think this through and make sense of this whole thing as it was making her a bit light headed. "Mom? I'm going upstairs for a while. Okay?"

"That's fine dear. Your father will be back in a little while, he went to get something from the store and then he is going to work in the garden for a bit if you wanted to help him. If you don't that's fine as well. You know how he is with his garden." Her mother did not even look up from what she was reading.

"Okay." Hermione went to her room and shut the door, closing out any possible distractions. She needed to think without any distractions. She rested her head against the door and sighed, what was she thinking? Was she seriously considering what that sentence seemed to denote, that she might be interested in Ginny as more than just a friend all because of what her mother said? That was simply insane. She turned around and saw her bed which was still expanded. It still had the sheets they had slept on and the blankets were still slightly ruffled. They had not taken the time that morning to do more than throw the sheets and blankets up by the pillows, roughly making the bed. It still looked like it had been slept in by two people.

She could feel heat rise in her cheeks and she was sure that if she looked in a mirror she would be blushing. She swallowed heavily and blinked a few times, looking out the window, a nice safe, neutral direction. Her bed was making her blush? Seriously? Was she going mental? This whole idea needed to be considered before things got any more ridiculous.

Instead of sitting on her bed, which she still couldn't look at without coloring, she sat down at her desk chair and pulled out a notebook and pen. No she needed to work this out before her thoughts just crashed. It was just insane that this train of thought was spiraling so out of control in her head. So how was she going to do this? Well if the question were simply if she were interested in Ginny in that way, wouldn't that be a yes or no question? That should be simple enough to answer… right? Or would she rather consider the possibility that she might be interested in girls in general? Or that she might simply be fixating on that elusive dream of hers and Ginny just happened to be the closest non-Ron Weasley to that image? Ugh… that last one made her sound like a bit of a tramp and that did not appeal to her.

Well, maybe part of that last idea had some merit. That recurring dream had been driving her towards something as of late and she had woken up with soaked panties and a serious need for relief more than once thanks to variations of that dream playing through her head. So if she were able to work out the details of the dream and compared them to Ginny then that should be able to end this whole foolish matter right there, right? Or at least give her some degree of relief from this idea of madness. She groaned in frustration. Maybe Bellatrix really had driven her insane?

She wrote down the details she could most easily recall from the dreams such as the red hair, the strong slender arms, the freckles, the different types of loving touches, the searing kisses, and the warmth she felt when she was with them as well as the comfort and security that their presence gave her. That was all she clearly remembered at the moment. She would have to work more if she wanted to niggle out any further particulars from vaguely remembered dreams.

Well, as she mused over this notion she realized that the hair was clearly the right color being that it was your basic Weasley red and closer to Ginny's color than Ron's. She had to admit that thanks to her training as a Chaser, Ginny's arms were slender and strong. There really was no denying that. When she held Hermione after her nightmares she was indeed comforting and warm. Ginny really had a knack with calming her down and getting her to fall back to sleep after some of the worst of her night terrors. She also had to begrudgingly admit that she felt safe in Ginny's embrace in general. When Ginny held her she felt like nothing could ever hurt her. The redhead's touch was definitely… well maybe not loving per se at the moment but maybe there was something there, unless, this was wishful thinking. As for the kisses… Hermione blushed at the thought of things they had never shared. Okay, maybe this train of thought was not being as helpful in denying this idea as she had initially believed.

Directing her thoughts towards the dreams themselves, with Ginny in mind as the other person, other details began to pop becoming clearer and clearer, minutiae starting to stand out more, which shook her. She could see more aspects of the dreams as she thought back now over them and she was not really sure what to do. She could start to see those familiar brown eyes looking at her from that well known face with lust, with love. And then there were the known patterns of freckles on her face. Then she could see the skin, as the two of them were twined together. Then there was movement. Then there was sound and the dream ended with Ginny whispering to her, in a husky voice filled with emotion, "I love you Hermione Weasley."

Hermione practically choked when she recalled that. She felt even more light headed then before and she had to steady herself against the desk, as she was afraid she might fall from her chair in shock. There was no doubt in her mind anymore. Being able to recall the dream, that dream in particular, in such vivid detail pretty effectively nailed things down for her. If her dream was that clear upon further recall than what would it be like if she actually had the dream again? Hermione swallowed nervously and cut her eyes over to the bed, her face warming. The idea was kind of terrifying, kind of titillating. What was becoming of her life? Was this a good or bad development?

Well, she did say that she wanted to change her life and not let anyone else shape what it would become. And if Ginny was who she honestly had feelings for and what she believed in, then shouldn't she actually follow up on that? But what did that actually even mean? How does one even live that way? She knew nothing about how to like girls, ask them out of dates, make out with them, to be a lesbian. Maybe she needed to find a place that had books on the subject? Yes, books would be good. Books could help. Books would be just the thing!

But where? She was lacking a great deal of information on this topic and that was most distressing. This was a problem that needed correcting right now and she had no resources on hand.

She turned and looked at her computer. Well, like she had told Ginny, there were all sorts of sites containing information on the internet and that was what she needed most right now, information. If she was actually attracted to Ginny then she needed to figure this whole thing out before she did something stupid, like tell her how she felt. She hated looking stupid above anything else and the best way to fight against that was to go find all the information she could. It had worked in her life so far.

The search took a while as she fiddled with different search parameters but she eventually found an address for a store that sold books on the subject that was actually in London. That was what she most needed right now, books and the information they contained. They made her feel better and comforted her, gave her strength, helped her find her way when she was lost or confused. Maybe if she got the right books and the right information she could make sense of all of this, because honestly it was making her a feel little bit mental. Just because it happened that Ginny was the person in her dreams did that mean that she honestly wanted Ginny? No, she could not make any decisions now, not without pertinent information to base her decision on. There was no need to jump the gun. She had to deal with this carefully and think this through to the end.

She grabbed her things and headed to the living room, "Mom, I'm heading out for a little bit. I should be back soon."

"Okay. Be safe dear." said her mother absently, not looking up from her own reading.

"I will mom." She walked out to the backyard and disapparated to an alleyway close to the store she was heading towards. Hermione was nervous as she headed towards the bookstore. She was a bit embarrassed to be going in there as the name was so amazingly not subtle as to what it was about, Gay's the Word. However the odds were that no one she knew would be about to see her. But it promised to have the books she needed and that superseded everything at this point. She would probably have even dealt with a Death Eater if they had the information she needed, maybe even gone so far as to deal with Malfoy. That thought made her pause. Well… maybe not Malfoy. Rolling her eyes at herself she had to admit she just might have a problem.

She looked through the large, full front window at all the books on display and it calmed her nerves. This was not some sort of strange den of gay iniquity that she had been afraid of, it was simply a bookshop. Despite the rather shocking name it was still something she was completely familiar with. This was a known and she could easily handle this. She walked inside through the blue door and she looked around the shelves, unsure exactly how to proceed. Given the breadth of her search what sort of titles was she actually searching for? There was another customer browsing the shelves but farther back and he was an older gentleman. She frowned. This would not do.

"Can I help you?" A woman in her early twenties with her blonde hair in a shag cut walked up. She was wearing a name tag reading Sharon.

"Uhm… yes. I… I am looking for some books to help me with a problem. Well not exactly a problem but rather something new and rather unexpected. I think I might be attracted to women, well one woman, but I am not really sure if I am or not or even what I am doing and I would kind of like to figure things out. Do you have any particular titles that can help me?" stammered Hermione, her cheeks coloring more and more the longer she talked. She sounded like a complete nutter.

"It's okay, relax, no one is judging you here. We have all been there. Let me guess, you are just starting to figure all this out and it is freaking you out?" said the woman kindly.

Hermione nodded her cheeks still quite red. Could one die of mortification?

"Right. Well, I think you will probably need something on coming out. That will probably help you the most right now. And perhaps you could use something on relationships, if you are interested in getting into one since you mentioned that girl you're interested in. If you really want lots of information I can even recommend a good book or two on Lesbian sex. There are a few more things I can suggest that might help as well, get you to relax a bit more with the whole idea." suggested Sharon with a salacious grin.

"That sounds good. Uhm… do you happen to have anything like Lesbianism: A History? I like to see things in as broad a context as possible. I… I just really need as much information as possible when I'm figuring things out." Hermione fidgeted a little, slightly uncomfortable talking about this.

"Oh, you're one of those girls. Well, I'm not familiar with that particular title but there are a number of decent books on gay and lesbian history. Do you want something broad based or more focused on a particular era?" she asked in a friendly manner that helped Hermione calm down even more. This was how a bookshop was supposed to work.

"Broad based for now. I am looking for more global knowledge at the moment."

"Let me show you the shelves and the titles I would recommend. You could browse as well and see if anything else strikes your fancy." The woman winked at her before walking off.

"Thank you." The conversation calmed her down and soon Hermione was browsing shelves and collecting books. There were a few on the discovery and coming out process that she found interesting, a couple of relationship books that seemed intriguing, a fairly good sized and detailed sex book that made her eyes pop, and a couple of novels that tickled her fancy. She was enjoying herself going through the shelves and found a book on recent history that seemed interesting and one Sharon recommended on more general history of gay and lesbian culture. That was quite nice to have. This would allow her to better be able to frame things in their proper context. It was a fairly good sized collection of books all in all.

Now her next task would be to see if there were similar books in the magical world, but how could she search for those sorts of things without drawing too much attention to herself? If there were any books with similar titles at Flourish and Blotts that covered any of these topics the moment she went in and bought any of them that news would be all over the wizarding world in a manner of minutes. Everyone would know what she had done and she totally did not need that. She had no polyjuice available and she hated using illusion spells on herself. No, it seemed as if she would have to wait until she got to Hogwarts and search the library there.

The problem was she already knew most of the books that were there and did not recall any particular titles that could imply anything of the sort. She would have to ponder this. As it was, she purchased her stack of books and headed out, stuffing the books into her bag before disapparating home. There was no need to allow her mother or father to see anything that might alarm them at this stage when she was still in the data collection phase of things. No, it was better not to tell them what she was thinking until she had a better idea of what was going on. No need to put the cart before the horse.

She put the books in her school trunk after she had masked them with a few spells, to avoid prying eyes from reading the titles. It really wouldn't do for anyone to stumble onto them and figure things out before she was ready to tell anyone. Once those precautions were set it was time for her to sit back on her bed and start reading her first book on the whole issue of coming out from a lesbian perspective, to see if it had anything to say that would help her with this quandary.

One hundred and seventy three pages later Hermione was sure of one thing, she needed to talk to someone but also sure that she couldn't talk to her parents about this. That would really be way, way too much at this point. No she needed to talk to someone that she knew that she could have a heart to heart with that would not tell everyone and their brother her business. With that there were only two people that she could think of that fit those particular parameters and of those only one of them was not going to be going to classes with her in the fall. She needed to contact Fleur and see if she could talk to her. This was all so confusing that she needed a friendly shoulder to cry on and work all of this out with.

Hermione lowered her face into her hands and groaned in frustration. This whole situation was just what she needed. Her life was not complicated enough, what with everything else going on. What was she going to do about all of this?