Chapter 5 Seeing Right Through

"I'm not riding in that," Regina stated defiantly the moment Emma had brought in the wheelchair. Regina was already dressed in comfortable black slacks and boots. She also wore a gray hoodie over her shirt that may have belonged to Emma, though the blonde denied it when she had dropped off the clothes that morning. She was sitting on the edge of the bed, waiting to finally be discharged.

"Riding in what?" Emma asked as if she had no idea what Regina was talking about.

"Please Miss Swan, I could hear the wheels on that dirty thing squeaking from down the hall. There is no way I'm leaving in that."

"Sorry, hospital regulations."

"As if I care," Regina grumbled and Emma raised an eyebrow at Regina's bad mood this morning. Her sightless gaze was fixed on the direction Emma's voice was coming from, and as usual, she looked right passed her.

"Come on Regina. Do you want to go home or not?"

"Yes, I'd love to go home and by home I don't mean that shack you're taking me to," she finally protested against the idea of staying at Snow's loft and Emma couldn't help the small smile gracing her lips because this was more the Regina she knew. Not the one who had showed no interest and stayed silent about her recovery plans when the decision for Regina to stay at the loft had been made.

"I know you'd rather be at your own home, but you need round the clock care until you heal. The loft is smaller and easier for you to get around. If not then you'll have to spend your recovery here in the hospital.

"I could look after myself just fine," she practically growled, her fist clenching at her sides.

"And how are you going to do that when you can't find the bathroom or god forbid not see the flight of stairs your about to fall down!"

That got Regina's attention and she practically snarled at the blonde. She quickly stood, shooting pains flashing through her ribs and chest, but she faced Emma with sightless eyes.

Truth was, Emma was a little relieved to see Regina fighting her on this. Before, Regina had been entirely too submissive and it worried Emma because it was so beyond Regina's personality. While they had been discussing her recovery plans, Regina didn't even protest about staying at Snows. In fact she didn't say a word. She wasn't herself. Now, the fight was back and Emma was secretly proud of her for it.

Now though, she just wished Regina would let her help her.

"I don't need your help. Leave now, I could get home myself," she seethed, feeling her magic bubbling up inside her. Anger always seemed to trigger it.

"No," Emma said flatly, too stubborn to let Regina have her way. She took a step forward with the wheelchair. "Get in the chair, or I'll put you in it myself." She didn't mean to sound so harsh but she was just about having enough and then she could feel a hint of Regina's magic in the air.

Damn, she hadn't thought about Regina being able to poof herself away, and then as quick a she felt it sparking in the air, it fizzled out like a flame to a candle. The anger that had resided in Regina's eyes turned to deep exhaustion and surprisingly fear. She was afraid of something…

"Regina? You were about to use magic, weren't you?"

"Blindly poofing around isn't a risk I'm willing to take," she said, her gazed fixed unseeingly on the floor and Emma suddenly understood the fear that had flashed in those dark brown eyes. Not only had she lost her sight, she lost the way she would use her magic. How could she aim without sight? How could she focus on a target when she couldn't see it?

This realization seemed to make Regina retreat back into herself and it was like the progress Regina made was gone just like that and Emma cursed in her head. Regina stepped forward, her hand reaching out in front of her and Emma gently took it. She beckoned her forward with a gentle tug.

"I'm sorry Regina," she whispered, lowering her into the wheelchair and Regina didn't say a word.

Regina knew they were outside the moment the warm sunlight hit her face. She couldn't see it, but she could feel it. She would never see the sky again. The burst of anger she had felt earlier was gone and now all she felt was a bone deep exhaustion. Emotionally, she felt drained. The loss of her vision was triggering a downward spiral of anger and depression. Her quick mood swings left her as winded as it did Emma.

Emma helped her into what she believed was the yellow bug. She remained quiet, her eyes focused on her lap as the car finally started. Emma was glancing at her from time to time, she didn't have to see to know. She could feel those eyes on her, the concern radiating off of Emma in waves. She didn't make a sound until Emma hit a speed bump, jostling her lightly in her seat. It was enough to send shooting pains up and through her fractured ribs and bruised chest. She let out a sharp hiss of pain, instantly getting Emma's attention.

"How bad is the pain?" she asked and Regina grimaced at the worry in Emma's tone.

"I could handle it," she said, her voice clipped as she tried to hide the fact that she was in pain. Her ribs were wrapped and her stiches on her belly throbbed. Her head hurt from the bruising on her temple and the stiches as well, and she was sure a migraine was coming on.

"As soon as we get home, you're taking your meds and then it's straight to bed," Emma said and Regina rolled her eyes, though she didn't protest because truthfully she just wanted to lie down and sleep for days.

By the time Emma pulled over in front of the apartment building, Regina was practically sagging in her seat. Her ribs hurt worse than before from all the jostling and her headache had turned into a searing pain.

Of course she wouldn't admit it, but Emma could see it. She could see it in the way Regina had gone pale and the way she couldn't seem to hold herself up.

She helped Regina from the car and they walked into the building. Emma had to practically hold her up with one arm around her waist and the other holding her forearm. The moment Emma saw the stairs, she stopped with a muttered curse word under her breath. Regina was too dizzy and in pain to reprimand Emma for her language, and she felt her letting go with one arm, the other still tightly holding Regina against her.

"Emma, why are we stopping?" she asked, but Emma didn't answer. She was already speaking on what Regina could guess was her cell.

"Dad? We're downstairs in the lobby, but the thing is, I need help getting Regina upstairs. She's in a lot of pain and she's tired."

"I'm right here," Regina's tone dark and laced with annoyance of being talked about although she really was too tired to actually put an end to it and she just listened. Emma's only response was a silent squeeze of the arm around her waist, holding her even closer if it were possible.

"Thanks," she answered David's reply. "I forgot there weren't any elevators in this place… which is kind of odd and ridiculous by the way." Regina couldn't help the smug smirk from gracing her lips at those words. The curse had of course put Mary Margaret on the fourth floor with a torturous set of stairs to climb.

"Wipe the smugness from your face," Emma said with an amused affection. She must have hanged up and Regina shifted her gaze to Emma. She couldn't actually see her. "Your curse had a twisted sense of humor, you know that? This is the worst part of my day, climbing these damn stairs at the end of the day.

"It wasn't twisted, dear. It was creative," Regina said as she heard the rustling of Emma slipping her phone into her back pocket, and then the younger woman was walking her over to some area she couldn't see.

Her eyes were glazed over with exhaustion and pain and her legs felt like jelly. An unfamiliar groan sounded in the room as she was forced to move again and she realized it had come from her own lips.

"I know," Emma soothed her and then she was being lowered into one of the chairs she briefly remembered being in the lobby.

"I'm perfectly capable of walking up those stairs," Regina tried telling her, tried to sound as if pain currently weren't shooting through her body like knives.

"You're in pain," Emma told her, seeing right through the façade. "And you're exhausted."

"My legs weren't damaged." It had been her chest and ribs pinned between the seat and the steering wheel, trapping her amongst the wreckage that had been her car. Her legs weren't hurt at all except for minor scrapes and bruises.

"No, but they could barely hold you up," Emma wasn't giving in and Regina felt her presence infront of her and her shirt gently being lifted. She blindly swatted Emma's hand away.

"What do you think you're doing!"

"Just checking to see if you pulled any stitches," she answered, reaching out and pulling the shirt up just enough to see the bandages. Regina closed her eyes, leaning back into the chair as she felt Emma untaping the bandages and checking the surgical wound where Whale had repaired the internal bleeding in her abdomen. The fact that she couldn't even see the state of her injuries scared her but she trusted Emma and she was glad she was checking them. The pain was enough to make her worry if she had ended up tearing the stitches open.

She felt Emma taping it back to her skin and then repeating the process with the bandage on her temple where the head wound had been.

"They're fine but we need to change the dressings once we get inside," Emma explained and Regina's eyes snapped opened at the sound of heavy footsteps coming from the direction of the staircase. She stiffened at the sound, growing uneasy at the unknown presence. She'd probably have to get used to that.

"How is she?" David asked and Regina could feel herself relaxing at the familiar tone of David's voice.

"She's right here. Ask her yourself," Regina replied before Emma could. Her tone was hostile and angry but they could both see the way she seemed to shrink into herself. She was ashamed of being seen like this. She was ashamed of needing help and the fact that she could no longer see who walks into the room.

"Her majesty is her usual snarky self," Emma quipped and Regina sharply turned towards her voice in annoyance. Her eyes weren't focused but that didn't mean she didn't try sending Emma a glare.

"Charming," David deadpanned at Regina and Regina turned to the direction of his voice. His annoyed expression faded when she looked right through him as if he weren't there. She couldn't see him and his heart clenched, aching for the woman that had become his ally.

"No dear, that's you," Regina retorted.

"Ok, enough. Let's get upstairs," Emma interjected between them, because honestly, they could keep this banter up all day.

David moved to pick her up, but Regina pushed him away the moment she felt him touch her.

"I may not have my sight or my strength right now, but I still have my dignity. Help me stand."

Stubborn as always. Emma and David helped Regina up, each flanking her side and holding her up. Regina was more exhausted then she led on because the moment she was up she sagged into their hold. Whatever strength she had left, Emma could feel it diminishing with each a step. Her breaths were labored and she had gone pale from the pain and exertion.

They were nearly halfway up to the fourth floor when Regina stop. She leaned a little too heavily into Emma and they nearly fell over if David hadn't steadied them.

"Whoa, hey," Emma said softly, gently lowering them to the floor with David's help. Emma held her, not missing the way Regina's body tiredly sank into her. She was mentally cursing her lack of strength, hating how weak she probably looked to Emma and David at the moment. This was why she had insisted on walking up the stairs even when her ribs were in too much pain. Emma leaned down close to Regina's ear and she shivered when she felt her warm breath, her lips barely an inch away.

"I know what you're doing," Emma told her and Regina struggled to sit up but the other woman only tightened her hold. With a huff of annoyance and maybe even exhaustion from that trying task she sank back into Emma, her chest heaving from the small exertion. "I know you're trying to be strong, but right now being strong is admitting when you need help. You're tired, Regina. You are in pain; and no one thinks you're weak if you just let David carry you up the rest of the stairs."

"Regina, please…" David whispered after a moment of silence. He was kneeling before the two women. Regina's sightless gaze was fixed downward and she seemed to be mentally at war with herself as to what to do next. "You could barely even breathe."

A beat of silence passed once again and this time Emma nodded at David, not wasting another moment because if they let Regina have her way, they'd probably be sitting here for hours. He gathered her into her arms and lifted her from the floor and away from Emma.

They thought she would have snapped. Threw out some biting remarks but she stayed silent and it was the total opposite of what they expected from her. So David took her up to the loft with Emma following closely behind.

"We're here," Emma said more for Regina's sake when they finally reached the fourth floor and that was when David felt Regina's entire body tensing in his arms. Snow and Henry were inside and he knew they were the last people she wanted to see her like this. So he gently set her down on her feet again with Emma's help.

"Thank you," she whispered so low they almost missed it but they heard and chose not to respond expect for Emma lightly squeezing her hand and then letting go to open the door. They knew she wasn't at a place right now to accept any kind of big response to her silent gratitude. Her pride was already so battered at this point.

"Mom!" Henry's voice broke through her dark world the moment she heard the sound of the door opening and the feel of his arms wrapping around her the moment she was inside.

"Henry," and she seemed to perk up for the first time since the incident on the stairs.

"How are you feeling?" he asked and she felt Emma leaving her side and allowing David to lead her to the couch. She couldn't see her but she felt Emma's presence still hovering by her side. She sat down and hid the wince at the soreness of her wounds. Her ever present headache still viciously throbbing.

"Better," she spoke, feeling the couch dip beside her under his weight.

"You look exhausted," Snow's voice suddenly sounded and she turned to the direction it came from. She was standing right beside her and Regina wondered how long she had been there. "How about I make you some tea and then you could get some sleep."

"No, I just want to sleep," Regina said, struggling to stand and then realizing she had no sense of direction at the moment. She was afraid to move, unsure of what surrounded her. She was afraid of making herself look like an idiot in front of these people. She was afraid of looking even weaker than she already must look to them. As these thoughts viscously plagued her mind someone took her hand and led her towards the loft. It was when she caught the distinct scent of Emma then she knew it was her.

"Come on, let's get those bandages changed first and then you could sleep," she said, saving her from the embarrassment she was sure she would have made of herself if she attempted looking for the loft herself.

She allowed Emma to lead her up the steps and into her bedroom and when the bandages were changed she finally allowed herself to rest. Her body was sore, her head throbbing, but her mind was numb.

The events of this morning only proved to her how different her life was going to be from now on. Henry's voice made her realize how much she missed him even when he was right next to her and Emma's little pep talk on the stairs made her realize how much the blonde savior could see right through her.

And that alone terrified her.