Chapter 23

Goodnight

Regina insisted on making sandwiches for Henry and herself when they got home, which she allowed, just this once, for him and her to take to their rooms before bedtime. She hated not sitting at the kitchen counter with her son but she knew him better than anyone. On the walk home she could see his curious eyes scrutinizing and worrying about her. Genes or no genes that was a trait he definitely inherited from her. She wasn't about to break down on her teenage son about the horrors experienced in hell. No, for that she had Archie, which she had already texted when she got home and secured an appointment for this week.

Regina wanted to get in her shower and wash away all the filth and rage. But she told herself she wouldn't dwell on it. No, that was left for her therapy session. She couldn't wait to get in her comfortable silky pajamas and lay in her bed so she may go to that place of solace at last and think about Emma. She needed to decipher everything that had taken place. She needed to feel her racing heart, Emma's heart in the quiet of her room with her eyes closed. She knew she had at least that. Her beautiful and impulsive, brilliantly absentminded Emma had done the ultimate deed. She needed to lay down, she needed to press her hands over her heart and allow herself sob in peace.

She was finally making her way to her bedroom after wishing Henry goodnight when he turned around, "You know...Ma told me to protect you."

Regina swiftly turned with a quizzical look on her face.

"She told me to make sure all the doors were locked and stuff." Regina involuntarily looks down and smiles. 'This woman just gave me her heart, what more could she possibly give?'

"And to call her if anything...anyway I thought you should know. Should I be worried about anything?"

Regina is far gone in memories of watching her dead body laying before her. Then catching Emma's determined, piercing blue eyes as her hand immersed her heart deeply into the brunette's chest. This plays like an old faulty reel over and over, again and again.

She tries to blink it away. "No Henry, Emma's just being Emma. Anyway I put a protection spell on the house every night. Like a magic alarm system."

"Cool. Goodnight mom. Let me know if you need anything."

"Don't worry sweetheart, you let me know if you need anything."

Regina ate her sandwich quickly as she removed her dirty clothing and deposited them into her hamper. She got in the shower and felt immediate relief at the warm water rushing down her head to her feet. She knew she probably had bruising in private places where no one should be bruised. But she refused to inspect herself tonight. She willed that instinct away for it would only serve as a sinister reminder. Instead she stood there in the steam motionless and frozen. And she did exactly what she promised herself she wouldn't do in her shower...she started sobbing. The trauma of her experiences in hell came crashing through. She mentally told herself she was fine. She told herself she'd been through much worse. But none the less the tears kept coming so finally she told herself she needed the release. When she was good and tired and practically falling asleep, she lathered well, rinsed off the shampoo and soap, then stepped out. She didn't even bother to use conditioner nor shave her legs. She didn't even bother to use magic for it. She got into her silk pajamas and laid in her soothing bed with wet hair and all. She closed her eyes as she took a deep breath, put her hands over her chest, felt the beating of the most beautiful heart she had ever besought. Her mind, her heart, her vision and self were saturated in Emma. And then when she felt the complete safety and love of it all; the earth-shattering completeness that she terribly wished to dwell in, with all the meaning and implications of it, she fell asleep.

Emma was laying in bed trying to fall asleep. She couldn't stop her nervous feet from fidgeting nor could she just clear her mind for a second.

Images of Regina being held captive flooded her mind. 'My blood pressure must be through the roof.' She thought.

After eating at the diner and her not saying a word to her parents they headed back to the loft. She showered and didn't even bother to dress. She locked her door and plopped down on her bed over the sheets. It was getting late and she wanted to be at the mansion first thing in the morning to check on Regina and Henry. Emma was tossing and turning and despite her nudity she felt incredible warm. 'Why is it that when you need to sleep the most it becomes the hardest? So frustrating!'

But Emma knew tonight was going to be difficult. After all they just got back from 'fucking Tartarus.' And boy did they experience hell alright.

Emma had a million questions. Some she knew Gold or even Regina could answer but most questions were about Regina so she wasn't sure she dare ask. Emma sat up and deeply sighed. This was never going to work. There's no way she could wait till morning.

'What could be going through Regina's mind? Was she okay? Of course she's not okay you idiot! She was just kidnapped in hell and sexually, mentally, and emotionally tortured only to have her heart ripped out of her and then replaced by mine. Oh God! What if she's angry with me? I mean I gave her half my heart, without her permission no less, and kinda walked away to granny's diner with my parents. What the fuck is wrong with me?'

Emma knew she had done what she does best...run away from the problem. Except this wasn't a problem. At least not to her. This felt like the most incredible thing she'd ever done aside from Henry. But just because she felt this way didn't mean Regina did. Emma was so confused. 'Clearly Robin isn't her true love...can he be? No, he can't be.' She had only asked about Daniel. She never had time to inquire about the thief.

She could not fathom Robin ever being Hercules. 'There's no way!' But then who was it? Did she even know this person?

'Oh God what if it was Robin or someone else and she forced Regina into something she didn't want? I didn't give her a choice, I selfishly gave her my heart.' Emma didn't remember much about english class but that sounded ironic even in her head. But she understood what she meant. 'If Robin is her true love (Emma gags as the thought runs through her mind) and she wants him how is she supposed to explain that half of me is inside of her? Was I wrong?'

Emma quickly got dressed. She had to go over there. She had to talk to Regina, make sure that she and Henry were okay. In the past by now she'd have gotten in her bug and left town; she was a coward anytime she felt any emotion that held a semblance to home. Not that any emotion ever came remotely close to this. 'Oh boy...is that what she feels like to me? Home?'

Her parents were everything Emma would have ever hoped for. Sometimes a bit too much of what a child or adult would hope for. But she felt there was always something missing. She wanted to blame it on the damn tree dump or on trying to get rid of her evil. But when she thought about it... the times she has felt truly complete and at home with her parents were all the events that involved Regina and Henry as well. Not just her son but his other mother. Just being with her parents alone left her with a strange longing. She always figured she was maybe missing Neal still? Or just worried about never finding that right person.

The right person was there all along. Even when poor Hook was doting on her and giving her his all...it only took one dangerous mission for Regina to have Emma abandon all thoughts of him or anybody else for that matter. She kamikaze'd her way into Regina's mission just to make sure she'd be safe. Emma made Regina's happy ending more important than any other task she had undertaken.

'Because...I... wanted to be her happy ending. All along it was me.'

As Emma went down the stairs she thought of how badly she wanted to 'take that bug and run to Boston until things cooled down' and that's exactly why she was going to the mansion instead. She was the Savior damn it! She was going to be brave and instead of spending weeks away to allow things to "settle down" she was going to stay in the heat of the moment and follow her heart. For the second time in her life she knew it was leading her in the right direction. The first time was Henry. And now...'oh boy!'

The minute she stepped outside the freezing cold air hit her face. "Shit! It's gonna be hard staying in the heat of the moment when it's this freakin cold outside."