AN: Inspired by lyrics from "Something to Someone" by Lit
The rehearsal is now over. We're all prepared for tomorrow and the rehearsal dinner is under way. I can't enjoy it though. My thoughts are elsewhere and my attempt to eat is only half-hearted. For once I don't have much of an appetite.
Instead, I've been watching Kurt. I can see the difference in him tonight. It's like a weight has been lifted from his shoulders. As he sits with Mercedes, Tina and Mike the smile on his face tonight isn't forced. Rachel says that he's lost weight, but I have to take her word with that as I can't tell a difference. Now that it's visible effects are gone, I can see how stressed Kurt has been. The situation with Karofsky was worse than I thought, and I refused to see it because I was worried about myself. I haven't been a decent friend to Kurt and starting tomorrow I'm going to be his brother. I intend to do a much better job at that then I have at being a friend.
How do I convey that to him though?
I think of everything we've gone through the last year and a half. I've gone from standing by and letting the bullying take place so I can fit in, to standing up for him when it benefits me. I'm not sure how that is progress but it's change. Despite our differences, I've actually found that I enjoy spending time with Kurt. I haven't told anyone, but 'family dinners' and game nights are something I look forward to. Though I had shouted at him during our brief stint at sharing a room that I wish he would try to blend in more, I realize now that I really don't want him to. Kurt's strength and bravery at being himself despite the crap he takes from those around him is an admirable trait. My mom shows compassion to everyone around her, and I can see that trait in Kurt.
Yeah, perhaps his fashion tastes are flamboyant at times, and his crush on me was awkward but I realize that I'm lucky to have Kurt in my corner. Just telling him that though, after everything that's gone on between us, won't be enough. I need a way to show him the realizations that I've made.
The best man speech Kurt prepared for me is sitting next to my plate. As an idea comes to me, I know I won't be using it. I'll make my own speech, one that includes Kurt, and with the help of our friends show him that I'm ready to stand by his side no matter what it means for me. Show him that I'm willing to take on the role of a true brother. I have no doubt that our friends will help me because being there for one another is part of what Glee is about, something else that I'm finally learning.