A/N: Thanks for the reviews everyone, and thanks for reading.
Hasn't been proofed, apologies for all the horrendous grammatical/typing errors that are sure to follow.
LIX.
Several hours had passed since Hal and Ben returned with the refugees from the city. Jimmy hesitantly approached the captain's tent, stood at its entrance uncertainly, hands jammed in his pockets and a small frown on his lip. He could hear the captain inside, and Jeanne, the captain's daughter. They were talking in low whispers, every so often there would be a pause and from a crack shivering in the tent flap, Jimmy could see them, exchange hugs and other familiar touches. For several seconds longer than Jimmy knew was right, he stood spying on them, afraid to interrupt, but desperate to end the scene if only in hopes it would end the strange pain that had settled in his chest. It didn't make sense, that he would feel so sad, when he was happy for the captain. For Weaver, the loss of his family had weighed heavy on his shoulders and in his mind, a burden he couldn't escape that darkened his every thought and action. Jimmy knew the feeling; he thought it connected him and the captain in a way that few others could understand.
"Jimmy, you coming in?" Captain Weaver called, startling Jimmy from his own musings.
Jimmy seized up a bit, tensed his shoulders and forced a smile that resembled more a grimace, gently pushed back the tent flap and attempted to meet the captain's eye. Weaver put a hand on his daughter's shoulder, gave it a small squeeze as fatherly pride swarmed his features, and the girl studied Jimmy curiously as he slipped into the tent.
"They said you wanted to see me," Jimmy began, faltered, and apologized, "I didn't want to interrupt but I mean to stand outside…I wasn't listening in or anything…"
"It's alright," Captain Weaver said, waved his hand as though waving away the sentiment, "Jeanne, I want you to meet one of my best fighters. This is Jimmy. I know he doesn't look like much, but you put a gun in his hand, tell him what to shoot, he gets the job done."
"It's nice to meet you," Jeanne greeted, tucking a tuft of hair behind her ear, standing and extending her hand.
Reluctantly, Jimmy returned the gesture, shaking the offered appendage stiffly and then promptly shoving his hand back in its pocket.
"He's young," Jeanne noted, wrinkled her brow and quietly commented, "You have fighters so young in your unit."
"It was a hard choice to make letting someone his age on the battlefield and some days I'm not sure it was the right one," Weaver conceded.
Jimmy shifted uncomfortably, dropped his gaze, and nibbled the corner of his cheek, as he let Weaver's words shock through him as though a swift gut shot. The only reason Weaver made the choice to let Jimmy fight was because Jimmy didn't give the old man another option. He'd begged and pleaded, pitched fits, stowed away on missions, and even threatened to leave camp on more than one occasion if he wasn't given proper training and a role in the war, not that it carried much weight – 2nd Mass probably would've been glad to be rid of him and that undoubtedly went double for the commanding officers, Weaver included, regardless, he let it be known why he traveled with the 2nd Mass and that he wouldn't be set aside with the civilians for long.
"It's smart. All of the children with us know how to shoot, how to fend for themselves. I taught most of them," Jeanne proudly proclaimed, sought Jimmy's eyes and asked him, "What about your family?"
"Shouldn't you be more concerned about yours?" Jimmy returned sharply on instinct, caught himself, darted Weaver a sheepish look, and dropped his gaze again, hastily amended, "Sorry. There's nothing about them. They're dead. That's it."
"No, I'm sorry. You're right, I shouldn't have asked," Jeanne said. She caught sight of the compass around Jimmy's neck and without thinking reached for it, "Dad, is that your old…"
Jimmy startled at the sudden movement, jerking back and Jeanne froze.
"I'm sorry. Did I do something…?" she started, looking curiously to her father. It ached through Jimmy, as Weaver heaved a weary sigh, a shadow of disappointment hovering in his eyes. Be nice to the daughter, the concept sounded simple enough, but just like Ben said, Jimmy had a way of making everything difficult.
"No, Jeanne, you didn't do anything. I should've warned you, Jimmy can be a bit anxious around people he's not quite familiar with yet," Weaver explained, and it felt like another punch in the gut. No matter how hard he tried, how carefully he schooled his words, and checked his behavior, Jimmy would always be the sewer rat orphan dug out of Dorchester, and even more so, the worthless little pothead that hid beneath the bleachers and couldn't even protect his own sister. A burden in every life.
"I can't really blame him," Jeanne stated disdainfully, haunted memories flitting across her features.
"Have you had a lot of problems out there?" Weaver questioned, his attention shifting to his daughter entirely, as they slipped into conversation.
All but forgotten, Jimmy stood awkwardly at the tent entrance, debating a moment whether he should stay or leave, before realizing Weaver had yet to reveal why he'd called Jimmy there in the first place and decided that he should probably wait for further instruction instead. He tried not to listen in on Weaver and Jeanne's conversation as he waited to be noticed again, studying the far corner of the tent as though it were the most interesting flap of tarp in the world. He couldn't help glimpses out of the corner of his eye though, and overheard word or two. Captain Weaver seemed attentive to his daughter, but there was uncertainty in his actions, and a noticeable distance between the two. They were each holding back. The scene was painfully familiar to Jimmy in ways he couldn't explain, two people enthralled in a conversation with one another and, yet, neither one actually saying anything.
Eventually, the father and daughter fell into a disquieting silence. Weaver cleared his throat and looked to Jimmy once again. Jimmy perked, hoping to get his orders and be sent away soon.
"I lent Jimmy the compass a month or so back. For all his good points, he has a terrible sense of direction," Weaver said, clarifying Jeanne's earlier partially unasked question.
Jimmy absently raised a hand to touch the compass, lowered his head, as it dawned on him. Of course, when Weaver lent the compass to Jimmy, he had mentioned wanting to pass it on to his children but lamented that it might not happen. As Weaver had no other need of it beyond sentimentality, he'd given it to Jimmy to use until Jimmy found another one. With his daughter's return, Weaver had need of the compass again. He wanted it back so he could give it to Jeanne and that was why he'd called Jimmy to his tent. Jimmy curled his fingers round the compass, closed his eyes and took a slow, deep breath. It was a perfectly reasonable request, and it had been an unwarranted kindness on Weaver's part entrusting Jimmy with the compass at all, but for whatever reason, Jimmy didn't want to give it up. He used it on practically every mission he went on, he still needed it. Would it be fair of him to ask to use it just a little longer, he wondered.
"…done more for this unit than most fighters twice his age," Weaver was saying.
Jeanne watched her father speak, darting small glances at Jimmy every so often, and offering him a small smile when he looked up and caught her eye. He immediately dropped his gaze again, squeezed the compass and then let it go. What right did he have to deny Jeanne her father's compass? He had no claim to it. It wasn't his to keep and he had no place to ask for it awhile longer.
"He's headstrong, reminds me of you sometimes," Weaver finished whatever he was telling Jeanne.
"Me? Headstrong? I think you're confusing me with you, papa bear," Jeanne laughed. She wrinkled her nose at Jimmy and softly mused, "He's a man of few words like you too."
A shadow drifted across Weaver's features and he nodded, carefully replied, "I suppose that's true."
Why didn't he just ask for the damn thing already? Why did they just keep laughing and talking? Couldn't they see that Jimmy didn't belong there? The Mason brothers had their father back. Weaver had his daughter back. And Jimmy didn't belong anywhere. Weaver just needed to ask for the fucking compass back, so that Jimmy could give it to him, and finally leave, disappear back into the night, another faceless, nameless member of the 2nd Mass.
"Sir," Jimmy started, ready to bite the bullet, hand over the compass, and excuse himself, all the while hating the hitch in his voice, when the tent flap opened slightly and the older boy that came back with the refugees poked his head in.
"Diego," Jeanne greeted.
"We were getting ready to leave," Diego explained his sudden intrusion.
"Already? I wanted you to meet my father," Jeanne whispered to Diego.
Diego considered the gruff captain, as Weaver gave him a stern once over, and as if making a heavy weighted decision in that moment, Diego stalked into the tent towards Captain Weaver and offered up a hand, which Weaver reluctantly accepted. They began another conversation and Jimmy now forgotten entirely in the background, slipped the compass from his neck and set it on a nearby chair. He hastily ducked from the tent and, paused but a heartbeat to let the inexplicable ache spread through his chest and fade away, he hurried across camp. He headed without a conscious direction, his feet carrying him to the farthest edge of camp and beyond until he collapsed against the side of a building, gasping for air and trying to get his bearings straight, head spinning out of control.
Several minutes passed, and Jimmy slumped to the ground, buried his head in his knees. He told himself he was happy for Weaver. Happy for Ben. Happy for them because there weren't too many people left in the world to be happy for. Good things rarely came to the 2nd Mass, they should take what they got, right? Jimmy barely stirred at the sound of approaching footfalls, with his luck it was probably Skitters, not that he was entirely opposed to a sudden assault on the camp at that moment.
"You alright, brat?"
Jimmy winced and sighed.
"Leave me alone, Roman."
There was a long drawn out silence. Roman stepped forward and took a seat next to Jimmy. Jimmy made a face and lifted a glare to the other boy.
"What? You said to leave you alone, I'm not doing anything to you. I'm just sitting out here, keeping to myself," Roman grumbled, leaned back against the wall with his legs crossed, set his hands on his knees and stared expectantly at Jimmy.
"Fine. I'll go," Jimmy muttered, started to his feet.
"Saw you climbing off the bus with your razorback earlier," Roman casually commented and Jimmy froze, "Here I thought you'd wised up, gone your separate way from him."
"You're so far off the mark, I'm starting to think you don't really have super hearing after all," Jimmy returned, took a small breath and admitted, "Ben wants to tell his father about us."
Roman scoffed, "That'll end well."
"What do you know about it?" Jimmy snapped, turning to the other boy.
Roman shrugged, folded his arms in his lap. In that position, for a flickering second, he didn't seem like the arrogant asshole he usually was, but the quiet, vulnerable child Gia spoke of before their harnessing. Jimmy lowered his eyes to blink away the image.
"I'm not sure how things work in his family, but in mine, good Catholic boy carrying on a relationship in sin like that gets the shit beat out of him hard enough he can't stand for three days," Roman casually answered. Jimmy stared at the older boy several seconds, hesitantly retook his seat, leaned his head back to stare at the pale blue sky.
"I hadn't really thought about that," Jimmy murmured, frowned and confessed, "My dad put me in the hospital that long once. Something about school…I got caught with cherry bombs. Fucking cherry bombs. They weren't even mine, I wasn't even going to set them off. I don't want to know what he'd of done if I ever had to tell him about Ben."
"Why were you in the hospital that long? Broken bones?" Roman wondered.
"No. My dad knocked me a little too hard into a wall, I hit my head. They were worried about a concussion, I guess," Jimmy explained, sniffed, smiled distantly, "My parents told the hospital I'd fallen off the jungle gym."
"The razorback worried about how his dad'll take it?" Roman asked.
"No. I don't know. He was the one suggested we do it, so I guess not," Jimmy said.
"That must be a nice luxury, not having to worry about things like that," Roman commented. Jimmy smirked. A silence fell over them not altogether unsettling.
"How are you and the others doing?" Jimmy carefully questioned, "I mean, since Kelsey…"
"You know, it's not like she's dead," Roman noted.
"I know."
"Gia and Doug don't seem to care she's gone," Roman muttered, "Sometimes I think they forget everything she did for them…for all of us."
"Did? What did she do?" Jimmy wondered, furrowed his brow and tilted his head to the other boy. Roman had his attention towards camp, though his eyes weren't focused on anything in particular.
"Kept us together. Made us a family," Roman answered offhandedly, as though it were obvious.
"Kelsey did that?" Jimmy tried to picture the fluffy haired, buck-toothed, sociopath as the type to bring people together. The few encounters Jimmy had with her, she'd been hard to read, wavering between a cold, calculating bitch and a shy, uncertain little girl. She had her own agendas, and Jimmy would be happier she was gone if he wasn't too busy worrying about where she was and, more specifically, what she was doing there.
"When they took off our harnesses, we were surrounded by strangers, most of which didn't really want us around," Roman said, "While the rest of us were panicked, scared, didn't know where are families were, where we were, Kelsey kept it cool. She took care of us. She told us that no one would ever understand what we were now, what we'd seen, done, been through. That only we would understand and that we needed to stay together, rely on one another."
"Do you know much about her before the harness?"
"No," Roman shifted, settled more comfortably against the wall, "She never talked about before the harness. It was like she didn't exist until the moment they took that harness off her. I mean, we asked, we talked about before a lot. At first, mostly about our families, wondering where they were and if they survived. Before your razorback hit our camp, Gia had like seven little sisters and brothers…"
"Seven," Jimmy gasped. He thought his one little sister had been a handful.
"Yeah, tell me about it. And Doug had his mom, uncle, a few cousins. Anyone young enough is probably still out there, wearing one of those slugs on their backside," Roman continued, "But if Kelsey had family she was worrying about, she never mentioned them once."
"Because she doesn't. She's an orphan," Jimmy whispered, frowned and furrowed his brow, realizing, "Like me."
"Makes sense, I guess," Roman agreed, grinned at Jimmy, a look that made Jimmy's stomach twist into knots, "You and her are a lot alike, now that I think about it."
"What? No way…"
"That quiet, unsuspecting, squirrely type of personality," Roman went on.
"Why does everyone calling me squirrely now?" Jimmy complained.
"Because you are squirrely," Roman jeered, "What's the matter? It's better than runt, or small fry, or…"
"Fuck you," Jimmy groaned.
"You're easily underestimated but always smart enough to take advantage of it," Roman finished, "Exactly the same. That must be why she didn't like you."
"I thought she didn't like me because you did," Jimmy clacked his mouth shut hard, and peeked uncertainly at Roman.
Roman was quiet a long time, jaw set and eyes glaring into the horizon.
"You know the problem with girls?"
"Never much had to deal with them," Jimmy absently mumbled.
"They never know when to shut the fuck up."
"It wasn't GIa," Jimmy quickly corrected, sighed and added, "It was Ben."
"Fucking razorback doesn't know anything," Roman scoffed.
"But Gia did tell me that Ben killed your grandmother," Jimmy interjected, another silence, and Jimmy turned to study Roman, the older boy had his face turned away, he'd sat up, his shoulders tensed and hands in balled in lost fists, "I'm sorry."
"For what?" Roman grit out.
"I just don't understand, why do you hate Ben so much? You know that what he did, that it was the harness that made him do it," Jimmy insisted.
"There was no harness," Roman growled.
"The aliens then, fuck," Jimmy spat, "Doesn't matter what made him do it, it wasn't him."
"You should go."
"Roman," Jimmy groaned.
"He's not wrong, I do want you," Roman said, and the words bit through Jimmy, ice in his veins, replaced quickly with liquid fire as Roman locked eyes with him, "And if you stay here much longer, I am going to take you from him."
Jimmy stumbled to his feet, a fell back a few steps, flush with Roman's declaration.
"That's not going to happen," Jimmy stammered, "You're wasting your time."
"You should go," Roman repeated, smiled thinly, "Unless, of course, you want to stay."
…
By mid-afternoon, the refugees were packed with supplies – what little the 2nd Mass could spare – and ready to leave. Ben found Hal sitting at a table keeping an eye on the young boys playing kickball with a group of 2nd Mass children, Matt amongst them, while their "parents" were seemingly MIA. He hovered over Hal's shoulder a moment, until the older boy cleared his throat and turned an impatient look on Ben.
"Yes?"
Ben rolled his eyes, plopped into the seat across from Hal and demanded, "What do I owe you for earlier?"
"Owe me?" Hal perked an amused brow at his younger brother.
"Cut the crap, Hal, I know the helpful brother routine is never free of charge," Ben grumbled, "I'd rather just pay up my debts now. What do you want?"
"Would it be too much to ask that I never have to catch you and Jimmy in the middle of a heavy make-out session – or any make-out session for that matter – ever again?" Hal wondered.
"Be serious," Ben smirked.
"No verbal tongue lashing," Hal noted, "I take it things went well then."
"Did you want details?" Ben jokingly questioned, grinning broadly.
"God, no," Hal quickly answered, making a face, "The less I know about what happens between you and him on that bus, the better."
Hal cleared his throat, wiped the light-hearted mirth from his features.
"I am happy for you, Ben," Hal said earnestly.
"Thanks, Hal. For earlier, and everything," Ben replied, "Seriously, though, what do you want as payment for it?"
"Nah, forget about it. Dad shut up after you left, so that seems payment enough," Hal answered. He shifted uncomfortably and carefully started, "I had never asked you how long you and Jimmy were…were you know, before I found out and it's been awhile since you've had to be too secretive about things. You looking forward to sneaking around behind someone's back again? I mean, I'm ready to lay down cover stories for you, but it will mean cutting way back on time spent alone in compromising situations with him."
"We're going to tell dad," Ben readily responded.
"Really?" Hal gaped, staring at Ben in baffle.
"Yeah. I'm kind of excited about it," Ben continued, sighing, "Jimmy isn't. You know how he is with the sharing on his personal life. I've convinced him, sort of, but he wants to wait a bit until he's 'ready'. Whatever that means."
"It might mean he's smarter than you," Hal chortled.
"How do you figure that?" Ben asked, quirked his head to one side.
"Clearly you've never noticed that as far as dad's concerned, you're still six," Hal said easily, "Something tells me dad's not going to take the news well that you've been getting boned by the gun-toting bad-ass orphan that drinks, smokes, and cusses up a shit storm."
"Okay, first of all, I do most of the boning."
"Ugh, and there are the details that I don't want."
"And second of all, dad likes Jimmy."
"Yes, he did, but that was before you and Jimmy were screwing around," Hal pointed out, "Did I ever tell you about the time Jimmy knocked back a beer in front of dad? Dad went to say something about it, Jimmy's reply, and I quote, 'Last I checked, my parents were dead, and I'm not looking for replacements'. Sure, dad likes Jimmy well enough to take him on grocery runs and scouting missions. Doesn't mean he likes Jimmy well enough to let him date you."
"That's bullshit," Ben spat, "Maybe Jimmy was a bit rough around the edges when he first joined the 2nd Mass, but that was a long time ago. Jimmy has a lot of respect for dad, and dad knows it. Dad wanted me to be friends with Jimmy before, this is not all that different."
"Oh, it's a lot different."
Ben leaned forward on his knees and rubbed his hand across his face, grunting in agitation. Hal shifted in his seat, leaned back a bit.
"Listen, Ben, dad's going to hate whoever you 'bring home' no matter who it is. All I'm saying is Jimmy makes a really easy target."
"What am I supposed to do about that?" Ben demanded, "Jimmy is the one I'm with, he's the one I love. I can't change that and hiding it from dad isn't going to make it go away, and I'm not going to sneak around and lie about it. I'm telling dad about my relationship, I'm not asking him for permission, I'm just letting him know. If he has a problem with it, with any part of it, especially Jimmy, then it'll be his problem and he'll need to deal with it."
Hal nodded, stretched and ran his hand through his hair.
"I guess you're right," he conceded, gently slapped Ben's knee, "You have my support, okay. I got your back with dad."
"Thank you," Ben sighed, wrinkled his nose and wondered, "Why are you being so nice right now?"
"Because, Ben," Hal began wisely, "A day may come, when I will similarly need your support and assistance in my love life, and I expect you to give it, a hundred percent, no questions asked."
"Deal," Ben grinned, "But same rules apply, details to a minimum. I don't want to know what you do with any girl on that bus either."
.
.
.
AN: Yup, so, Weaver/Jeanne/Jimmy scene, awkwardness avails. Roman has now made clear his intentions, at least towards Jimmy. Sort of. And Hal is being more of the good brother, aww...and maybe dashed Ben's eager idealistic vision of the future a bit.
Real quick on Tom last chapter: I got to say this because everyone made similar comment on it about his being in denial or something along those lines. I don't know, maybe it's just me, but I feel most people in that situation with no prior knowledge of either boy having homosexual preferences would immediately think "oh, they're in here making out". He knew they were up to something, but his mind didn't automatically fly to sexual activity. If I were Tom in those circumstances, I wouldn't immediately think that those two boys were making out either, and hey, nine times out of ten I'd probably be right.
Okay, uh, let me know what you think please.
Reviewers: NOxONE, I'll go ahead and take that as a compliment. Yes, it was fluffy, cutesy, pervy, funny all at one. Hope this chapter was worth the wait. IcicleLilly, I'm glad you liked the chapter! Yeah, there were other things I didn't like about it beyond it being plain old fluff, I'm sure, I just can't think of them right now. Original plan in my head, back when I first started writing this damn thing, Tom would've actually found out in that scene, but my plans have changed so much for this story. Jeanne and Diego weren't actually going to appear so early either, but you know, shit happens. Dee, ah yes, the uber-angsty line. I'm just starting to realize, Jimmy has a bit more of a flair for the dramatic than Ben. I'm glad you get that sex is awkward, especially those first times when you're learning what goes where, how and why. Obviously you're waiting for the oral sex scene that just needs to be in the story, as if there will be just one, personally I can't wait to write the scene when the boys put it all together and end up with something beautiful. I'm hoping it turns out as emotional as I see it in my head, but we'll never know until I get it in print. You're absolutely right that Ben would've untied jimmy if he were really upset. Ben just knows he can get away with doing whatever he wants to Jimmy. It's a good thing all he wants to do to Jimmy is make Jimmy feel good. Ah, the future fic, no more talking about it. I hope it's good. I'll probably post the prologue when I've finished this, then I'll start posting the next installment of Fire Light (still breaking Fire Light into two), and maybe I'll try posting both simultaneously, but the future fic will have infrequent updates. We'll see. Oh, I know Jimmy wasn't randomly selected to kill off. It was painstakingly obvious in season 1 they had no fucking clue what to do with his character (I feel I've ranted about this before...). You know, I'm starting to think maybe I do secretly write for Falling Skies. I wondered when/if they were going to address the physical stress the harness's genetic alterations could potentially cause to the characters...I actually toyed with it being a part of this story's plotline, something about how not every child harnessed survived the initial genetic alterations and that those who did were special, and that played into why the aliens wanted them in the first place. I don't know. I scraped it because I didn't know where i'd want to take it. I guess the show, at least for me, was very predictable. I knew Jimmy was going to die in the first episode of season 2, I'd sort of been waiting for it all season 1...I knew that Hal and Maggie were going to be hooking up the scene where they first met, and I knew something would be happening to Karen. I got to say, I really hated that the episode after Jimmy died, they introduced Weaver's daughter. I almost stopped watching then and there, but I persevered ten minutes into the next episode. Ben pointed his gun at his father to defend Jimmy's killer, and I was done. I've ranted about this before too. Oh well. I meant to comment on your revelation about a Jimmy/Maggie fic. You know, I try not to judge other people's pairing choices, but seriously, ew. As for Maggie/Hal, and this may reveal too much of where I might intend for this fic to go or not go with their characters, but I never liked the pairing from the start. The age gap didn't bother me, so much as make it far less realistic for me. First Lourdes is about nineteen, she's older than Hal and that was slightly difficult to swallow her having a crush on him, but then not one but two older women having a crush on him? Maybe it's because I don't find the actor all that attractive, probably because i hate the character, I just can't fathom either of those women wanting him. Maggie, especially, she's been to prison, survived cancer and drug addiction, and had a kid (only know most of these tidbits through word of mouth, so I might confusing details), she's been in the world and a bright eyed, innocent little boy wouldn't really do it for her. The only way I can rationalize it is that having been raped, she's looking for someone safe, but given Maggie's personality, she's tough as nails, I find that doubtful. Personally, I would've preferred a romance between her and Dai, or her and Anthony (emphasis on Anthony) but maybe that's just me. One of the last scenes I watched in the show, Hal and Maggie are hiding in the back of a car from a Mech, which by the way, bad time to be feeling up on one another yet somehow Hal manages, but then Hal starts talking about some girl he dated before the war and how hot she was, not exactly how I'd ever want a guy to come on to me, and then the scene ends with Maggie reminding him that he's technically still got a girlfriend, "Karen who?". Yeah. Why the fuck would she ever go for a cheese ball, ass hat like him? It kills me that it's such a popular pairing, because I really liked Maggie's character. And, end rant.
Right, bad news time. There might not be an update next week. I still recommend checking in just in case, but...yeah. Time's are rough. Thanks for stopping by, and I'll (maybe, probably not) see you next Sunday.