AN:- Yay! Dinner scene!

Chapter Fifteen: Reunion

"That Primarch's got some real cajones. What we need are more politicians like him. Taking names and kicking ass."

Garrus chuckled. "Victus has definitely picked up that reputation. And it's well earned from what I've seen."

"Will the Primarch not be joining us for dinner?" Chakwas asked from the other end of the table.

"I extended the invitation. He preferred to remain in contact with his troops." Shepard shrugged. "I can understand the impulse."

"It's important to take time off, especially now in this sort of high tension situation."

"Turians respond to tension a little different than humans," Garrus told her.

"Yes, and you'd think I'd know that by now, all these years with the galaxy's most uncooperative patient."

"I thought that was the dear Captain?"

"Well she at least let me help with the rehabilitation of her scars. You seem to actually like them."

"Well I do think they give me a certain rugged charm."

Shepard grinned at the sparring. They weren't quite as many as had been gathered around the table before, but it was a group that seemed to gel well. Allers and Traynor had joined them, along with Jack, who was still in her wheelchair. Adams had sent a message apologising, but he and Joker needed to work on synching up some of the Normandy's finer systems after they had been knocked loose running from Cerberus.

"So tell us," Garrus said, shifting his attention. "What's Jack like as a teacher? How do you keep the runts in line?"

"It's a little bit of love, a little beat of fear, and a whole lotta ass-whooping."

"You beat the children?" Liara's eyes had gone wide.

"Not literally. They just need a bit of a kick to get them moving sometimes. Leave them to it and they'd be happy to stay where they're at, but I know they can do better." She was more animated than Shepard had ever seen her. "Like Rodriguez, she didn't watch her shield and she took that bullet, but I know that she's got the power in her to hold back a missile, if she needed to. But she'd rather blow things up with flashy bolts. And Prangley's too timid. He was sparring with Rodriguez and one of this attacks hit her square on, she didn't even flinch it was so weak." She shrugged. "Either that or he likes her."

"I'd hate being in charge of a bunch of hormonal time bombs," Vega said. "That's gotta be some kinda hell."

"I get it. I get that frustration they feel. All they need is someone to talk to every once in a while, and someone who knows when to get tough with them."

"They're going to need someone to talk to after what just happened," Liara said. "So many dead."

"I feel terrible about leaving you there like that," Cortez said. He had been quiet for most of the meal, but he was at least there."

"I did order you to leave," Shepard said quickly.

"Yeah, doesn't make me feel any better. I'm just glad it worked out."

"It's not even that," Jack said, setting down her fork and staring at the plate. "Rodriguez had to kill two of those troops, and Jakob as well. It's no easy thing."

Shepard still remembered her first human kill. A border rebel who had jumped her squad. She had blacked out and could only remember seeing him leap out and seeing him then on the ground. Most specifically she remembered throwing up the moment they got back to base.

Around the table looks were being exchanged, sombre and quiet. Traynor shifting uncomfortably in her seat, while Allers looked curious. Garrus leaned forwards in his chair. "One of the worst parts of this war is the kids. If they're lucky they grow up thinking the galaxy is basically a decent place. Some rough spots here and there, but for the most part, life makes sense. Now. They find out it was all a lie. They wake up to see these things in the dark that just want to destroy everyone they ever cared about."

"It's better for them," Jack said. "I've killed…" She shook her head. "Too many. But they killed the right people for the right reasons. They can get through this."

They sat in silence for another minute, all contemplating their meals, until Garrus sat back and with forced cheer said, "looks like we beat Cerberus again at least. Do you think the Illusive Man fires lieutenants over failures like this? Or just lines them up against a wall and gets it over with?"

The dark humour seemed about right for the situation. Jack barked out a laugh, and everyone picked up their cutlery again to keep eating.

"So, Anderson and Sanders," Vega said. "That's quite a couple."

"There's a story there I wanna know," Shepard admitted. "She knew him back when he was in contention to be a Spectre. I looked up the report, what wasn't classified was a fascinating read."

"How so?"

"I think the mission Anderson took, where he and Sanders met. I think that was where Saren found Sovereign."

"Damn." Garrus shook his head. "It goes back all that way."

"It seems like a lifetime ago that that was our biggest concern," Liara said.

"What was it like?" Allers asked. "I've read all the reports but there's almost nothing in them."

"It…" Shepard rubbed her chin as she thought out her answer. "Things got out of control so quickly. I was told I was on a shakedown run for the new Normandy system, and then suddenly there's a turian Spectre on board. Everything just seemed to happen to us and we were always on the backfoot."

Garrus nodded. "I was told some ambassador had complained about Saren, and I was supposed to be looking into him. I thought the best option for my investigation would be linking up with Shepard, and then before I know it we're discovering a planet that's been lost for fifty thousand years and uncovering a threat to the galaxy."

"Simpler times," Jack drawled.

"No," Garrus said. "Actually this is simpler. We have to fight the Reapers. Everyone agrees, everyone believes us. This is war. It's going to be a hard one, but a fight is a fight. No more hiding in the dark."

"I'll say," Allers said. "I transmitted everything I could about Grissom Academy over Battlespace. The response has been immediate. Cerberus going after kids? That's turned the public in a big way."

Shepard hadn't been sure about Allers. She liked her well enough but she was automatically distrustful of reporters. But she had reviewed the Grissom Academy report before it went out. Allers had actually cut things that Shepard insisted she put back in. The public needed to know the full extent of what Cerberus had done.

Traynor was staring at Allers. Allers clearly noticed, giving her a smile that would have melted butter. "Yes Specialist?"

"I have to ask, do all war reporters look so… feminine." Shepard quickly covered a grin, looking over to see Liara doing the same. Clearly Traynor didn't get out much. "I mean you're made up so well."

Allers nodded. "We actually have a research department for that. They focus test looks, voice, manner. Apparently, girly is good. Asari pay more attention, salarians relate to high pitched voices."

"And turians?" Garrus asked. Shepard wondered if Allers would recognise the expression on his face, which she had always equated to a human raising an eyebrow.

"Turians are nuts!" Allers said with a laugh. "A civilisation of war nerds. Loyal viewers, but they write the creepiest fan mail."

Jack laughed at that. "You hear that Garrus. You and yours are all so hot for a steaming hot barrel pumping lead."

Garrus turned to look at her, leaning back in his chair. "You know, life just wouldn't have been complete if I didn't see you one more time. It's nice to see you've downgraded from 'dangerous lunatic' to 'mildly insane.'"

The old Jack would probably have leapt the table to attack him. The new Jack grinned viciously and jabbed a fork at him. "Don't push it turian. I could still take you."

"Well I have to admit, you did see through Cerberus back in the day. I might have even listened but your tattoos gave me a headache every time you walked into the room."

"Screw you Vakarian."

They were nearly done with their food. It wasn't the high quality Shepard had come to expect from Gardner, but it wasn't simple boil in a bag MREs either. She still couldn't quite get over the idea of having an actual kitchen on an operational military vessel. But she was certainly appreciative of it.

Garrus was talking again. "I wish they'd had a Grissom Academy for turians when I was growing up. Always wanted to learn how to paint. Now I mostly paint walls with Reaper blood. Not the same, but it's a living."

"You know, I've never thought of that," Vega said. "They don't have turian biotics?"

"They do, but they're very rare. Most of the military don't like them. I hear Victus has recalled all of the cabals to Palaven though, to aid the defence."

"Cabals?"

"Special units of biotic turians. We tend to clump them all together. Guess the situation really is dire enough now."

"You're pretty tight with the new Primarch," Jack said.

"We fought together on Menae."

"How'd you even get back in? Thought they'd have kicked you out for the whole Cerberus thing."

"I still had some pull on the chain of command. Called a favour or two. I knew I needed to get into the thick of it."

"I'm very glad you did," Liara said. "If only the asari were as willing to listen to the truth."

Jack snorted. "Well they're definitely listening now."

/|\

"Hey Shep?" Jack was wheeling herself into the elevator, heading back to her quarters. Shepard looked over from the table.

"Yes Jack?"

"Thanks for this. It was… nice."

"You're always part of the crew Jack."

It looked like she was struggling with a response, but she finally wheeled herself around and muttered, "thanks."

Shepard grinned as Jack got onto the elevator. Liara had already headed back to her quarters, but they were going to meet up again later. She was interested in Garrus' story.

"Shepard," he said as she walked in. He was still calibrating the guns, not even needing to look back to know it was her.

"So come on Vakarian, spill it," she said, leaning against the table he stored his armour on. "How'd you get back in?"

Garrus sighed, turning and leaning against the opposite table. "How much did I tell you about my father?"

"Ex-C-Sec. Didn't exactly approve of some of your choices."

"To put it mildly. Did I tell you about the last time we spoke? Before you collected me on Omega?"

"I don't think you mentioned that."

"I realised, after my team was massacred…" He sighed and looked away, searching for the words. "It's about the bigger picture sometimes. I get caught up in the details, I always have. Makes me a good cop, but I miss the context of what I'm doing. I called my father back then, just before you showed. He said that I should come back to Palaven and we would talk it all out."

"But you didn't."

"Well we had a galaxy to save. Again. But after, when you dropped me at Omega and went back to face the music. I went back to Palaven, like I said I would. And I found that I had lost any influence I might have had. All my work as Archangel, all my work with you, and under Cerberus… I don't blame them for kicking me out on my ass."

"So how did you do it then?"

"I did something I never thought I'd do. I talked to my father."

"That must have been a hell of a conversation."

"It wasn't as bad as I was expecting. We didn't really talk before we got straight down to business. He still had heavy pull in the turian government. The old Primarch was a friend of his. So I told him everything."

"About the Reapers?"

"The Reapers, sure, but I went right back. From Saren to the Collector Base."

Shepard raised her brow. "Honestly? I'm not even sure I'd believe us at this point."

"I'm not sure if he believed every single bit. Talking to Vigil? Finding out what Sovereign was, his control over Saren? But see, that's the thing about my father. He puts the details together and sees the big picture. That's what made him so effective at C-Sec. He sat, and he listened, and he put it all together, and probably the way I was saying it and the words I used and a hundred other things I didn't even think about."

"And?"

"The connections were there. And he wouldn't deny them. He believed me that the Reapers were real, and they were coming."

"It must be nice to have someone believe you."

"He did more than believe. The minute I finished speaking he called up the Primarch."

"Direct. I see where you get your style from now."

"Except the Primarch wasn't convinced. But my father kept pushing. That's how I ended up with a token task force. Just enough to shut me up and get me out of their way."

"So what did you do when you were out of their way?"

"All the sorts of things that you can do when governments aren't looking at you. There's emergency stockpiles across the colonies. Hardened lines of communication. Anything and everything I could think of."

Shepard nodded slowly. "I remember how it was back on Earth when they hit Garrus. Even having that extra ten seconds of communication might have saved lives."

He shrugged. "I'd like to think that too. I guess we'll know when the war is over."

He went back to the console, but she wasn't done quite yet.

"You've always given it to me straight Garrus. What do you think our chances are? Honestly?"

"I know it looks bad now, but I think we can win this Shepard. We're not alone in this anymore."

"The asari and salarians still aren't on our side."

"But it's not just us and this one little ship this time. All your human allies, and the turians. And I'm willing to bet the krogan will be behind you too." He turned and gave her a grim smile. "It's something I learned long ago in C-Sec. An imminent and painful death has a way of motivating people." The smile turned from bitter to something a bit more cheerful. "And besides, you're a bona fide Reaper-killer now. Whole civilisations are going to be clamouring at the chance to have you save them."

"I'm glad you think so highly of me."

"Official Vice-President of the Commander Shepard Fan-Club, remember?"

That got a chuckle out of her.

"The only concern I have is that humans undertake war in a very different way than the turians. We're taught from birth that if just one survivor is left standing at the end of a war, then the fight was worth it. But humans want to save everyone. In this war that's not going to happen."

"We know how to make sacrifices Garrus."

"Do you? Shepard I've watched you run into more hopeless situations than I can count, and you've done it to make sure every one of your crew came back alive. Speaking as one of your crew I appreciate the effort, but you have to be sure you won't stretch yourself too far and too thin. All of humanity has to be aware of that. Know when to pull back, when to retreat to an advantageous position and sacrifice the lives needed to do so."

She felt compelled to defend herself. "If we stop trying to save our people then we start to look like the machines, judging things on some assigned points of value. All life has worth."

"And I would never argue against that. But sometimes to save the billion lives you have to sacrifice a thousand. And I'm just not sure you can do that. I mean come on Shepard I've seen you wade into domestic disputes and shoplifting cases and try to fix clerical errors just to make sure no one has to suffer if you can do something to help them."

"And that's wrong?" She didn't quite know how they got here but they were a foot away from each other now, both yelling.

"It's wrong because you need to start seeing the big picture. You need to stop focusing on the all these irrelevant concerns and realise that you need to save the galaxy!"

"The galaxy is nothing but details. It's all the little details and people in it that make it worth saving. I thought you'd have learned that from your father by now."

Garrus stood suddenly ramrod straight, glaring down at her. When he spoke it was with a measured calm that was almost cold. "I think you should go."

She took a deep breath and closed her eyes, trying to push her temper down again. "I'm sorry Garrus. I shouldn't have said that."

He didn't respond, only turned back to the computer. She sighed and left, heading back to Liara's office.

AN:- Ooh, tension!

This chapter is a bit of a weird mix between canon conversations and stuff I made up. Chalk up another weird google search for writers 'what does it feel like to kill someone in combat?' At least three responses to that question I found said that they couldn't actually remember the actual kill, so that's what I went with.

Originally There was going to be a two part dinner, the students of Grissom Academy would be at the first one, then they would leave and the adults would have slightly more grown up talk, which is where Garrus' line about the Illusive Man offing his lieutenants would come into play. Then that just got a bit too complicated to write and I was either going to end up with a dijointed 6000 word chapter or a really lacklustre bit with the students, so I cut the whole thing down to size.

It is my mission to include at least one reference to MREs (Meals Ready to Eat) in every Mass Effect fiction I ever write.

The ending turning into a Shepard/Garrus argument just kind of happened. As I was writing it I realised I was hearing their voices as being raised in my head. Obviously Garrus' anger comes from concern and fear, not actual anger, and Shepard's kind of comes from her uncertainty that he might be right. All throughout Mass Effect a Paragon Shep has definitely started to tack towards being a Death Seeker. Not outright suicidal, but certainly putting him/herself into situations where death is a more likely outcome. My Shep definitely started to show that back at the end of ME2, after being run ragged for so long, but in ME3 it's like this constant downward spiral.

Cheerful stuff. On to the Citadel!