As Kailee stuffed her face with food, Ace sighed. "How long is she staying here again?"
"She's staying here until another swirly vortex poops itself into her presence!" Kailee huffed. "Yes, poop, not pop."
"Also, food is BAE! Momma can't cook squat, so I'm taking you back to my world with me!" Kailee pointed to Thatch.
"Uh..." Thatch frowned. "I don't understand."
"Your food is delicious, you are now my slave!" Kailee summarized.
"WHAT?!" They all yelped.
"I'm kidding, geez! But I'm still getting take out," Kailee said.
"Okay..." Thatch trailed off.
Okay, so Kailee knew Whitebeard had his crew keeping an eye on Teach, but you know that feeling that if you don't do it yourself, something's gonna go wrong?
Yeah, that's what she was feeling.
Kailee gave Teach the hairy eyeball every time the guy was in her sights, and she sure as hell hoped that his avoidance of her was because he was nervous.
Oh, he better be fucking nervous 'cause Kailee motherfucking Wolf is here to kick some bad guy ass!
In her eyes, Kailee couldn't understand why none of the ship had realized Teach was up to something. The guy just looked way too suspicious!
Maybe that was because Kailee already knew what he was really planning but whatever!
Kailee got shivers when Thatch announced he'd found a Devil Fruit. The thing reminded her of bad things.
"Death Fruit!" Kailee squeaked and tackled the man, ripping the nasty fruit from Thatch's grip. "Are you insane?! Do you want to die?!"
"Wha-?" Thatch paused as the back of Kailee's shirt was grabbed and she was pulled backward off of Thatch.
The person who had picked her up was none other than Izou. "Hi, Izou!"
Izou stared at her before sighing. "What are you doing?"
"This thing will be the downfall of the world, and I will be its savior!" She announced.
"And how are you going to do that?" Izou asked.
"First step! Ace, get your flaming hot cheeto ass over here and incinerate this thing! Stat!" The girl barked.
Izou shook his head and let the female go while Thatch gently pried the fruit from her hands. "I don't think so. These things are worth a fortune. I found it, I'll decide what to do with it."
"Death!" Kailee screeched like a banshee. "You people are psychos!"
Thatch shuffled away, muttering, "Have you heard yourself talk?"
Kailee quietly held her pipe. She had found the thing in the ship's storage area and figured if Ace, Luffy, and Sabo had used them, Kailee could, too.
"I am a ninja, a stealthy assassin, waiting for my target to make his move, then I will strike!" Kailee whispered quietly. "Maybe I should stop talking."
She stood in the shadows as she watched Thatch and Teach speak. When she saw Teach pull a knife from behind his back, Kailee lunged, jumping from her perch and landing on Teach's head. "Da da da da da da da, Batman!"
She swung her pipe and knocked Teach on the head, rendering the man unconscious, allowing him to drop the knife.
She picked the knife up and chucked it overboard. "Mission Save Thatch From Backstabbing Bastard: Completed! Mission Tell Ace That If I Wasn't Here, Bad Things Would've Happened: Assigned!"
"I was going to save him, you just beat me to it," Ace's voice sounded behind her. "Why were you out here anyway?"
Kailee turned around. "You know that feeling that something will go wrong if you don't do it yourself?"
"Yeah," Ace nodded.
"That's what I was feeling," Kailee shrugged.
"What...the hell?" Thatch muttered. "What is going on?!"
"Oh, story time! Get comfortable, Thatchy! This is gonna take a while!" Kailee laughed.
"You're an angel?" Thatch asked.
"Is that all you got?" Ace groaned.
She grinned. "Why thank you for noticing!"
"Let's go to Alabasta," Kailee said.
"What? Why?" Ace asked.
"Because originally, you chased after Teach to hunt him down after he killed Thatch. You met up with Luffy and his crew in Alabasta!" Kailee smiled.
"..." Ace stared at her.
"Okay, fine! I want to meet Luffy and his crew!" Kailee cried.
"..."
"Please!"
"..."
"Pretty please! I'll do anything! Oh, I got it! I'll recite a fanfic I remember-"
"To Alabasta we go!"
The girl didn't know why she expected more from the Second Commander. After all, she had seen what he'd been riding in when he'd met up with Luffy in Alabasta. She should've known it wouldn't have been much different even if she was going with him this time.
"A dinghy?" She raised an eyebrow, but while she was curious, she wasn't all that surprised.
Ace shrugged. "Yeah, so? It's not like we need a bigger boat anyways. Besides, why are you complaining? You're the one who wants to meet Lu so badly, and you were perfectly fine with the boat Marco and I took you on before."
"Okay, first of all, I'm not complaining. I'm merely curious. Second, I know you, Ace, and you want to see Luffy as much as I do, even if you won't admit it out loud," she smiled at him, amused. "It's been a while since you've seen your brother."
Ace rolled his eyes and huffed. The dimension traveler was surprised he didn't breath fire. "Your point? Lu's annoying and stupid, even if he's my brother. I love him, but missing him is a stretch."
She smirked and shook her head. "Tsundere~!" The female sung, giggling.
Ace turned red as fire licked at his bare shoulders. "Oi! Who are you calling a tsundere?!"
"You. Are you deaf or what?" She smiled at him, jumping into the boat and plopping down.
Ace's face looked like it could match Luffy's vest. "It's still not funny!"
"Oh~, but it is, Ace~! It's hilarious!" She purred, laughing at his easily-triggered temper. "Calm down and come on! We're wasting daylight, Pyro!"
Ace rolled his eyes, but his skin tone returned to its original color. "Yeah, yeah."
Ace would never say it out loud, definitely not to her face, but she was beginning to feel like an annoying little sister. He couldn't stop the smile that spread across his face when she wasn't looking.
Ace does not want to hear anymore of her Devil prayers. The ones on the boat were enough for him. Bye my doggies!