(A/N: If you're thinking their slogan seems familiar, don't you worry, I plagiarized myself. I also hope you're all continuing to enjoy this. Poor baby Pelleas.)
Dear Diary:
"Welcome to the Greil Mercenaries. Who do we need to punch for you?"
That is their slogan, I can't even.
Isn't that delightful? I love it. Even though Ike forgot who I was. I tried to pretend I forgot who he is, but it didn't work. I have a very good memory. Let's see, Ike, Soren… uh, Crimson War Goddess… Misty, Boy, Oscar the Grouch, Rolfe, and the Drunkard Duo. Oh and Mia! We got drunk once, it was delightful.
Anyway, I officially hired all of them to come to my wedding. The DD were pretty mad that they RSVP'd no to begin with, and were insistent that the team go now that they were being paid to go. Everyone else agreed, as money makes the world work. Between them and Volke, Micaiah is going to have to put me on an allowance due to my flagrant spending. I can make that work though, so the joke's on her. I'm awesome at finances.
Ike looked pretty angry, which fits what I've been told about him – he's not a fan of the fancier things in life. Soooo I should probably tell him what's going on. Okay, let's go…
Found him, he was doing exercises. Phew, I kinda get the existence of the We Love Ike Club that existed during the war. Anyhow. Okay, he's noticed me, transcription time!
Me: Hi Mr. Ike, I wanted to talk to you a bit more about what I'm doing here.
Ike: Why were you staring at me?
Me: Nothing. I hired you all to come to the wedding because it turns out that Soren is my mother's actual son, and I want them to meet.
Ike: I knew it!
He's explaining to me now how he figured it out, and if I were Soren I'd be pretty offended (it comes down to "Soren can be kind of a ruthless pragmatic jerk just like Ashnard and that dragon king with the sneeze name") so it does add credence to my mother's claim of maternity, kind of. Anyway, now he's excited, although I'm not sure if it's because he's right, or because he's getting Soren a mother.
Doesn't matter, my plan has succeeded! A future with less maternal crushing, coming right up! I can't wait to go home!
Love, Pelleas the Successful