Note: I just wanted to say a sincere thanks to everyone who left feedback and provided support on the last chapter. It means so much that you took the time to do so. Thus, I extend my gratitude to TinDog, Barb, EastBlue, Red Hardy, EvergreeenDreamweaver, hbndgirl, Guest, ulstergirl, Paulina Ann, max 2013, BeeBee18, Hero76, and Caranath.I hope you continue to read and enjoy, and don't worry- while Johnny really is gone, it is absolutely not the last you will hear from/ about him. :)

The Secret Spaces

Chapter 18

Joe's mouth fell open and he felt his heart skip a beat. "Wh-what?" he whispered. But the look on Frank's face spoke volumes.

Frank wiped his eyes. "Joe, I have to go," he managed to get out. "Just- I need to take care of some things. For Johnny." He tried to calm his pounding heart. "Can you talk to Collig for me- please? I- I'll have to catch up with you in a little."

"He died?" Joe whispered. He felt sick. No... no. He must have misheard. Not Johnny.

Frank nodded slowly, still reeling. "It's like he held on… 'til he saw me. He was okay and then it's like… like he crashed...I'm glad I was there. I wouldn't have wanted him to be alone. Joe, please. I…."

"Go," Joe agreed, in shock himself. He leaned over and hugged Frank tightly. "I'm so sorry," he added in a low voice. And he really was, more than he could even process. The famous actor who was really just Callie's best friend had died protecting her; protecting Vanessa.

"No," he whispered as he watched Frank walk away, hunched over and wiping back tears.

He couldn't even think of revenge. Right now, he couldn't think anything at all as he felt numbness clutching him tightly. And it wouldn't let go.

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Frank retreated to Callie's room where, mercifully, her parents were absent. While he loved his in laws, he couldn't face them- he couldn't face anyone- right now.

He walked to Callie's bedside and took her hand. How could he tell her about Johnny? It would absolutely kill her. And she was barely holding on herself at this point. He sat down on the chair beside her bed and reached his other hand over to gently move her hair back from her forehead.

In all the years they'd been together, he had seen her in a hospital exactly twice. Once, years ago, had been as a result of a case she had gotten involved in, but that time had resulted in a true breakthrough in her relationship with Joe. Another time had been when she had broken her wrist on a skiing trip with him, but that had resulted somehow in a romantic and sweet weekend where they were stuck indoors, and it had been the weekend that he had come to finally decide that he wanted to marry her at last. Both times had been bad, but had yielded excellent outcomes. How could he even pray for that to happen this time?

He didn't know what to do; what to think. All of his life, he had conditioned himself not to cry; to be the strong one who held everything together for everyone. In the past week or two, he had cried more than he thought possible. And though Joe had been incredibly supportive, he knew that his inability to control his wildly swinging emotions was throwing Joe's game off, too. Like it or not, his job had always been to protect his brother and to be the logical, steady force against the whirlwind of his brother's large personality. And it had always worked- until now.

He needed to ground himself and for his world to stop spinning. He wanted to have someone help him, but who? He could definitely talk to Joe, but he would still be a mess right now, and Joe didn't need that. He wished more than anything that he could speak to his dad- but he couldn't, and the thought that he could be hurt or… or dead… literally caused him pain. His mom was being very strong, but he knew she was terrified about his father, and that, deep down, even she relied on him to be the steady rock. He knew he could talk to Vanessa, but he wasn't ready to do so-not yet- she simply didn't know him as well as he would have liked; at least he now knew that he could change that relationship in the future. His in-laws were barely holding on, terrified for Callie and the baby. He absolutely would have talked to Johnny, whom he had come to think of almost as a second brother; certainly a member of the family at the very least. Johnny had been so vitally important to Callie, and, in many ways, to him. He couldn't think about that now. Johnny was gone. So he found himself talking to the one person he told everything to, the person who would have understood, the person he loved more than he could ever put into words.

"Hey, sweetheart," he said to Callie, rubbing her hand. "I know you can't hear me, but I hope you know I'm here. Cal, I don't know what to do. I'm lost. For the first time in my life, I feel out of control. I feel so damned guilty that this happened to you and not me, that I couldn't protect you. And I'm so sorry, baby. I couldn't- I still can't- protect anyone, and I can't control my guilt, fear, sorrow… rage. How do I get myself together? This isn't me. Or is it? I don't even know anymore. I can't believe that less than two weeks ago, life was so normal. God, I'd give anything to have that time back. I'd never take a single second for granted." He paused, somehow feeling ever so slightly better getting his emotions out.

"Babe, Vanessa's okay. Do you know that? She made it. But dad's missing and I'm scared. I… I feel like I can't solve the most important case in my life, and, if I do, it'll be too late. And then…" he took a deep breath before going on, "Johnny died, Callie. I'm kind of glad you don't know that now, but I think I should tell you. He told me how brave you were. Of course you were- you're always brave. He knew that as much as I did. So was he- he was so brave, too. He saved your life, honey. That's how much he loved you. And he told me to tell you how much he cared about you before he...left. And he saw you through -". His voice broke. He would not and could not think of that now. God. His poor angel. How many bad things could happen to a person in one lifetime? "So you need to be okay, Cal, because that's the only thing that mattered to him. So be okay- for Johnny."

Frank leaned over and kissed her lips lightly. He continued to hold her hand and reached over and placed his other hand on her stomach, trying to ignore all of the monitors, the IVs, and other machinery that was literally helping Callie fight for her life. "Please, baby. I can't do this without you. I need you. I need our little one to be okay, and I can't guarantee that if I don't have you. If you are okay, everything else will be, too. You and this precious baby are my life, and I love you more than you will ever know. Please come back to me."

He closed his eyes, continuing to hold her hand; to rest his other hand on her stomach, reassuring himself that his child would be a survivor, too, like his or her mommy. Soon he dozed off, the stress of the day overwhelming him.

He had no idea how long he was out, only that he was awakened by the gentlest touch on his hand, the faintest mention of his name. When he opened his eyes, he found Callie half-staring at him, tears in her eyes.

"I'm back," she whispered in the weakest voice, touching his hand lightly, before her eyes closed again...

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Joe made his way to the hospital meeting room where he and Frank were supposed to meet with Collig. He was a few minutes early, and was grateful for the reprieve.

Johnny was dead. He was dead. How was that even possible? He found himself wiping back tears of his own. He'd known Johnny for about five or six years now, and he couldn't have pictured a more generous, fun-loving, or easygoing person. He'd really gotten to know Johnny when Frank and Callie had gotten engaged, and, even now, in the midst of this horrific news, he had to smile when he thought about the insanity of the bachelor party he'd planned with Johnny. And then his own bachelor party that Johnny had helped Frank plan that somehow, against all odds, ended up being crazier than Frank's had been. That's when he'd first started spending a lot of time with him.

He used to tease Johnny all the time about faking being gay, because the guy had more girls falling over him than Joe had even met in his life. At first, he hadn't been kidding, and really had thought that Johnny was just claiming to be gay to get close to Callie- because Johnny loved Callie-adored her- that much was clear. But Frank had always trusted him, and for Frank to trust anyone with Callie, much less a guy, was unheard of. And, of course, Johnny's presence initially annoyed him, because not only was Vanessa obsessed with him, and Callie spent inordinate amounts of time with him, but also because, as he grew to be very close with Callie, some part of him felt a little, weirdly, jealous of Johnny- as though Callie was his sister and Johnny didn't deserve such insights into her life.

But he had been very wrong. Johnny was one of the nicest, funniest, wildest people he'd ever met. And he was, in fact, gay- but his sexuality was no more of an issue to Joe than Joe's was to him. He was as sweet as could be with Vanessa, humoring her with answers to her crazy star-struck questions for hours on end and taking her to meet any actor or actress that he knew that she wanted to see. He was fiercely protective of Callie, and it provided him with comfort, knowing Johnny would take care of her- and Vanessa-when Johnny was around and he and Frank weren't. Johnny had even struck up a fun friendship with Biff and their constant bickering over football and musical preferences drove everyone crazy, but, together, those two knew how to have a good time.

He briefly flashed back to his own wedding, and could see Johnny gracefully dancing with Callie and Vanessa, but, the minute some people started to recognize him, he had unobtrusively faded into the background, refusing to steal even a moment from the spotlight meant for him and Vanessa. And then, after the wedding and honeymoon, when everyone had left and he and Vanessa had started opening gifts, he had opened Johnny's card. To this day, he could picture the exact message: "I had a wonderful time tonight and was delighted to have been able to make your special day. Please accept my gift on the conditions that you tell no one- not even Frank and my girl Callie- and that you never mention it again- seriously. Don't even send a thank you card. If you do, I have pictures from both bachelor parties. Remember that. J/k. ;) Love to you both. John." And he had given a check so large it paid for the entire wedding and honeymoon... and then some. Tears burned his eyes now as he thought of that.

Yes, John Gellers was a classy, kind, generous, and, Joe now knew, incredibly brave and selfless person. And it wasn't fair that he was gone. What a tremendous loss to the world.

"I swear to you, Johnny, I will find your killer and make him pay," he whispered to the air. "Godspeed, my friend."

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Several minutes later, the door opened, and Joe saw Pat, another officer, two FBI agents, and a weak looking Chief Collig come into the room. When he saw Collig, he stood at once.

"Is it inappropriate to give you a hug, Chief, given the circumstances, or shall we stick to business as usual- your general disapproval of me as an impulsive, ignore -all -the- rules and generally get in your way, "play detective" kid?" He suppressed a smile.

Collig smiled. "You're really still an idiot, Joe," he said with fake reproach in his voice, as he reached over to embrace Joe quickly.

"And you seem to be back to normal," Joe replied with a small twinkle in his eyes.

Collig rolled his eyes as he sat down and motioned for the others to do the same. Before he said anything else, he looked directly at Joe. "We're gonna get your dad back, Joe. I promise you that, son."

Joe nodded, unexpectedly emotional. "Thanks, Chief."

"I mean it," he said earnestly. "Your dad's one of my best friends and cases don't get more personal than this. Where's Frank?"

"I don't know," Joe replied, and proceeded to fill Collig in on everything, up to Johnny's death. From his reaction, Joe could tell he'd been briefed about Callie and Vanessa, but not Johnny.

"I'm sorry, man," Pat said quietly, and Joe gave him a small smile.

"This has been a hell of a ride," Collig said. "I'm truly sorry. I'm also more than a little pissed that my friend is missing, his family has been through hell, and I was almost killed."

"It's shocking," Joe agreed.

"Too soon, Joseph," Collig answered, and Joe stared at him blankly. When he got it, he let out a small laugh. "I wasn't even being a sarcastic ass for once, either," Joe replied. "I've missed you, Chief."

Collig gave a quick, affectionate smile at Joe. "I think it's time to get down to business," he said. "I've been briefed about several things by Agents McClean and Jessop from the FBI and my own officers. Let us fill you in on what we know."

Agent Jessop spoke first. "We have studied surveillance cameras from the city and the set of Criminal Hunters from the day of the abduction. We were able to ascertain that the truck headed out of the city in a path that we now know was headed for Bayport. We currently have an APB out on the truck that was used in the abduction, although we have reason to believe that the criminals are split at this point."

"What do you mean?" Joe asked.

"I'll explain soon," Collig answered. "We believe there are several people involved in the plot here. You know about Alan Cotnig. Based on Vanessa's description, we believe he was injured in the fire at the jail and, as a result, was permanently scarred. We also have the names of several other people based on the reports from the show and digging through our own records. We are all going to need you-and your brother- to help us piece this story together."

"So where do we start?" Joe asked, completely attentive.

"Way back- at the beginning," Collig answered. "Call your brother- it's time to figure this mess out and find your dad."

Joe nodded. He took out his phone and texted Frank. Looking around the room, Joe saw the determination in everyone's eyes and realized he was working with some of the greatest minds around. A sort of calm descended on him. He knew in his gut that a break was about to occur, and he couldn't wait. He would avenge Johnny; make sure Callie and Vanessa were forever protected. And he would find his father, no matter what.

Frank opened the door and stepped inside. He stared right at Joe. "She's awake. Callie's awake," he whispered incredulously.

Joe gasped; felt almost weak with relief. Without thinking, he crossed the room and hugged his brother tightly.

"She's okay?" he asked, just to make sure.

"For now," Frank replied. He held up his hand quickly in greeting to the room.

Joe slung an arm around Frank's shoulders and looked into the room full of people waiting to get started on solving this case.

"Let's do this," he said. "Let's get dad back."

And, together with his brother by his side, for the first time, he felt hope.