Disclaimer: Sadly, I do NOT own the show "Lost". However, I do own my Original Character ( Kennedy White ), as well as her background, and her plot on the island.
Author's note: Long time no see everyone! SO SORRY that I haven't updated this story in forever. I've been wanting to work on this chapter for a very long time, but got caught up in my other fanfics and stuff like that. But I felt like I really owed this to you guys and hopefully you like it.
{Sayid's POV}
"Locke, where were you last night? Around sunset." I asked the man sitting in front of me. Jack didn't seem as convinced as I was about who attacked me, so I decided to ask around with everyone to find out where they had been when it all happened.
"Well, I'm afraid the only witness to my whereabouts was the boar that I was skinning for our dinner." The bald man replied, continuing to whittle on his stick, sharpening the end to a precise tip.
"I heard you were trying to send out a distress call. So it would seem, whoever attacked you has a reason for not wanting to get off the island." He added. I got down on one knee, intrigued to hear what else he had to say. "Maybe someone who is profiting from our current circumstances."
Every word made me feel that he was pointing the finger at one person in particular.
"And from what I've seen, you and Mr. Sawyer share a certain animosity."
"No, he has an alibi. Just before I was struck, he set off a bottle rocket, a signal that if worked out, was two kilometers away." I informed him. I didn't mention the conspiracy between Sawyer and the girl yet. "He couldn't had the time to move-"
"Unless he found a way to time-delay the fuse on his rocket." Locke suggested. It made sense, but I didn't take that redneck for a science guy.
"How could he have possibly-"
"Anyone who watches television knows how to improvise a slow fuse. Use a cigarette." The man cut me off again, clarifying his statement.
Sawyer smoked.
"Of course, if Mr. Sawyer hadn't thought of using that method. That girl he takes up to would have been another option." This time, Locke had caught my full attention.
"You think she might have something to do with this too?" I ask him urgently.
"Oh there's more going on between those two than idle chit chat. And this Kennedy, she's quiet, insecure. Wouldn't take much sweet talk from a charmer like Sawyer to have her brainwashed." Locke said thoughtfully. Then, he held out his knife with the handle facing me.
"Just in case there's a next time."
I hesitated before slowly taking the blade.
xXx
{Kennedy's POV}
I thought that staying at the cave was only going to be a one-night thing. However, after what happened with Sawyer today I wasn't sure if it was a good idea to go back to the beach. Though I didn't feel anymore comfortable being in the cave either. I felt like a nervous wreck. If he was going through the pictures in my suitcase, what else had Sawyer seen? And would he even give me my stuff back now if I asked for it? I wasn't sure which of the two that made me feel worse.
Jack gave me a fish and two bananas and urged me to eat. I wasn't sure how my stomach was going to react, but I did as he said anyway. Maybe it would make me feel a little better, I might not be as jittery.
God, what was wrong with me? Even after discovering that Sawyer had hidden my things away in his stash and Kate reading that letter, my feelings about him didn't change much. Sure, I was pissed at him for taking my stuff, but just thinking about him made the butterflies in my stomach flutter wildly. Why? Was there anything that he couldn't do wrong? He refused to give Jack Shannon's medicine when she really needed it. He had ruined the lives of three innocent people just to get money out of it. What else was he capable of?
I was sitting away from everyone else, even a good distance from Jack. I didn't want to be near Shannon, my mind in enough panic. I saw in the dim light of the fire, someone coming into the cave. My heart almost leaped out of my chest when I saw that it was Sawyer, but I didn't move from the spot I was sitting.
Just stay calm, Kennedy. Just stay calm. And don't stare at him!
I averted my eyes away from Sawyer who didn't even glance my way. I wasn't surprised, but I did feel somewhat neglected. I was so used to his attention even when I didn't want it. I looked around, trying to distract myself. Jack stood up from where he was searching through his bags of medicine. His eyes were locked on Sawyer. I felt dread creep up on me as the doctor walked toward the pool of water where Sawyer was filling up a bottle.
"Give me the inhalers. Now." I heard Jack though he was trying to keep his voice at a whisper.
I couldn't help it. Slowly, I looked back to the two men anxiously.
"Hell, I was wondering when you were gonna stop askin' nice." Sawyer brought the bottle to his mouth, but Jack threw a fist at him. Water flew and Sawyer was knocked down to his knees. I winced involuntarily. Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh shit. It was like a broken record going off in my head.
Others in the cave took notice of what was going on, Shannon's gasps became even more frantic. I thought I was going to puke.
Sawyer started to shake off the blow and stand back up.
"Hell, it's about time, cowboy. I've been tellin' you since day one we're in the wild. Didn't think you had it in yo-" Sawyer hadn't finished his sentence when Jack struck him again. This time, he hit him in the mouth. The collision echoed through the cave as the man was sent back onto the ground.
Again, I found myself wincing as if it were me being punched in the face. I was concerned for Sawyer at first, but he stayed on his knee for a moment. I saw a dangerous, threatening look in his eyes. He was fine. Now, I was worried about Jack.
"That all you got." The blonde tempted as he turned back to Jack. He wanted to be hit again and I thought he was going to get it.
The doc looked around at everyone, his shoulders rising and falling with his heavy breaths. He turned and walked away. The others in the cave eyed Sawyer as he set there for another moment. Then, his eyes met mine for a split second. I had to turn away. I was afraid to meet his blank gaze, that it may turn hateful.
Don't look at him again, damn it!
This time, I obeyed my much-smarter-than-me thinking voice and kept my eyes glued to the fire. I heard Sawyer get up and walk out of the cave. It was a struggle for me not to turn and watch his back disappear into the jungle. I stayed strong though.
xXx
Morning couldn't have came soon enough. As soon as there was enough daylight to come into the cave, I set out for the beach. I decided that I didn't like the cave. There were too many people and I didn't like the constant worry of the ceiling coming down and crushing me. My shelter wasn't much safer, but at least I had enough room to breathe. Maybe I just wanted to be at the beach because I knew Sawyer was there. I didn't want to let myself believe that though.
When I reached my shelter, I noticed how lonely it looked next to the empty space where Sawyer's tent once was. I ignored that thought and went to sit underneath the metal roof. For the first time, I felt that it was safe enough to reach into my pocket and take out my picture Boone had found. I carefully unfolded it to reveal the photo that had been taken right after my sister's graduation ceremony. That day seems like such a long time ago. My hair was its natural reddish-brown, long before I decided to color it with crimson dye.
I felt very protective over the picture, enough that I didn't want anyone else to see it. Boone and Jack had already gotten a glimpse of what my life once was, and I almost forgot Sawyer. I wasn't sure why he'd taken it out of my suitcase and I really didn't want to think about it.
I sat there for a while, just looking at the picture as if it would refresh some good memories. Still, they felt to far away. It was hard to recall a good day I spent with my family. It had been a very long time since I could go a whole day with my parents without my mother making even the slightest criticism. You'd think after a nineteen years of beating me down, my mother would realize that I knew I would never be my sister. But she just had to add one more comment, one more knife in the back.
Then, I began to wonder what my parents would think if they could see me now. Would they feel sorry for me being stranded in the middle of nowhere? Would they want me home? Or would they say that this is what I deserve for everything I brought on the family? I wondered what they would think of Sawyer? Oh, now there's a thought that sparked a mischievous, dark humor.
I wished that my parents could see me, their youngest daughter, infatuated with a man that was much older. Whatever money I had left when I boarded the plane, I'd bet that their skin would be crawling if they could've seen us together. Just imagining the horrified looks on their faces brought a satisfied smile to my lips. It almost made me forget how angry I was. Almost.
I'd contemplated whether or not to confront Sawyer about my suitcase. At first, I thought I'd have a chance at reasoning with him, that he would understand or at least feel sympathy. But I knew Sawyer better than that. If he didn't hand it over as soon as I found out, he wasn't going to give it up now. I couldn't think of a reason why he'd take it in the first place. There was nothing of value, I only had thirty bucks to my name in there. What was the point in him holding onto it?
I knew I'd never get the answer from questioning myself, though Sawyer's excuse wouldn't make much sense either. There was no way around it, facing Sawyer was inevitable. Hell, what was I going to say? Hey, sorry for punching you and not kissing you, but can I have my stuff back now? I could already see the smirk on his face, the smirk I so desperately wanted to knock off his face again. No, no. There wouldn't be any fighting this time. When I talk to Sawyer about my suitcase, I'm going to be calm and collected. I'm not going to snap. I'm not going to get angry.
No, you're just going to stand there like an idiot with nothing to say while he wears that cocky little smirk of his. And the war with my inner thoughts continues.
I sat under my shelter for a good while, refusing to think about anything for a bit. I just wanted time to be completely alone. No conscience or whatever that little voice was, though it was beginning to sound like my mother. I sat there drawing squiggles in the sand, finding tiny pieces of what might have been sea shells. Then, I thought for a few minutes about how there weren't many sea shells on the beach. There were chunks and broken bits littered all over the place, but no hole pieces. One thing that might have made the beach pretty or charming had been crushed nearly to dust by the ocean.
Looking out at the beach, my thoughts veered away from the sea shells and focused on the other survivors of the crash. They all seemed far away, though they might have been fifty yards or so from the very spot I was sitting. They were people just happy to be alive, working together to stay that way. I wondered if they'd seen Sawyer and me together. What might they be thinking? But they probably didn't even notice. There were too many things for them to do and worry about to bother with a person who barely existed.
It wasn't too long before I caught myself thinking about going to see Sawyer again. But I wasn't sure if I was brave enough, especially after yesterday. Maybe if I stuck to being calm, maybe it would go over smoothly. Besides, I hadn't tried asking yet. Hopefully it wasn't too late to try it. Carefully folding the photograph up and sticking it in my pocket, I got up and headed for Sawyer's shelter. The sun had only been up for a few hours and the sand was already getting hot to the touch. I tried to walk faster, but it didn't help and it just looked like I was kicking up the sand.
Calm and collected, I kept reminding myself this.
As I got closer, I could feel my legs turning into jelly. It was like I was feeling an adrenaline rush over something that hadn't even happened. I got this feeling when I punched Sawyer yesterday, but I hadn't felt my stomach act this way since the plane began to fall from the sky. I remembered to tell myself to stay cool and everything was okay. The trouble hadn't started just yet.
I was staring at my feet the whole way over to the shelter and when I was there I finally got the courage to look up. I stopped, the burning of the hot sand seemed to disappear quickly. There was Jack and Sayid dragging Sawyer in between them away from the shelter. Is Sawyer asleep? No, no he's out. Like, unconscious out.
If it weren't for Jack, it might have taken longer for me to realize something was wrong. Seeing Jack at the beach was so strange now that he'd taken up residence in the cave. Suddenly, everything clicked.
"What are you doing?" Kate rushed over and started trailing behind the three, but neither of the conscious two bothered to answer. "Jack!"
"This was Sawyer's choice, not mine." Was Jack's only reply as he and Sayid continued to drag Sawyer off towards the jungle.
"If you do this . . . " She trailed off.
I wasn't sure what they were going to do, but I had an idea. And I was afraid I was going to be right. My feet started moving again, following Jack and Sayid.
"Kennedy, wait." I felt Kate catch my arm as I hurried past her. I didn't want to wait, I couldn't wait.
"No!" I said louder than I meant to, jerking my arm free and not even looking back at her.
I didn't care if she took it the wrong way, maybe I wanted her to. I was tired of being nice, tired of everyone stepping all over me. I was mad as hell, and I was going to make sure everybody knew about it.
As I reached the thick foliage and tangled vines and roots of the jungle, I remained quiet. Jack and Sayid didn't see that I was following them yet as I stayed several yards back. There was a rampage in my head, my inner self spitting out anything and everything I could think of. How dare they, damn it! I have my own shit that concerns Sawyer right now. They have no right to drag him off when I have my own problems with him. Damn it! Jack thinks he's a bad ass around here now just because he gotta a punch or two in.
Finally, I forced myself to stop and take a couple of long, deep breaths. Getting too worked up and throwing myself into a panic attack wasn't going to help me. I anxiously shifted my weight, holding my hands on my hips like some angry wife awaiting her husband to come home. Calm down, Kennedy. Just calm down.
This started to work for a second until I looked up and saw Jack and Sayid again, seeing Sawyer's feet drag the ground. Fuck it! I stomped after them again, feeling the rage rekindle itself.
I followed them to a sort of clearing. Maybe they really didn't know I was trailing them or they pretended that I wasn't there. Either way, they'd know for sure now. As Sayid sat Sawyer against a thin tree trunk, Jack turned and spotted me. He seemed surprised, but quickly held up his hands as if to ward me off.
"Kennedy, you shouldn't be here."
"Why? What are you going to do?" I couldn't think about what I was saying, I just let it spill. I could feel my anger boiling as my eyes glanced back and forth between Jack and Sayid who was tying Sawyer's hands behind the tree.
"We're going to get him to tell us where the medicine is. Hopefully, we won't have to go too far." Jack answered as if he were trying to reassure me, but it only pissed me off more. Calm and collected. It was everything I could do to not start screaming.
"Too far? So, you're going to torture him?" The words tasted like dirt in my mouth.
"You saw how he was acting. This is the only way we can get him to give us the medicine. Shannon needs it." I knew Jack was right about Shannon.
It wasn't fair the way Sawyer refused to help her. Jack's words started to make sense and I felt my anger towards him fade. I didn't think this was right, but what if it was the only way. Maybe it wouldn't take much to convince Sawyer. There was still something that didn't feel right. This whole thing was wrong, but something made me very uneasy. Sawyer, being an asshole and possibly worse, surely wouldn't go so far as to jeopardize another human being's health.
Kennedy, are you forgetting that letter? No, no I wasn't. But that didn't seem right either. I don't know, this whole thing was messed up. But what could I do? Jack and Sayid already had their minds set on doing this.
"You won't let it go too far?" I asked as if the situation wasn't so sinister. My eyes stared into Jack's, desperation was no doubt an understatement.
"As long as he cooperates, it should be smooth sailing." The doctor didn't sound so sure. Sawyer wasn't the type to cooperate with anything that had to do with Jack.
"Jack, she needs to go." Sayid said as he finished tying Sawyer's hands.
I turned and glared at the dark-skinned man. Maybe I understood Jack's reasoning for this, but I had a good idea where Sayid's intentions were coming from. He was probably doing this for his own, sick pleasure. When Jack looked back at me, I could tell by the expression of his raised brows that he agreed.
"I'm not leaving." I said darkly.
Jack laid his hand on my shoulder in an attempt to reason with me.
"Kennedy, you really don't need to be here."
"And if I don't go, are you going to tie me to a tree too?" I shrugged his hand away. That seem to get the message across pretty clearly.
Shaking his head in defeat, Jack walked over to Sayid and the unconscious Sawyer. I stayed where I was, with my arms folded across my chest, waiting to see just how smooth the sailing was going to be.