A big thank you to everyone who has been following this story and a bigger thank you to my chum and Veve for leaving me reviews, you are the best!
And as I got told of last time for not putting a tissue warning on the last update, I thought I better do it this time.
This part comes with a tissue warning, you may cry or you may not but have a tissue ready just in case ha ha!
xXx
5 Days Later.
Joseph awoke in the early hours to the sound of Clarisse's voice on the baby monitor, looking towards it on her bedside table as he sighed. Climbing out of bed moments later he slipped on his robe and headed towards the nursery, standing in the doorway watching her as she rocked them slowly in the rocking chair.
A tear escaped his eye when he thought back to when Erica was 5 days old, she done the same thing as she's doing now. Whispering to Emma, telling her that everything is going to be ok, telling her that everyone loved her and would do her no harm. He looked down while closing his eyes, his heart breaking knowing that this time it has a different meaning.
"I know you'll never know or feel it, but your Mommy had so much love for you." She whispered as Joseph looked up at her "And I know that she would of done anything in her power to be here right now." Clarisse whispered while gently rubbing Emma's back as she fussed a little.
"We can tell her all about Erica as she grows up." Joseph whispered while walking in and crouched down beside them "Why don't you let me take over, you need to rest." He whispered putting his hands out to take Emma as Clarisse shook her head "Clarisse you need rest."
"I'm fine." She answered, not looking at him.
"Clarisse your Grandchildren need you, you can't get sick, not now." He whispered as she glared at him.
"I should of been here for my Daughter, but I wasn't." She snapped while standing up and put Emma back in her crib "She needed me and I failed her." She said covering Emma with her blanket "I am not going to let the same thing happen with Emma or any of my other Grandchildren." She whispered while running her hand slowly forward over Emma's head a couple times, brushing her hair forward.
"Clarisse, you're exhausted you need to rest." He whispered putting his hand on her back.
"Don't..." She said pushing his hand away while turning a little "Please just don't." She said, her eyes meeting his as he backed away.
She covered her face for a few seconds before walking away from him, disappearing out the room. He watched her then turned back to Emma as she lay sleeping in her crib, reaching his arm down he gently rubbed the back of her head as he rested his other hand on the back of the crib.
"Mom?" Pierre called from the doorway, slowly walking into Erica's study, scanning the room for Clarisse, seeing her by the window "Mom?" He said again as she looked up and over to him.
"It looks like she had the best spot for her office," Clarisse whispered while pointing out the window "Right in the view of where her children would play each day." She said folding her arms as Pierre stood beside her, moving the netting away to see the play area in the garden "Children's laughter is the best way to cheer someone up." She said with a sad sigh.
"I agree." He nodded and turned to her while letting go of the netting.
"Dad told me about this morning." He whispered as she looked up at him "We really don't want you to end up sick again Mom, not now, not when we all need you so much." He whispered as tears pricked his eyes.
"I am fine and I really wish people would just stop with the worry when we have more important things to worry about." She snapped and looked at him "Like three beautiful children who have lost their Mom." She whispered, biting her tongue "And one of them didn't even get a chance to know her Mom." She whispered while looking down.
"I know Mom," Pierre nodded "We are all going to be there for them, and yes they are very important, but you are too and we can not have you getting sick." He whispered and watched her slowly look up at him for a second before turning back to the window "Mom?"
"Please leave." She whispered, not taking her eyes from the window.
As he headed over to the door to leave, Olivia appeared.
"It's time." She said softly and watched as Clarisse slowly turned to her.
Moments later they were all downstairs, heading out the door. Walking down the path to the waiting cars Aimie took hold of Joseph's hand as Arie took hold of Clarisse's. When Clarisse realized that there were people outside their houses watching she stopped, took a deep breath and slipped her Queen mask on. Joseph stopped as well, knowing full well what she was doing, he wrapped his free arm around her waist and gentle guided them the rest of the way to the car.
Opening the door Joseph waited while Aimie, Arie and Clarisse made their way into the back of the car. Once in Joseph laced his fingers with Clarisse's as she rested her head against his shoulder. "I can't do this again." She whispered "Why can't they just let us grieve in private?" She whispered while lifting her head then looked at Aimie as she took hold of her other hand.
During the service Arie and Aimie sat between Joseph and their Step Father, Shades, as Lena sat between Olivia and Clarisse. Lena held tightly to Clarisse's hand as Joseph rubbed one hand along her shoulder and arm while holding her other hand. The service was a heart breaking one, with many attending to pay their respects.
Back at the house Joseph stood in the doorway to the nursery watching as Clarisse fed Emma while standing by the window, crying softly to herself as she swayed back and forth a little. His heart broke even more when she started humming the song that she hummed to Erica when she was a baby, slowly walking over he put his hand on her back while putting his other hand up, placing it gently on the back of Emma's head.
"Clarisse?" He whispered and kissed the top of Emma's head, watching as Clarisse slowly looked away while shaking her head slightly, closing her eyes forcing tears to escape "Okay." He nodded kissing Emma's head again before walking out, leaving her to be alone with Emma.
Kissing her fingers a short time later as she blinked away tears, looking at her as Emma gazed up at her "You have your Mommy's big beautiful eyes." She said softly while placing her in the crib, leaning over it while stroking the back of her head watching as she drifted of to sleep moments later "She'd be so proud of you." She whispered softly.
Standing back Clarisse dabbed her eyes and slowly walked out of the nursery, pulling up the door as quietly as she could before turning to walk away. Only when she reached Erica and Shades bedroom door she stopped, looking down the hall towards the stairs to make sure know one was coming she slowly walked in.
Looking around with a soft sigh before moving and sat at her dressing table, seeing it all messy reminded her of her own back home. Scanning over everything she stopped when she saw a photo of herself holding Erica when she was a baby. Reaching over she took hold of it as she began to cry again, pressing it against her chest as she closed her eyes, where she sat crying to herself for a few moments.
Grabbing another tissue from the box on the dressing table she wiped her eyes with it before standing up, still holding onto the photo when she heard a sniff coming from Erica's closet. Slowly walking over she opened the door and lent against the door frame when she saw Arie and Aimie sat snuggled with Olivia.
"Oh my darlings." Clarisse whispered while slowly walking over and sat down beside Olivia "This is where you all disappeared too is it?" She asked as Aimie put her arms out for her, tucking the photo beside her before reaching over to take her.
"It smells like Mommy in here." Aimie whispered as Clarisse pulled her onto her lap and wrapped her arms around her, pulling her close.
"I know it does." Clarisse whispered against the top of her head as Aimie tucked it under Clarisse's chin.
"I still can't believe she's gone." Olivia whispered while looking down at her hands, starting to cry again.
"Neither can I sweetheart." Clarisse whispered and watched as Arie moved, sitting the other side of her "It will all be ok soon." She whispered putting her arm around Arie as he snuggled up to her "You just need to remember that she will always be watching over you."
"And Emma too?" Aimie asked while lifting her head.
"Yes sweetheart, Emma too." Clarisse nodded, unable to stop the tears again.
As they all started crying again Aimie snuggled back up to Clarisse.
"What happens now?" Arie asked a short time later.
"Well," Clarisse started as he and Olivia looked at her "You and Aimie will be going back home to Genovia tomorrow with your Daddy," She said watching Aimie sit up.
"Are you coming too?" Aimie asked as Clarisse reached over and brushed her hair back.
"Not tomorrow darling, but Grandma Ruth, Grandpa David, Uncle Pierre, Aunt Olivia, Uncle James, Aunt Cara and Aunt Lena are all going with you on my plane." She whispered and wiped away Aimie's tears.
"When will you come home?" Arie asked.
"In a few weeks, we need to stay here for a little while so we can bring Emma back with us." Clarisse said, feeling Olivia rest her head on her shoulder and extended her arm around her waist.
"Are we going to live with Daddy now?" Aimie asked.
"Yes you will." Clarisse answered sadly.
"But when will we see you?" Arie asked.
"I don't want to live with Daddy, I want to live with you." Aimie cried as Olivia lifted her head.
"I wish you could live with me, but it was your Mommy's wishes that if anything happened to her then you are to return to your Father." She said softly "But you can come visit every weekend and in your school holidays." She said looking at Arie then back at Aimie "Your Daddy and I talked about this already and he agreed that it will be ok that way."
"But we want to live with you Grandma." Aimie cried again.
"I know darling." Clarisse whispered while pulling her closer and wrapped her arms around her.
"When do we leave?" Arie asked.
"In the morning." Clarisse whispered and looked at him.
"Ok." Arie answered and looked back down as Aimie started sucking her thumb.
A short time later, Pierre's head popped around the corner.
"Here they are." He called out as everyone looked towards him.
"We've been looking for you everywhere." He whispered while walking over as Joseph appeared in the doorway.
"We just needed sometime." Olivia whispered as Pierre helped her up.
"It's alright." He said watching as Aimie and Arie stood up "Come on, let's go and see your Daddy." He whispered as Joseph moved into the closet a bit more.
"Come with us Olivia?" Aimie asked while taking her hand.
Both Clarisse and Joseph watched as they walked out, then Clarisse looked up at Joseph as he extended his arm out to her to help her up.
"Thank you." She whispered while taking his hand, pulling her up.
"No trouble." He whispered.
Looking at him for a second before she looked down and walked out, leaving him stood in the closet. Heading downstairs where she joined Ruth and David, talking for a while with them before going to start cleaning away things in the kitchen.
"When are you going to stop pushing me away?" Joseph asked from the doorway, taking her by surprise.
"I'm not." She said looking back down.
"Yes you are, and I hate it." He said slowly walking over to her "Please talk to me Clarisse."
"I don't have anything to say." She said slowly looking up as Olivia came in.
"Mom, Dad." She said as they both looked over at her "Shades is leaving."
"What?" Clarisse gasped and rushed out the kitchen with Olivia as Joseph followed.
"He's just gone to his car." Rose said from the front door, standing back as Clarisse and Joseph rushed out the door.
"Scott." Clarisse exclaimed and ran down the porch steps towards him as Pierre came out on the porch "Where are you going?" She asked as she stopped between him and the car door, stopping him from getting in.
"I just need some time." He said not looking up.
"What about the children? Your family?" She exclaimed as his parents made their way over to them.
"Come back inside, let's talk about this Son." Joseph said.
"I just need a little time," Shades said turning his head a little "And family? Arie and Aimie are leaving tomorrow with their Father."
"What about Emma? She needs you." Joseph whispered.
"She's already lost one parents Shades," Clarisse whispered while stepping closer, reaching her hands up and cupped his face "Don't let her lose another."
"She's not going to lose me, I just need sometime alone." He whispered and looked into Clarisse's eyes "I know Emma will be looked after by you and Joseph, that's all I ask." He whispered, watching the tears escape Clarisse's eyes "Please?" He whispered.
"She will be looked after, but please please please don't you dare stay away for long." Clarisse whispered as she started crying.
"I won't." He whispered back as she hugged him then stepped out the way "Thank you."
"You're let him go?" Joseph said looking at Clarisse as he got in the car.
Everyone stood watching as he drove away.
"Yes," Clarisse said putting her hands on her tummy while turning her head to the side "He just needs sometime alone." She said looking ahead again before wiping her tears away and turned to walk back in the house, stopping when Joseph grabbed her arm as everyone watched.
"What about Emma? He can't just disappear, he can't just walk away from her." He said as Clarisse tried pulling her arm free.
"He has every right to have some alone time." She said glaring at him as Olivia and Pierre looked at each other.
"He has a baby to look after Clarisse, or did you forget that?" He said getting angry.
"I will take care of her, he needs sometime Joseph he just lost his wife." She snapped.
"And what about us? We just lost our daughter, but do you see us running away?" He answered coldly.
She shook her head a little while looking down then slowly looked back up at him "I can't really say anything now can I? Seeing though when Rupert died, I ran away." She whispered as he let go of her arm "Yes you forgot about that, didn't you?" She snapped while looking into his eyes for a few seconds before walking past.
He turned and watched her walk away and back into the house, followed by everyone else.
Heading up to her room Clarisse sat on the chair, trying to calm herself down when Lena appeared. Pushing up the door behind her she walked slowly over to Clarisse sitting on the chair.
"Mommy are you okay?" Reaching out for her Clarisse pulled Lena into her lap holding her for dear life while trying to keep her emotions at bay as she remembered the last time Erica had surprised her and called her 'Mommy' just a few months ago.
After a few minutes Lena looked up at her but never taking her head from her shoulder, cupping Clarisse cheek so she could turn her head towards hers, Lena's sad brown eyes met Clarisse's blue puffy red ones and for a moment nothing was said they just stared at one another.
"Mom I know you are sad and I know that nothing will replace or fill the void in your heart that Erica has left but I want you to know that I'm here for you even if you just need a cuddle." Moving her hand Lena wiped the tears that escaped Clarisse's eyes as she pulled her even closer to her.
"I love you!" Clarisse whispered against her hair as she closed her eyes.