Massive thanks to Johanna-002 for her review on part 68 :) Thank you. And thanks to everyone else for taking the time to read it :)
This chapter is another sad one, I'm sorry.
xXx
One Week Later.
Though she had been awake most the night and heard him in the shower, Clarisse opened her eyes when she heard Joe moving around in his closet, sitting up she sat back against the pillows, playing with her necklace while waiting for him to enter back into the bedroom.
When he did, Clarisse looked over and watched him walk towards the door "Joe?" She said softly and watched him as he stopped to look over at her.
Looking for a moment before walking out without saying anything, closing the door behind him as Clarisse looked down and closed her eyes.
With a sigh she climbed from the bed, and after having breakfast alone she began to get ready. Wearing a black knee length dress, with a deep purple flowered scarf she made her way downstairs, where she stood fussing over the flowers on the table in the foyer when Olivia came in.
"Momma?" She said softly while closing the door as Clarisse looked over.
"Hello darling," She said putting her arm out to her as she made her way across the foyer to her "How are you today?" She asked, closing her arm around her.
"I'm okay at the moment." Livy answered, wrapping her arms around Clarisse's waist, resting her head on her shoulder "What about you?"
"Oh, I'm okay." Clarisse answered while rubbing Livy's back "I have to be really."
Lifting her head Livy looked at her "Not really... where's Daddy?" She asked.
"Probably down by the lake again." Clarisse answered as Olivia stepped back.
"Again?" She asked and watched as Clarisse nodded "Haven't you talked to him about any of this?"
"I have tried, trust me.." Clarisse said nodding while looking at the flowers "But he isn't interested, so I decided to step back and give him time." She said looking at her "He will talk to me when he's ready."
"Yeah, that's true." Olivia nodded.
"Where are the children anyway?" Clarisse asked while folding her arms.
"Oh they are out with Pierre and the dogs." She said watching Clarisse as she nodded.
"Okay." Clarisse answered and checked the time "Well... It's nearly time." She said softly while slowly looking up at her.
"I know." Olivia said sadly just as Joe came in. "Here you are." She said while looking over at him.
"I know I'm sorry, I went for a walk." He answered as Olivia gave him a hug "I'm just going to get changed and then I will be back."
"Okay Daddy." Olivia answered and watched him head up the stairs as Clarisse made her way across to the living room. Sighing she headed back outside to the others.
A short time later everyone gathered in the foyer as the horse drawn carriage pulled up outside with the cars following. Slipping on her jacket Clarisse slowly came back in.
"Shall I go and get Daddy?" Lena asked.
"No need." He said appearing at the top of the stairs, looking down at everyone before slowly coming down.
"Do you need a few moments?" Clarisse asked as he stood beside her.
"No," He said shaking his head "Rose hated it when we were late, so let's not be late for her today." He said looking towards the door as some of the family headed out. Looking back at Clarisse he reached over and took her hand while stepping closer and whispered in her ear "I'm sorry."
"You have nothing to be sorry for." Clarisse answered as he pulled his head back a little to look in her eyes.
Making their way down to the car, Joe stopped to look at the carriage in front of the car. Feeling Clarisse squeezing his hand he looked back at her as she lent forward.
"It will be okay, you have me." She whispered and watched him nodding.
"Thank you." He whispered and looked back at the carriage before climbing in the car seconds later.
The service was a sad one, there wasn't a dry eye in the church. Pierre talked a little about his sister and Lena read out a poem that she knew Rose loved, after she finished she went to sit back down next to Clarisse and started crying when she wrapped her arm around her, pulling her closer as Joe watched.
Afterwards everyone gathered back at the Palace.
"Momma?" Lena said softly while standing beside her.
"Oh Lena," Clarisse answered while turning to her and put her hands up, cupping her face "I'm so proud of you for what you done today." She said and kissed her forehead before wrapping her arms around Lena's shoulders "Rose would be so proud of her little sister." She whispered.
"I hope so, I done it for her." Lena answered as tears escaped her eyes.
"She would be." Olivia answered while rubbing Lena's back and watched as they both looked at her "We are all proud of you." She said reaching over and brushed Lena's hair back behind her ear.
"And don't you forget that." Clarisse added.
"Nana?"
Looking down to see Emma stood beside them Clarisse bent over and scooped her up in her arms "Hello darling." She said and kissed her cheek "Did you have fun with Ally today?"
"Yeah." Emma said nodding and looked at her "I love you Nana." She whispered giving her a hug.
"I love you too." Clarisse whispered back and rested her chin on Emma's head when she noticed Cara walking out the room. "Olivia, can you take Emma for me?" She asked while looking at her.
"Of course." Olivia nodded and extended her arms out to her.
"No I want to stay with my Nana." Emma exclaimed.
"Sweetheart, look at me." Clarisse whispered and watched as she looked up at her while leaving her arms around her neck "I need to go and talk to Auntie Cara, to make sure she's okay. I will be back soon and then you can stay with me, okay?" She said softly.
"Okay." She said moving her head closer and gave her an eskimo kiss.
"Thank you sweetheart." Clarisse answered and passed her to Olivia "I love you so so much." She whispered while running her hand down the back of her head "Be back soon."
"Take your time." Olivia answered and watched her walk away and out the room.
Finding Cara sat out on the swings she slowly walked over to her.
"I thought you might like some company?" Clarisse said as she stood beside her and watched Cara as she looked up.
"Thanks." Cara said and looked back out into the gardens.
"I am here you know, if you need someone to talk to?" Clarisse asked while moving and sat down on the swing next to Cara.
"I know." Cara nodded while looking down, pushing herself slightly on the swing.
Clarisse sat watching her for several moments before reaching her arm across for her hand, giving Cara's hand a squeeze as she took hold of Clarisse's.
"I hope she's with Erica and Philippe." Cara said sadly "And our Grandparents too of course."
"Oh she will be." Clarisse answered while looking across at her.
"Momma?" Cara said as she raised her head and looked over at her.
"Yes sweetheart." Clarisse answered.
"I'm going to go away for a while." Cara said.
"Oh... where are you going?" Clarisse asked.
"To see my friends in America..." She said and looked out into the gardens "I don't know how long I will be gone for, but I just need to get away from here for a while." She said taking a deep breath and looked down "I keep seeing her laying in the road, covered in blood hardly breathing." She whispered and closed her eyes "I know I'm going to see that for a very long time, but here, here it's where it happened." She said looking across at Clarisse "I just need to get away for a while, you understand, don't you?" She asked.
"I do." Clarisse answered while letting go of her hand and stood up "I understand." She whispered while standing beside her, wrapping her arms around her as they both began to cry "You've been through a lot, if you need us we will be here and will be just a phone call away."
"I know, thank you." Cara cried.
After a few moments Clarisse moved to sit back down, but held onto Cara's hand again.
"Will you look after Rose's horse while I'm away?" Cara asked and looked at Clarisse as she gasped.
"With everything that has happened, I completely forgot about her horse." She said softly while putting her other hand up to her forehead "Is she still over at the house?" She asked while looking at Cara.
"Yeah. I saw her today, shes looking for Rose and I guess she will be doing that for a while." Cara said sadly.
"She will." Clarisse answered "I will have the stable guys go and get her today and bring her here." She said giving Cara's hand a squeeze.
"Thank you." Cara whispered.
"Here you both are." Joe said as he came up behind them "Are you okay?" He asked as they both looked back at him.
"Yes, just talking about Rose's horse." Clarisse said while standing up and turned to him "I'm going to have the stable guys go and get her today and bring her back here."
"Okay." Joe said nodding and watched as Cara slowly stood up "How are you holding up sweetheart?" He asked while stepping closer.
"As well as can be." Cara said raising her head "Actually Daddy, can we go for a walk? I need to talk to you about something."
"Of course we can." Joe nodded and looked at Clarisse who nodded slightly.
"Thank you." Cara answered as they began walking away.
Clarisse stood watching them for a moment before going back inside, leaving them to be alone.
After everyone but family had left, Clarisse went up to get changed into something warmer and more comfortable. Coming back down a short time later just as Joe came back in.
"Hey, there's a guy out here that wants to see you." He said as she stopped and looked across at him "Apparently you talked to him on the phone a couple days ago and arranged it."
"Oh yes, right." Clarisse said nodding and walked across to him "While I go out to talk to him can you please gather the family for me?" She asked.
"What's going on?" He asked and watched her as she grabbed her coat "Clarisse?" He asked and watched her slip it on.
"Please can you just do as I ask? And meet me outside?" She asked while walking over to the door, turning back to him as he stood with his hands on his hips "Please?" She asked.
"Okay." He said nodding and watched her walk out.
Several moments later, he and the family all headed outside to see Clarisse stood beside the man.
"Mom, what's going on?" Pierre asked as they walked across to them.
Turning to the family "This is Peter who helped me arrange this. He brought some of his doves here for us to let go for Rose. I thought it would be a beautiful way of expressing a final goodbye."
"Oh that is a wonderful idea." Olivia nodded and gave her Mom a small smile.
"I think Rose would love this." Pierre added while standing beside her, putting his arm around her shoulders.
"I thought so too." Clarisse answered as he kissed the side of her head "Now some of us can hold them to let them go and others Peter will let go from the basket."
"Who wants to hold one?" Peter asked.
"Can I hold one?" Emma asked as she let go of Olivia's hand.
"Of course you can darling." Clarisse answered as Pierre took one from Peter "We can hold him together?" She said while crouching down beside her and put her arms around Emma "Hold your hands out like this?" She said showing her what she was doing with her hands. Smiling as she put her hands out, palms facing upwards "That's it." She said kissing the side of her head and slipped her hands under hers.
"Are you ready?" Pierre asked as he bent over in front of them.
"Yes." Emma said nodding and watched him put the dove in their hands, clasping them gently around the dove.
"Doesn't her feathers feel beautiful?" Pierre asked and watched as Emma nodded.
"Okay. On the count of three." Peter said while looking around everyone "Throw them up into the air and watch them as they circle overhead."
After the countdown they threw the doves up into the air and watched as they all flew up into the sky.
"Bye bye birdy." Emma said while smiling up at them.
"Yes, bye bye birdy." Clarisse added and wrapped her arms around Emma's waist as she kissed her cheek.
"That was beautiful." Olivia said as she wiped away a couple stray tears.
"Rose will be smiling now." Cara added as Pierre put his arm around her shoulders "Thank you so much Momma." She said and watched her stand up, taking Emma with her.
"You're welcome darling." Clarisse answered as Emma rested her head on Clarisse's shoulder.
After thanking Peter he left, and as the kids and grand kids all headed back inside Joe watched as Clarisse put Emma down.
"Clarisse?" He called out as Emma ran inside with Lena and Olivia.
Stopping Clarisse turned to see Joe stood looking at her "What's wrong?" She asked while walking over to him.
"Can we go for a walk?" He asked.
"Of course we can." Clarisse answered as he took her hand in his, locking his fingers with hers.
"That was a beautiful idea, thank you." He said looking back at her.
"Its okay." Clarisse said looking up at him as she put her free hand on his arm.
Cara stood by the stairs leading up to the Palace and watched as they walked slowly away from the Palace. Looking down for a moment before going inside to find Olivia, when she found her they left the Palace and over to the house so she could pack some stuff for her trip. Once they were finished they headed back to the Palace, then Olivia and her family headed home.
Later that evening as Joe wanted to be alone for a bit, Clarisse sat up on the bed with Lena snuggled up to her.
"Momma, how come Cara and Rose's Mom wasn't there today?" She asked while dipping her head back and looked up at her.
"Oh I don't know actually." Clarisse said looking down at her.
"She wasn't there because I asked her not to come." Cara said as she came into the bedroom carrying Emma "This little one I am guessing tried to get into your suite, but couldn't as the doors being sticky again. Poor thing came to my room crying and asking for you." She said as she stood beside the bed.
"Oh Emma I'm sorry." Clarisse said sitting up and took her from Cara "I'm sorry sweetheart." She said and kissed the top of Emma's head as she snuggled up to her.
"Why did you ask your Mom not to come?" Lena asked and watched Cara as she walked around and sat beside her.
"Because she doesn't care." Cara answered as Lena snuggled up to her "It was a test, I have known for years that she didn't care, I just wanted to see if she would come or stay away."
"But how do you know she wasn't sat at the back?" Clarisse asked while looking across at her "She might off been."
"She wasn't. I was sent a photo about a month ago of what she looked like now." Cara said looking at her "The guards were on look out and none of them see her, even the ones who were at the church on security watch before the service said that they didn't see her." Cara answered while looking at the tv "She doesn't care, never has and never will."
"Oh I'm sorry sweetheart." Clarisse said while reaching over and rubbed her arm.
"It's okay, I accepted that fact years ago. You are my Mom, always have and always will." Cara said looking over at her "You've cared from day one, was always there for us and you always will be." She said giving her a small smile "Love you Momma."
"Love you too darling." Clarisse answered.
A couple hours later Joe returned to the suite to find Cara sleeping on one side of the bed, Lena fast asleep beside her, Clarisse sleeping on the edge of the other side of the bed with Emma between her and Lena. He had to chuckle when he saw Emma holding onto Clarisse's hand as they all lay sleeping.
Deciding to leave them to sleep peacefully he headed back out into the suite, closing the door behind him and unaware that Clarisse wasn't sleeping properly. Hearing the door closing she lifted her head, staring over at the door for several seconds before looking across at Cara.
"Cara." She whispered "Cara..."
"MMmm." Cara answered, slowly opening her eyes and looked at Clarisse "What's wrong?" She asked.
"Can you come and lay here, so Emma doesn't fall out of the bed?" She asked.
"Of course." Cara answered sleepily while climbing from the bed and walked around to her "Where are you going?" She asked as Clarisse climbed from the bed.
"To see your Father." She answered and watched Cara climb into the bed.
"Okay." She answered and closed her eyes.
Covering them over with the blankets she crept over to the door, walking out as Joe lifted his head and watched as she closed the door behind her.
"Did I wake you?" He asked as she walked over to him.
"No you didn't, I was sort of awake." She said standing beside the couch, where he laid.
"Want to lay with me?" He asked while lifting the blanket up and watched as she climbed over, to lay between him and the back of the couch "You know, you all looked peaceful just now." He whispered as Clarisse rested her head on his chest and extended her arm around his waist.
"Not as peaceful as it would be with you." Clarisse answered and felt him kissing the top of her head "We are going to be okay, aren't we?" She asked and lifted her head to look up at him.
"Of course we are." He answered and kissed her "I love you."
"I love you too." Clarisse answered and watched him rest his head back down while closing his eyes. With a sigh she rested her head back on his chest and just stared out into the darkness of the room.