I am so sorry to all of my loyal followers. I just got a new job a few weeks ago and have been doing summer work, so have been unable to update. Also, the ending of the last chapter left me reeling and I couldn't really find a way to continue. But I've just re-read it again and my inspiration has been found! So without further ado, here is the chapter you have all been anticipating (well, at least I have been anticipating it, lol)

Pony POV

Ally's protests still echoed in my head and now I realized that not only was she scared, but I was hurting her just as much or maybe even more than that belt had.

Fragile, porcelain hands clutched her face as she turned to go.I heard scuffling from behind me and turned to see that everyone had found this moment to be optimal for leaving the roof.

"What's going on?" Darry's brows crinkled in a mix of confusion, anger, and worry as his eyes shifted between Ally's retreating back and me.

"Nothin'," I huffed meanly and felt a hand clamp like a vice on my shoulder.

"Don't you nothin' me. You're still my kid brother, even if you're a braver man than I. Now tell me-" Darry stopped in his tracks lookin' like he'd seen a ghost.

"Braver man, huh?" Dally smirked and chuckled at Darry, hitchin' his thumb into one of the belt loops in his jeans.

"Aww, ole Dal. Don't pretend like this whole thing comes as a shock. We all know that Darry's berries are itching for a certain little sister. Its the same with all of you dirty fucks." Two-Bit spoke more candidly than I had ever heard him speak before and the whole room seemed to become both more and less tense than it had been.

Darry cleared his throat and opened his mouth, "So, did you try to kiss her again?"

I shook my head in a show of attitude. "Yeah, kind of."

"Well, I don't mean to bust your bottle, but she is your sister and its pretty damn fucked up to want to screw a 15 year old." Steve rolled his eyes at me.

"Leave him be Steve, you fucking kissed her too and felt her up." My eyes widened at Soda's display of anger toward Steve. All the time that they had been best friends I had never heard Soda take up stock against him.

"Well, at least I can fuck her without making it feel like a sin."

"Just shut up and stop fighting already!" Everyone who had been about to yell or throw a punch stopped because Johnny stood in the center of us, looking just as resilient and resigned as I'd ever seen anyone look.

"God, all we have is each other down here. We gotta stop fighting. And I also think you need to consider how Ally is feeling about all of this. You saw those slashes, you heard how she got beat. Goddamn it, we can talk to each other, but who does she have?"

My heart cried out for Ally more than ever before, I could physically feel a hole in my chest as I thought of the way I had upset her. I realized now that all she had been trying to do was to refuse and refute feelings that I didn't have the strength or will to refute. But then, I had to go and pressure her, tell her I hurt without her and how much I just wanted to hold her; I had been so selfish.

Without another word from Johnny, Soda was already up the stairs to where Ally was. I wished that I was a braver man.

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I had jammed my face as far into the bed, bedding, pillows, and sheets as possible, but it wasn't enough. It would never be enough as I wept loud enough for every cell in my body to tense and wriggle inside of me.

"Ally-bug?" I felt a hand soft but urgent on my back.

"Soda, no. Please leave me alone." I hiccuped throughout my attempts to stop leaking like a faucet.

"Ally, I'm here just like I used to be. I'm your brother and you can talk to me. I'm sorry about everything; so is Pony and everyone else.

"No, Soda. You don't understand." My hand clenched in anger synonymously with my insides. "I sinned and the Grandmother and God punished me for it. Now I'm good.. I don't want to go back to being bad again."

"Ally-bug, listen to me, the Grandmother and God didn't punish you for kissing Ponyboy or anyone else"...

I thought of Soda in the attic and Pony in the bathroom. I thought of the way it had felt to kiss all three of them and the way the hardness of Soda's erection had felt through his jeans. My hands flew up to my eyes in horror, there was no way to block any of my internal thoughts from reaching my own self.

"God, Ally, I will do anything to make this normal for you again."

"Soda, it can't be normal ever again. I didn't just kiss Ponyboy or you."

"What are you talking about Al-Bug?" Soda had a look of concern in his eyes as a final flare of red hot anger and frustration erupted from my mouth.

"I have fantasies okay! It can never be normal again because I'm so attracted to my own brothers that it hurts. I'm always burning up inside because of it! Stop acting like you're still my brother, the brother who calls me Al-Bug and doesn't want to kiss me.. "

Soda was silent for a long time and I found that I was dreading and hoping that he would try to kiss me again.

"It doesn't have to be the way it used to be then... it can be different."

"Different.." I whispered, my lips trembling. I knew what he meant and all the fantasies that I had had in the past few weeks flashed by in my mind and my body was on fire worse than ever before. I could almost hear it sizzle, could almost see the smoke rising.

"If you want it to, it can."

My chest rose and fell quickly as my breaths came more quickly and I gulped, staring deeply into my brother's chocolate brown eyes.

No. Staring deeply into Soda's brown eyes.

Slowly but urgently I reached for his hand, pulling it towards me. I didn't really know what to do with it once I held it in mine, didn't know which part of me to lay it on or anything about seduction or of being with a man. But Soda must have seen something in my eyes and he definitely knew what to do. Softly and urgently at the same time he laid his hand over one of my breasts and leaned into me capturing first my bottom lip and then my top lip in a searing kiss that had the fire spreading through all of my body and in between all of my cells.

"Soda," I sighed as he laid me back on the bed carefully to avoid any agitation of my cuts. His tongue met mine as both of his hands roamed my body. They moved from my elbows to my hips and then underneath my shirt where he lay them on my stomach, stroking it. Moving his hands to my hips again I felt him hard against my thigh.

"Open your legs." Soda groaned into my ear, licking it.

My mouth was dry as I looked into Soda's eyes which were filled with lust. My legs opened for him, seemingly of their own accord and I felt his body between them. His lips met mine again and then left, moving down to my chin and then to my neck where he bit and nibbled and sucked. I couldn't keep my mouth from falling open as he pushed the hardness in his jeans into me and moved down to give special attention to my collar bone.

"Oh my god," fell out of my open mouth as he moved his hands to knead my breasts. My thoughts had been right; it did feel better to have Soda's urgent, calloused hands on them than it did my calculated prodding ones.

"Jesus Ally," Soda moaned as he rocked into me.

I felt something happen then. Well, it had already been happening but now it was happening even more so.

A wetness concentrated between my legs. I thought of its implications, let my mind finally wander back to that day I'd seen Soda's.. dick. I conjured it up in my mind along with a monster which would no doubt pop out of it. "Hello Ally, it would say, "it won't hurt-for long." And then the monster opened its mouth which was filled with sharp fangs and laughed.

"Soda, stop."

His hands fell away from my breasts.

"What's wrong Al?"

"I just- I can't anymore. I-I'm scared."

"Ok... god dammit." Soda rolled over till he was sitting beside me.

"I'm sorry." Closing my eyes for a moment and then reopening them again I looked towards my brother.

"I'm just not ready... for that yet." My eyes shifted from him to stare at the bed. My fingers played with a bed sheet, rolling and unrolling it.

"I'm sorry..." Soda looked at me. "Hey,"grabbing my chin in his hand he turned my face towards him smiling.

"I really am. I just got carried away, forgot how young you really are."

"I'm not that young.." I crossed my arms feeling more like a younger, bratty sister again.

Laughing, he shook his head. Getting up off of the bed, Soda offered me his hand.

"Well, I'm just really old then."