Prompt: The First Doctor - "To lose is to win, and he who wins shall lose." - 'Doctor Who'

"I was still out on the field," I said in my defense as I felt all the eyes of my peers on me. Truth was, I had been stalling leaving the field in order to avoid being part of what the other guys had planned. Even now though, the guilt that I had started to feel as I entered the locker room to find Karofsky and Sam trying to explain to Coach Beiste why they were fighting without really telling her why, still weighed heavy.

"The point is, it shouldn't have gone down without you, Finn. You should've been leading the charge," Mercedes accused med.

I knew she had a point. I was supposedly the leader of both Glee and the football team. I had wanted that distinction. It was how I wanted people to think of me, yet right now I knew my fellow choir members felt that I had failed in that. They didn't think of me as a leader, they thought of me as a coward.

Like Sam and Rachel had pointed out, Kurt would soon be my stepbrother. I could fight and deny the fact all I want and it wasn't going to change. However, that wasn't the only reason I should be on Kurt's side through all of this. I should be supporting him because he was a friend and a member of New Directions. This group was just as important as any team, and deep down I knew my loyalty to these guys should be deeper than to those just on the football team because of what they have supported me through. Well, now it was Kurt who needed that support and I wasn't reciprocating, which I knew was the source of my guilt.

"Lay off Finn, everybody. It's not his problem. It's not any or yours problem really but thank-you for what you've done. Especially Sam," Kurt spoke up quietly from where he was sitting, and somehow his defense was more condemning than the others accusations.

I may have succeeded in avoiding the confrontation with Karofsky this afternoon but that victory wasn't satisfying. I hadn't felt like this since Burt had kicked me out of his house. I had looked out for my own interest and failed those who had accepted me just as I was. Failed the one person who had showed me support time and again despite everything that I had done to him.

Perhaps I had won on one account but I had lost on a more important one.

* Dialogue from "Furt"