Hi everybody, I hope you're all enjoying this so far.

XXX

Chapter 4

Failure.

"Quiet." Raph mumbled into his pillow.

You're useless.

"Please, leave me alone." he felt a tear roll down his cheek as the voices in his head continued.

You failed them.

"Please... stop." he cried quietly. He couldn't be any louder or he would alert his brothers. They weren't aware of the voices in his head.

You deserve to die.

His tears seemed to instantly dry up when he heard that "... I know." he definitely couldn't deny that. He wouldn't deny it. He wants nothing more than to leave this world, leave the place where he lost the love of his life, Olivia and his twin boys, Aiden and Jonah.

Raph's dull amber eyes moved up to one of the framed photos of them at one of their family get-togethers. Olivia was perfect for him. She had soft, tanned skin and these piercing green eyes that sometimes even scared Raph. Her thick black hair surrounded her oval shaped face. She was a tough girl, had a spunky attitude and never backed down from him when others would. It was definitely a trait that could get annoying, but it also attracted him to her. His sons, his innocent, little boys were only six years old when they were taken away. He reached up and traced a finger over the photo. "I'm sorry." he mumbled. None of this would've happened if he only had expected the unexpected. He had gotten too comfortable with his life, let his guard down and that led to his downfall.

Raph had just pulled up in front of his home after a long day. It was getting late and the streets and sidewalks were empty. He stepped out of the car and moved to open the back door, just as his cell phone buzzed in his pocket. He didn't answer, he would call whoever it was back when he got inside.

"Come on, you two." he said. Two tanned skinned boys hopped out the backseat and ran to the front door. They were identical twins, both with short, chestnut brown hair neatly combed back by their mother before their day started. They had bright, amber eyes that seemed to sparkle with joy. The only way you could tell the difference between them was by the heart shaped birthmark on Jonah's upper bicep. Raph followed them up to the front door. He stuck the key in the lock and turned it, letting the little balls of energy inside.

"Dad, look at this." Aiden happily pulled a new item out of his backpack to show to his father. It was one of those clips that kids hook onto their backpacks. His was round and had a detailed green dragon etched into it. "A lady made it for me at school today. Isn't it cool?"

"Yes, it's very cool. Do you want to put it on your book bag?" he offered.

Aiden took another quick glance at it and said "No, not yet."

Raph shrugged then chuckled. "Okay then."

"Dad, can we stay up later, today?" Jonah asked innocently.

"No, you've got school in the morning."

"Please." they both begged, giving Raph their best puppy dog eyes.

Raph groaned, he was not resistant to that look. "Fine, but only an hour and don't tell your mother."

The twin boys excitedly ran to the TV and turned it on. Raph smiled and shook his head. His phone rang again and this time he answered it. "Yo."

"Raph!" it was Leo and he sounded panicked. "I was trying to get a hold of you."

"Leo? What's up?" he asked now feeling slightly panicked as well.

"Where are you?" Leo ignored his brother's question and instead asked another question.

"The boys and I just got home." Raph answered. "What's going on, Leo?"

"It's the Foot, they're..." that was the only thing Raph heard before a loud crash made him turn his attention to the window and front door. The twins screamed in terror and ran to hide as the strangers broke into their home. The Foot had busted their way in and before Raph could react they attacked. Raph didn't have his weapons, he was outnumbered and outmatched. Nothing could stop this beat down. All he could do was try to fight and listen to his sons cry as they were forced to watch their father get overwhelmed. One of them struck Raph on the head with a blunt object. His world turned black as he lost consciousness.

He woke to panic-stricken voices and someone shaking his shoulder. "Raph, wake up?" it sounded like Leo.

"Babe, open your eyes." a tear-filled voice begged. That sounded like Olivia. "Please."

He finally opened them to see the faces of his brothers, who were all holding their weapons, and his wife. "Dude, are you okay?" Mikey asked worried. He sat up and rubbed his head. There was a nasty lump back there and some bruises on his body, but other than that he felt okay.

"Yeah, I think so." he groaned. Just then Olivia wrapped her arms around his neck in a tight hug and sobbed. Raph hugged her back. "What's going on?" everything that happened seemed to be a blur.

"The Foot, they caught us while our guard was down." Don explained. "We had to go into hiding underground in the lair, and we had to find you."

Realization dawned on him as the previous events came back to him. He became visibly shaken when he noticed two people were missing. "Where's Aiden and Jonah?" he heard Olivia's sobs get louder and looked back up to his brothers "Guys?"

It took a while before someone finally spoke up. "I'm sorry, Raph. They're not here." Leo said sadly. "And we've looked all over the house. We think the Foot took them."

Raph's breathing became shorter and more ragged when he heard that. He stood up as quickly as he could. "What?" he shook his head and ran upstairs.

"Raph...?" Leo started up the stairs after him. He found Raph in his bedroom searching around in his closet.

"Raph, we've already looked in there." Leo sighed.

"I know, I believe you." Raph finally found what he was looking for, a metal box. "That's why I'm going to go look for them." he opened it and pulled out his twin sai. "Get Olivia to the lair." he started to walk by his older brother, only to be stopped by a hand on his shoulder.

"You can't go by yourself."

"Help if you want, I don't care, but right now I'm trusting you to get my wife to safety while I start looking." Raph headed back downstairs, where everyone else was still waiting.

"Raph, hold on. We'll all go together."

"I don't have time for that." he nearly yelled. "They were my responsibility, I was supposed to watch them, I was supposed to protect them and because I couldn't do that, they've been taken. I can't wait." he looked to Olivia and saw the tears that were still streaming down her face. He turned away from her and tightened his grip on his sais. That look she was giving him, he didn't like it. "Go with them, Liv." He quickly ran out before anyone could stop him.

Months went by with no signs of where they might be. He saw plenty of ninja and when he found them he was anything, but gentle with questioning. Some even met the unfortunate end of his sai. He was ruthless in his search for his sons. He looked everywhere, even taking a chance searching through Saki's tower alone, turned out to be a bust. The clues that he did manage to get would usually lead to a dead end. They were toying with him. His brothers would help him, but whenever they would call it a night, Raph would continue looking. Searching until dawn when the city started bustling with life. He would stay out longer and search harder. He practically ran himself ragged.

When he did get back to the lair. He would see his brother's children, they would ask him where Aiden and Jonah were and that would only frustrate him more since he couldn't give them a real answer besides "I don't know." Little Jayden and Warren were the most persistent out of all of them considering they were the closest to the twins. The worst part of it all for Raph was having to face Olivia when he got back from searching. Raph had convinced himself that she was blaming him for what happened so he couldn't look at her.

About a month later, the worse thing happened. One night after listening to Olivia cry herself to sleep again. He made the decision to continue his search on his own. He made sure she was asleep, got up out of bed, got dressed, grabbed his weapons and headed out. When he got topside it was raining cats and dogs, but that wasn't going to stop him. Within seconds, his clothes were soaked through and his brown hair stuck to the sides of his face. He started his search by looking in every alleyway for any signs of the black clad ninjas. Little did he know, he was being followed.

"Raph?" a voice called.

He turned to see Olivia standing there staring at him. She was soaked and out of breath from trying to keep up with him, she didn't even bother to change out of her pajamas. "Liv, what are you doing out here?" he asked immediately turning away from her.

"I'm here to tell you to come back to the lair. You've searched enough for tonight." she walked up to him and wrapped her arms around him.

"No," he gently pushed her away. "I can't rest until I find them."

"But you're no good to them if you're exhausted. You need to rest."

"Every second I waste, they could be getting further away or they could be getting hurt. I can't waste time." he turned away from her. "And I can't stand seeing you cry anymore. Go back to the lair, where it's safe." he started to walk away.

"I don't blame you." she said suddenly causing him to freeze in place. "I really don't."

"Well... at least one of us doesn't. Just go back, I'll be there soon."

She slowly approached him. "Please Raph, just..." she was cut off when a ninja landed right in front of her. She gasped getting Raph's attention. He turned just in time to see the Foot ninja run her through with his sword.

He felt numb in that moment, he felt his blood run cold and everything seemed to move in slow motion. He watched as the ninja withdrew the sword from her body, watched her crumple to the floor and he let out an enraged yell as he sprinted toward the lone ninja. The Foot soldier turned and caught a fist to the face. Once he was on the floor, Raph stood over him and plunged the sai deep into his chest. He repeated the same action again and again his anguished yells getting louder as he punctured more holes into the now dead body. Blood was everywhere.

When he finally stopped he made his way over to Olivia. He cradled her in his arms as she coughed up blood and gasped for air. "Liv," he spoke gently to her. "Just hold on, I'm gonna get you some help." He took his phone out and quickly dialed Leo's number.

"Raph?" Leo answered sleepily.

"Leo, I need you to get down here." he knew he was crying, but there was no telling the difference between his tears and the rain running down his face.

"What?" Leo wasn't fully awake yet.

"Please, Olivia is hurt and she needs help. Please hurry." he begged.

He seemed to wake up when he heard that. "Yeah, I'll be right there." Raph quickly told him where he was then hung up. He looked back down at his suffering wife. He did all he could to try and keep her alive, but when he looked in her pain filled eyes and as he was forced to watch her cough up more of that much needed blood, he knew he was only delaying the inevitable.

His brothers never made it in time. They found them in an alley. Raph was cradling Olivia's lifeless corpse close, hiding his crying face in the crook of her neck. He was holding her hand tightly as if it would somehow bring her back. Begging, pleading for her to come back and that he needed her.

At the funeral, he showed the first signs of breaking down. He spent hours knelt down near her grave, just staring at the tombstone. Eventually his brothers had to step in to provide some sort of comfort to their distraught kin. They all knelt down near him. They didn't say anything, which was great because Raph really didn't want to hear what they had to say.

Raph must have stayed there for at least an hour before he finally spoke. "I have to find them." he muttered wiping away the remainder of his tears.

"We know Raph, and we will." Mikey reassured.

A few more months passed as their search continued. Raph was becoming more desperate by the day. He had to find them, he had to believe that they were okay. It was the only shred of hope he had to hold onto. The Foot appearances seemed to be dwindling after a while and Raph was starting to get worried.

They did manage to find a small group of ninjas on a rooftop, there were about five of them all gathered around. One of them was holding onto a fairly large bag. The brothers decided to keep out of their direct line of sight.

"What do you think they're talking about?" Don asked.

"Who cares?" Raph muttered "I'm going over there."

"Wait, Raph" Leo grabbed onto his shoulder. "If we follow them then they might lead us to the rest and to your sons."

Raph hesitantly hung back with his brothers and waited for them to start moving. After a few minutes the Foot soldiers took off along the rooftops. "They're moving." Raph took off after them. He could tell that his brothers were right behind him. After running a couple blocks, they noticed that they were heading in a direction that was pretty familiar.

"Guys, where the hell are they going?" Mikey asked.

"No idea, but I've got a bad feeling." Leo said.

When Raph heard that, he moved even faster still managing to keep up with them. Eventually they came to a stop on the roof of... "My place?" Raph questioned completely confused by the whole thing.

"Why would they stop here?"

"Maybe they want to try and finish me off." Raph said as he glared daggers toward them.

The one holding the large bag, placed it on the rooftop. "It looks like this is where they are making their actual stop." Don said.

"Then let's go." Raph sprinted towards them with his brothers right behind him. The brothers made quick work of them. One was kicked off the roof and two managed to get away.

"They seemed to be in a real hurry to get out of here." Mikey noticed.

"Doesn't matter, we still have a couple of them here. Check the bag." Raph stormed over to one of the ninjas who wasn't completely unconscious and grabbed him by the collar of his uniform. He could hear his brothers fussing with the bag."Why did you come here?" he questioned.

The barely conscious ninja only pointed to the towards the bag before passing out. He dropped the body with a growl and turned toward his brothers, but something seemed off. Mikey had turned away from them and was covering his face with his hands. Leo was already trying to seal the bag back up. Don had stood up and stopped in front of Raph to prevent him from coming any closer. "Raph, hold on, I don't think you need to see that."

Raph tried shoving his younger brother aside, but he stood firmly in place. "Outta the way, Don."

"I'm serious, Raphael." he placed both hands on his shoulders.

Raph ignored his little brother. "Leo, what's in the bag?"

The only response he received from him didn't come from his mouth, but from his body language. Leo was facing away from him and his shoulders noticeably tensed. He looked over to Mikey and he could see that he was visibly shaken by what he saw. He looked Don in the eye and noticed that his hazel eyes were brimming with un-shed tears as he continued to hold him back. "What is in the bag?" he growled as fear and worry started to set in.

Leo's shoulders slumped. "Let him go, Don." he ordered.

"But Leo..." Don started to argue.

"Just" Leo interrupted then let out a sad sigh. "let him go."

Don hesitantly stood aside. He really didn't want him to see the contents of that bag. Raph marched up toward Leo, getting more worried as he got closer. When he finally got there and saw what was inside, his stomach turned, he felt like he was going to be sick. He felt like he could no longer stand as he fell to his knees because inside were two burned bodies. They were small children and their bodies were charred beyond recognition. Lying on top of the bodies was a clip, with a green dragon drawn on it. He picked it up and examined it. Some of the plastic was melted off, but he could tell it was the same one that belonged to...

"Aiden." he whispered. That did it, Raph's breathing became very shallow. "No... no, not them." he mumbled. "Please, no."

Leo placed a hand on his shoulder. "Raph, I'm so sorry." his voice cracked as he tried to comfort him, but how do you comfort someone in this state? What do you say after everything that has happened?

Raph wasn't really hearing anything anyway aside from his own breathing. "Please... I can't...not them." he turned to Leo. "Why? Why is this happening?" he asked as he finally let his tears fall.

"I-I don't know, Raph, but..." he heard one of the Foot ninjas begin to stir.

Raph's eyes snapped up to look at him and before anyone could stop him, he pounced on him and wrapped his hands tightly around the ninja's throat. "You bastards, you took my wife, you took my kids. I will fucking kill all of you." he squeezed tighter.

"Raph, no." Don attempted to pull him off the struggling ninja. "Don't do this."

"I don't care. I already have their blood on my hands, I can add more." he starting to sound more unhinged the more he spoke. It took the efforts of all three of his brothers to finally get him off. They had to drag him away from the unconscious body "No, let go." he screamed as he tried to fight out of his brothers' grip, but to no avail. Just then, he let out a yell. A mournful yell for his family, one that broke his brothers' hearts when they heard it. Eventually he slumped against his eldest brother and sobbed. Leo just embraced him, that was all he could do. He looked to Don and Mikey and they looked pretty lost on what to do because the only shred of hope Raph had left was now gone.

Raph withdrew his arm back under the blanket and wrapped his arms around his stomach as the memories flooded his mind. He was vaguely aware of the door opening behind him. Whoever it was he just wanted them to go away.

"Um... Uncle Raph?" he sounded young. One of his nephews, most likely. He's never been able to resist the presence of one of the kids. "You awake?" he asked, unsure.

Raph sighed. "...Yes."

The sudden excited footfalls led him to guess that it was Mikey's son. Sure enough, a couple seconds later, Luke's smiling face popped up in front of him. Once he saw his uncle's face, his smile turned upside down. "I... um..." Luke was holding onto a piece of paper.

"What is it?" Raph deadpanned.

"Uh..." Raph noticed Luke was not so subtly staring over his shoulder toward the door. His father must be standing in the doorway. "Here." the child said suddenly, holding the sheet out to him.

Raph gently took it away from him and stared at it.

"I drew it... at school." Luke explained. "It's you and..." he suddenly looked embarrassed when Raph didn't say anything. "I'm sorry, if you don't like it. I'll... I'll go." he turned to run away, but Raph caught his wrist.

Forcing himself to sit up, he pulled his young nephew into a hug, wrapping his withering arms around him. "Thank you." Raph whispered, shaking slightly as a sob escaped him. "Thank you."

"You're welcome." Luke said, nervously wrapping his small arms around him. They pulled apart and Luke went to leave the room... very hesitantly. Once he was gone, he laid back down and held the drawing close to his body.

XXX

Well, that was a long one, but now you know the full story and The Foot is involved.

Hope you enjoy.

Let me know how I'm doing.