A/N: I apologize for the delay in getting this out. I began working on another fic and it took awhile to make my way back to this one. I'll admit there isn't as much Carson/Elsie interaction in here, but they are present and have their own interactions with John and Anna. There is a scene towards the end, between John and Anna that borders on M-rating for those of you that aren't into that you can feel free to move along. Anyways, I want to thank you all for the amazing reviews on this story and hope you all continue to do so. Thanks to A-Lady-To-Me and Terriejane for helping me out with this chapter. Enjoy!
Ch.15
"Aidan, darling, please come finish picking up your toys. John will be home from work any minute and then we can go out trick-or-treating," Anna called out to her son. She smiled to herself as she played back her words in her head. John wasn't officially living with her, but it had become habit for him to come by her place after work to keep things consistent for Aidan. His flat wasn't exactly kid friendly and it provided him the opportunity to stay the night with her if she needed him to. Their sexual relations were still non-existent which was proving to be more of a challenge for the both of them, but John was adamant they wouldn't progress to that stage until she was certain she was ready to. It was somewhat infuriating, these conditions that he had set out, but on some level she supposed he was right. Since revealing her secret, the flashbacks and nightmares had become more prevalent than before.
"Mummy can we go get candy now?" Aidan asked as he burst into the kitchen with a smile.
She couldn't help falling more in love with her little boy all the more as she looked at him dressed in his costume. Aidan had worn it for his Halloween party at school and insisted on wearing it for the rest of the night. A few weeks ago John had introduced Aidan to the story of Peter Pan and Aidan was absolutely obsessed with it now and had long forgotten his fascination with soldiers. He stood before her dressed in his green, leaf-patterned tunic with a rope tie belt, dark green pants, a feathered pointed hat, and brown boots. Most importantly was his plastic sword that he carried everywhere with him since they had purchased the costume two weeks before.
"Did you do as I asked?" Anna replied as she dried the last dish and set it in the cabinet.
"Yeeesssss," he answered back slowly before disappearing back into the living room.
Anna had to smile to herself when she heard the shuffling of toys from the other room. She shook her head and laughed softly to herself, knowing full well he was probably so excited to go out that he was doing a shoddy job of picking up his toys. Anna knew Aidan wasn't perfect, he of course had his moments of defiance; but for the most part she couldn't complain. He would always be perfect in her eyes. She was just about to go check on him when she heard sound of the door opening followed by Aidan shouting for John.
Anna had known John would be coming by soon and had decided to leave the door unlocked and the alarm off. She had been taking baby steps to step outside of her comfort zone and John was sure to lock the door and set the alarm once he was inside. She overheard Aidan ask John, "Where's your costume?"
"It's right here," John answered as he shook the bag in his hand. "I can't wear my costume to work like you do to school," he explained to the boy as he set his briefcase down. He took his suit jacket off and laid it over the back of the couch before loosening his tie.
"Oh, that's okay, Mummy hasn't put her costume on yet either," Aidan said as he climbed up on the couch and continued to watch his movie.
"She hasn't?" John asked as he picked Aidan up for a moment and placed a kiss on his cheek as he tickled Aidan's sides.
"No!" Aidan squealed as he kicked his legs in an attempt to get free.
John set Aidan back down and asked, "Where is your Mummy?"
"She's cleaning up in the kitchen," Aidan replied.
"Well, I'll have to round up your Mummy and make sure she gets dressed so we can get going and start collecting some candy," John said. He ruffled the little boy's hair before walking into the kitchen to find Anna.
He swung the kitchen door open and found Anna standing on tip toe trying to put a piece of tupperware up on the top shelf of the kitchen cabinets. Her shirt crept up a little, revealing her waistline and John bit down on his lip in anticipation. "Now there's a view I could get used to," John said flirtatiously as he walked toward her.
"Well, if you hang out in the kitchen more I'm sure you will," she joked.
"I'm sorry, do I not cook enough for you?" John asked as he closed the gap and wrapped his arms around her waist.
She settled into his arms and kissed him languidly. "I was only teasing, but you know we can only eat spaghetti so many times," Anna said with a giggle.
"Not according to Aidan," he pointed out before kissing her back and nuzzling the side of her neck with his nose. He inhaled her perfume and loved the feel of her soft skin against his. John heard a soft moan escape her lips as his hot breath made contact with her skin and it drew a proud smile upon his face. It was taking everything in his power to restrain himself right now.
"Ah, yes. Well thanks to you he wants nothing to do with my 'b'sghetti' anymore," she said with an infectious smile.
"So when will I get to see you in your costume?" he asked, knowing full well what her costume was.
"I'm going to change in a moment," she said, "just finishing up in here."
"Let me finish the dishes, you go ahead and start getting dressed," John offered as he took the dish rag from her.
"Are you sure? I feel bad, you doing the dishes that you didn't even use," she said sweetly.
"It's fine. You've had me over almost every day this week and I haven't had a chance to help you clean really. Besides, my costume doesn't take long," he said. "I figure we'll pop over to Robert's house for some festivities, then back to your Dad's so he can trick-or-treat with them and…"
"And spend the night," she finished his sentence with a lazy smile. She shifted her body against him and felt a thrill travel through her. Her eyes were half lidded as she let out a heavy sigh. "Which will leave us all alone until tomorrow," she added.
"Right," he replied nervously, hoping the smile on his face had assured her that he was just as enlivened as she was. In truth, the prospect almost seemed daunting to John, he was exhilarated of course. What man wouldn't be jumping at the chance to spend a night alone with Anna? The problem was that he had become so accustomed to having Aidan around that he didn't really know how to act when it was just he and Anna, at least not for an extended period of time. And he certainly hadn't been intimate with a woman in a long time. If Anna decided that she was ready to move forward in their relationship tonight, John wasn't sure he was up to the task.
Anna freed herself from his arms and traipsed back to her bedroom to go change into her costume and John put the last of the dishes away. When he was done he headed into the bathroom to change into his costume and when he came out Aidan immediately pounced on him. "Put your hand's up Captain Hook!" Aidan demanded. John was decked out in red coat with gold trim, he wore a captain's hat but opted not to wear the wig, and he donned a set of brown boots matching Aidan's. John held up his hands in mock surrender, before saying, "Look at you little man. You look like the real Peter Pan jumping right off the pages of the book."
"I got a sword too!" Aidan said proudly.
"Now there's a man who has got his priorities straight," John joked with a bit of an eye roll. John whipped out his plastic sword, "On guard!" The two soon began to duel in the living room as they waited for Anna. John occasionally used one of the throw pillows as a shield and often resorted to "cheating" as Aidan referred to it in order to get the upper hand, to which John replied "I'm a pirate, there are no rules."
John stopped when he noticed Aidan lower his sword, "Mummy, you look so pretty!" The little boy ran off to embrace his mother and admire her costume.
When John turned around to face her he was taken aback by how gorgeous she looked in her Tinkerbell costume. It wasn't anything too risque or flashy, but she painted quite the picture with her hair pinned up and her pixie wings on. She didn't show off too much leg, but what she was showing was enough to make John's heart rate speed up three times over. Her make up made her eyes pop and she had put something in her hair that made it sparkle and shimmer like he had never seen before. He loved her all the more for wearing the costume Aidan had suggested. John made a mental note to get Aidan something special for bestowing such a gift upon him.
Anna hugged Aidan back and stood up to face John, "Well? How do I look?"
"I...um...there are no words. You're flawless," John sputtered out. His eyes were permanently fixed on her legs that seemed to go on for days. Anna filled out the costume so well, she may as well have been poured into it. She looked like some sort of woodland nymph come to life with all her delicate, tiny features. John pretended to admire her wings as he had her spin around but his eyes were travelling a little further south as he chanced a glance at her bum.
"Go grab your candy sack sweetheart," she instructed Aidan and began to grab their jackets.
"What's this for?" John asked.
"In case I get cold," Anna answered back.
"You wont be needing a jacket. If you get cold tonight it shall be me that is keeping you warm," he said in a rugged tone.
"I don't remember that part in the story," Anna teased as she helped Aidan with his jacket. "You'll have to tell me that version tonight when it's just the two of us," she purred.
Her words setting his teeth in edge, John thought his brain might combust at the naughty images that were playing out in his head right now. He gulped hard when she let her hand drift up his side as they walked out to the car. What had he gotten himself into?
They pulled up to the Crawley house and Aidan was awe struck. "Rob really went out of his way with the decorating this year! " John exclaimed.
"Mummy, is this a real haunted mansion?" Aidan asked cautiously as he squeezed John's hand a little tighter and inched in closer.
"No love. Mrs. Sybil's father lives here. Remember we told you about John's boss?" Anna explained.
Aidan nodded slowly but still looked unconvinced as he gazed at the house all lit up with lights and covered in cobwebs. There were fake headstones in the yard and some prop skeletons strung up by the door. An audio track of werewolves howling and crows cawing played in the background. Bats hung from the ceiling of the entryway and glow in the dark eyes peered out from the windows.
"I don't want to go in here Mummy," Aidan pleaded. "Please don't make me go." His voice was verging on breaking into cries.
"It's only for a little while my love," she said to Aidan. "Maybe I should take him back to the car and you can go inside," Anna whispered to John.
John met Aidan's eyes as he bent down to speak with him. "Hey kiddo, you can't be scared. You're Peter Pan. What kind of Captain Hook would I be if I didn't bring you along?" John asked. "I tell you what, we go in for just a few minutes and I'll hold you the whole time. And if you don't like it we can go. How does that sound?" John was sure he would be fine once they were inside. Sybil and Robert had practically ordered him to bring Aidan by as they would be having a bouncy house for the kids in the neighborhood and Robert was bringing out the ponies for the kids to ride.
"Ok," he responded as John picked him up in his arms.
"That's my boy," John said proudly as he readjusted Aidan's feather cap and motioned to ring the doorbell.
Anna smiled at the exchange between them and ran her hand up Aidan's back to reassure him.
The door swung open and it was Robert dressed up as Mark Antony, the Roman general and statesman. His costume consisted of a long tunic with an attached Burgundy cape, gladiator belt, gold studded arm cuffs and leather sandals. "There he is! We've been waiting for you," Robert greeted before turning his head back towards the kitchen. "Cora! John and Anna are here and they brought Aidan!" he shouted across the house. "I tell you ever since the girls got engaged she's got grandchild fever on the brain. She's been dying to see him," Robert reported in a low voice then refocused his attentions on the little boy in John's arms. "And this must be Aidan." Robert extended his hand and was met with some resistance on Aidan's part. Robert then produced a king size candy bar and wagged it back and forth in front of the boy.
Aidan eventually gave in and took the candy bar from Robert, "Thank you." Just as soon as Aidan had secured the treat in his hands he turned his face into John's shoulder.
"He certainly is a polite little fellow. Not very talkative though," Robert joked.
"He's just shy. The house decor gave him a bit of a scare," Anna explained, hoping Robert hadn't taken any offense.
"I'm sure once he sees some of the other kids here he'll be just as rambunctious as the rest of them," John said as he pat Aidan on the back. "Right partner?" Aidan shook his head back and forth in disagreement, but John and Anna just laughed. "He'll be fine," John mouthed to Robert.
"Oh, there he is. Let me see the little darling," Cora proclaimed as she walked into the foyer dressed as Cleopatra. Even Anna had to admit she looked rather striking in her costume that showed off more leg than her own costume. With a slit up the side of her gown and jewels that went on for days. And her eyeliner made her blue eyes more striking than usual. Sometimes Anna even had a hard time believing she was the mother of three grown girls. Cora poked her head over John's shoulder and gave a tiny wave of her hands as she asked, "Hello, Aidan, do you remember me?"
The little boy looked up for a moment and spoke softly as he replied, "No m'am."
"Uh, he is too precious, Anna," Cora cooed. "Well don't you worry darling, you will after tonight. You can call me Aunt Cora. And if there is anything you need, you feel free to come ask me. Ok?" she said with a genuine smile.
"Alright," he replied with his arms still wrapped securely around John.
"Anna, you look lovely by the way and I must say John you make quite a dashing Captain Hook," she complimented.
"Thank you your highness," John said with a chuckle.
"Well, let's not stand around, if you all will come into the house I can round you up some food and drinks. Some of the neighborhood kids are already out back playing carnival games and jumping in the bouncy house. Or if you'd rather Robert can get you a ride on one of the ponies," Cora suggested.
At that, Aidan's ears immediately perked up. "Can I ride a pony Mummy?" he asked.
"Hmmm," Anna responded, pretending to take her time to make a decision.
"Please," he begged.
"If Robert says you can, then I don't see why not," she said. Anna turned to face Robert, "Is it safe?"
"He couldn't be in better hands, you have my word," Robert replied as he motioned for John to hand Aidan over. He began walking off to the backyard with Aidan as they chatted away about the ponies.
John leaned over and whispered into her ear, "You know the last time Robert said those exact words to me, I broke my arm in two places not five minutes later."
"Are you serious?" she asked with wide eyes. Anna was ready to dash after Robert, before John broke into a fit of giggles. "That wasn't funny," Anna said as she playfully elbowed him.
"Oh don't worry Anna. Robert is as good with kids as he is with those horses. He practically is a big kid," she said good-naturedly. "Follow me into the kitchen, the girls are probably wondering where I've been off to. They'll be upset if they find out I've been hiding you away and keeping you both to myself."
Cora led the way into the kitchen area, while John and Anna trailed behind.
"It was all in good fun. I'm sorry love," John said as he pecked her cheek. "Please don't be cross with me." Anna had her arms crossed as she gave him an unreadable sideways glance. "Did I ever tell you, you've never looked more adorable than when you are fuming mad?" he asked. "Especially in that costume."
"No. That's probably because I've never been fuming mad with you. Even now I'm finding it hard to keep a serious face because you look utterly ridiculous in your costume," she said playfully.
"I guess it's a good thing I already landed the girl then. I'd hate to think this costume would hurt my chances with you," he said with a wink and a tip of his hat.
Anna sat on the veranda with the Crawley women as she watched John lead Aidan around on the pony. If they weren't careful they might end up going home with one, Sybil joked. She probably wouldn't have minded, seeing the smiles that graced both of their faces in that moment was enough to make her completely forget Henry for the evening.
"Aidan seems to be taking to John rather well," Mary noted in a very to-the-point sort of tone. She had come dressed as Snow White and forced Matthew to dress as Prince Charming; a role that suited him but not her at the moment.
"They are taken with one another. Sometimes, I dare say, I don't think I register on either of their radars when they are so enraptured with one another," Anna replied back.
"That sounds like the opposite effect that you would want with the man you are dating," Mary said as she sipped on a glass of wine.
"Actually, it suits me just fine. I mean I would have been happy if they had just got along. But to see that John loves Aidan and shows him just as much attention as he does me is more than I could have asked for.
"Don't get me wrong, I think it's important that Aidan accept him and vice versa. But..."
"But what?"
"I would imagine it doesn't leave you two with much time to yourselves," Mary said with a raised eyebrow. She was fishing for some indication as to just how serious John and Anna actually were.
"No, it doesn't," Anna replied almost immediately. "But if we were married this is what it would be like. Aidan would always be around and there will be times when we won't be able to be alone. I find it reassuring to know that we are just as happy with the three of us as we are when it's just the two of us," she explained.
"So you do already have marriage on the brain," Mary said with a mischievous grin.
"Not necessarily," Anna corrected Mary. Honestly, sometimes her friend could be like a dog with a bone and wouldn't let the issue just drop. "I mean, obviously I'm not looking for something casual though. Neither of us has even broached the subject of marriage, but I'd like to think that that's where we are headed in the long run. At the same time, I don't want him to feel obligated to marry me or to be put into the role of being Aidan's father. If I get married I want it to be for love," Anna said simply.
"I for one think it's terribly romantic," Sybil voiced.
"Like she would know after the way her and Tom were sneaking around for months," Edith pointed out while dressed as a flapper.
"Did I hear my name?" Tom asked as he came back from the kitchen. He was bandaged up like some burn victim to match with Sybil's nurse costume.
"We were just discussing how cute Anna and John are together. Then Edith had to make it seem like our story was somehow less romantic because we kept things secret from Dad," she explained.
"if I'm being quite honest I didn't think we were doing that great of a job keeping it secret. Before landing my job at the PR firm, Sybil was stopping by my mechanic shop nearly four times a week. My future father-in-law was either in denial or none too quick on the uptake," he said with an Irish burr. And they all began to laugh.
The sounds of the girls laughter carried across the lawn as John and Robert watched Aidan jump around in the bouncy castle. "Sounds like we are missing out on all the fun," Robert commented as he leaned against the fence of the corral.
John watched as Anna's body waved forward with each laugh that coursed through her body. He found himself smiling at her, just admiring her beauty in it's simplest form. For the first time in weeks she looked completely at ease and her laugh didn't sound forced or restrained. She looked phenomenal in her costume and the way the setting sun cast its light upon her face made her glow in a way he couldn't begin to describe.
"Hello in there," Robert said as he waved his hand in front of John's face.
"Huh?" John replied.
"Boy you've got it bad my friend," Robert remarked.
John shook his head with a chuckle. "How do you mean?"
"You and I both know I've been inviting you to this affair every single year since the girls were little and the last time you came was before you married Vera. Even then I could barely get you to wear a costume. Yet here you are playing the part of Captain Hook," he said. "You look happier than I've ever seen you and it's a nice change."
"I wish I could explain it Rob, but she has me bewitched. Sometimes I feel like I'm flying and falling all at once at just the sound of her voice on the other end of the phone. Everything seems to slow down and she's the only person I'm interested in being with in a room full of people. Well her and Aidan. She makes me laugh like no other," John expressed. Robert shot him a mock disapproving look. "Don't worry you still make me laugh. But with her it's different. I don't mind telling her all my secrets because she wouldn't judge me even on my worst day. She sees me, she pays attention to me, in a way much different than Vera. Anna doesn't care about my money. I really don't know what she sees in me, but I don't mind spending the rest of my days trying to figure it out. Does that sound crazy?" John asked.
"Jesus, you make me wonder if Cora and I are even if love at all," Robert said with a smirk before sipping on his beer. "Sounds sappy as hell though. I imagine that's what most women want to hear," he teased. "Good for you mate," Robert added before giving John a slap on the back.
"Thanks," John said with a sheepish grin.
"So…" Robert looked around to make sure that no one else was listening, "does this mean that marriage isn't completely out of the question for you anymore?" Robert knew that John had vowed after Vera that he would never marry again, but of course how could his friend have foreseen running into someone like Anna. He had to admit they made quite a pair and he loved Anna like a daughter, he couldn't have picked out a better match for his friend if he tried.
"I don't really know anymore. I thought I was doomed to wander the planet the rest of my days alone. But she makes me see things differently. Like the possibilities are endless," John replied.
"And there's no qualms about the idea of being a father figure to Aidan?" Robert asked. He was sure that John had taken all this into consideration before, but he figured it was his duty as best friend to John to guide him in the right direction.
"Honestly?" John shot back playfully. "No. Not a single one. If we never had children I'd be fine with us only having Aidan."
"Oh, goodness. You're already thinking of other little ones to add to the brood," Robert added with a small roll of the eye.
"No. Well, yes. I mean, she's still a young lady. I think it's only natural she would want more. And why shouldn't she? She's a great mum," John complimented.
"Easy Casanova. Let's just take things one step at a time. Anna's done the heartbreak thing before and the kid thing before. I'm not saying she doesn't love you or doesn't want those things. But you don't want to scare her off or make her feel rushed," Robert advised.
"I know. You're right," John said as he waved to Aidan who was riding one of the ponies.
"What are you boys talking about?" Anna asked. She made her way over to the corral and slid her arms around John as she snuggled against his side.
"Nothing just guy stuff. You know," Robert said.
"Having fun?" John asked in an attempt to change the subject.
"I am. But I think we should start heading back to my Dad's so Aidan can do his trick or treating with them," she said. "I don't want him staying out too late tonight. Especially, because I know my father already spoils him and will let him stay up past his bedtime They'll probably be watching scary movies."
"Shall I got get him ready to leave then?" John asked.
"No, I'll go collect him," she said with a smile. Anna headed over to the horses to grab Aidan and John couldn't help but watch as she walked away, her dress sashaying side to side with the natural movement of her hips.
John and Robert shared a laugh as they watched Anna negotiate with Aidan to get off of the horse. He didn't put up much of an argument, but he seemed very adamant about wanting to come back to which Robert had no objections. "Mummy, Uncle Robert says that I can come back any time I want to ride the horses," Aidan said proudly. He prattled on about the horses and all of their names as Anna carried him back in her arms.
"I see you wasted no time in getting him to call you 'Uncle'," John said under his breath as he elbowed his friend in the ribs.
"You'd be surprised how far a pony and some chocolate will get you with little ones," Robert replied with a wink. "I don't know what you are worried about, you said things are progressing nicely. Why not solidify myself as Uncle Robert in his life?" he whispered.
John raised a finger to his lips to silence Robert before Anna overheard him. He walked over to Anna and grabbed Aidan from her. "Did you have fun playing cowboy?" John asked as he tickled Aidan.
"I did. Can we go get some more candy now?" he asked.
"We certainly can, so long as you remember to stick to our deal that we split the chocolate fifty-fifty," John said before sticking his hand out.
Aidan high fived John, "Deal!"
"Well, thanks for having us over Robert and for the invitation for him to come back again for horse riding," John said.
"Oh no! Are you all leaving?" Cora asked as she walked up to them.
"We are," Anna said. "We made plans with my Dad before we were invited. Perhaps next time we can stay longer."
"Let me atleast get a photo of the three of you. You all look so cute in your matching costumes," Cora said as she whipped out her camera.
"Oh, that would be wonderful," Anna said.
John automatically pulled her in closer and they all smiled for the camera.
"That was a good one. Now let me just get one of each of you with Aidan," she said before snapping the camera again a few more times.
"You'll have to send those over to me at work when you get a chance," John instructed Cora.
"Of course, if you want I can get them developed and framed too," she offered.
"That won't be necessary. Wouldn't want you to go through all the trouble," Anna said.
"It's no trouble at all. John and Robert have been friends forever and you've known Mary since you were teenagers. It's the least I can do," she explained with a smile.
The doorbell rang and Charles wasted no time answering the door. He'd been eagerly awaiting his grandson's arrival all night. He was not disappointed to find Aidan standing at the door ready to greet him with a giant grin and his sack held open wide, "Trick or treat!"
"And who is this little chap?" Charles feigned ignorance while dressed as Frankenstein's monster. Elsie had helped him to paint his face and hands green and even used some costume makeup to attach fake bolts to the side of his neck. Of course his already large frame helped to pain the perfect portrait of Frankenstein's monster as he walked around the house in a zombie-like fashion.
Aidan looked offended as he said, "Grandpa, it's me."
"Of course, you've just gotten so big since I last saw you I almost didn't recognize you," Charles greeted as he picked up Aidan.
"Happy Halloween!" Anna and John said as they walked up to the door hand in hand.
"Same to you," Charles replied as he leaned forward to hug his daughter and shook John's hand.
"Where's Ms. Elsie?" Aidan asked.
As if on cue, Elsie entered the room dressed as the bride of Frankenstein and asked, "Did I hear someone say my name?" She wore a white tattered dress that was decorated in cobwebs and black trim. Elsie had her hair tucked underneath a black wig complete with white streaks up the sides in the shape of lightning bolts. Her makeup made her look pale as a ghost and Aidan had a good laugh when he saw her come to the door.
"It was me," Aidan answered as he shifted in Charles arms to get down. He ran over to Elsie and hugged her tightly before kissing her cheek.
"I must say, you are the most handsome Peter Pan I have ever seen," she complimented the little boy. "Give us a twirl so I can see the whole thing," Elsie instructed. Aidan did as she asked and Elsie stopped to snap a picture of him on her camera phone.
"Can we go get candy now?" he asked eagerly.
"We sure can, but save some space in that belly of yours. Elsie made homemade caramel covered apples," Charles said with wide eyes.
"Oh goodness, that sounds delicious," Anna said with a smile.
"Did you all have fun at the Crawleys?" her father asked as he helped Elsie into a coat.
"We did," John answered.
"I got to ride a horse. His name was Isis. And Uncle Robert told me I can come back anytime I want to ride him," Aidan reported proudly.
"Goodness, sounds like you went on quite an adventure," Elsie commented as she held out her hand for Aidan so they could walk around the neighborhood.
Aidan was thoroughly enjoying his sugar rush in his race for sweet concoctions as he ran ahead with his toy sword. He occasionally stopped to stomp and kick the newly fallen leaves that littered the ground like brightly colored pencil shavings. Anna could see the traces of fog emerging from his mouth as he ran faster and warned him it was getting too cold to not be wearing a jacket, but Aidan insisted he was fine as he ran up the walkway of the next house.
Charles stopped walking when they reached the driveway and stood there beside Anna as he eyed her curiously. "How are things...with, well everything I suppose?"
Anna rubbed her hands up and down her arm in an attempt to keep warm and gave off a small smile, "As well as they can be. I'm not completely over it and I probably never will be. But my therapist seems confident that things will get better with time now that I'm getting the help I needed."
"That sounds promising," he said trying to sound optimistic. It still killed him that she hadn't been more forthcoming sooner or that he hadn't been able to help her the way he wanted to. "And the nightmares?" he said in a low voice as he watched Aidan return from the door with waving a small bag of gummy bears triumphantly.
"They aren't gone completely, but they happen less frequently. I only get about halfway through them now before I realize I'm dreaming and I don't wake up nearly as panicked," Anna said as she looked behind her to see John chatting with Elsie as they caught up. "John helps me through them," she reported.
"I'm glad you both found each other. I know I wasn't too welcoming of him when you first introduced me to him. But I can see that he's good for you...the both of you," Charles said with tender eyes. They continued to follow Aidan, their bodies getting closer with each step.
"Thanks, Dad. That means alot to me," Anna replied as she turned her head to face him.
"I never wanted you to be lonely; that wasn't my intention," he clarified.
"I know that," she answered with a half smile. Her hands were buried in her pockets and her eyes avoided his as she thought back on all the lost time between them. It wasn't as if they hadn't seen each other in the years since being with Henry, but even she could admit that things had not been the same. Her guarded and secretive nature that resulted from her time with him had made it impossible to be as close with Charles as she had been before. Anna had expressed to her therapist that she wanted to get back to the way things used to be, but she had to remind Anna to be patient with herself and that some things would never go back to the way they were. Anna looked regretful as she stared back at her father; she only wished she had been more brave and could have trusted him not to overreact all those years ago.
Aidan ran up to her and opened his candy sack wipe to reveal all he had been able to collect so far. Anna and her father "ooohed" and "aaahed" in all the right places before heading to the next house down the lane. "In case I never told you before, I hope you know you've done a wonderful job with him," Charles complimented her. "I always knew you'd be a great mother, but I see how happy and smart he is and it warms my heart to know you did that all by yourself Anna. No one can take that from you. I'm just glad you were courageous enough to leave on your own before he had a chance to hurt you both," he said.
Anna practically threw herself into his arms as she squeezed her father tightly. She could feel his body relax against hers when he rested his hand against her back. His cheek came to rest on the top of her head as he cradled her closer. She pulled back to look at the man who had raised her and felt nothing but gratitude and love for him. "I learned from the best," she said before placing a kiss on his cheek.
They both had tears in their eyes as they watched Aidan come back from the door. "Grandpa! Look! The lady at the door gave me a yo-yo. Can you teach me how to use it?" Aidan shouted as he came back down the walkway.
"I would love to," Charles replied as he picked Aidan up and they made their way to the next house.
John and Elsie were walking at a slow pace behind Anna and Charles; allowing the two a moment of privacy to hopefully reconnect and mend fences. John turned to face Elsie as they kept up with the group, "I never thanked you properly for how you helped me with Anna." Her face grew serious as she regarded his comment. "I know it couldn't have been easy for you to tell me what you did or trust me after knowing me for such a short time."
"Well, I didn't want to, but I had a feeling you weren't one to give up so easily. And I thought it was better you heard it from me than to try and get it out of Anna. It only would have damaged your relationship. It could have even ended it. I couldn't watch Anna self destruct that way," she reasoned. "I think losing you would have only hurt her more."
Even though he was sure he had already gotten Ms. Hughes seal of approval long ago, hearing her say those words only solidified the sentiment. "I hope I didn't cause any hard feelings between the two of you," he said apologetically.
"Oh, it would take a lot more than that to drive a wedge between me and Anna. I know she feels I broke a confidence, but I'd like to think that deep down she knows I did it for the right reasons," Elsie said.
"I'm sure she does," he said as they continued to walk the pavement. Even if he and Anna weren't in a relationship he was glad that she had someone like Elsie to fill that mother-figure role for her. John didn't know what he would have done had Elsie not been there or been aware of what was going on with Anna. "How is she doing at work?"
"She's good. I'm actually hoping to retire in the next year or two and was hoping I could convince Anna to take over for me since she already does so much there," Elsie said.
"And you don't think she'll do it?" he asked with intrigue.
Elsie shook her head in disagreement. "I used to think she was holding back because of Aidan. Now I don't know what to think. She finished her degree in business, it just never made sense why she didn't go find a job where she could make more money."
This was new information to John. He knew Anna had gone to university, but he hadn't realized she finished school. "I guess after her ordeal it would have seemed easier and safer to be around someone she was more familiar with," he guessed.
"Perhaps. I just don't want her hanging around the restaurant out of duty to me or because she doesn't feel safe trying something new. I know she's a smart girl, she's capable of achieving more for herself and Aidan. I wont be the cause of why she's tied down to a job or place she doesn't want to be," Elsie said.
"Well, while it is possible she's doing it for you I don't think it would be out of loyalty, but more rather that she enjoys helping you and returning the favor. After all you've been like a mother to her. But I suspect that her decision to play it safe has more to do with that bloke that broke her heart," John said. They stopped to watch Anna and Charles share a hug up ahead of them. "I appreciate you letting me know about your plans. Not that I'd want to take Anna from you, but I think I might have a position over at the PR firm that would be a good fit for Anna."
"That would be fantastic," she said. "I would hate to see her leave of course, but I want her to be happy in whatever she chooses to do."
"I imagine that's why it has been hard for her to leave. You've been such a good Mum to her that the unfamiliar is a little daunting right now," John assured her. "But she has all of us to help her over this rough patch and if she isn't' ready to leave in a few months from now then we try again later."
"I think I see now why Anna is so fond of you," Elsie said with a knowing smile.
"Oh really? Why's that?" he asked.
"You remind me so much of my Charles," Elsie said with a smile.
After Anna was sure Aidan was settled for the night she and John left him with Elsie and her father. She was certain he was in good hands, but Anna was never good about letting Aidan out of her sight. The car ride back had been relatively quiet as they both battled a case of nerves and struggled to find something to talk about.
When they arrived back at Anna's the both of them meandered around awkwardly before sitting on the couch together. It was the first time in months that they had been left completely alone that they weren't sleeping or when temptation hadn't proved too great to resist.
"Should I fix us something to drink?" Anna offered with her hands nervously placed on her knees.
John thought about her words for a moment before answering, "No. I think I'm okay."
She bit down on her bottom lip and brushed a loose strand of hair back behind her ear. "Would you like to watch a movie?"
John turned to look at her intensely, his eyes darkening the more he stared at her. "No. I rather like what I'm looking at right now," he answered back in a raspy voice. John's arm stretched across the length of the couch to extend a silent invitation for her to move closer to him.
Anna pulled away momentarily, but only to say, "I think I'm going to get out of this costume and slip into something more comfortable."
John nearly gulped at her words, "Oh...okay." His eyes never broke from her as she trailed out of the living room and back to her bedroom. Meanwhile, John took the opportunity to discard his Captain's jacket and tossed his hat across the room on a nearby recliner. He slid his boots off and placed them by the door before heading back to the couch. John was sure he smelled none too fresh after wearing the jacket all night; his cologne was still in the bedroom and so he reached for the nearest thing he could find. He took an air freshener and read the contents, "Forest Pine." "Good enough," he thought to himself. John stood up and sprayed the air freshener a few feet in front of him and did a twirl as he walked through it hoping that it had absolved him of any other smells that might be lingering. After setting the can down he turned back to see Anna standing in the hallways leaning against the frame of the doorway. She looked like a vision in a pink camisole and matching shorts that were exposing far too much leg, but not nearly enough for his liking.
"Do I smell pine?" she asked innocently.
"Uh, yeah," John answered back nervously as he ran a hand through his hair. When she turned her head toward a small sound she heard in the back yard, John waved his hand back and forth to minimize the potency of the smell.
"Did you hear that?" she asked in concern.
"It's probably nothing," he wrote it off. The only thing that was capturing his attention right now was her. Anna didn't realize it, but she had been teasing his mind all evening and it had taken everything he had not to sneak off with her into one of the many unoccupied rooms in the Crawley house and ravish her then and there.
"What if it's a burglar?" she wondered aloud.
"He'll have to get through me to get to you," John assured her as he guided her down on the couch to sit beside him.
"That's quite the image," Anna commented.
"Hopefully, one that turns you on," John quipped as his fingers traced the length of her arm only to tangle with her own fingertips.
"Mmm, very much so. I rather enjoy the idea of you fighting for my honor," she teased as her hand ran up his chest, following the trail of buttons that led to the coarse thatch of hair nestled at the 'v' of his shirt.
John sharply sucked in a breath of air and let his eyes roll to the back of his head in ecstasy. Months of abstinence and taking things slow or being interrupted by a four year old had been a lesson in patience to say the least. He didn't mind of course, but it made every moment with her all the more sweet and exhilarating.
It started off slow, with butterfly kisses that barely skimmed the skin. Their labored breaths increased as they both tried desperately to get their fill of one another. He let Anna set the pace but was surprised to find that she was an almost too eager partner as she fought for domination of his mouth. He tried making sure this was what she wanted on more than one occasion but her failure to cease her actions were all the indication he needed that she wanted to move forward. Her hands running through his hair spurred him on as her fingertips massaged his scalp and tugged at his hair relentlessly. John's brain told him it was a bad idea-that it was too soon. But other parts of John's body told him otherwise.
"God, you looked incredible in your costume tonight," he managed to say between kisses. Before he knew it her legs swung over his so that she was sitting on his lap and John's hands gripped at her bottom. Her small breast, while still encased within the confines of her bra and shirt, were hanging in front of his face and the desire to hold one of them in the palm of his hand was becoming unbearably painful as his pants began to tent.
"Why, thank you. You weren't so bad yourself, Captain," she replied in a husky voice and bit down on her bottom lip. Without further delay, Anna began working on removing his shirt, all the while her lips explored his neck and the expanse between his collarbone and shoulder. Her tongue flicked rapidly and her lips fluctuated in pressure as they made contact with his skin over and over again. His rough hands settled on either side of her hips as she leaned over him, he squeezed gently as she began to roll her hips into him. He let out a groan she hadn't heard from him before and immediately stopped her movements. "Did I hurt you?" she asked.
"No. It feels great. Almost too good," he said with a chuckle as he regained his composure. "But…" John moved his hand behind his back and fished out an action figure from the couch cushions that had been digging into his leg, "I could do without this guy." She laughed against his mouth as she kissed him once more. He stopped her this time feeling that the urge to be with one another was becoming stronger. "If you want to stop at any point in time, Anna, you have to promise me you'll let me know," he said in a lecturing tone.
"I promise," Anna said softly before placing a kiss on the tip of his nose. Her focus was on removing the last button from his shirt and she quickly helped him shrug it off before tossing it aside. She resumed her ministrations but began to chortle in his ear when she caught wind of the pine scent on his clothing.
"What's so funny?" he asked.
"Nothing. It's just," she whispered in his ear, "I'll never look at a can of pine scented air freshener the same way ever again."
"Awww, I had a feeling you caught me," John said as he let his palm hit his face.
"Well, I wasn't sure, but I had an inkling. Your musky, wooded pine smell only confirmed it. It's too bad you didn't go as a lumberjack for Halloween," she said with a flirtatious grin.
"Oh, is that what one of your fantasies are?"
"No, but I wouldn't kick you out of bed if you approached me dressed in such a way," she teased.
John hitched her pajama bottoms up a little more so that he could run his fingers along her thighs. His hands danced along her edges tracing their way down as far as his arms would reach all the way back up to her waist. John stopped to tickle her ribs a little and they both laughed when she squirmed in his arms.
He didn't know why he felt so nervous considering how she had opened up with him about everything, but it was a little different when it was one's first time engaging in such acts after going without for so long. Especially because Anna wasn't just any girl. Had this been Vera, he wouldn't have even stopped to ask her what she wanted. Vera wanted a man that took control and didn't ask questions. Anna wanted an equal, a partner that shared in her vigor and passion, someone who could give as well as take. "Anna, may I?" John asked as his hands reached out for the straps of her camisole. His fingers played with the strap before hovering just above her breasts.
She nodded in silent approval and pressed her torso into him more so that his fingers made contact with her body.
They both moaned as their hands roamed across one anothers bodies. John's eyes darkened when they met with hers. Anna's hair was draped above him as she peppered his cheeks with kisses. He smiled when she pulled away and saw that her cheek and lips were red from rubbing against his scruff. She nipped at his ear and he moved his hands to the back of her head to grip at her hair.
"No. No! No!" she screamed in protest.
John's hands immediately let go of her hair and she scrambled to get off of him. "What? What happened?" he said out of breath. He reached out to touch her but she only crouched further in the corner of the couch. "Anna, I'm…I'm sorry," he stammered. He wasn't sure what he did wrong, but whatever it was he truly hadn't intended to scare or hurt her.
Her legs were pulled up to her chest as her arms were wrapped around them, keeping herself tight like a ball. "It wasn't you...I had a flashback. He pulled my hair once before," Anna said quietly and wiped at her eyes.
"Oh gosh, love. I didn't mean to…" he began to speak but she cut him off.
"I know you didn't mean too. I don't blame you one bit. In fact I wouldn't blame you if you walked out of here right now," she said with glassy eyes.
John sat there with her, his chest exposed as he linked his fingers together. "Why are you so eager to push me away?" he asked.
"What?"
"Anna, I know what you went through. Maybe not all of it, but I believe you've shared as much with me as you will ever be comfortable with. And it doesn't bother me. At the end of the day I still love you, with or without the sexual aspect of our relationship," he said.
"You're sure it doesn't bother you?" she asked shyly.
"I'm positive. I had a feeling we were moving too fast. I thought you were pushing yourself and I don't want you to do that. You don't have to prove anything to me," he said as he tilted her chin up to face him. "Maybe, until you are sure you're ready we...um...keep the clothes on and avoid touching certain…," he cleared his throat and motioned downward with his head, "areas."
"I'm sorry," she said again.
"It's fine. But I need to go walk off this...situation. You're far too beautiful right now. Just promise me you'll stop apologizing," he said with a smile. John rose from the couch and kissed the top of her head as he walked past her and headed to the bathroom.
She smiled weakly as he excused himself and wondered to herself if they would ever move on from her past.