Jane's shoulders began to droop dejectedly while Maura continued to rub them. It felt like every time Jane turned around, she found another way she had hurt Maura. It was always inadvertent, she never meant it, but whatever Jane had done each time, Maura was profoundly injured.

She had to stop it. This wasn't like forgetting to pick up milk or leaving dirty dishes in the sink. Jane had a habit of being inconsiderate toward Maura. Taking her for granted. Expecting her to be there, to listen and comfort Jane when she needed it. Jane couldn't remember the last time she'd done something similar for Maura. No, all Jane ever did was take her out to dinner a couple times. She'd gotten so used to Maura taking care of her that she'd forgotten to take care of Maura.

Jane sometimes joked that Maura was like a robot or a computer. She knew so much about so many different things, and sometimes she talked like an encyclopedia. She didn't mean to imply that Maura didn't have feelings. Of course she did, she just hid them well. Maybe it was because kids picked on her or because her parents were… whatever. It didn't matter why, it just mattered that Jane knew and could be the one person Maura felt safe with. Jane wanted to be there for Maura. To comfort her when she needed it.

Maura didn't trust easily, not when it came to her emotions. They only became friends after she first put Hoyt away, and even then Maura had been hesitant and awkward. It wasn't until much later that she let down her guard enough to tell Jane about the way she'd grown up. Then as soon as Maura felt comfortable enough to open up to her, Jane shot herself. No wonder she hadn't said anything about realizing she was in love.

She didn't trust easily and she didn't say when she was upset, but Jane had begun to learn her tells. She'd shop online when she was anxious. She used random facts to fill awkward silences. She'd smooth out her skirt when she was uncomfortable. Like she was smoothing out the bumps in a conversation. She twisted her ring or she'd touch her lips when she was uncertain about the future. And of course she'd get hives when she tried to hide something and hyperventilate when she anticipated being judged by her mother.

Jane couldn't think of another time Maura had just blurted out something like this, with no filter. "You weren't breathing that day you shot yourself outside the precinct." It stung and Jane couldn't help but think it was meant to sting. To put Jane in her place, and maybe to let her know that Maura's terror didn't end when Jane blacked out. That maybe Maura had been terrified every time Jane put herself in danger, ever since. Maybe to Maura, Echo's delivery was just another potential hazard for Jane, and that was why Maura was so on edge.

Jane pushed her shoulders back and reassured herself. She could handle this. She could be Maura's comfort and shoulder to lean on and listening ear and all that. She might have to push a little, but when Maura opened up Jane would be there for her. And they'd be stronger for it.

Jane had mentally pumped herself up for the task ahead by the time the class was over. She had six hours of promised cuddle time awaiting her, and all she wanted to do was hold onto Maura. Wrap her arms around Maura's warmth and fall asleep so they could wake up together, refreshed, with the past solidly behind them. But she knew it wasn't going to be that easy, and trying to forget about that day wasn't going to work.

Maura helped Jane stand, then gathered their things. They'd decided to opt out of the hospital tour, being familiar with much of the facility already. (Aside from each of their various emergencies, they'd even spent time in the nursery with that baby Maura delivered during their spa day a couple years back.) Watching the other parents leave with Sarah, Jane reconsidered their plans. Maybe looking at some healthy gurgly cherub faces was exactly what Maura needed to feel better about delivery.

"Hey, Maur," Jane tried to sound upbeat. "Wanna go see the newborns?" She lightly grazed Maura's elbow and smiled hopefully when she was rewarded with eye contact. "Bet they're real cute."

One corner of Maura's mouth slid upwards in the beginnings of a smirk. So far, so good, Rizzoli. She gave a slight nod to the affirmative. Jane plucked the tote bag of notes from Maura's grasp, put it over one shoulder, and claimed the now empty hand.

They stopped in the hallway outside the nursery and stood side-by-side, peering in the large picture window. Jane wasn't really sure what to do next. It wasn't like the babies were going to get up and put on a show or anything. They were just sleeping, all three of them, two with elongated heads under their tiny pink and blue hats, all of them with little mittens on their hands to keep them from scratching. "They look kind of like old people when they're this young, don't they?"

Maura's head tilted, trying to see what Jane was talking about.

"Like, all wrinkled and pink?"

"They'll grow out of that." Maura's voice was quiet, almost whispering, as if she would wake the babies if she spoke too loudly.

Jane looked down at their hands, still clasped, then back up at Maura, who was staring at the babies. She stood there for a moment, watching Maura watch the babies. Jane couldn't quite place the look on Maura's face, but she got the impression that Maura felt more than a pane of glass separating her from that nursery.

"We still have to pick a name," Jane tried again to get Maura to say something. She squinted to see the tags on the babies. "Todd. Michael. Isabella. Isabella isn't bad. Kind of girly." Jane glanced at Maura again; Maura scrunched her nose in contempt. Jane stifled a laugh. Jane let go of Maura's hand and instead put her arm around Maura's shoulders. "Ok, not Isabella." Maura rested her head on Jane's shoulder.

This is better, Jane thought. With Maura's head resting there, Jane could feel the gentle rise of Maura's chest as she breathed. She could feel the tickle of Maura's hair on her lips. This is almost… It would have been exactly the right thing if she were holding Maura with both arms. If she had the right words to say to make Maura know that whatever happened, it would be ok. They would always be best friends and Jane would always be there for her. It would have been perfect if she'd been able to do it three years ago.

When Jane shot herself, she was thinking clearly. She knew what she was doing and in those moments when Bobby grabbed her by the neck and dragged her up the stairs and outside, she knew she had to end that hostage situation as quickly as possible. Every minute counted for Frankie and none of the officers on the street could get a clean shot. Jane knew that if she could position the barrel appropriately, she'd be able to incapacitate Bobby. As long as she didn't hit any of her own major organs, she could spare the minutes waiting for an ambulance; Frankie couldn't.

What she didn't count on was Maura emerging from the precinct just in time to see it happen. Jane didn't consider that Maura would be anywhere nearby, that she'd run toward the gunfire outside the building instead of staying safely inside to wait for help. The last thing she remembered thinking before blacking out was, Why is Maura here? But when she woke up hours later in the hospital, Maura wasn't there, and Jane thought no more of it. Her Ma and Pop were there instead, gushing and scolding and wearing down what little energy Jane had left after major trauma and surgery. All Jane wanted to do was sleep.

Maura didn't visit until five days later.

Jane had been flipping channels for a solid forty-five minutes. No way was she going to subject herself to one of those 'talk shows' where people threw chairs at each other. Her only other choices seemed to be soaps and cartoons. She was about to settle in for a Bugs Bunny short when she heard a light tapping on the open hospital room door.

Maura was wearing one of her high-fashion outfits. Looked like she had stopped by before a hot date. But then Maura always looked impeccable. Jane noticed the way her four-inch heels made her calf muscles pop out to say hello before her eyes wandered up to find white knuckles clasping a box of chocolates and a tight smile.

Jane wrenched her mouth to the side and snarked, "Well, if it isn't my best friend, coming to visit me five days into my hospital stay! Was there a sale at Saks?"

Maura's face dropped immediately and she balked, like she wanted to turn and run away, but Jane's voice kept her there. "What's that, chocolate? Ok, you're forgiven!" Maura still said nothing and didn't move until Jane beckoned her over, patting a spot next to her on the bed. "C'mon, tell me everything."

Maura smoothed her dress and perched on the edge of the bed, not really putting any of her weight down. She cleared her throat, took a deep breath, and started, "Jane."

Jane had pulled open the box and found a fudge cluster, immediately stuffing the whole thing in her mouth. "Mmm, fanks Maur." She chewed and swallowed enough to speak more clearly. "You don't know what they've been feeding me in here. Cardboard." She picked up a bonbon and examined it, trying to figure out what was inside. "This is exactly what I needed."

"You're welcome." Maura watched her bite into the bonbon and chew. It seemed to pass the test.

"You want one?" Jane held out the box.

"No, thank you."

Jane leaned back and set the box aside, sated for the time being. "So what's the gossip? What am I missing? Frost said they're remodeling BRIC and the crime lab, there was so much damage."

Maura nodded in the affirmative, finally starting to look comfortable. "The morgue at headquarters will be closed for two weeks while the work is done. I'm working out of the old medical examiner's office at Boston Medical Center for the duration."

"Well I hope they get the morgue up and running again before I come back to work. I'm not going all the way to Boston Med to see you."

Maura looked down at her hands. She was playing with her ring. "No, I don't suppose you would."

Jane leaned forward and swatted Maura's arm. "Hey, I'm only kidding! You know I can't get enough of your autopsies." Jane grinned and winked, but Maura didn't see.

Maura stared at the spot Jane swatted then finally looked back up at Jane and smiled again. That tight-lipped almost-smile that she came in with. Then she stood, smoothed her dress again, and said, "I'm happy to see you're feeling better."

"Aww, c'mon, Maur, you don't have to go, you just got here!"

But Maura was already in the doorway. "No, I should be getting back to work." She paused and looked back at Jane, who made her best attempt at puppy dog eyes, then turned just in time to bump into Dr. Slucky.

"Oh, Doctor Isles, aren't we looking lovely today?" Jane saw him look Maura up and down, the slimy bastard.

Maura did a double-take. "Hello, Doctor…"

"Slucky. Doctor Byron Slucky? A faulty memory is forgivable," he said, even though Maura didn't seem the slightest bit embarrassed. No, she looked more disgusted than anything else, especially when he touched her arm. "You were rather agitated last time you were here."

Maura glanced at Jane, startled worry creasing her face. "I, um," she stammered, obviously looking for an out.

Jane offered it. "Hands off, Doc. That's my best friend." Maura immediately relaxed, her eyes widening.

Slucky kind of shrugged, but pulled a card out of his pocket. "If you ever need anything, give me a call."

Jane rolled her eyes and let out a pronounced groan.

Maura took the card and thanked him, then left. Jane shouted after her, "Don't be a stranger!"

Last time you were here. Those words didn't strike Jane as odd when Slucky said them, but there outside the hospital nursery, thinking back to that day and that conversation, she realized they didn't make any sense. That was the first time Maura had visited Jane in the hospital. Unless… Oh. She had been there while Jane was in surgery. Which would explain how Ucky Slucky knew her name.

That whole conversation sounded different with Jane's new perspective, knowing how Maura had felt about her at the time. Jane had been flip. She didn't notice how uncomfortable Maura was, and more important, she didn't let Maura say what she'd come to say. Which was probably how she felt. That she loved Jane.

There was just one thing Jane didn't understand. She lifted her chin from Maura's forehead and gently squeezed her shoulder. Almost whispering, she asked, "Why did you date Slucky?"

Maura looked up at her, puzzled, then looked back at the babies. One of them was being wheeled away, presumably to his mother's room. Maura sighed and shrugged. "I couldn't have you."

"But—" Jane stopped herself. Listen. Her hand moved over Maura's shoulder, tacitly urging her to say more.

"He was a good match for me. On paper." Maura's eyes dropped, then she laughed. "He was awful, wasn't he?"

Jane laughed, too. "Yeah. He really was."

Maura sobered and she looked at Jane's eyes, then lips, then breasts. "I liked the way you acted when he was there."

Jane kissed her head. "What way?"

"Protective. Almost. Jealous. Possessive." Maura closed her eyes. "There were moments when I believed I was yours."

"I was jealous." Maura opened her eyes again and looked at her questioningly. "Yeah. He was taking you away from me. I mean, I didn't think you belonged to me, but. I missed you."

Maura smiled sadly, then tilted her chin up and closed her eyes, requesting a kiss that Jane happily delivered.