AN: Thanks so much for the reviews! I love you all! So now we're gonna start seeing a whole new Layla! Woo! Lemme know what you think
Chapter 23
Air is thin now.
While my lungs are collapsing,
Vertigo blankets my head.
Far from reckless,
When I'm comfortable, thought
That I know I could never forget.
(That I know I could never forget)
I come alive,
When I'm falling down.
I let myself go,
'Til I hit the ground.
When I'm there, at the edge,
In this moment I feel it I know.
Come alive when I'm falling down.
I Come Alive by The Used
Damon's POV
I understand the words I just don't know why she said them. My brain isn't working like it should. Blood bag for her? But why? She looks back up at me with the +strangest expression. She looks confused and terrified. She's still a bloody mess but she doesn't seem to be in pain even though she should be.
"Damon, I don't want to die. I'm sure you're thinking of trying to give me an out, give me a run down of the pros and cons of this whole thing because you weren't given a choice. But I've made up my mind; I have to finish the transition. I can't die." It clicks. I just wish I wasn't hearing this right now. Like I said before it would have come up eventually but her choice was stolen from her. She was raped of her humanity. This is all my fault. I'm frozen in my spot.
"Say something. Why aren't you speaking to me?" She's hurt, but she's so damn strong. So much stronger than she thinks.
"I shouldn't have left you alone." She looks taken aback and then slightly irritated.
"Are you kidding me? Don't you dare go there. You are not that person, you don't do stupid guilt. You did not do this. It had nothing to do with you." Even now when she looks half dead she's challenging me. She's looking at me with that defiant expression. I don't deserve her.
"If I would have never dragged you into this crazy world of mine you wouldn't be hurt right now." She has the audacity to scoff and shake her head. She's reminding me of…me.
"Shut the hell up! If I hadn't met you I'd still be in this position right now. My mother would still be a vampire and she still would have eventually come to me. Maybe she would have killed me rather than do this. I think the only reason she didn't is because you showed up when you did. I'm not dead Damon, not really. And if you don't stop being an idiotic jerk then I am going to die. Stop being an ass and go grab me a blood bag. If you say one more word about this being your fault I'm going to snap. I love you damnit, you saved me if you want to admit it or not." She's right. I run to the basement, an actual laugh escapes me. I'm glad she calls me out on my bullshit. If it were anyone else I'd snap their neck.
When I get back to my room I take a seat next to her. I grip the blood bag in my hands and give her a stern look.
"I'm not going to try to talk you out of this. Truth is even if you would have told me you'd rather die I know I would have ended up shoving blood down your throat anyway. I don't want you to die either." She reaches out for the bag but I put it behind me. Irritation comes across her beautiful blood soaked face.
"When I give you this you're going to be hit by a lot of really ugly emotions. Everything you feel is going to hit you tenfold. Your pain, sadness, anger, guilt, it's all going to be amplified. I know you well enough to know that you're going to be a wreck for a while. You're doing an awfully good job at holding yourself together right now but that woman obviously tortured you, that's going to hit you like a ton of fucking bricks. And you are going to have to listen to me ok? No matter what you feel, no matter how bad it hurts, I need you to hear my voice through it all. Because you are going to make it through this. I love you Layla…maybe remembering that will help you too." She's smiling a little and that's enough for me to hand her the bag. "You only have to drink a little to complete it." She nods her head and brings the bag to her lips.
In one long gulp her eyes go wide. She sets the bag beside her and I pick her up a moment later. I rip the remains of her clothes from her as I set her down in the shower with me. I take my time washing the blood from her body. The cuts and scratches are healing before my eyes. She seems fascinated by the blood spiraling down the drain. It's all captivating and overwhelming at first. The lights the sounds all of it is too much to process.
"Layla, are you ok?" Wild emerald eyes meet mine in shock. It's like she forgot I was here. I take her wet face in my hands. Her expression softens substantially.
"You are so beautiful." I find myself smirking in spite of the situation. I'm beautiful? I wonder if most men would be offended by that.
"You're something else." She smiles widely. I bring my lips to her forehead and just like that the crying begins. A painful sounding cry escapes her. I knew it was coming.
Her knees buckle but I'm there to catch her. I wrap her in a warm towel and carry her to bed. I pull a pair of boxer briefs on and pull her against my chest. I'll let her cry for a while because she needs it, but I can't let it go on for too long or she'll get lost in her despair. It's way too easy to get stuck on one shitty feeling at the beginning.
"Why'd she do this to me Damon? I don't think I can live with myself forever." I press kisses to the top of her head. Forever…with Layla.
"Yes you can. I'm going to get you through this, you'll be ok. Besides you get to look forward to me annoying the shit out of you for eternity." She chuckles weakly into my chest.
Her tear streaked face is beautiful. She tentatively reaches out and touches my cheek. Just like that she's gone from sad to happy. It will be a whirlwind of back and forth emotions.
"Think you can really put up with me for eternity? I tend to piss you off a lot. I'm stubborn and I don't like you telling me what to do. Even if my mother wouldn't have taken me I would have snuck out to see her. I didn't want anyone near her…she would have tried to hurt Elena and Caroline too." She does piss me off. When she thinks of doing crazy reckless things I want to lock her away.
"I hope you realize you're an idiot for wanting to do that. Might as well just offer yourself up in a silver platter to Klaus while you're at it. I've spent way too long babysitting everyone around this damn place, I don't want to do the same thing with you. You keep telling me you love me. If that's true then stop being irresponsible. If she would have killed you…I don't know what I would have done. I sure as fuck wouldn't be alive to suffer the pain of losing you though." She looks like she might slap me.
"Don't say things like that! You are way too strong of a person to say you'd kill yourself if I died. You're a hundred and seventy three years old, there's no way that I'm so important that you would end yourself on my account. You've been through way worse." She's insane. I need to kiss her. I don't want to push too much on her at once but I have to do this.
I intend on just giving her a peck on the lips, short and sweet…even though that's not really my style. Of course Layla being Layla she completely takes me off guard and blows my plans to hell. She almost instantly kisses me back with a passion I don't think ive ever felt from her. She flips me on my back with ferocity. Shit, she's strong now. That will take some getting used to. Her towel falls from her body leaving her wonderfully naked. I don't think she's ever looked more beautiful than she does right now. She goes right back to kissing me with abandon, grinding wantonly against my quickly growing arousal. Just when we're about to get to the good stuff she pulls back with a gasp. Her eyes have turned red, black veins showing above her cheeks, fangs descending. She reaches up with a finger to press against her new teeth. I can't tell what she's thinking.
"I-I'm sorry." I kiss her again even though she tries to protest.
"Why are you sorry? I've vamped out on you before. It's normal. Besides its kinda sexy princess." She laughs and the monster in her begins to fade.
"As much as I'd love to have some really rough hot vampire sex I think you need to feed." Her eyes flash red again.
"I've never felt hunger like this…or is it thirst? It's kind of overwhelming." I nod at hher sympathetically. It's a bitch to get under control.
"I need to teach you how to feed properly…if you'll let me." She sits back in silence for a moment.
"I think that's for the best. I don't want to deny what I am. I need to learn how to do this properly so I don't go off the rails. I don't want to kill anyone." Thank God she's not going to be like Stefan, eating animals is just so ridiculous. And Elena drinks entirely from blood bags and the occasional bunny. She's way too moral.
"It's almost inevitable that you'll kill someone one day. Even Blondie killed someone. Elena has a clean track record so far. But I will do everything in my power to keep you from ripping someones throat out. We'll leave the hiding corpses and covering your tracks lesson for another day." She shoves me a little too hard making me stumble. Surprisingly she cracks up at that.
"If I ever hit you again it might actually hurt you now." I growl at her and throw her naked body over my shoulder.
It isn't until I have us in the hallway that I realize we're not alone.
"What the hell are you guys doing!?" It's Caroline that squeaks at us but six people are standing outside my bedroom. Yea…six people staring at my girlfriends naked ass.
"Damon…put me down…right now." She sounds mortified and quickly retreats to her bedroom, getting dressed I'm guessing.
"Leave the door open!" She lets out a sigh but complies.
I turn back to the people standing there all looking confused and embarrassed. The look on Jeremy and Matt's faces are priceless.
"She's hot right?" Jeremy snickers causing his judgey little witch friend to smack the back of his head.
"It is so not the right time for that. She was kidnapped and obviously tortured Damon. How can you be joking at a time like this? You were a wreck a few hours ago." Leave it to Barbie to try to bring me down. No need to make a shitty situation shittier. I need to keep Layla happy right now.
"I think we all need to go downstairs and have a little chat. There's a lot to talk about." Everyone seems to agree. Only Elena stays as everyone else starts to go down the stairs.
"Something really bad happened didn't it?" I think she really cares for Layla.
"Yea…its not exactly good. Go downstairs. We'll be down in a minute." She nods her head and smiles a little…weird.
"Do us all a favor and put some pants on Damon." I forgot I'm only in my underwear. I really don't care if I'm clothed or not but this conversation might be less awkward if I'm wearing clothes.
Layla's POV
I am completely and utterly embarrassed beyond belief. I'm actually pretty self conscious..except with Damon. So the fact that two of my best friends, my boyfriends brother that's practically family to me, and a handful of other people saw me naked kinda has me not wanting to leave my room.
At least my bashfulness is blocking out the torrent of emotions swirling inside of me. I'm a vampire…I cant even process that yet. Plus side I can be with Damon for as long as he'll have me and I won't age and die while he remains godlike in his beauty.
My mother tormented me in a way I didn't think possible physically but I know it's far from over. It's pretty depressing that I didn't expect anything less than hell from her. I hope my words stung her a little. Will I actually have to kill her? I know for a fact Damon won't allow her to live.
I can't focus my thoughts for very long. I feel as if I can think about a million things at once now though. When Damon kissed me earlier I don't know what came over me. I just wanted him so badly. And thinking about it makes me want him again. Every little touch felt amazing.
I also feel hungry as hell. And I can literally hear the heartbeat and the blood running through Jeremy and Matt's veins downstairs. I think I'm about to lose it.
"Damon!" He's just a room over but he's at my side in a split second, pulling a t shirt over his gorgeous body.
"What's wrong?" Was the desperation that clear in my voice?
"I think Matt and Jeremy need to leave. I can hear their blood." He lets out an inaudible noise.
"Fuck, I swear I'm on the verge of becoming brain dead lately. I should have realized. I'll grab you a couple blood bags alright? Might as well start learning control now." How very Damon like of him to put peoples lives on the line to teach me control.
"You really think that's a good idea?" He shrugs his shoulders nonchalantly.
"There's four vampires other than you in this house, and a witch. There's no way you'd even get the chance to attack one of them. So c'mon, I'll keep a hold on you." He winks and wraps an arm around my waist.
When we get into the living room everyone stops their conversation and stares at me in astonishment. What the hell?
"You look fine. That makes no sense. You looked like you'd been through a cheese grater last night." That's a very blunt way for Jeremy to put it. Last night? Everything happened in the very early morning hours before the sun had risen but it's already late afternoon now. Wow.
I don't know how to start this conversation. I'm waiting for Damon to make some witty or smart ass comment to get it out there but he's uncharacteristically silent. I can see the vein in Jeremys throat. I'm fighting my vampire nature very hard, I don't want to scare anyone but I can't stand it.
"Get me a blood bag now Damon." I speak through gritted teeth. There's a collective gasp in the room. I turn my body so I can hide my face in Damon's chest. My fangs come out the second I face away from everyone. His arm tightens around me. He whispers that it's ok in my ear and rubs a soothing hand up and down my back.
"Stef, go grab a couple bags." I hear him speed out of the room. I can do that now can't I?
"Oh Layla. This shouldn't have happened. I'm so sorry." Elena embraces me from behind, she sounds like she's crying and that makes me start crying.
"Were you too hurt so Damon had to change you?" It's Caroline speaking now, she too sounds melancholy.
I turn to face my friends, both girls pull me out of Damon's grasp and into their own. I'm bawling again. I don't really care that there are other people watching.
"No…it was my mother. She did it. She wants to make me suffer forever." The girls stiffen.
"Oh my God. She's disgusting. How could your own mom do that to you?" Caroline hugs tighter.
I turn when I feel a tap on my shoulder. Its Stefan, holding two blood bags for me. He looks pained…pained for me. And his sympathy makes me hug him too. I guess its just my overdrive emotions making me so mushy. He hugs me back.
"I'm so sorry we didn't find you sooner. I never would have wished this on you. You've become family. I'm so sick of this happening to the people we love." I pull away before I make him uncomfortable and take the bags from him.
I rip into one and drink greedily. It tastes good but not quite right. If it was warm it would be better. Not thinking I toss the first bag aside, Damon catches it midair. I forgot he's a neat freak. The second one goes down smoothly. I make sure to wipe the blood from my face. I don't feel quite like killing the humans in the room anymore.
"Well now that that's out of the way how about we celebrate my girlfriend being the living dead rather than dead dead!" I actually laugh probably too hard at Damons crazy comment. Everyone else joins in soon after.
Celebrating might keep my mind off of things. But even I can see the anger threatening to boil over in Damon's carefully placed cheerful façade. He's never going to let things end this way. My mother is in for hell. If it's up to me it will be by my hands that she suffers.