It had been two hours since Feliciano's doctor had visited him and he was now watching The View on the tiny television in the far left hand corner of the room. He did not really pay attention to what the middle-aged women were babbling about. He mainly just gawked at the grey ceiling while replaying the awful scene over and over again. He was so focused on what happened hours before that the television was just background noise. Feliciano then glanced at the pink flowers near his bed; he thought of Lovino. How is he handling this, Feliciano wondered. He just figured that Lovino just bottled it up with the rest of his feelings. Feliciano always told him to let his emotions show because he knew that it was unhealthy to hold everything in. But no matter how many times Feliciano told his brother, however, he never cared to listen. Even at their beloved grandfather's funeral, Lovino did not let one tear run down his face. He just stood there stiffly with his arm wrapped around his sobbing brother. Feliciano's glance then returned to the ceiling as he pondered about death. What if I died today, he thought, what would have happened? He then mulled over what it would feel like to die. Did it feel like when I was being choked back in the bathroom, Feliciano contemplated, like being so weak that you just give up? He then thought of Matthew, the boy with the Canadian sweatshirt. Did he understand what death was like? Probably not, Feliciano thought, but he sure does know what it feels like to be near death….just like me.

Suddenly, the door opened to Lovino standing in the doorway. Feliciano was startled out of his thoughts by the abrupt noise of the door opening. He noticed Lovino was holding a box of Godiva chocolates. They both stared at each other as silence filled the room once again. Lovino appeared to be surprised that his brother was awake. He then shut the door behind him and stood at the foot of Feliciano's bed. Feliciano knew from the look on his brother's face that Lovino wanted to bawl right in front of him. Instead, Lovino just stood there silent; Feliciano returned the quietness while fighting back tears. He never heard a silence quite this loud. Lovino drummed his fingers on the box of chocolates and averted his gaze. Feliciano shifted his eyes down to the white blankets that covered the lower half of his body. Then Lovino finally spoke, "So….I heard what happened."

Feliciano was beginning to become sick of that phrase. His eyes went back to his brother as he replied crossly, "Yeah, so have I."

Lovino was confused by his sweet brother responding so harshly, "Feli, are you alright?"

"Does it look like I'm fucking alright?"

"Um….no, no it doesn't."

Feliciano sighed, "I-I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scorn you like that, Fratello," he gestured his hand towards the nearby chair, "Have a seat."

Lovino then nervously sat in the chair and handed his brother the chocolates. Feliciano then put the candy next to the vase of flowers. His brother began to speak, "So…..um….I'm sorry that it had to happen to you."

"What makes me so special?"

"Um…I didn't mea-"

"Yes, I didn't deserve to be raped. But then again, no one does. So what makes me so fucking special?"

"Feli, I-"

"WHAT NOW?! ARE YOU GONNA FUCKING TELL ME I'M SPECIAL FOR BEING RAPED?! HUH?!"

Lovino then stood up from his chair and said unsympathetically, "I'm gonna go. You're fucking welcome for the chocolates." He then exited the room by slamming the door behind him.

Feliciano stared at the closed door as tears began to run down his tender face, "FRATELLO!" he sobbed loudly, "I DIDN'T MEAN IT! I-I didn't mean it….I d-didn't mean it….." Feliciano then clutched tightly onto his blanket and lowered his head. The hot streams fell similar to a young bird falling out of the nest to see if it can fly. But sadly, this juvenile bird did not take flight and had plummeted to his death. The blanket was stained by the tears as Feliciano wailed and cried. He then snatched the vase of flowers and threw it at the door. The vase smashed to smithereens and the sound that emanated from it was the scream Feliciano did not vocalize. Water, shattered glass, and flowers now surrounded the doorway to trap the next visitor. Feliciano then continued to snivel for the next few hours with few breaks in between.

After those ungodly hours had passed, it was now seven o'clock. The warm glow of the sun setting fell through the window behind Feliciano which elegantly covered his back and part of his bed with the warmth of orange and yellow pigments. A nurse that fed him lunch and dinner scolded him over the broken glass vase just an hour before. It was now being cleaned up by a custodian. After the janitor had left, Feliciano was alone once again.

After a couple more hours had passed, Feliciano was now watching Family Guy and was laughing at the shenanigans of Peter, Quagmire, Joe, and Cleveland. Then a male nurse opened the door and came in with a cart of medicines. "Feliciano Vargas?" the nurse asked kindly.

Feliciano averted his gaze from the television, "Yes?"

The nurse pushed the cart further into the room and next to his bed, "It's time for your medicine."

"Oh, okay."

"Okay, so your medicine is Zoloft, Trazodone, and Vicodin."

"Vicodin? I don't remember being told I was taking that."

The nurse handed him the medicine in small cup, "Well I was told before your doctor had left that at the last second she wanted to put you on a strong pain medication. I guess you didn't get the memo."

Feliciano took grasp of the tiny cup full of his medication, "Oh."

"But anyway," the nurse poured him a cup of ice water for him to drink and handed it to him, "there's your medicine."

Feliciano swallowed the medication with some difficulty; he was not used to swallowing pills. He then drank the water and handed the two cups back to the nurse. The nurse then pulled the cart backwards, turned off the lights in the room, and left while closing the door behind him. Feliciano then continued to watch Family Guy until eleven o'clock.

At eleven, Feliciano was beginning to feel exhausted. The medicine must be kicking in, he thought. He then turned off the television and finally had the strength to roll onto his left side. This time, he felt no pain when he moved. He then promptly fell asleep.

Feliciano had fallen onto the tiled floor and mustered up strength to pull himself up by grabbing the side of the nearby bathtub to slouch against the wall. The anonymous man turned around after he slammed the door to the bathroom shut; it was Ludwig.

"L-Ludwig?!" Feliciano was staggered.

"Guess what day it is, Feli" Ludwig replied hauntingly as he walked up slowly to Feliciano.

"Um…?"

"I said guess what day it is, boy."

"Um….I don't know."

"It's the day you get out of here, faggot."

Feliciano was frightened; Ludwig had never talked to him like that, "Lud-Ludwig?"

Ludwig dropped to his knees and unzipped his olive green trousers which revealed his hard shaft. He then yanked Feliciano down by his long, obscure curl so hard that it was pulled out of his hairline. Feliciano screamed in pain momentarily until Ludwig forced his mouth onto his penis. He then forced Feliciano to suck my pushing his head ferociously up and down his hard member. Feliciano choked on the large shaft as it went completely into his mouth.

The minutes that ticked away felt like an eternity to Feliciano. Ludwig moaned as he forcefully shoved Feliciano's head down harder and faster. Feliciano began to cry as blood began to trickle from his lips. The shaft had felt like sandpaper as it cut up his mouth. Then suddenly, Ludwig groaned loudly and a hot liquid filled Feliciano's oral cavity. Feliciano nearly choked on the salty, boiling hot semen as his cranium was released from Ludwig's harsh grasp. As Feliciano coughed up some of the ivory liquid, a large force shoved his head into the bathtub. Rapidly, Feliciano made impa-

Feliciano's eyes burst open and the feeling of anxiousness had overcome him. He then noticed he was covered in sweat and breathing heavily. Feliciano looked around and he observed the different surroundings. With his chest rapidly expanding and deflating, he realized that he had fallen out of bed.