Well, I'm back from a 10 day vacation! This chapter was meant to go out before it but I wasn't able to finish in time. Now that I'm back, here you go!

I'm sure many of you are wondering about how I plan to handle Ridley from here. You won't have to wait long... at all. Might be a bit underwhelming but I made no promises. And just one Mother Brain cameo today.

Published April 26, 2012

Reputation at Stake

"Kraid, I think we need to have a talk about respecting the dead." Ridley cracked his wing back into its socket, wincing as his body was finally put within operable parameters again. It was a good thing they had spare pieces of his Meta Ridley equipment in case he needed repairs; metal plating once again covered most of the dragon's body. "When people die, you don't swing them all over the place like a ragdoll. And yes, I was dead, not sleeping."

"It all worked out in the end," the lizard said, grinning goofily. "Thanks Jikky!"

"Except for the fact that Zebes is gone, everyone's dead, and I'll have so much paperwork that I wish was with them," Ridley muttered. He tried to itch his skull but found that the armour was stopping him.

"And I got this!" Kraid whipped out what looked like Crocomire's skull, holding it to Ridley as though he should be impressed.

Ridley hesitantly took the remnants, itch intensifying. "How did... That's... charming. Let's... let's just go home, okay? I have a lot to deal with." And why did the skull feel like it was depressed? "How long until we're back?"

"We shall return within the day, my captain!" Victum declared, saluting.

The space dragon leaned back in the makeshift captain's seat, formed out of mattresses the transport was delivering (why they had raided a federation mattress factory he would never fathom), and sighed. The amount of casualties was astronomical. A single bounty hunter killed off three long time SPC officials. It was outright humiliating!

He started punching at the itch, though to anyone watching it looked like their leader was hitting himself for no discernible reason. "We will need to retaliate for this. We can't be allowed to look so weak in their eyes, but this is not a decision to be made rashly. Our next move must be thoroughly calculated." And he stopped punching, the itch gone.

"I can do ma times tables!"

"Shut up Kraid."

"Okai, besty!"

"...I'm going to sleep now. Sub-General, don't wake me if I stop breathing."

-Across the universe-

"Sir, we've found all these DNA samples on Aran's equipment. We've identified most of them, but-"

"Clone them all."

"All? With all due respect, we don't even know what half of these are! What if this is Kraid? You've read Aran's reports; we don't want one of those."

"Clone them all. Euthanize any that look like Kraid."

-With the pirates-

It had been two weeks since the destruction of Zebes. While most of the day to day actions of the confederation had returned to the status quo, there were still issues to be resolved. Samus alone had caused a large amount of strife to the pirates, beating them time and time again. Their most recent loss had been the most devastating yet. After a fortnight of pondering, it was time for a meeting between the High Commanders.

Ridley took his place among the leaders of their people, looking down at all the physically weaker yet socially equal pirates around him. Most of them were regular space pirates with a higher intellect, others were much stronger on a physical level yet just as smart, and there were some that weren't even of the same race, just like the space dragon.

"We lack a General, a Commander and a High Commander thanks to the disastrous Zebesian Rebuild Operation," High Commander Fraptos said, opening the meeting. He was a giant purple slug with what looked like six googly eyes, but he was probably the most influential of them all. "General Phantoon, Commander Crocomire and High Commander Draygon were all irreplaceable members of our people, but their positions must be filled. I trust you all have been thinking about such things these last weeks."

"I recommend Phantoon's Sub-General to take his position," another High Commander said. "He proved himself exceptional on the ill-fated Nuking of Andromeda expedition."

They had a vote, and Victum was promoted.

"As High Commander, I recommend Commander Fondu. His plans of cheese based warfare were pivotal to the success of Operation: Punch Out Cthulu."

"I counter with Head Scientist Jikarvl," Ridley said. "Thanks to him, we've managed to make successes out of operations that otherwise had no benefits to us."

They voted, and Fondu became a High Commander.

"I still can't believe we sent a fleet just to punch Cthulu," the dragon muttered. "In that case, I nominate that General Grievous become out lacking Commander."

"I counter with General Kraid," Fraptos said, receiving stares of disbelief from everyone in the room.

Ridley stared at the slug, eyelid twitching like it had never twitched before. A spark shot out from his head. "You... want to promote Kraid?"

"No, I just wanted to see your reactions if I said his name. All in favour of Grievous?"

"I almost had a heart attack you ass."

"You're fine."

-In the lower levels-

The monitor flared to life, displayed a series of statistics before the AI took over. "GALVE, MONDOWOPPA?"

Jikarvl input a few commands, giving Mother Brain access to the rest of the facility. "I'm sorry about the body, but we never built it expecting to take an attack that powerful. You saw the readings, nothing could have protected you from that."

"WONDOWA, PRAM KA. HAG KRAID?"

"No, he doesn't know where you are."

Kraid burst into the room, Chykka in tow. "Hai guys! I'm so glad you're all right, mom! Ridley told me you blew up and you were gone and I should never try to look for you again, but then Phillip smelt blueberries and we found you!"

Chykka chimed in with a delighted purr.

"Why do we do a worse job hiding you with every attempt?" Jikarvl muttered.

"MIDA...? BALLACU VODD!"

"Naw, I think you're the greatest mom ever! I don't even compare."

"PWOI..."

"That's what I thought too, but it all worked out in the end!"

"GALVE BWANNA...?"

-High Command-

"And now, we must prove ourselves to the GF once again," Fraptos said. "Who wants to blow up what this time?"

"I've received reports about a Metroid cloning operation from our spies," another High Commander said. "That might not be all they're messing with, but it's all he could get."

The slug nodded, eyes whirling as though part of a game of Boggle gone horribly wrong. "Perfect. They kill our Metroid clones, so we kill theirs."

"There also appears to be some sort of operation where they are attempting to clone the long-extinct June bug and house them in some sort of orbital sanctuary until they are mature enough to release into the ecosystem."

A Zebesian High Commander laughed madly, rubbing his claws together. "Even better! We must make plans to annihilate this June bug sanctuary at once. I will take ten thousand of our most skilled troops and raid this colony within the week."

"High Commander Smitty, I think we need some priorities," Ridley sighed. "We need to focus on the Metroids."

"Nonsense! Do you know how devastated Earth was after the June bugs went extinct? It was catastrophic! We must not allow them to recover at any costs!"

"Ah fuck it. You take the pirates and squish as many beetles as you want. I'm going after the Metroids."

The meeting was adjourned shortly after and Ridley went straight into battle strategies. He would need extensive plans and that other High Commander's research information if this operation was to be a success. No pirate could rush into a federation outpost without making sure that every possibility was accounted for.

But, being Meta Ridley, he could just storm the place. So he went to his favourite bar.

Chugging down a drink, Ridley just sighed. "Sometimes I wonder... Every time I fight that hunter, I fail. Every time I don't fight that hunter, I succeed. Fighting her, going out of my way to get petty revenge just kills me again and again. I should just give up, but-"

"Commander, you've had one glass and you're already talking to that skull," the bartender said.

Ridley glared, placing a claw on Crocomire's skull. "I know that. He's one of the only intelligent people left, and he's dead. This says something."

"Most people tell the bartender their troubles."

"Well I don't like you." Ridley returned his attention to the skull. "Where was I? Right, giving up on my revenge... Samus is... over my head. Maybe, instead of trying to kill her, I should hurt everyone around her. Yes, this has worked much better in the past! I killed her parents, it took how many years for her to get me back? I kill her friends, and the only reason I got killed was because I waited for her to come and shoot me in the mouth. I think I'm making a lot of ground on how to solve this issue... Now what else can I do with my life?"

-Two minutes later-

"Okay, Crocomire, here's how I'm going to kill her this time: follow her gunship back to where she lives, and once she's gone kill everyone. Leave a trail of entrails back to a volcano, and when she comes I'll be sitting behind her, completely invisible. Pick her up, snap her arms, and throw her in the lava. Just to make sure she doesn't find some way to get out, I'll keep blasting her all the way down. Wait, even better, I'll plant charges everywhere within a kilometre and obliterate everything after she's gone. Or, I'll just blow the entire planet to hell! This is going to be glorious!" He slipped into a hazy laughter, swirling around a glass of ninety percent alcohol.

Something rubbed up against his side. A quick glance revealed that it was Chykka, his master nowhere to be seen. "Did you slip away from the idiot?"

The Aetherian insect buzzed, slapping the counter to order his own drink.

"You actually seem smarter than Kraid, but since that's not saying much: you're pretty smart." Gears turned in the space dragon's head. Chykka was smart, capable, and from what he had seen in Kraid's hugs had a collapsible skeleton. He couldn't talk back either. "How would you like to go on a mission with me?"

Chykka sucked up the pirate booze, eying him with suspicion.

"You get to kill things."

The bug turned to him, purring happily.

"I knew we'd reach an agreement."

"RIDLEY!" Kraid was suddenly behind him. "Are you going on an adventure again?"

"Yes."

"Can I come?"

"No."

"C'mon, pleeeaaase?"

"No."

"But Phillip's going, and I'm his bud!"

"Yes he is and yes you are."

"So can I come?"

"No. Wait a minute, I'm trying to aimlessly destroy everything. Yes, you may come, but listen to my orders or we're not friends anymore. Can you do this?"

"Yay!"

"That's not an answer."

"I need to tell Phillip!" He turned to Chykka. "I'm going with Ridley!"

Chykka just purred.

"I feel like I just made a horrible mistake," Ridley muttered, going down on his next drink.