Hello!

I feel so good being back on track with my writing, I feel like this is going somewhere good. I am really happy with the responses I got from my last leading-chapter, I think it was what I expected but I'm happy it's turned out well. I'm not sure if I got 10 reviews, but I really wanted to update for you anyway. So here it is.

Impulses, Chapter 11: Needs

Clary was shaking violently in her husband's capable arms trying to get the image out of her head. The all too familiar lines of her mother's face streaked with blood, her eyes staring up into the sky like glass disks, unmoving with little life in them besides the small glint of emerald still shining. Her mother's hair was a mattered mess but Clary couldn't care less, she just wanted her safe.

As soon as Luke had arrived he'd called his pack and they'd lifted Jocelyn on their shoulders, carrying her to Magnus' where he promised he would do all he could. Jace was hugging Clary on the sofa out in the front Living room of the sparkly warlock's apartment.

"Shhhh baby, shhh" Jace whispered soothingly into her ear pulling her hair behind her ear so he could stroke her check lovingly but Clary couldn't calm. Her breathing was slowly getting faster like she was about to hyperventilate as she recalled the images of her limp mother lying in a pool of blood. Jace was hugging her tightly against him trying to comfort her but it seemed little was working.

She wasn't even crying, she was just letting out small high pitched wails of utter grief, her face hidden in Jace's chest. Her breath heavy and quick.

-Impulses-

Jace hated to see her like this, heck he'd never seen her like this and it was driving him insane knowing he couldn't calm her down. She just hid in his chest in complete disbelief and overall heartache. Out of all the days, it was their wedding night and look at her. His wife was an utter mess and he couldn't do anything, there was no way she could handle being in the same room with Jocelyn, or anyone with her blood on them at all, it would send her into complete hysteria which he had only just managed to coax her out of.

There was definitely something odd about what was going on and he intended to find out what it was, nobody hurts his family like this, ever. And he didn't just mean Clary, Jocelyn was his family to now, well she always had been, she was Clary's mother and if Jace loved the short little red head then he loved her mother. That was just the way it was, nothing more to it.

Alec opened the door to one of Magnus' bedrooms which held the frail and injured Jocelyn as well as Magnus, Maryse and Luke. Jace caught a glimpse inside the room for a split second through the opening in the white wooden door. Jocelyn was lying on a soft single bed with Magnus leaning over her with a solemn expression planted on his face, Jace could see Jocelyn's blood soaking into the sheets but it seemed Magnus didn't care. Anyway, it wasn't like he couldn't just snap his fingers and have them clean, or even demand new ones.

Luke was gripping his wife's hand tightly, the skin over her knuckles white only just tightly stretching over the bone. It wasn't a sight Jace wanted to see but he would rather make sure he saw it than Clary; it would cause her to leap out of control in a matter of seconds. Alec closed the door behind him blocking Jace's view of the room not to his disappointment.

"Hey man" Alec came over to sit on the coffee table staring at Clary in Jace's arm, Jace could only imagine how vulnerable she must look to him right now.

"How is-" Jace asked but when he heard a whimper from Clary cut himself off quickly and turned his neck towards her disappearing amongst her curls to whisper into her ear.

"Baby, it's okay… She'll be fine, I won't let anything happen… I promise baby, sssh"

Jace looked up at Alec again after attempting to comfort Clary and saw Alec shake his head slightly with a grave expression. Alec got up quietly and left the apartment, leaving a note for Magnus on a small hall cabinet.

Jace wasn't sure what he was going to tell Clary, he just didn't know anymore.

-Impulses-

It had been two days since Clary's wedding night, her mother wasn't doing any better and she just felt like completely giving up one everything, she didn't know what to do anymore. She needed Jace so much but she couldn't have him 24/7 to stop her moping, she didn't want that for him.

Magnus had moved Jocelyn to Luke's house so Clary moved out to live with Jace in this Institute; they were going to make the move anyway, now they just had extra incentive. She had done up Jace's room a bit, painted a feature wall behind his bed the colour of the ocean. She'd pinned up artworks and pictures of them together on the walls and even bought a small grey rug for the floor which she always layed down on to draw.

Jace didn't mind, but she didn't want to take his room away from him so let him keep his neat white bedspread and monk styled piled clothes in his drawers. If it meant he was comfortable and she was comfortable, then it was good. All she wanted was for her mother to be okay, she was sick with worry and couldn't take her mind off the situation, it was driving her mad. Of course, she was trying to be positive but it was the easiest thing the world when her mother was unconscious and nobody knew if she would live.

A though struck Clary as soon as she walked towards the door, she need a distraction. And she knew exactly where to get it.

Jace.

-Impulses-

Clary had found Jace in the training, room but it didn't take long for him to get the hint and rush to the nearest room. As soon as he closed the door he wrapped his arms around his wife's waist, pulling her into him kissing neck passionately, pulling lightly on the sensitive skin, his tongue drawing light circles make her shiver and moan quietly. She locked her arms around his waist in return and leant her head back giving Jace more access to her neck. He was kissing her so passionately it was driving her insane. He slowly moved her back to fetch up against a wall, his arms untangling themselves from her waist and reaching under her thighs to push her arm.

Clary wrapped her legs around Jace's waist, her hands finding their way to his hair as Jace moved slowly towards her lips. He was tantalisingly close it was all but killing her, he slowly kissed down her jaw paying special attention to the skin under her chin. All she wanted was Jace, this was exactly what she needed, a few moments with just her and Jace to take her mind of the situation. Of course it would have seemed like she was being selfish and cared little about her mother but it all honesty it was completely the opposite.

She cared so much it was draining her, she couldn't do anything but think about her mum so now, she really needed the life breathed back into her, and Jace was the only one who could do this for her.

His tongue only just meeting up upper lip when he pushed his body closer against Clary, crushing her under him. She moaned loudly exciting Jace.

"Moan my name" he whispered into her ear before releasing his hand from under Clary's curvy thighs and trailing up her body to her hair. He pushed her up further and kissed just below her neck whilst Clary murmured Jace's name. Everything she needed was up against her… and she loved it.

There was nothing but Jace, he was everywhere. She could feel him, see him, smell him, taste him… it was like he was all that existed for her. Jace finally locked his lips passionately with Clary's their lips moving at a fast rate as Jace pressed his body harder and harder against Clary who had her hands in Jcae's hair, her favourite spot.

"Jace…" Clary whimpered slightly against his mouth but Jace knew it wasn't from pain or worry so he didn't stop. It wasn't long before Clary had her top off and Jace was in the midst of taking his off, and before long they found themselves tangled together on the bed.

-Impulses-

Clary woke up at around lunch time after a short nap with Jace's arms locking her in his grasp. He was breathing so peacefully; Clary had managed to put her underwear back on before snuggling up to her husband, as did Jace but she soon let her stress and exhaustion take over.

As soon as she woke up however she remember her mother… was she shallow? Was she a horrible daughter? Was she a horrible wife? Using Jace to escape her fears? Surely Jace knew her intentions but what if he didn't? Did that make her a slut?

She didn't even want to think about it, the fact that she had used Jace to forget about her mother for a few short hours, before she was sure it was the right thing… now her perception of what she had chosen seemed wrong to her. She shuddered violently at the though, waking Jace. She turned in his arms knowing he was awake now and stared into his honey gold eyes filled with desire and love for her.

"Hello" he whispered quietly smiling at Clary, his smile made her heart flutter like a small bird every time she saw him smile, well every time she was him at all.

"Hey" Clary whispered back, nuzzling her head against his shoulder looking for some form of comfort. She felt so empty and hollow at what she'd done and had decided that she was wrong. She shouldn't have looked for a distraction through Jace, it was as bad as using his body only for her needs (if you could even call it that), not caring about his feelings or desires. She felt horrid and couldn't even face him, knowing the choices she had made.

Whilst her mother laid in a bed suffering and in pain from an anonymous attack, she decided to forget about her mother and go and do whatever the hell she wanted to run away from her anxiety. She knew that it took a heck of a lot of strength to face up to someone's terrors, fears and worries, but instead Clary had coward away from them using the one she loves most as something close to a 'toy' to occupy her mind.

"You look deep in thought" Clary could only just hear, her flaming curls covering her ears. She pulled back slightly to look into Jace's beautiful eyes, what she would give to have eyes like his, that someone could stare into for hours and hours.

She decided, she had to tell Jace her intentions, they were husband and wife after all right? Right? Angel even she didn't know if that justified anything, she was a hopeless case.

"Jace… I'm so- so-" Clary burst into tears instantly as soon as her mouth tried to form the words but they couldn't. Jace's face was painted with worry as he drew her into him murmuring into her ear.

"Baby, is it you're mum? It's okay I'm here baby, I'm here" He rubbed his arms up against Clary's back soothing her slightly. She pulled back to look at him.

"I'm sorry Jace…" she felt new tears stain her already wet cheeks but she had to do this, she was such a mess.

"Clary what on earth?" Jace started but was abruptly cut off.

"I used you" Clary murmured in a small, fragile voice that sounded as if it could break with the slightest touch, like shattered glass.

"Clary you didn't-"

"Jace, I need to get my-my m-mind of everything, I couldn't h-handle it-t anym-m-more… so I-I looked f-for a distrac-ction…" Clary had to tear her eyes away from his face because she knew he would be frowning at her.

But he wasn't, he was smiling slightly, that arrogant smile that she seemed to have an ongoing love-hate relationship with.

"Who wouldn't?" He asked in an ignorant tone, but then turned serious. "Clary, I knew what was happening when it happened; I knew what was going on. If I didn't like it or felt uncomfortable then I wouldn't have done it… I'm a big boy Clary you would know…"

"Jace!" Clary punched him in the arm softly but smiled a bit.

"Baby, it's okay, everything with your mum and stuff is taking its toll. It isn't a bad thing to need to be distracted that is not something to be ashamed of. I would have wanted the same thing, and who else were you going to turn to? Angel I hope no one else! Plus, we have hardly had any alone time lately, I mean our reception was cut short and there is no way I am taking you to the honeymoon like this!" Jace was hugging Clary tightly, and she wondered if he actually knew how much better she felt… wait a second.

"Honeymoon?" She asked quietly.

"You didn't think I'd forget about a honeymoon did you?" He asked faking hurt but laughing quietly at her.

"Of course not… I just…"

"We can sort it out later baby, for now, let's get some lunch. I'm starved. Taki's?" Jace asked.

"Taki's" Clary replied smiling broadly up at Jace, so maybe she wasn't a slut after all… she hoped not.

I have no idea how many reviews I got, I just really wanted to upload because the reviews I got really made me smile and be happy about my story, it's going somewhere good I know it

Hopefully you liked this chapter, Clary was a tiny bit bipolar but I think it fits considering her circumstances and all, you know reception ruined by her mother almost dying, her feeling like a slut blah blah you get it.

Now please give me ideas… some of the best chapters in my opinion were formulated through ideas from reviews that you readers gave me so please send in the love and ideas with that little yellow box below marked 'review'… I'll love ya forever.

Xx

Green-doves.