Marinette let out a sign as she looked on the calendar that was hanging on the pink wall in her tiny apartment. Ever since she was little she loved the color pink and she couldn't help but stick to the color once she moved out, However the color was a lot more subtle than it was in her old room. Most walls were just plain white but some of the walls were painted pink to give the apartment some more character.
"Is everything alright Marinette?" Tikki asked as she flew over to her holder.
"It's almost Christmas…" She sighed again.
"Don't you always look forward to Christmas?"
"I did, but not anymore."
Marinette gave one more glance at the calendar before she walked towards her open Kitchen to make some hot chocolate. she took two cups from the kitchen cabinet, one of the cups was just the normal mug size while the other one was a cup a kids tea party set. She had bought it for Tikki so she was able to get to use tableware that was more of her own size. Marinette thought it was quite ironic that the tea party set was white butterfly themed since Tikki gave her the power to purify the Akuma's, So she just had to buy it for that reason.
Tikki had followed her towards the kitchen and helped Marinette with putting the chocolate powder into the cups once Marinette had poured the heated milk in the cups. Of course Tikki put quite a lot of chocolate powder into her own cup, she had a sweet tooth after all.
Marinette had taken both cups in her hands before she walked towards her white couch that was decorated with different shades of pink colored pillows. She placed the cups onto the coffee table that was in front of it before she took a seat.
"You do realize that Alya won't live it down if you don't come to her Christmas party?" Tikki said as she landed on the coffee table behind her cup of hot chocolate.
"I know… she is my best friend but I really don't want to go…" She said as she took her own cup from the coffee table and blew at the hot liquid before taking a tiny sip.
"It's because Adrien would be there, isn't it?"
Marinette looked away when Adrien got mentioned. Last Christmas was a mess, a mess she would like to delete from her memories. Sadly she couldn't do and she knew that seeing Adrien after a whole year that those emotions could comeback. The past year she had moved on, or at least that's what she told herself, but due to the fact she just avoided Adrien she had no idea she had really moved on or not.
"You know it's alright if you still haven't moved on completely." Tikki said.
"It is not alright Tikki… It's been a year, I should have moved on."
"But you have been crushing on him for five years before you decided to confess on Christmas Eve."
"This was the most stupid thing I did. Resulting me to be in tears and drinking a whole bottle of Maury wine before I threw up and pass out in the bathroom."
Tikki stayed quiet for a moment when she remembered the moment Marinette had passed out and she couldn't really do anything. Marinette didn't have her phone with her when that happened so she couldn't dial Alya's number to make her worried because Marinette didn't say a thing. Instead she decided to make some noise, pushing the shampoo bottles from the shelf in hope the others would hear it in the living room.
They had heard the loud noise and rushed towards the closed door. Tikki heard Alya calling out her friends name and asked her if she was okay, but the panic soon reached her voice once she didn't get any answers. Nino was the one who had opened the door by force and had carried Marinette to Alya's bedroom after Alya had washed her face with a wet cloth. They soon concluded she just passed out because of the fact she tired herself out by the crying she did, so it wasn't something very life-threatening. But still to Marinette that night was the most embarrassed night in her life.
"Marinette, it won't be that bad this year." Tikki said as she took a sip of her hot chocolate.
"How would you know that? What if something similar happens?" Marinette asked "I don't want to go through a night like that again... It's embarrassing and I worried everyone…"
"You shouldn't dwell on the past too much. What happens happened, you can't change it… but you can learn from it."
"Thanks Tikki." She said and smiled softly at her kwami.
The days few days until the party had passed in the meantime Marinette most likely thought about what Tikki had said. Marinette knew that Tikki had a point. What was done is done. Nothing can be changed what's in the past. Maybe she should just go… running away from her problems and embarrassment isn't going to help her. It would probably make it worse. Maybe this Christmas would be better?
Marinette's phone went of the moment she was getting ready for the party. She had followed Tikki's advice and made herself look pretty so she would feel pretty and feel more confident. Marinette placed the makeup pallet down on her beauty desk before she picked up the phone. It was Alya.
"Hi girl!" Alya greeted her. "I just wanted to check on you if you're still coming."
"Hi." Marinette greeted back. "I don't really feel like it, but I'm still going…"
"It's Adrien right? I'm sorry that I have to invite him as well… He is Nino's best friend so I can't really close him out…"
"It's okay. I just need to face my problems… I guess?"
She wasn't so sure anymore now the time was really getting near. In less than an hour she would be facing Adrien again.
"Hey it's okay. You can take the time you need to face him." Alya said as she had noticed Marinette's doubt. "You can come a bit later, when everyone's already there. I invited more people over this year. It's not only you, Nino, Adrien, Kagami, Luka and I. I invited Rose, Juleka, Mylène, Ivan, Nathaniel, Marc, Alix, Kim, Ondine, Max and even Sabrina."
"Thanks Alya, you're the best. But I will be arriving on time. If I'm the last one they all will look at me when I get in."
"Okay girl, do whatever you like-." Alya got cut off by something crashing in the background. "I'm sorry I got to go now. Nino just dropped some of the food for the party. See you in an hour."
"See you in an hour." Marinette repeated.
With that Alya ended the call. Marinette let out a sigh. She was glad Alya made sure there were more friends over this time. It would make it easier to avoid Adrien if she wasn't ready to face him just yet. Of course she was going to try, but it has been a year since she talked to him for the last time.
She looked at herself into the Mirror, she wore a dark red sleeveless Qipao dress that stopped right above her knees. The dress had silver rhinestones that were put in a beautiful pattern of flowers by her waist. She had put her hair up in a bun on top of her head and wore two silver bracelets around her left wrist. Her eyelids were covered with a natural brown colors and an on point winged eyeliner. She had added a bit of glitter by her eyes as well. Now all that was left for her to do was applying her deep red lipstick.
"Tikki, we're going." Marinette announced as she walked into the living room after she had put her lipstick on.
Tikki was there munching on some Christmas cookies Marinette had baked yesterday. She walked towards the bowl with Christmas cookies and put a few in her small shoulder bag for Tikki.
"You look really pretty Marinette." Tikki complimented as she followed her holder to the front door.
"Thank you Tikki. I feel a bit better now I've put effort in how I look." Marinette said as she put on her black heels.
Tikki giggled happily, she was glad she was able to help her holder feel better in some way. She flew into Marinette's bag once Marinette had put on her heels and coat. She took her keys and then left the house.
She got at Alya's apartment after a fifteen minute walk. Her nose had become red of the cold, making her wish she hadn't forgotten her scarf. Fortunately for her the apartment building wasn't as cold as the cold December air outside and so she could warm up a little as she waited for the elevator. A ding could be heard before the door opened; she stepped inside it and pressed the button for the sixth floor.
The elevator had sent her up to the right floor and before she knew it she stood in front of Alya's front door, which was decorated with a Christmas wreath that had a small Ladybug and Chat Noir sitting between the branches of the wreath. Marinette could feel her nerves come up. Once she enters, she will see him again. She took a deep breath before she reached out to press the button of the doorbell.
She didn't have to wait that long before the door opened and she got greeted by Alya. Her friend looked beautifully as she wore an orange halter dress. Marinette took of her coat and hung it onto the coat rack.
"Oh. My. Gosh. Girl you look so beautiful!" Alya exclaimed once she saw Marinette's complete outfit. "I totally need to make a picture of you."
"Thank you." Marinette said a bit shyly. Alya could always get so overly excited about things.
Marinette walked over to the living room as Alya had already speed walked away to get her photo camera. Once she got into the room she saw that a handful of friends had already arrived. Luka and Nino were talking about music on the couch; Luka wore a limited edition Jagged Stone ugly Christmas sweater and black skinny jeans. Nino was completely in contrast of him as he was wearing a dress shirt, neat pants and a bow tie. Nathaniel was sitting near the Christmas tree sketching in his sketchbook, he wearing a dark red dress shirt with his purple pants. Juleka was talking with Rose while both of them held a glass with white wine, Juleka was wearing a long sleeved black dress with lace that came down to her ankles and Rose was wearing a soft pink colored dress that came to just above her knees that was decorated with a pattern of hot pink Christmas candy canes. Marinette was glad that she wasn't the only one that had put on a pretty dress.
"Marinette, can you stand next to the Christmas tree?" Alya asked as she showed her that she had her photo camera by hand.
Marinette nodded and took place next to the Christmas tree that was just like the Christmas wreath Ladybug and Chat Noir themed. She smiled at the camera right before Alya pressed the button and took the picture. After the picture was taken Marinette joined Juleka and Rose with a glass of wine.
As time passed, more people arrived. Mylène and Ivan got in ten minutes after Marinette. They wore matching ugly sweaters and simple jeans. Alya took a picture of the couple by the Christmas tree just like how she did with Marinette, so she assumed that her best friend had taken a picture of everyone. Just some minutes after Ivan and Mylène, Alix, Kim, Ondine and Max joined. Alix, Max and Kim were in neat pants and a dress shirts combined with ugly Christmas ties, Ondine however wore a dark green strapless mermaid dress that matched the color of Kim's ugly Christmas tie. Alya made a picture of the group of friends as well. Marc, Kagami and Sabrina arrived some time later. Marc wore a dark green dress shirt with black skinny jeans, Kagami wore a black pencil dress with a white cardigan on top of it and Sabina wore a purple strapless dress. Again Alya took a picture.
The room had already been crowded as almost everyone had arrived; the only one who had to arrive was Adrien. Marinette was happy he hadn't arrived just yet, however when the doorbell rang a half hour later after Marc, Kagami and Sabrina arrived she knew that that would be Adrien outside the apartment. Alya had walked to the door to greet the last guest to join. Marinette kept silent waiting for Adrien to walk into the living room.
"Oh. My. Gosh." Alya's voice could be heard from the corridor between her laughs. "You look horrible. I mean that suit is so wrong."
Adrien's laughter joined Alya's however Marinette couldn't hear what he was saying. She had frozen completely as she now had to avoid him for the whole night. She hid behind Juleka when she saw Alya coming back in followed by the blond.
"Dude, what are you wearing?" Nino chuckled.
"I had a photo shoot that just finished ten minutes ago for my father's ugly Christmas suits and I figured that this suit would be good for the occasion." Adrien said as he laughed as well
Marinette looked at Adrien from behind Juleka. He was wearing a bright blue suit that had a pattern of snowmen, snowflakes and presents all over the fabric of the suit. She now understood why Alya was laughing so hard, the suit was hideous.
Marinette could feel her heart speed up and butterflies flutter through her stomach. Why did he even look handsome in such an ugly Christmas suit? She hid behind Juleka again hoping Adrien hadn't seen her.
Unfortunately her ladybug luck wasn't with her tonight. Adrien had spotted her right away and walked over to talk to her. However Marinette quickly excused herself and walked away before Adrien could even start a conversation. The whole night went like that; Marinette kept making excuses to avoid Adrien. She avoided him so much that even the others began to notice.
"I know you don't want anything to do with Adrien tonight, but can you at least try to act normal around him? The poor guy has been trying to talk with you all night long but you keep running away." Alya said. She had taken Marinette by her wrist and pulled her with her towards the kitchen.
"I can't do that Alya. I'm still not over him and I don't want to fall back to being deeply in love with him. The butterflies that came back to life is already bad enough, I don't want it to become worse than that." She said as she looked down at the floor.
"I know it's hard, but it's pretty obvious you're avoiding him, everyone will think its weird behavior you're showing since you used to have a huge crush on him. They will eventually ask questions about it, and I don't think that is something you would want to happen."
Marinette shook her head. If there was something she didn't wanted to happen it was that she had to explain that the reason of her avoiding Adrien was because she had given her heart to Adrien on Christmas Eve and that he had rejected her. Which resulted her in being emotionally drunk towards Adrien, asking him why he didn't loved her. Alya trying to get her put in her bed to sleep off the drunkenness, which Marinette protested to in a way a six year old would do when they didn't get something they wanted. Once she was finally in Alya's bed she got sick and rushed towards the toilet only to throw up and pass out on the cold ground.
"Just give me a moment on my own… I will get back later and hopefully I'm able to act normally around him." Marinette said after a while.
"That's alright girl. It will be fine." Alya said and placed a hand on her shoulder. "You're strong you know that? You'll be able to get through it."
"Thanks Alya."
Both girls got back into the living room. Alya got over to her guests to check if everyone was still enjoying themselves, while Marinette walked towards the balcony door. She was so in her own thoughts that she walked passed Adrien who was once again trying to talk to Marinette.
The past year had been tough for him. He always had thought that Ladybug was the love of his life. He was convinced that she was the only one who could have his heart. That was why he rejected Marinette last Christmas. It hurt him to see Marinette break down in front of him when he told her he liked someone else; it hurt him to see Marinette getting emotionally drunk. Her desperate cries of why he couldn't love her still haunted him and seeing her down like this worried him like crazy. He was afraid she would get to the Alcohol again. Seeing her passed out on the floor once was already one time too many.
However as the year passed by he came to realize that it wasn't Ladybug who has his heart, it was Marinette. Her absence in his life and all the excuses to avoid him was enough to make him realize that, after all you'll realize how much someone means to you once that person isn't there for you anymore. Tonight he had hoped it went well and that he was able to talk to Marinette. That maybe they could still get together, but that was just stupidly wishful thinking.
He looked at her through the windows of the balcony door. She was leaning on the railing staring at probably nothing in particular and probably not caring that she would get sick if she continues to stand outside when it was less than -3 degrees Celsius.
He wanted to cheer her up, be he knew he couldn't do that as Adrien. So he slipped away from the crowded room and walked towards the Alya's work room. He had been here before and knew that the room she used to work at on the Ladyblog had a big window he could easily use to get out without anyone seeing him. Once he got into the room he transformed into Chat Noir, he knew it was risky to transform in Alya's apartment but had no other choice. He opened the window before he climbed out of the room and onto the roof.
Marinette was shivering as the cold wind hit her skin. She really should had put on her jacket first before she got outside, but she couldn't get back in to get it now. Tears had fallen down her cheeks as she sniffed softly in the quiet night. She should just had called in sick this night, the only thing she had to deal with then was a nagging kwami that told her she shouldn't run away from her problems, not some heartache because of some guy that doesn't even like her like that. Maybe she should just go home, there was no way she would even be able to enjoy the rest of the night when a handsome blond was walking around in the most hideous Christmas suit she had ever seen.
"A princess shouldn't be out here on her own while the others are having fun inside." She heard to oh so familiar voice of her partner Chat Noir.
"I guess I'm not a princess then kitty." She said letting out a sad laugh.
She didn't even mind to try to hide her sadness from the hero. He was her partner and she trusted him with her life. Maybe he would be able to cheer her up, or just having him near her was already good enough. He understood her feelings after all. Chat Noir landed next to her after he noticed she had been crying. He looked at her with concern.
"Are you alright?" He asked
"I've been better…" She said and let out a sigh. "If I'm completely honest I didn't want to go in the first place but my friend talked me into it…"
"Why don't you want to go? To me it seems to be pretty fun."
Marinette followed Chat Noir's gaze as he looked inside through the window. Everyone was still there, talking, laughing, eating and drinking together.
"Last Christmas was pretty much an embarrassing mess…" She said as she looked back at the Parisian skyline. "I can tell you what happened but you have to promise not to laugh okay?"
"I promise."
Marinette took a deep breath. She trusted Chat Noir and maybe it would be helpful to talk about the situation with someone who isn't involved with it.
"You see there's this boy I like a lot, He is one of my friends by the way, I confessed to him last year. Unfortunately he didn't felt the same way and rejected me… I wish he was just an ass while doing so, than at least I had a reason to dislike him. Instead he was very kind and explained to me he already liked someone else and that he was sorry he couldn't return my feelings because of that." Marinette said and paused for a moment. "I was so sure of myself that he felt the same way, that the fact he didn't hit me pretty hard. I ended up in tears and got my hands on the alcohol. My best friend tried to get the wine away from me but without much success. I was able to drink a whole bottle, causing me to get pretty drunk… After that I don't remember much but I got told I was crying hysterically, that I cried out to my crush why he couldn't love me. I was such a mess, being emotionally drunk and acting like a kid as my best friend tried to put me to bed. Eventually I ended up passed out in the bathroom, worrying everyone and ruining the night. It was so embarrassing…"
Chat Noir looked at her with a soft smile on his face, he felt flattered that Marinette trusted him enough to tell him her side of the story. Hopefully it would also give some more information on why she was behaving the way she does around his civilian self.
"I just felt so embarrassed to face him again, that I started to avoid him as much as I can. This was a success until tonight. I haven't seen him for a year and I really thought I had moved on from him, but the moment I saw him rocking that ugly Christmas suit… it all came back…" she sniffed as fresh tears threatened to fall down again. "I don't want to fall back in love again… I don't want to be rejected again…"
"Maybe he had changed his mind?" Chat Noir asked as he wrapped his arm around her shoulder pulling her closer to him.
"I doubt that… we haven't seen or spoken each other for a year…" she said as she slowly wrapped her arms around Chat Noir's waist in a side hug. "And even if he did… it wouldn't matter, I'm not falling for him again."
Chat Noir could feel his heart speed up and sunk at the same time. It speed up because of the sudden hug, it sunk because she didn't want to give his civilian self a second chance.
"Maybe you'll be able to find someone else special soon..." He said
"Maybe I've already found that someone…" she said as she snuggled closer.
Because of Adrien she hadn't seen Chat Noir in that way, while he was the person she trusted the most. Maybe she should have given him a chance way sooner, maybe then she didn't had to experience such a mess of a Christmas a year ago.
"And who may that special person be?" Chat asked playfully, his heart beating fastly as he hoped that she would reply with that he was that special someone.
"What would you do if I told you if you would be that special someone?" she asked softly as she looked up at him.
She tried to read his expression, tried to look for anything that could give her a sign that she won't go back down the same road she did the year before. She blushed slightly as he pulled her into a hug, pressing her back against the railing of the balcony. He leaned in towards her ear before he said softly.
"I would gladly be that special someone… because… I like you Marinette. I've liked you for a while..."
Marinette blushed even more as she quickly hid her face into Chat Noir's chest. Her heart was beating at the speed of light. He liked her, he liked her. Chat Noir chuckled at Marinette's reaction before he placed a kiss on top of her head.
"You look beautiful tonight." He complimented her. Marinette looked up and smiled at him.
"You too." She said, causing Chat Noir to chuckle.
She knew that it wouldn't work with Adrien, he saw her as just a very good friend anyways. So there isn't much hope left for the future. So maybe that giving Chat Noir a chance would lead to good things? Of course she wouldn't be sure for 100% but she was willing to take the risk and give Chat Noir the chance to have her heart.