AN: So, here's my little fill in for the first Christmas after Kurt's mom died that Burt mentions. Hope you enjoy!
Prompt: Velma Kelly-"You need to learn to put things behind you." - 'Chicago'
As the program I had been watching came to an end, I flipped the TV off. Like I did most nights, I planned on checking on Kurt one last time and then heading to bed myself. I had never been one to go to bed early but here lately staying up to even nine o'clock was a stretch.
I turned off the lights downstairs and headed upstairs. Outside of Kurt's room I glanced through the crack left by the partially closed door, expecting to see my son sleeping peacefully in his bed. I felt a jolt of panic though when I found the bed empty. I pushed the door the rest of the way open and took a hurried step inside, only to stop short again.
Kurt was at his bedroom window hanging what appeared to be one of Kathleen's empty perfume bottles in the window as he softly sang 'Silent Night'. It was then that I remembered what day it way. I had been so wrapped up in my grief and just meeting basic needs for both of us that I hadn't paid attention to the passing days. Had totally missed the preparations for the holiday that must have been taken place around me or perhaps I just hadn't wanted to acknowledge them. Kathleen had always loved this time of year and I hadn't wanted to face a Christmas without her.
Kurt hadn't forgotten though - the makeshift ornament he was now hanging in the window in lieu of a tree told me that.
It also jolted me back to reality. I couldn't avoid painful things like holiday just because it hurt. Kurt needed more than just his basic needs met - he needed me to keep living so that he could too.
"That's a lovely ornament, Kurt," I said, announcing my presence to my son as I headed toward his closet.
"I wanted to let Santa know that I hadn't forgotten him," Kurt replied.
"Well, I'm sure that will get his attention," I told him, grabbing his coat. "But let's go get us a Christmas tree so he has something to put the presents under," I added, crossing to him, and helping him into his coat.
I wasn't sure how I was going to manage it, but there would be presents under the tree in the morning - the tree I was taking Kurt to go get now so we could decorate it. We'd both be up past his bedtime tonight but it was a special occasion after all.