Accompanying Soundtrack: Brandon Chandler – "We Are Everything"
Jen texted Jess, and they'd agreed to a post-work date on Saturday, which at 1 in the morning was very likely to lead to an overnight stay, something Jen was very comfortable with right now. She also thought about her Friday night date with Tilly and smiled to herself, wondering how the tables had turned in her favour so quickly and unexpectedly.
Jen had been nervous all day because despite the obvious history between them, this was still effectively a first date. Sunday had been something entirely unplanned, but this was officially a date. A date with someone she'd loved so deeply in the past and had never really abandoned those feelings, but also a date with someone who already had a girlfriend. Jen frowned as she remembered that whilst Tilly had promised to eventually finish with Esther, there was no guarantee she actually would. And for that reason Jen needed to look her best and for it to be a memorable night. That's why she'd had to think a little harder than normal about what to do, and decided a trip out of the city would be something nice for both of them.
Friday night seemed to take forever to arrive as anticipation and expectation has a nasty habit of making time move ten times slower, but finally it had arrived and Jen was taking her time over her outfit. She knew what Tilly liked to see her in and she didn't want to disappoint – a skirt, with a reasonably tight black shirt on top and some calf length boots were the order of the evening.
She picked Tilly up as agreed, but she hadn't told her where they were going. She drove them out of town and a little way and soon they were onto country lanes and they eventually ended up in Hebden Bridge, lesbian mecca of the North and a place where eyelids would remain unbatted at the deviant suggestion of a romantic meal between two women. Jen had chosen here because she wanted to take Tilly somewhere she would never have been before, but also somewhere they could talk freely without judgemental ears straining at them.
They parked up, and even though it was 7pm and dark the place was still reasonably busy. It was one of those communities in which you could freely exist without attracting judgement, and Tilly gazed into some artistic shop windows as Jen led her to the restaurant.
"This place is so quaint!" Tilly whispered to Jen as they took off their coats and sat down at their table. A young lady came over, introduced herself as their waitress and left them each a menu.
"And so very gay!" replied Jen. Tilly looked around to see a room full of same-sex couples, eating their meals, chatting, and generally feeling relaxing and welcome. Jen wanted the evening to be as normal and easy as possible so Tilly could see there was no drama, which would hopefully allow them to slip comfortably back in to each others company and further remind Tilly what she'd been missing.
"I sort of know the owner of this place, she's a friend of one of my work colleagues, and I've never had the opportunity to try it out. I though this would be the perfect time." She smiled cheerfully at Tilly, who reciprocated over the top of her menu.
Figuring it easier to take some of the unspoken pressure off the evening, Jen said quietly, "I don't really want to talk about the past or Esther tonight. I just want to chat like normal people – like a normal first date, where people get to know each other and find out what's going on in their lives."
Tilly laughed but looked a little confused
"You know most of what's going on in my life though, Jen."
They were interrupted by the waitress asking for their food order, and Jen ordered the pesto chicken and Tilly ordered a salad. With Jen driving, Tilly courteously stuck to a soft drink.
"I know the bit about you having a girlfriend, sleeping with your ex-girlfriend," she raised an eyebrow speaking of herself in the third person, "and that you're at uni. What I'd like to know is the stuff in between. How did you get on with your A-Levels, and why are you studying at Manchester now?"
Tilly wasn't entirely expecting the date to pan out this way, but then she wasn't really sure what her expectations of the date actually were, so she happily obliged.
"Well, before I came back to Hollyoaks 6th form I'd been doing a compressed history of art course at the other college, and I'd also started a doing Art and Design to run along side. I knew that swapping my course after lower sixth kind of screwed my timeline up, and maybe I reason I did it was initially for the wrong reasons," she looked sheepishly at Jen, knowing her initial switch was borne out of revenge, "but I love it so much now I couldn't imagine doing anything else."
Jen smiled, knowing that Tilly's love of art had always been there, but she might have had a small influence on helping her realise the need to change academic direction.
"So by the end of the year I'd got enough credits to apply for Uni, and I went through clearing and so I'm studying at the Manchester School of Art. George is doing Fashion Design, and Callum is doing American Studies. We all decided that after the hell of the minibus crash and losing so many of the friends we loved so dearly, each other's support meant so much that we should try and study in the same place. Those two are friends for life." Tilly smiled waveringly, the thoughts of the past were still emotional and raw, and every time she thought of Maddie and the others it pinched a nerve.
"Friends are the most important people in our lives because we choose them, I totally get that," and she smiled supportively at Tilly. "You're enjoying the course I take it?"
"Oh, it's fantastic, Jen! When I think about if I was still doing all the training to be a doctor… that just fills me with dread to have thought I could make such a mistake. I'm so in love with art…" she broke off her impassioned speech and smiled broadly at Jen. Jen was resting her head on her hand, listening intently, and knew that whilst she was only a small factor in helping Tilly decide her educational direction, but she felt proud for any influence she'd had.
Their meals arrived and as they ate Tilly continued to talk about that past year. Her parents hadn't been happy with the change, but in the end respected the decisions made by their headstrong daughter. Tilly's self-assurance was one of the things which attracted Jen most in the first place. As Jen listened she felt herself more and more comfortable being there with Tilly, but she kept reminding herself that as much as she wanted to she couldn't allow herself to totally fall for Tilly again until the Esther issue was resolved.
"So, what about yourself?" Tilly asked enquiringly, "I've done nothing but talk, so it's your turn," and she cheekily stuck her tongue out.
"Well, obviously I needed to just escape Hollyoaks as quickly as possible. I couldn't bear to stay, the embarrassment was just immense, and as I didn't have any real ties there, I just wanted a clean getaway. It's fair to say it's not been the easiest of times getting work elsewhere, but I was a substitute teacher for a while, and at the end of last term they offered me a position full time. Not being prosecuted means there's nothing on my record particularly, but I did so much good work at Hollyoaks and not having a reference from that looks suspicious. The head teacher was impressed with me though, so they gave me a chance, but I've got quite a substantial 12 month probationary period to deal with at this school." She sighed and frowned a little at the thought, and knew she was lucky to have a teaching job at all.
Tilly sat and looked at Jen, hearing the tinge of pain as she spoke, and could see how difficult it was for her to lay herself bare to the person that created the pain in the first place.
"Anyway," feeling the need to change the subject, "H has been my rock since I moved back here. Without that deviant I'd certainly have lost my mind. She reminds me daily who I am and keeps me grounded and sane."
As they finished their food and Jen paid the bill, she was happy they'd just had the opportunity to chat and discover each other some more - It was an integral part to rebuilding their relationship. She couldn't dwell on the past, and as they concluded their meal she was happy they'd made progress, and knew though it was still a fair way off they could make something out of this. Enhancing the emotional connection was equally as important as the physical.
As they headed back out towards the car to drive home, it was starting to rain and the temperature had fallen. Jen felt Tilly take her hand and they remained locked together for the rest of the walk back, not saying anything but just appreciating the moment.