Author's Note:
There is a bit of drama this chapter.
"Come here Baby Girl." Sherlock moved instantly to pick up their daughter. "Love, New York City traffic is horrendous. Do you want to take the tube? I think American's call it a subway here." He had been on it before and he was a little nervous it wouldn't be safe for the children. There were all kinds of strange people on it. He wanted to know his husband's input on it before making a decision though.
Thomas looked around the big city in amazement. It seemed to be bigger even than London. So busy. So many people, just bustling around and going he didn't know where. Everyone seemed to be in a hurry. He gripped his Dad's hand a little tighter.
They had a lot of options and the direction they were going he knew that taking the tube was probably a lot faster. Right away, though, John could tell that Sherlock was hesitant about it. "I have no idea but I think we can walk." If Thomas got tired he would definitely carry the boy if need be.
Amy buried her face into Sherlock's neck and whimper as all the people passed them. "I likes London better a'cause there isn't as many peoples." Both of her hands were wrapped up in Sherlock's dress jacket, holding it as tight as she could manage.
Walk? That would take awhile but Sherlock supposed they did have all day. It would certainly wear out the family. He smiled at little Sandi. "Everything will be fine Baby Girl. Papa's got you." He kissed her head and lead his family down the side walks of New York City with seemingly no problem at all.
Thomas continued to look around at all the buildings and people. He clung a little tighter to his Dad yet again. It would be scary to get lost in a place like this. A lot scarier than being stuck on the island had ever been.
John looked down at Thomas with a gentle smile, pulling the boy a little closer to his side was they walked through the crowds of people. "I can carry you if you want, Thomas." The boy thought it looked silly, he knew, but it was probably the safest way to make sure that they didn't lose either of their kids.
Amy looked up at her Papa and hiccuped just a bit, licking her lips as she glanced over at Dada and Thomas. She felt safe in her Papa's arms and slowly started to relax. "Makes sure that Dada and 'Mas is okays, too, Papa," she whispered in his ear.
Sherlock smiled and glanced over to John and Thomas. "They are fine Baby Girl. I promise. I won't let anything happen to any you." He kissed her head again, hoping he had successfully reassured their daughter.
Thomas shook his head. He was too old to be held. He was gradually getting used to all the people around him and the grip on his Dad's hand loosened a bit.
Well that clearly wasn't going to happen. As they continued to pass large amounts of people on the street John was starting to wish they had gone on the subway instead and as his son's hand slowly loosened from his own he simply stepped closer, grabbing as much of Thomas' hand as he could manage. "Oi, hold on to me," he murmured.
Amy whimpered and squirmed slightly in Sherlock's arms to peak over his shoulder to glance at John and Thomas. Right away she noticed how her older brother seemed to be a bit distanced from her Dada and that made her unhappy so in order to get Sherlock's attention she let out a soft cry.
Sherlock frowned the moment he heard little Sandi cry. What was wrong? "Baby Girl. Shhh. Papa is right here. So is Thomas and Dada. Everything is fine." He ran a hand through her hair gently, hoping to help calm down their daughter.
Thomas looked up to his Dad. "Sorry," he muttered. Amy's cry caught his attention immediately. He wanted to rush to comfort here but he was supposed to hold onto an adult's hand at all times while on vacation. He hated seeing her cry and upset. She deserved to be happy all the time.
John watched Sherlock and Amy for a long moment before looking down at Thomas with a sigh. It constantly felt like he couldn't do anything right for their son and he hated it. "I'm sorry, too, I just don't want to lose you," he said softly.
Amy whimpered a bit and sniffed, rubbing at her eyes before looking at Sherlock. "I just doesn't wants t-to lose thems, Papa," she whispered as she started to relax in his arms again. It was clear she was starting to calm down just a bit, watching as her older brother started walking closer to Dada again.
Sherlock slowed down his walking pace, so he could walk next to Thomas and John. Maybe that would help little Sandi feel better. It was easy for him to whisk away up ahead because of his long legs. Sometimes, he forgot he needed to take shorter strides.
Thomas smiled up Amy, when his Daddy dropped back. She seemed to be doing better. Ouch. Someone had run into him on the side walk and knocked him down. He hadn't even realized it, but he had lost contact wit his Dad's hand. After a few moment's he realized he had lost his family. He stood up quickly to look for them but it was hard to see with so many adult's around. Don't panic. Don't cry. Daddy wouldn't panic or cry, but he was all alone in a big city and that was scary. He sniffled but no tears fell. "Dad? Daddy?" His voice was scared and he tried to yell but he was certain his cries wouldn't be heard above the roaring sounds around him.
John grunted as somebody bumped into him and before long he was being pushed forward. "Shit," he murmured, panicking right away as he looked up at his husband. "Thomas!" His frantic shouting was drawing attention but he didn't care because he'd just lost their son on the streets of New York City. Why was he such a bloody idiot? "Thomas!" He was trying to shove through the crowds of people but was making no progress at all.
Instantly Amy curled into Sherlock, crying quietly. Somehow she knew that screaming wouldn't make the problem better at all so instead she just buried her face into his jacket with several small whimpers.
No. Sherlock stopped suddenly, barely avoiding a collision of his own. He hadn't felt a panic grip his chest so tight since seeing John get shot at the store. It had seemed so long ago. "Thomas!" He couldn't shove people out of his way because he was holding little Sandi. How was he supposed to keep her calm when he wasn't even calm himself?
Thomas thought he heard voices shouting his name but he just couldn't see. He was too short. He was scared and before he knew it, he was breathing heavily. A stranger came up to him asking if he was all right. He shrieked and ran away. He wasn't supposed to talk to strangers. Which way had his family gone? He just wanted to see his Daddy and Dad again. And of course Amy. Would he be lost in America forever? Would his family even care he was gone? He couldn't hold in the tears anymore, he ran through the side walks of New York City blinded by his tears.
John turned and looked at his husband, eyes wide. This wasn't London and people hardly knew them here, if at all. New York City was massive and their son was somewhere out there. "Stay calm, keep Amy safe." He pulled his small mobile out, finally thankful for something Mycroft had done for them. "See, look. You've got yours, too. I'm going to go in that direction to find him. Keep her calm." He stood on his toes, placed a quick kiss on Sherlock's lips, and moved to start pushing his way through the crowds as he continued to shout Thomas' name.
Amy kept herself as calm as possible, whimpering into Sherlock's neck as she watched John run off to find her older brother. "W-Why would Dada jus' lets go of 'Mas like that, Papa? A'cause h-he's is my brother and we can'ts just leaves him like that."
What? John wanted to split up? Sherlock supposed that made sense but he didn't like the idea. Hopefully it would help Thomas faster though. He looked down at little Sandi with a slight frown. "Dada didn't mean to let go Baby Girl. Someone ran into them, rather rudely I might add, and they got separated. We will find Thomas, I promise." They had to. His husband would never forgive himself if they didn't. And home just wouldn't be home without their son.
Thomas was trying to calm down. Running around like this was stupid. What had he been thinking? He was being a stupid baby. He finally stopped running and turned the see the same stranger from before? Had this man followed him here? He backed away slowly. He didn't like the look in the man's eyes. There was something...what was the word...? Predatory...? "Help! Dad! Daddy!" He was getting frantic again. "GET AWAY!" The stranger had grabbed his arm and he tried to twist away but the grip around him was too strong.
As John managed to push himself through the crowds he heard their son's screams, moving faster and not caring what other people were saying to him. That was his son, dammit, and something was definitely going wrong. By the time he broke through a few more people he saw some man grabbing Thomas and anger simply overtook his body. Without a thought he charged forward and tackled the man to the ground, shoving his face into the cement as he looked up at their son and panting heavily. "Thomas, are you all right?" He reached a hand out and rested it gently on the boy's cheek."I am so sorry, my little boy."
Amy studied Sherlock curiously, her head tilted a little to the side. "Peoples in 'Mericas is kinda rude and I doesn't likes it if they is gonna be rude to 'Mas." She murmured curiously, biting her bottom lip. "Maybe peoples will get nicer when we gets out of New York."
Sherlock managed a small smile. "Yes, people in America can be very rude sometimes Baby Girl but not all them are like that." Leave it to little Sandi to be able to calm him down a bit. He kept running his fingers through her hair, not just for her but for himself also.
Thomas went wide eyed as he watched his Dad tackle the scary man to the ground. He threw his arms around John immediately in a big hug. "Dad! You came for me!" He sniffled into his Dad's shirt and watched the scary man get up and the run away from them. Daddy was right, Dad was a hero. He continued to cling tightly to John, afraid that letting go would result in getting separated again.
John wrapped his arms tight around his son, not bothering to chase after the man. "Of course I did," he whispered as he pulled back just a bit to look at Thomas. "God, I thought I'd lost you. I was so scared," he murmured as he ran a hand soothingly through the boy's hair. Sod if he thought he was too old, these streets were far too busy. He hoisted Thomas up and held him close, thankful for the small bit of working out he still managed to get in so he could hold the boy. With ease he reached into his pocket to call his husband so they could find a meet-up time.
Amy smiled back and pressed the tip of her nose against Sherlock's. "Okay," she whispered before she heard her Papa's mobile going off. "Does you thinks it is Dada?" She gazed back up at Sherlock hopefully.
Sherlock nodded. "It probably is Baby Girl." He couldn't imagine who else it could be, maybe besides Mycroft but he couldn't imagine his older brother calling them while on holiday unless something important had happened. He checked the caller ID briefly before answering. "John, did you find him?"
Thomas didn't care that his Dad was holding him right now. The comfort was welcome. He clung tightly to John, his face buried in his Dad's shirt.
John let out a soft sigh of relief, smiling a bit even though his husband couldn't see it. "Yeah, I did," he said softly into the mobile, turning to place a soft kiss on their son's head as he started walking in the direction he came from. "D'you see that McDonald's? It's going to be on your left, I can see the massive sign for it. Let's meet there because I know Thomas has been asking for it."
Amy sat in her Papa's arm's patiently, looking up at him as she attempted to listen in on what was being said. "Did he finds 'Mas? Papa, did he?" She squirmed a little in Sherlock's arms.
Oh thank God. Sherlock spotted the McDonald's easily enough. "All right. See you both soon Love." He terminated the call and put his mobile away so could carry little Sandi easier. "Yes Baby Girl. We are going to them right now."
Thomas didn't want to go anywhere the rest of the day except back to the hotel. He didn't say anything because he didn't want to ruin his family's vacation. He just kept his head buried in his Dads' shoulder.
John easily carried Thomas toward the McDonald's, smiling softly in simple relief that he'd managed to find their son. "I've got you," he whispered again when he felt his son tense up just a bit. "I'm right here and I'm not going to let you go." With that he slowly entered the restaurant, not even moving to set the boy down. Right now he was feeling far too protective to do anything but hold him.
Amy smiled up at Sherlock and squirmed just a bit when she saw John and Thomas come in. "Looks, Papa," she whispered happily, one hand moving to haphazardly clutch at his long hair. "Dada and 'Mas is backs! Looks!"
Sherlock smiled and walked over to John and Thomas. Their son looked shaken up. Scared. He shifted little Sandi a bit, so he could reach out a hand and stroke their son's head a bit. "How about I order. Happy meals for the children. Chips for Thomas...sorry French fries, we are in America right now." He smirked a bit, hoping he had been able to cheer the boy up.
Thomas usually craved any kind of contact from Daddy but right now he was afraid to let go of his Dad. What if he got lost again? What if that stranger came and found him again? What if Dad didn't save him in time again? He took a deep, shuttering breath. He had to be a big boy. If he didn't panic while on aeroplane he could be brave for his family. He was just having trouble getting there.
While the situation was horrible, John felt like a good father for their son for the first time since they'd found him on that island years ago. "Yeah," he whispered with a small nod, smiling tightly at his husband. The look on his face clearly communicated that they would need to talk later about what had happened and, as much as he hated to admit it, that maybe their son needed a bit of counseling. Something to help lift his spirits. With a nod toward one of the tables he moved and slid into a both, easily keeping Thomas on his lap. "I'm right here," he whispered into the boy's hair, gently rocking him.
Amy bit her bottom lip and looked up at Sherlock as John and Thomas walked away. "I thinks that somethings might have happened," she whispered softly, looking at him with wide eyes. "But I doesn't wants anything to happen."
Shock shook Sherlock. That was not the response he had expected. Usually Thomas was so receptive to anything he said and any kind of contact from him. Now he was shut out. Right. He should have seen that coming. John was the better father after all. He walked up the small line and waited to order. He glanced at their daughter. "Maybe Baby Girl." He had seen the look in his husband's eyes and now he was worried. What had happened?
"I'm fine," Thomas mumbled. He still clung tightly to his Dad though, not wanting to leave the comfort or safety of John. At least he wasn't at school where everyone would laugh at him for being such a wuss.
John watched his husband for a long moment before smiling just a bit at Thomas. "You did the right thing, today. I heard you calling for help and we know not to talk to strangers," he whispered as he moved a hand to run up and down the boy's back as soothingly as possible. "I am very proud of you, Thomas." Now he just had to fix everything between their son and Sherlock because he'd seen the shock in his husband's eyes right away. "And I think that Daddy is very proud of you, too."
Amy felt the change in her Papa right away and whimpered as she tried to make him feel better. "'Mas is gonna be fine, Papa. He will talks to you again a'cause he loves everybody and always talks to them. I promise."
Sherlock managed a faint smile at what little Sandi said. He supposed she was right. He stepped up to the register and ordered Happy Meals for the children and a salad for John. Nothing for him. He had already eaten at breakfast. He had gotten Thomas a soda as well as the chips, something his husband probably wouldn't approve of but he thought maybe their son needed something to feel better. While he waited for the order he eyed the selection at the fountain station. He decided to get 'Sprite' for Thomas.
Thomas was finally beginning to calm down the longer he stayed pressed to his Dad's chest. He realized he had totally just brush of his Daddy and it gave him one more thing to hate about myself. "Is Daddy going to be mad at me?" He finally lifted his face to look up at John.
John looked down at Thomas and smiled softly, running a hand gently through the boy's hair. "Of course not, my little boy," he whispered softly. "He will be just fine and he understands that you might be going through some things. Y'know, he doesn't know what happened but I will talk to him." With a small nod he placed a kiss on their son's forehead. "He won't be mad at you at all."
Amy watched her Papa get everything ready and then glanced at the table. "'Mas likes chips so he is goings to be happy," she said with a nod, grinning up at Sherlock as she placed a kiss on his cheek. "And soda. He likes it, too."
Sherlock smiled at little Sandi. "I know he does Baby Girl." He heard their order number called and got the tray after he got John a diet Coke. It took some maneuvering but he managed to balance the tray and Amy. He walked over to the table where his husband and son were already sitting. He got a booster seat for Amy and set her down in it next to him.
Thomas nodded slowly. "Okay Dad." He hugged John again and when the food came he was finally calm enough to begin eating. Daddy even brought him soda! He grinned happily since the first time getting separated from his family.
As Sherlock sat across from him all John could do was smile, easily reaching around their son to pick up his cup and take a sip. Diet Coke. "Oh, you're good," he said with a wink in his husband's direction. Before long he was moving to gently set Thomas beside him, setting the boy's lunch in front of him before looking over at Amy. "And you, Miss Amy, how did you enjoy helping order lunch for everybody?"
"Dada, I helps!" Amy said as she looked at Sherlock expectantly. Her chicken nuggets were waiting and she was desperate to get her hands on them. "And we gots 'Mas chips and a soda a'cause he likes them and Papa, he even gots you a salad a'cause yous is dieting since you gots fat."
Sherlock raised his eyebrows at what little Sandi said. John probably wouldn't be amused but he couldn't help the smirk on his lips. He had never actually said the words, let alone think them. Hopefully his husband knew that. He had just ordered what John always got on the rare occasions they actually came to McDonald's.
Thomas went wide eyed. He glanced between his parents, wondering if a fight was going to happen now. He nibbled on his chips nervously, knowing better than to even try and get the toy out before he was finished eating.
Right. Children always said things without thinking and were by far the most honest people John had ever met. "Baby Girl, we do not call people fat," he said softly, even managing a smile. He'd already managed to lose a bit of weight as it was so he wasn't feeling too horribly torn down by the comment. "We only call them nice things, all right?" Hopefully just brushing it off with nothing more than a lesson for their daughter would alleviate the sudden tension at their table.
"Oh, okays," Amy said with a nod, looking back at Sherlock expectantly. "Um, Papa? May I please has my chicken nuggets? I is hungry." After a small nod she smiled, clearly trying to charm her father into getting what she wanted.
Shit. Sherlock had been so shocked by what little Sandi said he had forgotten to give their daughter her food. He smiled at Amy. "Of course Baby Girl. Here you go." He reached into the Happy Meal and got out her chicken nuggets. He grabbed the apple slices next, opening it for her so she could eat those as well. He opened her chocolate milk next. He figured Amy deserved a bit of a treat too, since Thomas had gotten one as well.
Whew. Thomas continued to eat his food. Daddy wasn't eating. That was nothing new. It still puzzled him why Sherlock didn't eat like the rest of the family did. He had never really asked and simply just accepted it as something normal in his family. "We should still go to Ellis Island." He nodded a bit even though the thought of getting lost again scared him.
John watched Sherlock with a small smile, moving one of his feet under the table to gently rest it on top of his husband's. "You look very good today, love," he said softly as he took a large bite of his salad and grinned. Delicious despite coming from a fast food restaurant.
Amy took a bite of a chicken nugget before her eyes went wide. "Chocolate milks?" She lookrd at the carton and then took a drink of it happily, some of it spilling down the front of her clothes. It was clear that she didn't mind at all because she simply continued on with her meal, digging into the apple slices happily.
Good thing they had a change of clothes for little Sandi in the bag. Shame about her pretty dress though. Sherlock was used to it though. Amy was just at that age. He smirked at John even though he felt stupid in shorts and a polo shirt. "Well, you look rather adorable." The smirk only got bigger because he knew how his husband would react.
Thomas frowned a bit. Ignored. Just like at school. Oh well. He decided to eat in silence, his feet gently swaying in the air since he wasn't tall enough to reach the ground.
John blushed and looked down at his salad, biting his bottom lip. "Oi, I'm not adorable," he murmured with a soft laugh, reaching an arm out and gently wrapping them around Thomas' shoulders. After everything that had happened he was feeling over-protective of the boy and wanted to be near him as often as possible. "Thomas, though, he's rather handsome, is he not?" He smiled down at their son.
Right away Amy agreed, nodding her head as she started on her next chicken nugget. "'Mas is very handsomes." She took another drink of her chocolate milk, this time with less of a mess, and looked over at Sherlock. "I thinks that he looks like you, Papa."
Sherlock smiled at little Sandi. She was always saying that, how Thomas looked like him. He didn't see it really except for when their son had dressed up for Halloween last year. "He is a fine looking lad, isn't it?" He smirked because he knew Thomas would react much like John just had.
Thomas averted his gaze, his cheeks flushing. "I'm not handsome," he muttered. Family was supposed to say nice things, at least the kids at school were honest although admittedly mean about it. One of the bullies at school had told him a beating to the face would be an improvement. He had never told his parents. He sighed at his thoughts, his head still down.
In a mere few moments John had gone from feeling confident around their son to feeling completely worthless. What did he do now? "You are very handsome," he whispered as he moved his hand to gently tilt Thomas' head up so they could look at each other. "One of the most handsome young men I have ever met and the most amazing son." The smile on his face was soft and genuine as he studied the boy at his side.
"Oh," Amy whispered, looking over at Sherlock and blushing just a bit. So many compliments, things she knew that her older brother wasn't used to hearing. "'Mas, you really is fantastic a'cause you is my older brother and you does everythings for me to makes me happy and...and I loves you."
Sherlock wasn't sure he could teach Thomas confidence. Growing up at the Holmes Manor everyone had been pretty assertive, arrogant, stubborn. Sometimes he just didn't know what to do or say to connect with their son. The boy was sensitive about things and at times he really just didn't know how to handle it. Here he was, failing just like his father had failed him.
Thomas met his Dad's eyes briefly before looking away again. He didn't like compliments. They were stupid and never true! At least, not about him anyway. He glanced up to Amy and managed a small smile. "I love you too Sis."
Apparently that wasn't going to work at all for them. John sighed and returned to his meal, stabbing at his salad and taking the bites as he let the silence around them take over. All he wanted to do was make Thomas feel loved and he could hardly do that. Sometimes he had a feeling that Sherlock was a far better father than him simply because of how much both of the children loved him.
Amy returned the smile and promptly went back to her meal, swinging her feet as she ate another chicken nugget. "I likes family time a'cause we all gets to spend time together and it's really good," she said with a smile. "I wish that we could does this all the time."
Sherlock frowned, everyone seemed lost in thought of some sort. Except little Sandi, blissfully unaware. They were on holiday, they were supposed to be having a good time. He needed to say or do something to cheer them all up, but what?
Thomas continued to eat. It was his fault no one was talking now. "Thank you for the nice words...I just..." He trailed off with a shrug. How was he supposed to explain he just didn't know how to handle them really? The only people whoever said nice things about him were family members so he found them hard to accept.
Right away John turned to look at Thomas, smiling just a bit. "You shouldn't have to say anything after that, Thomas. You're a fantastic son and you've been the most amazing little boy to watch grow up. I am so proud of you." He leaned forward and pressed a kiss on top of their son's head. "And I love you."
All of the attention on her brother made Amy grin, studying her brother happily. She sometimes felt horrible for her brother and really only wanted him to happy. "Um, Papa," she took a bite from her apple and then licked her lips. "Why does you call me Sandi?" Her head tilted to the side as she studied him curiously.
Sherlock raised his eyebrows in surprise from the question. "Well, it is my nickname for you Baby Girl. Your middle name is Sandoval. Sandi is short for that." Would she grow up hating it? Want him to stop? The thought hurt more than he would ever admit.
Thomas blushed again, looking away from his Dad. How come he couldn't be more like Daddy? Daddy always just smirked and took all compliments with ease. Then again, everything said about Daddy was true.
John watched Thomas with a smile before wrapping an arm around the boy's shoulders and pulling him closer while he continued to eat. Everything he'd said about their son had been completely true and he didn't regret any of it. Then again, he always knew that he'd come second to Sherlock in Thomas' mind and he'd accepted that fact long ago.
Amy bit her bottom lip and nodded. "I really likes it," she said softly as she leaned forward in her booster seat and held an apple slice out to Sherlock. "A'cause Sand...uh, Sandoval? It is a really creative name just likes Sherlock."
Sherlock couldn't help but smirk proudly. Well, it had been one of the names he had come up when they discussed them. "I like it too Baby Girl." Might as well humor their daughter. He leaned forward a bit so he could eat the apple being offered to him. "Thank you Sweetie."
Thomas continued to eat, his face finally returning to a normal color. He glanced up at John. "You are the best Dad ever." He gave a small shy smile.
Oh. John let a blush spread across his cheeks as he looked down at Thomas, smiling just a bit before he nodded. That was never something he expected to hear from Thomas at all. "And you are the best son ever," he whispered softly as he abandoned his food in favor of pulling their son into a hug. "And I love having you as a son."
Amy giggled and put both of her hands on her face, watching her Papa curiously. "You eats it like a doggy," she giggled again and kicked her feet up. "Again! Again!" She held out a half-eaten chicken nugget excitedly.