Thank you for the reviews: Lauren, Hi14 x, 1222mercedes1222, awesomeone21, therealchamps, my time is now, and cena's baby doll. I apologize for the longer wait; college got in the way. Enjoy everybody!

Randy stared at the closed door, feeling himself dwindle. Never in his entire life had he seen Alyssa so mad, and this was all his fault. His sick mind had stretched the ugly truth and caused damaged.

Why'd he do it? It was simple: Alyssa was his only true source of happiness.

And damn him for wanting desperately to claim it.

At the time, when he was talking to John, he didn't see the issue in lying. All he was thinking was about was communicating his feelings for Alyssa. After all, actions speak louder than words, and Randy thought that by saying they hooked up, those actions - although false- would somehow confess things he was having trouble saying. It's clear now that he'd gone the cowardly route. Not to mention, he completely betrayed Alyssa in the process.

Not only did she forgive him for what he'd done to her that night, but now he'd gone behind her back and lied about it. But what else was he supposed to do? How else was he supposed to admit the feelings he'd been denying himself? He told Alyssa all of his secrets, until she became one of them. And now, the secret was still not out and the situation was even worse.

Randy continued staring at the closed door. His heart was twisting through crazy palpitations, because unlike their previous fights, he knew she wasn't going to come back.

Alyssa woke up in panic. The worst part: the nightmare was her reality. She looked beside her and there Randy was: naked.

The contents of last night was unbelievable, like a horrid crime report from someone else's life. Randy was drunk. He was more drunk than he'd ever been in his entire life. It was a surprise he even made it to bed. And like the good best friend Alyssa was, she looked after him and slept beside him like she'd done a myriad of times before. She, too, fell asleep and in the middle of the night, he was suddenly on top of her. She resisted him, and resisted him, and resisted him. But despite his inebriation, he was still far too strong to fight.

She remembered crying and him suppressing her sobs with his lips. She remembered him pinning her wrists together as he pulled off her pants. She remembered pleading with him to stop up until he rammed himself into her. She remembered that much, and everything else, she'd pulled away from consciousness. She doesn't remember how she got through the rest of night. She doesn't remember how it ended. She doesn't remember when and how she fell asleep. All she knows is, Randy had gone somewhere he wasn't supposed to go.

And now, all she wanted was to forget everything. She wanted desperately to blur every bit of it. Unfortunately, the tension in her body, the bruises on her skin, and the piercing ache in between her legs could not be wiped away. The evidence would remain no matter how hard she forced herself to forget.

Alyssa let out a ragged breath. What the hell was she supposed to do now?

She looked beside her again and nearly jumped.

Randy was intently staring at her. Jesus, how long had he been doing that?

She opened her mouth, but closed it as soon as she realized she had nothing to say. She watched as Randy's eyes traveled along her naked back, wondering what wild implications he was piecing in his head. The discomfort she felt under his gaze lingered even after he looked away to examine his own nakedness.

Alyssa closed her eyes, her skin prickling as she did. The absolute worst part of all this: he probably doesn't remember what he did.

"Al-" Randy spoke. The simple sound of his voice was enough to make her flinch.

"Randy, please." She opened her eyes and dared bravely to look him in the face. "Just- can we just forget about all this?"

He studied her orbs and began to nod. He didn't quite understand what he was agreeing to but from the looks of it, he was being asked to keep a secret. And then, he noticed the bruises on her arms. Horror set in on his face, and he knew, he knew what he'd done.

Alyssa wrapped the blanket more securely around herself and got off the bed. She began gathering her clothes. Her whole body shook. It felt impossible to be composed, to be comfortable in her own skin, to feel safe. It's like she'd been stripped in front of the whole world and was handcuffed to a post for everyone to see. In some aspects, what happened to her last night was even worse. Her own best friend had done this to her.

She closed her eyes and tightened her grip on the fabric that covered her. She turned back around to face Randy, desperate to free herself from these memories, desperate to move on. "I'm gonna get dressed in the bathroom, then go."

All he could do was nod. He felt like scum.

Alyssa dragged her feet across the room and inched further and further away from him. Before she completely disappeared from view, she looked at her best friend once more. "Promise me we won't ever speak of this."

"I promise," he answered without thought. What happened last night had barely processed in his head; he really didn't know what to say. He could barely keep up.

Alyssa forced what appeared to be a smile, but after years of knowing her, Randy knew it couldn't mask the fact that she was a different person now.

"You must be happy you finally got what you wanted."

Randy, minding his own business at catering, angled his head to the side. He arched an eyebrow. "What?"

"Nothing. I think your sandwich is ready," John smirked. He grabbed a can of red bull before heading towards the first register.

Completely detached, Randy shook his head and got his food. Six o'clock was far too early to be awake, and although this was nothing new, he still couldn't deal with the fact that his friendship with Alyssa was in ruins. He woke up, remembering instantly what had transpired, only to wish he hadn't. He'd gone from being a married man to a divorced man. And now, he'd gone from having Alyssa by his side to not having her at all. How the hell was he supposed to deal now?

He numbed himself mentally as he walked to his car. This was just another day at work, and if that's all he focused on, he just might survive. But no matter how hard he tried to not think, he found himself constantly searching for Alyssa's face. He kept seeing her, but he knew it was just his subconscious trying to deal with the fact that she would be no where near him.

Randy got to his car and saw the clock read 6:26. It'd only been 26 minutes since he opened his eyes this morning, but it might as well been eternity. Time always stood still when all you wanted was for it to pass.

Meanwhile, John was on his way back to his hotel room. Thankfully for him, work wasn't until the house show later that night. He actually preferred this newly found solitude. He didn't feel the need for any type of company and being in Australia for months definitely prepped him for it. He could be alone forever, and he wouldn't give a shit.

He hummed along the hallway but was immediately silenced once he saw Alyssa propped up against his door. His heart sunk to his stomach and all the pretending of feeling okay went down with it.

John stood perfectly still, not daring to move an inch closer. He almost wanted to turn around and run away, but unfortunately, she'd already seen him. Her muscles appeared to be much stiffer, and her eyes looked swollen.

"John-" she stepped towards him, and he stepped back.

Why was she trying to further salt the open wounds? He didn't see the point in this. He didn't need to hear her say she'd betrayed him by hooking up with Randy then betrayed him again by hiding it. Sorry would not change anything. Sorry would not fill the gaping hole.

"John-"

He put up his free hand while his other gripped tighter around his canned drink. "Alyssa, I don't wanna do this right now."

"But John-" Her eyes were desperately pleading.

He tried to step around her, daring not to look in her burning gaze again.

But she blocked him. When she spoke, her voice was much more whole. "Look, I'm well aware I missed to tell you something-"

John shook his head and chuckled. "You think?"

"Why are you being such an ass about it?" She narrowed her eyes, and suddenly, the atmosphere grew cold.

"An ass? I'm being an ass?" John pointed at himself with a smirk on his face. Truth of the matter was, he just couldn't be around Alyssa. It hurt too much, and the last thing he wanted was to be engulfed in that pain.

"First of all, we weren't even together. And second of all, you're the one that kept Randy from knowing about us for all these months."

John's patience grew thin. All the blood rushed to his head and his ears began to pound. "You really gonna use that 'not together' card? You and I both know that's complete bullshit. And what does Randy knowing even have to do with anything? Would that have changed what happened?"

Alyssa knew that was a rhetorical question, but yes. It would've changed everything. Alyssa wanted so badly to tell him that, but just like last night, she couldn't utter a single response. She was choking in her own words, sinking into horrid thoughts. If Randy knew about them, maybe he wouldn't have touched her. Maybe he would've never put his hands on her. Maybe she wouldn't have blotched patches on her skin or a sore back or have a splitting ache in between her legs. Maybe she would still have John.

"And you know what Alyssa, for some time, you didn't wanna tell Randy either. So don't even point the finger at me."

"But why'd you hesitate to tell him even after I told you that everything would be okay? That he'd accept it?"

"Why? Who cares about the whys," John shrugged. To hell with reasons. To hell with excuses. He just wanted to move on. "But just to get things straight, I was never after Randy's approval."

Alyssa crossed her arms, her lips stiff. "Then why'd you wait so long to tell him?"

When John didn't provide an answer, she did. "Because you had so little faith and you were scared that he'd fuck us up."

He still said nothing.

"Well, guess what John, we got fucked up anyways."

John slowly nodded his head, as if giving it some thought. "No, you're absolute right. We're fucked, and that's just the way it is. I gotta go."

John tried to move around her, but she stopped him again. Her eyes were back to pleading. John couldn't believe how quickly this conversation kept turning; it was getting hard to keep up. All sorts of emotions were cursing through him when all he wanted was to feeling nothing.

"John-"

"Alyssa, please." He looked her straight in the eye. "At least let one of us be honest: you broke my heart, and I don't want anything to do with it anymore."

John then successfully got around her. He slipped into his room so fast, he didn't notice how quick Alyssa broke right back down.

Alyssa found herself in tears later again that night. Whenever she was alone, like right now in her hotel room, she was in shambles. Without John, it was impossible to not slip away in her sorrows. It's like she had the winning ticket to the lottery and then she lost it. Except with this, she lost something way more valuable than cash. She lost the only true love she ever had.

"I just don't wanna fuck this up so…I'm going a little slow."

John's words began to haunt her.

"You're the only one I don't mind walking in silence with. We don't have to talk to make time worth it."

He was right: they didn't have to talk to make time worth it. They didn't have to do anything. As long as they were together, that was all that mattered.

"If you feel uncomfortable with us being a secret, just let me know. I'll go tell the whole world right now."

But damn it, why? Why didn't they tell the whole world?

"Don't hesitate with every step you take. I'm not gonna let you fall."

And that was it: Alyssa never hesitated with John. She had these predisposed beliefs that whatever happened, he would still be there.

"Good, bad, rich, poor, I'll take it all. I want you, Alyssa, every single bit of you."

And how about the bit of her who kept a secret from him? Was that the exception? Every single bit of her was shattered to pieces now.

"If we really are gonna build this future together, we have to know these things to better understand each other."

But there was no future now, was there?

An involuntary sob escaped Alyssa's throat and more memories of them came flittering in her head: that first night when he hugged her in Randy's balcony, being his date at the Hall of Fame and how he tried everything to tame her nerves, the day he flew back from Australia to visit her, making love to him the first and second time, his dimples and the way he would always hold her and tell her that everything would be alright.

But everything would not be alright. She had lost John, and he didn't want her anymore.

Alyssa was so immersed in her sobs, she almost didn't hear the vigorous knocking on her door. She hurriedly brushed the tears off her face in the hopes that John would show up. That John would take her back. She got on her feet and opened the door.

"Please give me a chance-"

Alyssa nearly slammed the door back shut, but the man in front of her halted it. How the hell did he find her, anyway?

"Please, Al. Let me fix this." Randy pleaded.

"You can't! Okay, you can't!" Alyssa couldn't hold back the tears. There was no way Randy could bring John back to her.

If John didn't even want to listen to her, if he didn't even want to give her the chance, what more with Randy? She was in a losing battle. The world was slipping away and the emptiness inside her expanded.

John was really gone. He'd given up on her.

Randy was suddenly at her side, pulling her into a hug. She didn't even care anymore. The worst had come, and what Randy had done- the raping and the lying- melted into insignificance now. She just wanted to curl up in a ball and cry. Her sobs muffled against Randy's shirt, and the warmth she felt from his touch offered no valid solace at all.

Outside, stood John. He wanted to kick himself for being surprised by what he saw. He actually thought Alyssa would be alone. But of course, just like it'd been this whole time, Randy was right there with her.