Neverland
Chapter Summary
Leonard froze when he saw Kirk's eyes move down from his face, over his body before back upwards, fixating on his lips for a moment. Kirk smirked. "Do your fucking job."
Star date: 2261.146
A Solitary Cell Whose Walls Are Mirrors
Book One: No Reflection
Chapter Eight: Neverland
Leonard did not want to beam down. The Captain's insistence on it made him want to do it even less. He stood on the transporter pad, adjusting his equipment and hoping that it would all be over quickly.
The Captain gave the order and he barely had time to look around before he felt it, the strong hands grabbing his arm then the sharp pain of teeth biting into the flesh of his shoulder.
A flash of phaser fire and it was all over, even as Leonard was left reeling in pain.
Leonard checked his shoulder, grimacing. The skin was broken but he didn't have a chunk missing, just a crescent of bloodied teeth marks that stained his shirt purple. The man lay at his feet, dead, but with traces of foam around his mouth that indicated he was in some way rabid.
Leonard ran the dermal regenerator over the wound and gave himself the standard shots against human infections before he knelt down to examine the body.
Kirk crouched next to him.
"What's the diagnosis Doctor?" he asked, glancing at Leonard's shoulder once before turning back to the corpse. His phaser was still in his hands, set firmly on 'kill' rather than the 'agoniser' setting. Leonard ran his tricorder over the man's body. The readings were like nothing he'd ever seen.
"No idea, sir," he replied. He turned the tricorder to himself, waiting for it to give the readings. If he'd caught what this man had… Kirk was watching him carefully and Leonard wondered how quick his execution would be if he showed signs of infection.
A rustling in the nearby undergrowth caught Kirk's attention, however. Leonard ducked out of the way just in time as Kirk began firing. He glanced over his shoulder in time to see their would-be attacker dodging away.
Leonard reacted on instinct, his body moving so that it collided with Kirk's, sending them both tumbling over onto the ground. He could feel the hard muscle, coiled and quivering with adrenaline, beneath him for a moment before Kirk threw him off with a snarl. Leonard ignored him though, getting to his feet.
The girl came out of the bushes hesitantly, like a startled animal. She had dark hair that was matted and tangled with twigs and dirt smeared across her cheeks. She looked at Leonard for a long time, before dismissing him and turning instead to Kirk.
"I am Miri… Are you grown-ups?"
Leonard turned to scoop up his tricorder, glancing down at it and quickly clearing the screen.
It had read 'infected'.
Miri had explained the situation as best she could, her eyes filled with fear and adoration the whole time. Her instant infatuation with Kirk was creepy, but Leonard ignored it in favour of trying to glean as much information from her as he could about the disease that had swept through the adult population.
The disease was spreading through his own system quickly, but he couldn't allow any symptoms to show. He knew that if Kirk found out, he'd be murdered instantly, and he couldn't find a cure if he was dead.
"McCoy," Kirk said as he stood. He nodded his head towards a spot a few feet away and McCoy got to his feet, following the Captain. They were still close to Miri, close enough she could probably hear what they were saying if she strained her ears, but McCoy was glad that they weren't letting her out of their sight. He didn't trust her.
He didn't trust anyone who automatically found someone like James Kirk attractive.
"From what she's said, we're all infected already just by being down here," Kirk said. McCoy nodded slowly. He raised his hypospray and tricorder so that Kirk could see it.
"The progression of the disease should be slow enough that I have enough time to develop a cure," he said, gesturing to the way the tricorder was filtering through hundreds of medical databases to create the exact composition that was needed to combat the illness. "Once it's ready, we can send the data up to M'Benga and he can use the transporter to send us down the cure."
Kirk nodded. "How long?" he asked. McCoy bit his lip. Probably more time than he could hide his own symptoms.
"A day?" he estimated. Kirk glanced over his shoulder at Miri.
"Faster than that," Kirk ordered. McCoy growled under his breath.
"Just what kind of miracle do you expect me to perform, Kirk? I can only go as fast as the goddamn research pops in and even then, not even the Enterprise can vaccinate against diseases it hasn't discovered yet!" he protested. Kirk grabbed him by the shirt collar, pulling him in so close that McCoy could see the tiny blood vessels in the corners of his eyes and feel the hot breath on his face.
"You've got 8 hours, McCoy," he said. Leonard froze when he saw Kirk's eyes move down from his face, over his body before back upwards, fixating on his lips for a moment. Kirk smirked. "Do your fucking job."
Leonard staggered backwards as he was let go. He adjusted the front of his uniform, ignoring the appreciative looks that Kirk was giving him as he returned to Miri. When he looked at her, he could see she was watching him with narrowed, jealous eyes.
The girl was a freak, Leonard decided, and he wished he'd let Jim shoot her.
6 hours and 47 minutes had passed when McCoy got his breakthrough. He sent the data up to M'benga and waited for the man to produce the vaccine that would keep them alive. Kirk had taken to teaching Miri how to shoot in the time they'd been there, using something that looked like a Terran rabbit as practice.
He leaned back against a tree as he watched. He was far enough out of range that he couldn't hear what was being said, nor did he want to. As long as he knew where Kirk was though, he was happy. He wasn't eager to have an enemy at his back.
He began to cough and put his hand to his mouth, drawing it away to see blood-specked foam across his palm. He wiped it on his uniform, knowing he was going to have to go through decontamination procedures anyway if he lived to see the Enterprise again. When he looked up again, Kirk had Miri grasped by the neck at arms-length.
Sensing a need to intervene before Kirk killed the girl and their only source of information on the disease, Leonard made his way over.
"-a disgusting little urchin like you?" Kirk was saying. Leonard raised an eyebrow.
"I'm the leader here! Not an urchin! I could have you killed in seconds if you don't do as I say!" Miri was hissing in response. Leonard folded his arms.
"Captain?" he prompted. Kirk turned his gaze to him briefly, before he threw Miri to the ground. She sprawled there.
"How goes the cure, McCoy?" he asked. Miri was on her feet, cheeks red with anger.
"I see how it is! You want to fuck this… infected! He's going to die, you know! He's probably got an hour tops! He's been coughing up blood all day!" she spat. Leonard felt his whole body go cold as Kirk turned to him, eyes suspicious.
"McCoy?" he prompted. Leonard shrugged.
"The cure is on its way," he replied. Kirk stepped forward again.
"Not the cure, McCoy. What's the stage of your infection?" Kirk's voice was low, the dangerous kind of low that McCoy had only heard before being disciplined. He didn't take a step backwards though, meeting Kirk's eyes.
"Critical. My organs will start to shut down or I may go rabid soon," he conceded. Kirk opened his mouth to say something but then McCoy felt hot everywhere, every nerve ending on fire.
He opened his mouth to try to scream but his jaw muscles were spasming so much he couldn't even draw breath. He saw Kirk's startled expression harden into something else before darkness passed over his vision.
He must be dying, he figured, and of all the ways to go, this one felt like the agoniser.
When Leonard awoke he was in the Medbay, strapped to a bed and on an IV. His vision was tinged red. He turned to look to the side and, with great effort, snagged his diagnostics report from the side.
Critical organ failure. Temporary blindness. There had been brain haemorrhaging at one point. As he went down the list he realised that it was more luck than skill that he was alive. At the bottom there was a minor notation: central nervous system in shock from shot from agoniser set to maximum.
"McCoy."
Leonard looked up. In the red haze of his vision, Kirk looked terrifying. He stalked forward, snatching the PADD from Leonard's hands and putting it to one side.
"What happened?" Leonard asked, his head hurting and feeling too vulnerable to be laying down with Kirk towering over him. Kirk looked him over, appearing to assess his usefulness.
"Miri attacked you. The cure came. I administered it to all staff and we beamed aboard. M'Benga then saved your life, though I had to put Chekov in the ward to make sure he didn't pull anything funny," Kirk explained, his voice low and monotone. Leonard frowned.
"You saved me? Why?" he asked. He knew Kirk wanted a piece of his ass, but there were other crewman. Kirk didn't answer, however, he just leaned down. Leonard couldn't escape as Kirk's hand grasped his jaw.
"You're not allowed to fucking die until I say so, that's why McCoy. Are we clear on that?" he asked. Leonard swallowed. Was this Kirk's way of showing worry for him?
"Yes sir," he said. Kirk seemed satisfied at that and turned on his heel to walk out. Sure as anything, Chekov appeared a moment later, his cheerful smile seeming strange.
"Doctor McCoy! I am being wery glad that you are recowering!" he chirped. Leonard nodded, knowing that at least with Chekov he wasn't likely to be killed by anyone else. Chekov sat on the edge of his bed, smiling from ear to ear.
"You missed a wery good show though McCoy! The Captain killed that girl in such interesting ways! And then we got to irradiate the whole planet!" he said, clapping his hands in almost childish delight. "It has been a long time since I got to use that particular weaponry."
Leonard felt his stomach roil, but he didn't say anything in response. Kirk had killed the girl, killed the whole planet… Yet had saved him. Repeatedly saved him, made exceptions for him, supported him against others who sought to assassinate him.
Could it be that he'd found James Tiberius Kirk's weakness? And that weakness was Leonard himself?
In the Style of Doctor Vannacutt
Chapter Summary
"We are more likely to survive with the devil we know." (1x10 The Dagger of the Mind).
Star date: 2261.153
A Solitary Cell Whose Walls Are Mirrors
Book One: No Reflection
Chapter Eight : In The Style of Doctor Vannacutt
Leonard frowned. There was something up with the crew. Since the incident with Miri, Leonard knew that the crew had started to push boundaries they never previously would have. He'd had to dispatch one assassin who thought it would be a good idea to try to weaken the Captain by taking him out already that week, and then there was the way that Spock was eyeing Kirk, as though waiting for him to slip up.
They had been orbiting Tantalus for 16 hours, and Leonard couldn't help but feel curious about why a supply drop is taking as long as it was. He was pretty sure that he was the last to know, because Uhura was looking particularly triumphant and Sulu looked downright pleased. Only Chekov seemed to be in a less than buoyant mood, and Leonard could only conceive that something had happened to Kirk.
He managed to catch Chekov when the man came off shift and pressed the information out of him. Chekov was eager to help. His cherub curls bouncing as he nodded enthusiastically, spilling all the details.
Kirk had transported down to Tantalus as routine. Once there he had met with a Doctor Van Gelder, who had taken the supplies. It was then that the coup d'etat had started. It seemed that Van Gelder had been part of another faction back in the Emperor's courts, and that someone there had needed the precocious Kirk out of the way. The rumour was Kirk was still alive, though for how long, Chekov couldn't guess.
"What's Spock's orders now? Are we leaving him down there?" Leonard asked. He didn't know what to think. Kirk being off the vessel is the best thing that could happen in his future, and yet when it came down to it, he could feel it in his gut that it wasn't right. Kirk was cruel and vindictive and incredibly violent, but he also was intelligent and had a healthy respect for usefulness. There were worse captains to serve under.
Leonard had no desire to serve under another captain. Not when he'd just got used to the psychosis of the one he'd got.
"Spock seems to be of two minds, sir," Chekov said, shrugging his shoulders. "I am thinking that he is wanting to leave Kirk there, but he is making sure of certain political realities first."
Leonard nodded slowly. Spock had to be more careful than most in the moves that he made. His half-breed status was enough to make sure his every move was scrutinised. Leonard didn't envy him at all.
"What is Van Gelder doing?" Leonard asked. Chekov's expression darkened for a moment and he looked away.
"He is extracting information," Chekov said. Leonard waited for him to expand. Chekov folded his arms. "He is using a machine to pillage the Captain's mind, sir. He is ripping his thoughts and memories out by force."
Leonard shuddered. They had all dealt with physical pain. They were accustomed to it from being children. Even mind games were considered fair game, if you could twist someone's thoughts it was their fault for being weak of mind. But telepathy, empathy, ESP, anything that messed within someone's mind? That was wrong. It was against unspoken rules.
"Chekov, I'm going to need you to hack something…" Leonard said. Chekov looked at him interestedly and followed, listening to McCoy's quiet schemes with interest.
"Doctor McCoy, I did not expect to see you waiting for me in here," Spock said calmly as the door to his quarters shut behind him. Leonard looked up from the scalpel in his hand, making sure the light caught on the sharp steel blade.
"I've been told you want some help making up your mind on a current dilemma and thought hat as the CMO of the ship, I would offer my advice as a kindly counsellor," he said, allowing a smile to stretch across his face.
He knew he was dead without doubt if Spock actually went for him. The Vulcan was so much stronger than he was. But he was armed with more than his agoniser, and Spock was not. Plus there was the weight of the McCoy name, less powerful than it had been, but still more powerful than Spock's mixed heritage. Spock would have to be careful.
"You had advice on the Captain's kidnapping?" Spock asked, his tone lightly inquisitive. "I thought you, of all people, Doctor, would not care much about the fate of Captain James Tiberius Kirk."
Leonard smiled again, twirling the scalpel between his fingers easily. Spock's eyes followed it, watching the play of light over it even as Leonard walked towards him.
"You see, that's where we're having a lack of communication. I may not like Kirk, but I'm used to him. The way I see it, while he's in charge, you and me have a decent thing going. No other Captain is going to let you serve as a First Officer, and no other Captain is going to give as much of a rat's ass about a CMO as Kirk does. We are more likely to survive with the devil we know," Leonard stated. He brought the scalpel to a stop and Spock's eyes were transfixed on it a moment more before they rose to his face.
"You say this, and yet you have been threatened by the Captain many times. He has made personal attempts to endanger your safety and humiliate you in public," Spock reminded him. Leonard forced the smile to stick on his face. He knew that, he knew that Kirk was not a good person, was not good to them but the fact of the matter was that there were people who could be worse.
"Save him or don't, but let it be known that the McCoys have thrown their lot in with the Kirks. I would suggest that your family does the same. Because if James Kirk lives, and finds out that you abandoned him, he's going to find each and every one of us, and he's going to skin us alive," Leonard said. With that warning he left, feeling all the adrenaline leave him in a rush.
He nearly ran back to his quarters, barricading the door just in case Spock decided he didn't want that kind of insolence on his ship after all and sent someone after him. He then waited.
He was called on duty two hours later with an emergency alert. Once he got to Medbay, he saw why.
Kirk had thrown M'Benga aside and was grappling with Chapel, squeezing her throat so hard that her face was turning blue tinged. Other medical officers were hanging back, not sure how to proceed.
"We rescued the Captain, McCoy. It's up to you to make sure that the Captain is fit for duty."
McCoy turned and saw Spock stood there, face impassive. He smirked and stepped into the room.
Kirk's eyes immediately sensed the movement. He let Chapel go and she sagged to her knees, rubbing her throat and coughing.
"What's going on here?" Leonard asked. Kirk opened his mouth a few times before he firmly closed it. Leonard guessed there was no way that they were going to get anywhere with an audience. Kirk had been subjected to torture of the mind, and that kind of thing left you potentially weak. A weakness he would not admit to in front of everyone else.
"Everyone, get out," McCoy ordered. The rank and file all left. Finally Spock turned on his heel, making a point of leaving last to emphasise the fact that he did not need to follow McCoy's orders, but just at this point he would.
"Captain, lay down before you fall over," Leonard said. Kirk snarled at him, and Leonard wondered if he'd lost the power of speech. It wasn't unusual for something like that to happen, especially with some of the mind-sifting devices that were available.
"I won't hurt you… God knows I've got reason to, but I won't. A life for a life," McCoy said, keeping his voice steady and calm. Kirk was watching him with the eyes of a predator, coiled and ready to strike. Leonard made sure to keep his hands where the other could see them. "I told Spock to get you out. Figured it's better to have you than some asshole like Sulu. So do as I ask and lay the fuck down."
Kirk glanced at the bed and then the fight seemed to leave him all at once. Leonard had never seen Kirk look so tired and humbled. He walked to the bed and laid on it, throwing his arm over his eyes in a move that obscured his vision. McCoy wondered what he'd done to be considered worth trusting that much.
"Captain, the only way to get over something like this is rest. Sleep fixes broken minds," Leonard said, as he walked over to the cabinet to get sedatives. "I'm going to put you out for about 16 hours. Myself and Chekov will watch over you in shifts while you rest. Maybe Spock too if you trust him enough."
Kirk didn't move or show any sign he'd heard. Leonard walked back with the hypospray, loaded and ready to go. Kirk didn't flinch when the shot was administered.
"Once you've rested and processed it, you'll be yourself again in all your asshole glory," McCoy tried to joke. Kirk did lower his arm then, and Leonard could see that the eyes that usually held the cold fury of a dying star instead were hollowed out. Deadened.
"They took apart my mind, McCoy. Piece by piece, memory by memory. All the bad moments, all the pain, experienced over and over again for their amusement…" Kirk whispered, as though admitting that weakness would damn him forever. Leonard swallowed.
He'd forgotten Kirk was human, forgotten that there was a man inside there, behind the shark smirk and the bloodied knuckles.
"You survived 'em once, kid. You can survive 'em again," McCoy replied. Kirk looked at him, startled.
"I did a terrible thing to you, McCoy. I wish I could have made it right…" Kirk said, his sentence ending in a yawn.
"I'm going to assume this is drugs talking, Captain, and suggest you don't say anythin' else. I don't want to hear it. There are some things we just don't need to talk about," Leonard said. Kirk had reminded him of that sexual assault, but at the moment when Leonard looked at him, he remembered Jim, guileless and gentle.
The man that James Kirk could have been, if he'd been allowed to reach his potential perhaps.
"You're right, McCoy… I just wish…"
Leonard didn't hear what Kirk wished for, because he was asleep.
He didn't know if he felt disappointment.
A Dangerous Game
Chapter Summary
McCoy watched Kirk go and wondered why he didn't feel relieved to see the Captain leaving.
Chapter Notes
Retelling of 'The Corbomite Maneuver'.
Star date: 2261.190
A Solitary Cell Whose Walls Are Mirrors
Book One: No Reflection
Chapter Ten : A Dangerous Game
Kirk was still beneath his hands as Leonard went through the medical examination. He could feel the tension just beneath Kirk's skin, the desire to pull away, but both of them knew that this was necessary. Kirk had spent the last month re-establishing control on his ship with tide after vicious tide of punishments.
They didn't speak of the Van Gelder incident. Kirk didn't seek him out on purpose any more. It was something that McCoy was grateful for, if not a little curious about. He guessed that Kirk felt it was better to have someone who had seen his weakness as far from him as possible unless McCoy got any ideas.
It was still a little unsettling if only because McCoy had been certain that he'd finally worked out Kirk's quirks and he was now being presented with a new side the Captain he couldn't fathom at all.
The notice for red alert sounded and McCoy glanced at Kirk. He knew that the Captain had seen it, but he didn't move from the examination table.
"You're right as rain again, Captain. Brain scans all normal. Or as normal as they were before in any case," McCoy said finally, switching off the tricorder and putting it down. Kirk nodded and sat up.
"Good," Kirk replied and swung his legs back over the side of the gurney. McCoy took a few steps back, allowing Kirk room to stand. He did so quickly, straightening out his uniform as he did so.
"Are you still experiencing headaches?" McCoy asked, picking up the PADD to add the notes to Kirk's file. Kirk shook his head.
"Everything's as it was before," he replied. McCoy paused from where he was typing his response. Everything wasn't as it was before. Yes, Kirk was once again feared and respected by his crew. Yes, Kirk's mind had solidified again from the mess it had been when he'd first come back weeks ago. Yes, the Enterprise was just what she'd been.
But things were different. McCoy could sense it. Something had shifted in Kirk's perspective, something had made it so that McCoy was no longer prey to be stalked and he wasn't sure why.
He wondered if it was something that had broken in Kirk's brain, or perhaps his psyche was different. He disguised his pause by placing the PADD down and pretending he was finished.
He didn't know why it bothered him so much that he was finally getting the peace to do his job.
"Captain! Commander Spock requests you urgently on the bridge!"
McCoy watched Kirk go and wondered why he didn't feel relieved to see the Captain leaving.
He decided to follow. He usually didn't spend much time on the bridge. He didn't like to have that many people behind his back, but his curiosity wouldn't be sated if he stayed hiding in Medbay for another month.
"Just blow the goddamn thing out of the sky," Kirk was ordering, looking at Spock like he was an idiot.
"It may be of use to us, Captain. I would also be unwise to fire on the vessel until we're sure about what we're dealing with," Spock cautioned. McCoy leaned against the wall, eager to have his back to something. Kirk had noticed him though, and he saw the Captain's mouth thin.
"Are you questioning my orders Commander?" Kirk asked pointedly. Spock's face didn't change, but McCoy felt the tension rise on the bridge. Uhura was watching the proceedings interestedly, her dark eyes flitting between Kirk and Spock.
"We need to fire on it now!"
McCoy was surprised to hear Bailey speak up. The man generally didn't say much when he was on shift, and compared to Chekov, the man was barely useful, but he was still a more skilled navigator than most. Still, he wasn't important enough that he should have been interrupting what Spock and Kirk were arguing about.
It appeared that Kirk thought that way too because he rounded on Bailey, eyes flashing with anger.
"Who the fuck do you think you're talking to, Bailey? Report to the Booth for insolence to a superior officer," Kirk growled. Bailey looked surprised, and McCoy thought he must have been an idiot to think that it was going to go any other way.
"I'm calling a department head meeting in 4 hours' time. Until then, Spock, you can do your scanning and experiments or whatever shit it is that makes you happy. If you can't tell me what it is by then though, we're going to destroy the thing."
McCoy had Bailey delivered to him an hour after he left the bridge. The man was twitching and groaning in phantom pain as the last effects of the Booth wore off. He vomited and sweated and cried, but after half an hour he went still.
It wasn't the worst case McCoy had seen, but it was still pretty extreme for a simple matter of speaking out of turn. He ran the scanner over Bailey's body, trying to work out if he could clear the man for duty any time soon. It seemed not. Bailey's whole nervous system seemed to be on fire.
"Of course I get the lovely Doctor looking after me… Kirk's little pet," Bailey slurred when he finally opened his eyes to see Leonard standing over him and adjusting the dials on the biobed. McCoy glanced down at him.
"You're lucky that you're getting medical treatment at all. Some Captains would order you to suffer through the aftermath as well," he pointed out. Bailey sneered.
"So Kirk sent me his lapdog to lick my wounds better, is that it? Well I've got plenty of things you can lick, McCoy," Bailey leered and McCoy scowled down at him. Had the navigator hit his head on something?
"You let every dig at you slide. You're fucking weak, Doctor. You would rather bend over and let Kirk fuck you than grow a spine," Bailey continued and Leonard gritted his teeth.
"I don't have to fuck the Captain in order to be useful aboard this ship," he replied. Bailey snorted with laughter.
"Useful? I forgot how you medical types think. But you should know, it's about who's stronger, McCoy. That's what will win out in the end. Who's got the biggest muscles," he said and he grabbed the front of McCoy's uniform.
McCoy didn't even think. Bailey was so beneath him it was laughable that he was even going to try something on him, even if he was feeling like lashing out over his unfair punishment. McCoy had his scalpel on him in milliseconds.
He'd only meant to press it to the skin, to make a point that he wasn't just useful but also dangerous, but Bailey saw the movement and tugged, sending Leonard off balance. The scalpel sliced deep and long down Bailey's torso, red welling up instantly from the slice.
McCoy stared as the blood began to pour down his side and then glanced up at Bailey's face. The other looked shocked, and then his face clouded in pain.
"McCoy! You motherfucker!"
McCoy backed away, scalpel in hand. M'Benga came over, curious as to what the shouting was about and McCoy quickly wiped the shock from his own face.
"M'Benga, you take over here. Seal him up again. Oh and strap him down, he seems to think that us Medbay staff are weaklings to be picked on," McCoy said. M'Benga's smile spread across his face in a slow, guiltless way as he walked up to the bed.
"Oh, I'll make sure he realises his mistake Doctor McCoy. But thanks for starting the work for me."
McCoy didn't expect Kirk to seek him out, but there the Captain was, standing outside his quarters. There was still an hour before the meeting where Kirk would make the decision about the strange, unidentified thing that was hovering just within view of the Enterprise.
"I heard that Bailey attacked you in Medbay," Kirk said. McCoy shrugged.
"It was nothing I couldn't handle," he replied. Kirk's expression shifted from impartiality towards something like amusement. He folded his arms.
"I heard you gutted him like a fish and left him to bleed out. I didn't think you had it in you McCoy. Threatening Spock, carving up crew members while they're still alive… Anyone would think you were trying to impress someone," he said taking a few steps forward and into McCoy's personal space.
Leonard was surprised how weird it felt for Kirk to be doing this again. In a way, it was more familiar than the estranged and distant Kirk he'd dealt with over the last month. A comforting kind of menace that made his heart thud hard in his chest with a fear he'd come to associate with his time on the Enterprise.
"I don't need to impress anyone aboard, sir," he replied, keeping his chin up even as Kirk moved even closer.
"You're right. You don't… We're allies now, McCoy. You and me. And one day, when the Court is mine, I'll remember a doctor who stood up for himself, but was loyal to me," Kirk's voice was quiet, so quiet that McCoy had to strain his own hearing just to make out the distinct words.
So that was Kirk's play. McCoy couldn't believe his ambition. He stared for a long moment, fear forgotten as he tried to work out how this upstart captain thought he was going to one day supplant the Emperor himself.
"I'm not a traitor, Kirk," McCoy hissed. Kirk chuckled, a hand resting on McCoy's shoulder for a moment.
"We're all traitors, McCoy, just some of us are more clever about who we betray than others. You've proved your loyalty to me. Now you just have to swear it," Kirk said softly, his voice like poison. Leonard snarled.
"So I stop a coup and carve up some guy you don't like and suddenly I'm in league in a rebellion? You're a captain. You have no power to do what you're promising," Leonard spat. "And you're endangering us all if you even talk about it. I want nothing to do with your plan Kirk."
Kirk smirked and leaned forward. McCoy had to jerk his head backwards to be able to keep Kirk's face in focus.
"Power isn't about who has the biggest muscles, McCoy, it's about who's clever and who's useful. You know this, you worked it out. Now use that brain of yours. Would you bet against me?" Kirk asked. Leonard swallowed, trying not to meet Kirk's eyes.
"Why would you even want to be Emperor anyway? It's drawing a target on your back and asking people to take pot shots at you three times a day," McCoy said, desperate to change the subject. Kirk laughed.
"Because I want to change things. Isn't that obvious?" he asked. McCoy scowled.
"Change what? If there was ever a man who fit into the way things are now, it's you," he growled. Kirk raised his eyebrows.
"I thought you knew me McCoy, but perhaps you don't know me as well as both of us think," he said. With that he left, leaving McCoy reeling with the knowledge.
He could go to the Emperor with the information now, tell him about Kirk's plans and hope that the Emperor wouldn't see him as complicit in them but something stopped him.
Perhaps it was foolish, but he wanted to know what it was that Kirk wanted to change. He had seen Kirk's potential, the things he could have been…
And maybe a future of that, for all that Leonard was afraid to support it… Maybe a future like that, wouldn't be so bad?
Neptune's Ocean
Chapter Summary
Will all great Neptune's ocean wash this blood Clean from my hand? No, this my hand will rather The multitudinous seas incarnadine, Making the green one red. (Macbeth, 61-64. William Shakespeare.)
Chapter Notes
The final chapter of this part of the story and a turning point for McCoy. This takes part during the episode 'The Conscience of the King'. I figured seeing as I'd written it all, I'd just complete it tonight.
Star date: 2261.219
A Solitary Cell Whose Walls Are Mirrors
Book One: No Reflection
Chapter Eleven : Neptune's Ocean
Will all great Neptune's ocean wash this blood
Clean from my hand? No, this my hand will rather
The multitudinous seas incarnadine,
Making the green one red.
(Macbeth, 61-64. William Shakespeare.)
"Report," Kirk barked. McCoy looked up from where he was sat. Kirk had been irritating in more ways than usual recently. Since revealing his plans to McCoy, even just the gist of them, he'd been hanging around Medbay more and more. McCoy had toyed with the idea that perhaps Kirk was worried that he might be betrayed.
Then he remembered that Kirk had been getting up in his personal space for almost a year now already and he hadn't known the plan then.
As it stood, McCoy was learning a lot about what went on in other parts of the ship just from overhearing Kirk's conversations through the comm system.
"Captain. You said that if I heard anything on the waves about T4 I was to come straight to you?" Uhura's voice came through the communicator with a strange urgency.
Up until that point Kirk had been lounging in McCoy's desk chair, his boots up on the desk as he threw an apple up and down, catching it and throwing it higher and higher, closer to dropping it each time. Now though, he sat up, his face immediately intent.
"You're sure?" Kirk asked. McCoy found his interest piqued. What was T4? And when had Uhura become close enough to Kirk that she would keep secrets for him?
"Yes sir. He's definitely on Planet Q," Uhura said and McCoy wondered who was? Surely Kirk wasn't tracking the Emperor's steps? There was no way a coup could be staged at this point. They'd all be killed.
"I'll be on the bridge as soon as I can. We're going to divert to Planet Q. Uhura you're going to be on the landing party with me. Brief Chekov and Spock to our mission parameters, you know what they are," he said before signing off the communicator. McCoy watched as Kirk began to strap various equipment back on.
Knives, phasers, agonising batons, an old-fashioned pistol. There was a small arsenal of weaponry attached to Kirk's person by the time he was done and McCoy felt a cold thrill of fear when Kirk met his eyes.
It was like looking in to the eyes of a wild beast on the hunt.
"Jim?"
He didn't even realise he'd used Kirk's first name until Kirk blinked slowly. He slinked around the desk and McCoy stayed where he was, frozen to the spot.
"I'm going to hunt something dangerous today, McCoy. Something that might leave me dead. So if you were holding back on me, now would be the time to admit to how much you wanted to fuck me," Kirk said. There was a twist to his lips that suggested he wasn't being serious, but McCoy swallowed in any case.
"I'm not fucking you now, kid. You're going to have to make sure you come back alive if you even want a chance of that ever happening," he said. Kirk let out a huff of air, almost a laugh, and reached forward, his thumb trailing over McCoy's lower lip.
"I'm going to execute a man today who I've been training to kill since I was a teenager. Kiss me good luck, McCoy," he ordered. Leonard could sense that there was something dangerous behind the order though. This wasn't Kirk throwing his weight around, this wasn't Kirk being his usual domineering self.
This was Kirk saying he didn't think he was going to come back.
Kirk's kiss was hardly romantic though. It was full of teeth and tongue and his hand gripped the back of Leonard's head so he couldn't pull away. Leonard let him do what he wanted, aware of the feel of the weapons pressed against his hips and abdomen.
Kirk finally pulled away and Leonard reached up to wipe his mouth. Kirk smirked and walked away without a backward glance.
McCoy waited until he was out of sight and then pulled up Kirk's file on his padd. What had happened when Kirk was a teenager that would coincide with-
"Ah."
"You cannot let him do this!"
McCoy didn't know why he was having this fighting match with Spock, but he wasn't going to let Kirk go down onto that planet and take on Kodos the fucking Executioner. From what Leonard had heard, Kirk didn't stand a chance and they were just letting him lead them on the path of insanity. Not to mention that Kodos was an advisor to the Emperor and responsible for a lot of the inner workings with supplies in the Empire.
Kodos wouldn't stop with just killing Kirk and his assassination team. He'd petition the Emperor to have the whole crew murdered. And the ex-governor of Tarsus IV could do that.
"I have no say on the matter, McCoy. If the Captain wishes to better himself with a high-profile assassination, I can merely advise him for or against the move. This particular one appears to have no direct benefit for the Captain, but then, I am not in tune with the Imperial politics that embroils the Kirk family," Spock replied. McCoy growled under his breath.
"Kodos is a piece of work, but Jim doesn't need to be the one to do this! He's going-"
"Spock, go ahead into the shuttle. I want to speak with McCoy."
Leonard turned to see Kirk stood there. He had desert gear over the top of his uniform, his hood up so his face wasn't immediately visible. McCoy stalked forward, standing mere feet away.
"This is insane! Nothing is worth taking on Kodos!" McCoy hissed. "You're going to get us all killed."
Kirk smiled. "Do you want to know why I'm after Kodos?" he asked. McCoy shifted his weight.
"Some stupid grudge-"
"The man murdered my brother. For no reason. He had nothing to gain from it. Just because he could," Kirk said. Leonard stared at him. He hadn't ever heard Kirk express regret over someone's life ending, and yet here he was,saying that he wanted to take down Kodos over a personal matter.
"He starved us. He humiliated us. He made us fight each other. We were so hungry, some of us started eating the ones who were either dead or too weak to fight back," Kirk continued, his face twisting into something dark and his upper lip curling. "Then one day he just pulled my brother out and shot him in the face."
Leonard took in Kirk's body language, the way he seemed to be vibrating with anger. The way his shoulders squared, his jaw clenched, his fists tightened. Kirk was really going to do this. He was going to go down there and avenge a brother that had been murdered and avenge his own pain at the hands of a madman.
"I'm coming along," McCoy said finally. Kirk stared at him for a moment.
"The minute you become a liability, Doctor, you will be beamed back aboard. I will not compromise this mission," Kirk said, stepping into the shuttle. McCoy watched his back for a moment, realising that he'd been watching Kirk's back more and more recently and in more ways than just figuratively.
McCoy watched as Uhura and Spock took out the guards. Chekov had already taken out the daughter, who was lying in a pool of her own blood at the bottom of the steps. He should have felt disgusted by the killing, but instead all he felt was that these people had got their just desserts.
Kodos' palace on Planet Q was extravagant and McCoy guessed that most of his wealth came from his time on Tarsus IV, starving the population and creaming the profits of good harvests off the top. Until the harvest failed and he had to move planets. Though not before making sure that the population of the planet wouldn't survive to make money off the business venture without him.
He couldn't help but root for Kirk.
He crept up the steps towards Kodos' office. Kirk was already at the top of the steps and Uhura and Spock were listening to his orders raptly. Chekov appeared from around a corner, smiling and covered in blood. He looked like he'd been rolling in it.
"Someone needs to teach you finesse kid," McCoy commented. Chekov just smiled back.
"You will wait outside until one of us comes out. If it's not me, then by all means, shoot the bastard in the face," Kirk said. Spock and Uhura nodded. Kirk slipped into the room then, leaving them all waiting and hoping that the next patrol wouldn't come while they were stood there.
Uhura began to pick under her nails with a knife, leaning against the wall as though she didn't have a care in the world. A bruise was forming across her cheek and blood had dripped down her chin from a split lip.
"Why are you helping out?" McCoy asked, unable to hold back the question. "I can understand Spock and Chekov, even myself, but I never had you pegged for a Kirk fan."
Uhura looked up at him and smiled, her teeth stained with blood. "I have an interest in getting Kirk what he wants in this case. Kodos is in the way of a particularly good promotion for my father. Not to mention, if there's anyone who can get this job done, Kirk is the one who could do it."
McCoy nodded to show he'd accepted the answer, he didn't think he was the whole truth though. Uhura was strong in her own right, and there were less messy ways to get someone out of the way. Uhura's family specialised in less direct methods usually. He wondered if there was something else tying her to Kirk.
Minutes passed and they began to feel like hours. Leonard began to pace, getting concerned that they would be found before they had the opportunity to complete their mission and escape.
"The Keptin is taking a long time," Chekov whispered to him. Leonard nodded and glanced toward the closed door.
"I'm going in," he announced finally. Uhura glanced up but then continued picking at her nails.
"It is in direct violation of our orders," Spock reminded him. McCoy shrugged.
"If Kirk's failed, Kodos might be sat in there waiting for someone to come with back-up. We'll be sitting ducks," he reasoned. He almost convinced himself that was the reason he was doing it as well, but he knew deep down that he wasn't.
Goddamnit, when had he started to worry about Kirk?!
He pushed the door open and the sound of something hitting flesh met his ears. The room was dark, the curtains pulled against the bright sun. A single beam of light got through a gap in the curtains, illuminating the scene before him.
The desk had been overturned, PADDs and trinkets scattered around the room. Blood was spattered liberally over many of the surfaces and McCoy followed the trail over to the bright spot in the centre of the room.
Kirk had straddled Kodos, the larger and more powerful man trapped beneath him. In his hands, Kirk was holding a statue of some renaissance figure. It looked to be made from marble. McCoy watched as Kirk brought it above his head and then brought it down. Over and over and over, until Kodos' skull caved in.
And still Kirk didn't stop.
McCoy moved forward. He didn't know what possessed him to do it but he was crouching beside Jim, trying to ignore the splatter of brain matter and bits of skull on the carpet. He put his hand on Kirk's wrist as the captain lifted his arm again.
Kirk turned to him, eyes wild and surprised before they seemed to clear. He looked down at Kodos, as though seeing what he'd done for the first time, and then dropped the statue to the side. He wiped his hands on his trousers.
"He's dead," Kirk said, as though McCoy wouldn't have been able to tell that just by looking. McCoy nodded though, rising to his feet and pulling Kirk up with him. The other seemed unsteady on his feet for a moment before he straightened himself up to his full height.
McCoy watched as Kirk walked to the large windows that took up an entire wall of the office and, with a flourish, he pushed the curtains aside. Light flooded the scene, the red standing out like a garish painting against the lavish furnishings of the office.
Kirk turned then, the sun shining from behind him and giving the impression of a halo around his golden hair. McCoy could see the blood staining his sleeves, the front of his shirt, his trousers, but there wasn't a single injury on Kirk himself. His piercing blue eyes clear, his face stern and serious as McCoy had ever seen it.
"You asked me what I wanted to change. You said I fit into this world better than anyone else. But what I want to change is this world. I want people like Kodos to be gutted alive, and I want people like me to no longer be a necessity. I'm not a good man, but I want there to be an Empire where a good man can make a difference. I want the Empire to be better. Join me, McCoy. Let's take on the Galaxy together," Kirk said and McCoy could hear the conviction in his voice. And in that moment, he realised that he believed that Kirk could actually do it. That James Tiberius Kirk could take on the whole galaxy and win. That the Emperor would fall and Kirk would be the man who stood over his corpse.
He didn't think as he dropped to his knees and placed a hand over his heart. It was an old gesture, but the McCoys were old-fashioned. When they pledged their allegiance, it wasn't fleeting or fanciful. It was sincere, unswerving loyalty. He made sure his eyes met Kirk's as he clenched his hand into a fist.
"Lead, and I'll follow," he replied. Kirk's smile stretched across his face and he stepped forward, reaching out a hand to help Leonard up. The sun from behind him was almost blinding at that point and McCoy felt it was almost surreal.
He stared at the blood-stained, outstretched hand before reaching to take it. Kirk's fingers closed around his own like a noose and the deal was struck.
Leonard McCoy and James Kirk were officially allies.
A Solitary Cell Whose Walls Are Mirrors
Book One: No Reflection
Complete
To be continued in 'The Veiled Reflection'