Chapter Forty-Four: Human
Woken up like an animal I'm all ready for healing
My mind's lost with nightmares streaming
Woken up, kicking and screaming)
Take me out of this place I'm in
Break me out of this shell-like case I'm in
Underneath the skin there's a human
Buried deep within there's a human
And despite everything I'm still human
~Daughter
Nilin took the steps downstairs slowly. She could hear the buzz of other voices and dreaded actually having to talk to them. She just wanted to curl up and go to sleep. With the thought of that, a yawn forced its way past her lips. She caught Damon starring at her from the corner of her eye and redness flushed over her cheeks as she went into the family room.
Jenna, Alaric and Mildred stood with a group of people. It looked like Carol Forbes, the sheriff and Caroline's mother, Piper Denison, owner of Mystic Grill also one of Jenna's friends and Ryan Shades, a lawyer that had worked with Nilly's father.
Damon walked ahead of her, shaking Alaric's hand, both strangely eyeing each other. He took Jenna and, bowing his head, kissed the top of it, murmuring condolences to all of them. Nilly came up to Mildred and hugged her.
"Hey, peaches," she said while squeezing Nilly. She nodded an acknowledgement to the Sheriff and Piper and got a bone crushing bear hug from an obviously tipsy Mr. Shades. They talked, well everyone but Nilly talked. She watched Damon the whole time as he easily made conversation. When he wasn't talking, his eyes flashed over to Nilly, a quick smile coming to his lips.
Just then someone came up behind her and grabbed her shoulder. She turned to find Elena behind her, glaring at Damon. She whispered in Nilly's ear, "Can I talk to you?" Nilly turned back to the group and excused herself following Elena out the front door and on to the porch.
Nilly rolled her eyes when she saw Stefan and Bonnie sitting out there. Not again. "Really?" she scoffed as Elena closed the door and went to stand by Stefan. "What else is there to tell me? Hmm?"
Bonnie stepped forwards from the railing she was leaning on. "I'm just heading out and wanted to say goodbye," she explained coming over and hugging Nilly. "I'm sorry you've had to lose so much and even though I don't trust Damon one bit, I trust you." Bonnie said, her dark arms wrapping around Nilin.
Nilly gave a sad smile and nodded. "Thank you, Bonnie," was all she said. Bonnie squeezed Nilly's hand before stepping down the porch and making her way to her car.
Nilly turned back to Stefan and Elena, knowing that they hand no intention of leaving. "Just hear us out." Elena started. Nilly sighed and boosted herself up on top of the railing. She raised her eyebrows at them and motioned for them to continue. Stefan came over with his head down.
He looked up at her and said, "I'm sorry if our intentions earlier appeared to be for the wrong reasons. I want you to understand we're just trying to stop history from repeating itself."
"I get that you're trying to help me, I do. And I'm not even angry that you told me those things, though I wish that you'd given Damon the chance to tell me himself, but this is my life." Nilly pushed.
"Nilly, you haven't known him as long as I have." Elena said, coming over by Stefan.
"You're right, I haven't," was her only reply.
"So shouldn't you take our word over his? My word over his?" Elena asked accusingly.
Nilin slid off the banister. "I never doubted you're word. I never said you were wrong about him, Elena."
"Then why can't you see that he's dangerous?" she nearly shouted.
"He is dangerous!" Nilin yelled. "Given anyone the chance and they are dangerous, but I'm taking that risk Elena and you can't stop me." Nilly told her. "There's something about him that I just can't shake and I'm asking you two that if you really care about me you need to trust me," she continued softly.
"You can't be serious Nilin! You look like Katherine, he's in love with Katherine! Can't you see what he's doing?" Elena shouted.
Nilly crossed her arms and calmly replied, "You look like Katherine, Stefan loved her."
"Key word is 'loved'. ED, past tense." Elena said. Nilly shook her head, walking to the other side of the porch, taking a spot between the front door and kitchen window.
"See Nilly, the difference is I realized a long time ago Katherine's love was compelled. It was never true and I've tried on several occasions to get my brother to see that." Stefan spoke up. "But he thinks it was real, he doesn't realize how manipulative Katherine was."
Nilly scoffed, "I think he realizes it now. I mean she deceived you all by making you think she was in that tomb for a hundred plus years."
Elena was shaking her head at Nilly, her eyes glaring. This wasn't happening, today of all days they were not arguing over this. "Elena, please. It's been a long day and I can't be fighting you on this. This is something you need to trust me on."
"Say I trust, then what?" she asked. "How long do I wait for your body to show up in a morgue. Or worse, you end up like one of them?"
Nilin was taken back by the venom in her sister's voice. Any other day her stubborn nature would take over and she'd stand toe and toe with Elena, but instead she decided to take the coward's way out and surrender.
She shook her head and went to turn to open the front door. Before she could grabbed the door knob it swung open, revealing a bored looking Damon. Nilly stepped back in surprise as he stepped out on to the porch. So much for retreating.
"Sorry to interrupt your little pow-wow, I was just leaving. Is this evening's topic still about me?" he smirked, standing in front of his brother.
"Not everything's about you Damon." Elena sneered.
Nilly created some distance between herself and the rest of them by wandering back to the railing. Comfortably leaning on it, she watched as Stefan and Damon sized each other up.
"I'll take that as a 'yes' then." Damon retorted. He brushed passed Stefan, clipping him in the shoulder roughly and took up the same position as Nilly, only on the other side of the steps. "You know I'm getting really tired of your sneakiness, little brother," he continued, crossing his arms over his chest.
"Maybe I wouldn't have to be sneaky if you just listened the first time I told you to leave Nilly and Elena alone." Stefan shot back, turning to face his brother again.
Damon grinned, "And what fun would that have been?"
Nilly was slightly frightened by the look that came over Stefan's face. His usually passive features were murderous. "Why don't you just admit it Damon, Katherine doesn't want you. She left you in the dust like countless others, so you're going for her double." Stefan pushed.
Nilin's eyes widened. She was slightly offended. She looked down quickly wrapping her arms around herself. Was that really what the brothers thought of her?
"You'd love it if I did, wouldn't you?" Damon sneered. "You'd love to see me screw up."
Stefan took a step towards Damon, who matched it with one of his own. "You can play this little game of pretend all you want, Damon." Stefan said. "She'll see through your phoniness eventually, and then you'll be all by yourself again. She'll leave you just like Katherine did."
Nilly saw a very disturbing twinkle in Damon's eyes as his shoulder tensed. Without thinking, she stepped in between the two seething vampires. Placing a hand on each of their chest, she used all her strength to push them back. It was useless. They didn't budge, but both of their venomous stares broke to look down at her.
"Stop!" she yelled. "This isn't fair to me." Nilly looked between the two of them. "There was a funeral today, for god sake. I can't be worried about this right now! God, you're making me feel like Katherine too!" She shouted, pushing them harder. Neither moved, they were looking down at her.
"I have a house in my name I need to deal with in another town, filled with a ton of my dad's crap. I have to figure out what to do with his car, his bills. I need to find a job and a place to live now. I need to finish freakin' High School before I can think of anything else. I can't do this right now." Nilly breathed out, feeling slightly woozy. Final Damon and Stefan backed up, allowing Nilly to drop her hands. They hung stiff at her side.
"This isn't fair to me," she said again. They were all quiet, three pairs of eyes on her. Finally Nilly felt that last brick crumple as her shoulder slumped. She was too tired to keep the blank wall up, it was too much to fight the numbness anymore. "Please, just stop all of this," she begged.
No one answered her. Damon took a step back though, his eyes watching her closely before he turned his back and hopped down the steps without saying a word. He stopped and looked back at her for a moment, a grin on his face. "Want to come?" he repeated Nilin's words from before. She gave him a sad lop-sided smile.
"She's not going anywhere with you," Elena said, finding her voice again.
Nilin turned back to her. "Elena," she said softly.
"If you go with him, how do I know you'll come back?" she asked, her voice breaking and eyes starting to water.
Nilin crossed the distance between her and her sister. She wrapped her arms around Elena. "You have to trust me," she repeated again. The she stepped back from her.
Elena's face was set, the only emotion were in her wet eyes. "Don't go with him, Nil."
Nilin didn't say anything, she stepped down the stairs. As she walked to Damon, Nilin looked back over her shoulder at Elena, who was watching her. Too many emotions flashed on her face to let Nilly know how she was feeling. Stefan had his eyes burning into Damon and with one last glance Nilly swallowed hard and followed Damon to his Camaro.
He watched her from the corner of his eye, feeling as if he'd just won a battle. Nilin sat in his passenger seat, pulling at her dress. He watched with a perplexed adornment. There was something about her that affected him and Damon couldn't figure out what. It was slightly unnerving, but what could he say, she was addictive.
From all the events that had unfolded, Damon would be lying if he said he wasn't shocked she was willingly leaving with him. He couldn't help but become a little smug... and paranoid.
Nilly rested back in the seat as she flopped her head towards him. "So where are we going?" she asked.
He grinned as he drove through the night. Oh, she was so innocent. "Where would you like to go, Miss Daisy?" he posed, lifting his eyebrow.
Nilin rolled her eyes at him and his reference. She couldn't answer though because her lips were preoccupied by the yawn that went through them. He started to laugh.
"Don't laugh at my exhaustion," she told him, gently rubbing her eyes.
He just shook his head, a smile still on his lips. "To the boarding house it is," Damon grinned. "For some much needed sleep," he winked at her. Again, Nilin rolled her eyes at him before leaning her head back on the seat, exposing her bare neck.
Damon ripped his eyes away from her creamy skin when he felt the pain in his gums. He swallowed hard, trying to focus on the road again. He realized he was gripping the steering wheel dangerously tight and loosed his knuckles. He forced a breath out between his clenched teeth before he was fully in control again.
He looked back over to Nilin to find that her eyes were shut. Focusing his hearing, he listened to her slow even breathing. She had dozed off. He grinned at the sleeping human.
Not only did he manage to infuriate his brother today, but it seemed like his ally returned to his side. Though Stefan's words bothered him, and he knew they bothered Nilin too, but was there a truth to what Stefan said? Nilin kept Damon entertained, but there was a frightening realization that she was more than a playmate.
His smirk dropped with that thought as he pulled into the long dark driveway.
Damon parked his car and in one swift movement he was on the other side of car, lifting Nilin out. Instinctively her slender arms wrapped around his neck and she curled herself closer to him. He carried her effortlessly in the house and upstairs to the study. When he placed her on the long couch, her head rolled to one side and she mumbled something. He brushed her bangs out of her face and saw a small smile come to her lips. He hadn't seen that in a long time.
Damon's dead heart lurched forward and a desire to kiss those lips came over him, almost pulling him down towards her. He backed up, shaking his head and draped a blanket on top of her.
For the first time in a long time, Damon was dumbfounded. He didn't know what to do. Nilin was peacefully slumbering on a couch in his house, a human. A mere human whose presence alone caused things to surface that Damon has been burying for decades.
The vampire inside of him was whispering in his ear, telling him that it was perfect timing to take what he truly wanted. It urged him to give into his instincts. The human was small, powerless. It would take less than a minute to finish her off.
Damon fought the demon back though. The problem with having Nilin around was not only did she bring out his human side, but she also amplified his vampire side as well.
He looked down at Nilin. Her chocolate brown hair was to one side, showing her sharp cheekbones. Her delicate nose twitched slightly, along with her shuttering eyelids as she dreamed. He saw the faintest trace of color in her cheeks, and an image of her blushing passed through his head.
The weak human in him found it adorable, the demon thought of the blood rushing to her cheeks. He swallowed hard, feeling an ache in his throat that forced him out of the room and into the hallway.
Maybe he should have left her with Elena and his brother. Maybe they were right about him... Of course they were right about him. Damon was a monster, he was viscous and unpredictable. Nilin had seen that of him on several occasions, yet there she laid, trusting him completely.
Damon raked his fingers through his dark hair. Then he heard him name being sighed. He looked back into the study. Nilin was still out, but her lips were moiving. "Damon," she huffed again. If it wasn't for his vampire hearing he might not have picked up on the syllables. A smirk came to him lips, satisfied that he infected her dreams.
He could handle her. He was strong enough. With a sigh, Damon carefully lifted Nilin's legs, sat down and placed them back in his lap. She continued to sleep but her movements were getting restless. She let out a low breath as a smile came to her face.
"Creepy…" she mumbled, her eyes half way open. He arched an eyebrow at her as she slid up, leaning her back on the arm rest. "You were watching me sleep." Nilin smiled, tiredly rubbing her eyes.
"You talk in your sleep," he shot back and instantly blood flowed to her cheeks in a blush.
Nilin looked down. "Bad habit," she grumbled.
He smirked at her, catching her eye. "It was cute."
More blush. Nilin stretched meekly. "Sorry about that. I swear I'm usually better company. I wasn't out for to long, was I?" she asked.
He shook his head."I kept myself entertained, you had a long day." Damon said, propping his feet up on the coffee table in front of him.
Nilin kept her feet in his lap, snuggling back down a little bit. "Long day is an understatement," she scoffed. "Feels like I've had a year of long days." She put her head back, closing her eyes with sigh.
She was quiet for a second and Damon thought she'd fallen asleep again, but suddenly her stomach growled loudly. Her eyes shot open with embarrassment, knowing he had heard it.
"Hungry?" he inquired. Nilin rolled her eyes yet again and nodded her head. He grinned at her, untangling her legs and standing up. He held out his hand and she took it, following him downstairs to the massive kitchen. He sat her down on one of the wooden stools and turned to the fridge.
It was mostly barren. Stefan usually kept it some what stocked for Elena, but it seemed like he was skimping out on his boyfriend duties.
"I can offer you a beer and a grill cheese... possibly," he told her as he scavenged the fridge for butter.
"Whoa, don't spoil me now," Nilin replied sarcastically.
Damon looked over his shoulder and eyed her. "Wise ass," he said, pulling out the ingredients need for her meal.
She smiled at him and took a sip of the beer he had slid to her. "I think you like me better when I'm drunk," she retorted.
"I can say the same thing about you, sweetheart," he laughed. A genuine smile came over her face and Damon felt something in his chest. Ignoring the foreign feelings he turned his focus on making her dinner.
What is with this girl and making him feel? It was wrong what she was doing to him. Feeling was greatly overrated, at least it was in his case.
She was quiet while she downed her beer. A few minutes later he placed probably the best grilled cheese sandwich she would ever taste in front of her. Nilin dug in to it instantly.
Damon was content with just watching her. She tried to keep her eyes on everything but him, but he caught her quick glances in his direction. It made a grin come to his lips. She slid the empty plate away from her a little and looked up at him. "Thank you," she said, placing her hands in her lap.
"Anytime," he winked. Suddenly he noticed her expression change. She was quiet for a moment, looking down at her entwined hands.
"Just tell me already," she said bluntly.
He cocked his head to the side, unsure of what she was talking about. "Tell you what?"
Nilin ran her fingers through her hair before answering. "This thing, between us," she started slowly. "Is it more than just hurting Stefan?" Damon started at her, almost shell shocked. "Is it more than just screwing with Katherine's double?" she asked. He recognized Stefan's words from earlier in the night. "Or am I just blind?"
Damon's face contorted into some look of shocked disgust at her theory of his motivations. "Do you really think that low of me?" he asked.
Nilin shook her head. "No, no," she said. "I'm just trying to understand all this."
"All what?" he pushed.
"You like me, then you don't. I can trust you, then I can't. You're on my side, then you're not. You have this sweet protective side and then suddenly you're moments away from ripping my head off," she explained. "You have a very bipolar way of doing things and it gives me whiplash."
"Perks of being a vampire," he smirked humorously.
"Damon, I'm just trying to protect myself." Nilin told him.
"My brother's words got to you." Damon stated. Nilin looked down, no response. "Well if you're really that suade by what someone says-"
"No, that's not what I meant." Nilin cut him off.
"Then what did you mean?" He posed. "Hmm? Having second thoughts?" He saw Nilin stare up at him with disbelief.
"No, I'm trying to figure out why you always rescue me!" she nearly shouted.
Damon was taken back, he tried to hold her stare but her eyes dropped to her lap. "Why?' he asked with his own look of incredulity.
"Never mind," she flustered. "Forget it, I should go." Nilin mumbled, as she hopped off the stool and attempted to leave the room. It only took three seconds for Damon to flash in front of her and back her into the counter. He heard her gasp, shocked at his speed.
"What do you want from me Nilin?" he hissed, his face dangerously close to hers.
She bravely tilted her head up to him. "I just want to know why," she answered slowly.
Damon pressed against her more, forcing her back to arch against him and her head to remain tilted. "You want to know what you did?" he glared at her, feeling the humanity fight its way to the surface. "You don't back down from you. You infuriate me to no end, its like I'm constantly fight with you over something." Damon told her. "But I realized I like that about you. You've never assumed the worse of me, all though you really should. You're the only person that's ever cared for me," Damon answered. "That wasn't obligated to," he added thinking of a his brother.
Nilin's eyes softened at his words. She remained motionless against him, her hands absently placed on his chest. He looked down at her, frozen in her blue eye. He leaned forward, placing his lips near her ear. He felt her body stiffen in the thought that he was going to kiss her. But he didn't.
"Because… You poke and prod at the shrapnel of humanity that's buried in me." Damon confessed against her cheek. He couldn't look her in the eye as he gave her his last reason. Her eyes were his weakness. God, such a fucking sap, he thought bitterly.
There was a moment of hesitation, Nilin was still ridged against him. He didn't know if it was from his closeness or his reasoning, or a combination of both. He pulled back slightly, giving enough room to look her in the eyes.
He noticed her quivering lips, and the fact that her hands, that were laying flat on his chest, now gripped his shirt. Then Nilin surprised him by forcefully pushing her lips to his.
After his initial shock wore off he kissed her back just as forceful. They were battling for dominance. Lifting her up to place her on the counter, he slid between her legs, hungrily kissing her. Her fingers intertwined with his hair, pulling him in closer to her. His hands ran up and down her bare thighs, enjoying the shudder he got from her the farther they went under her dress.
He could feel it all. The last few weeks of built up emotion, frustration and craving between them. Damon's done more kissing in a life time than most, but this was something else.
She pulled back slightly. "I believe you," she said breathlessly. He looked up into her crystal eyes and was captivated. Who ever said human's couldn't compel was lying, she had him under her spell. She leaned down and started kissing him again, bringing her hands to cup his face.
This night didn't go exactly as he thought. Scratch that, his entire existence hasn't gone the way he's planned. But this was definitely an upside to that.
Almost teasingly Damon asked, "Why?" against her lips.
She stopped, detaching herself from him. "Why what?" she questioned almost nervously.
He tried to fight his grin, because he was honestly curious. "Why do you trust me?" He continued. "You did save my life once upon a time and tonight you even stupidly stop me from beating the living daylights out of Stefan. So why?" he asked again.
Nilin leaned back a little, taking in his expression. Her lips were red and slightly swollen from his attack. Her hair framed her flushed face in curls and her chest rose and fell sharply against him. She was the most captivating creature he'd ever seen.
"You would think I wouldn't make the same mistake twice," she started slowly. "Falling for one of your kind. I must be a real idiot, but you crawled your way under my skin," she told him. "And I can't get you out. For the past few years I've had this gaping hole in my chest, but you've come the closest to filling it."
He continued to stare at her, her words sinking in and hitting him. So he put the life back in her and she did the same to him. Even though it was cheesy as hell, it was true. This was ridiculous the way she made him feel. Since when did he open his lifeless heart up to humans?
"You're like a high Damon, and I'm hooked." Nilin finished, her hands sliding to the back of his neck. Her slight fingers traced patterns there. He gripped the small of her back and pulled her closer to him, crushing their bodies together.
Damon ran his hands up her sides, placing them on her warm cheeks and guiding her head down to him. He kissed her again, relishing in the taste of her. He slid his hands to her shoulders and down the inside of her arms to her wrists that where locked behind his neck, when he felt something.
He ran his hands back up her arms, and felt her shiver in delight against him, but he wasn't focused on that. The pads of his fingers were brushing against her inner arm, feeling her usually flawless skin become bumpy the closer he got to her wrist.
As if realizing what he was doing, Nilin quickly pulled back. Dropping her arms from his neck, she crossed them in front of her. She wasn't looking at him, as Damon tried to pry one of her arms away. She stubbornly wouldn't let him.
"Nilin," he said sternly. She didn't give him her arm but she did look up. "Let me see," he continued slowly. Biting her lip, he saw tears spring to her eyes as she shook her head. Damon tired his best to soften his features but his jaw was locked. There was something wrong here and he needed to see it before he could believe it.
He looked up at Nilin, who still sat on the counter and placed his hand on her cheek once more, wiping the tears that had escaped away with his thumb. He laid his other hand on the arm he was trying to dislodge from her. Unwillingly, Nilin slowly unhooked her arms. Keeping them stiff, she held them, palm up between him and her.
He looked down at the inside of her arm, turning it slightly. He ran his index finger over the pale scars on her arm. Scattered, most were in a half crescent shape, others more torn. They were barley detectable, he was surprised she was able to hide them from him for this long. He looked over her other arm, the same looking scars blemished it too.
He could feel the anger, rising in him.
"My skin has a reaction to the bites, they don't heal right." Nilly whispered, leaning her head on his. "They're just scars, Damon."
Damon knew why they healed that way, the bastard never finished feeding properly. He just left her to bleed, and bites would close like this. He wondered how many silver scars littered her body.
"Ow, Damon, you're hurting me." Nilin whimpered.
He immediately loosened his grip on her wrist, not realizing he had been squeezing so tight. He looked up at her, she had tears in her eyes. "He won't touch you again, understand?" he said, his voice sharp. "I'll rip his throat out before he gets the chance."
Nilin nodded her head, sniffling a little. Gently he picked her off the counter and placed her on the floor. Immediately her arms went around him. "Thank you, Damon," she said, muffled against his chest.
Damon rested his chin on top of her head and held her tighter to him.
Author's Notes:
Happy Monday! lol, no. I hate Mondays, but I do like updating. So here you go, Chapter 44! I hope you guys had a fabulous weekend. Here's a little something to entertain you for the week. Tell me how I did.
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See you Friday!
RLS