Chapter Forty-Five: If You Only Knew
If you only knew I'm hanging by a thread in the web I spin for you
If you only knew I'd sacrifice my beating heart before I'd lose you
I still hold onto the letters you returned
I swear I've lived and learned
It's 4:03 and I can't sleep without you next to me
I toss and turn like the sea
If I drown tonight, bring me back to life
Breathe your breath in me
The only thing that I still believe in is you
~Shinedown
Nilin stretched, curling her toes under the sheets. The sunlight coming through the window was hurting her eyes. What time was it? Where was she anyway? Nilly propped herself up on an elbow and looked around the bright yellow room. Yup, she was in her room. How'd she get back home? She sat up more, resting her back on the head board. Then she realized what she was wearing. She still had her funeral get up on, but around that was a black leather jacket… Damon…
Now it all made sense, she must have fallen asleep at the boarding house again and he, and his mystical vampire ways, took her home. Frowning, she wondered if Damon had stayed with her. As she pushed the sheets off the bed, Nilin realized that she didn't have any nightmares. So this is what a good night sleep felt like.
Nilly got up sluggishly and scurried out of Damon's jacket, placing it on top of the bed. Then she slid off her stockings and shimmied out of her dress as she made her way to the bathroom. Turning the water on scolding she washed off her smeared makeup and cleaned her hair, adding generous amounts of conditioner to the snagged curls.
When she was done she let her hair fall natural on her shoulder, already curling itself. She threw on a pair of black denim shorts and a flowing pink cropped top. Then, she went downstairs apprehensively, taking the steps slowly. When she got down there she found everyone in the dinning room. Mildred, Jenna, Elena and Jer, all sitting and eating what smelt like French toast.
Mildred saw Nilly first, she smiled at her. "Good morning, peaches," she chimed. "We didn't want to wake you, your plate is in the kitchen."
Nilin nodded and went through the double doors of the kitchen to find a warm stack of French toast covered in powered sugar. Nilly was practically salivating. She went back into the dinning room taking the empty seat next to Jeremy and in front of Jenna. Elena didn't say a word, she kept her eyes on her plate as Nilly began to demolish hers.
"We didn't hear you come home last night." Jenna announced suddenly, causing Nilly to involuntarily swallow a mouthful of milk.
"Yeah, it was late. I didn't want to bother anyone." Nilly replied, trying to hide her coughs. Jenna nodded, but eyed her suspiciously. Elena wouldn't have said anything about her being with Damon, would she?
"Where'd you go?" Jenna pushed and Nilly cringed inwardly.
"Out, I need some air the house was collapsing in on me," Nilly said, milking the guilt card. Jenna just 'Mm-hm'ed and took a bite out of a piece of bacon.
After a moment of quiet Nilly spoke up, pivoting in her chair to face Mildred who was at the head of the table. "When are you planning on going back?" Nilly asked.
Mildred looked up at her. "Probably tomorrow sweetheart, why?" she inquired, seeing right through Nilin. She stuffed a forkful of food in her mouth before answering.
"We'll I thought I'd go back with you," Nilly answered slowly. From the corner of her eye she saw Elena's head perk up. "I need to take care of things down there, and I was also wondering something."
"Go on," Mildred urged.
Nilly put her fork down and rested her hands on the table top. "Well," she began. "I was wondering if you'd wanted the house, I could sign it over in your name. I mean, you practically live there now, why not make it official?"
Nilly saw a smile come to Mildred's face as she looked at Nilly over her thick framed glasses. "That is a wonderful idea, and I would love to."
"That makes this all so much easier." Jenna commented. "You could also inherit you're father's car. I'm sure he left it to you, but now you don't have to worry about buying another one."
Nilly let out a breath of relief. That was a great idea. She had been worrying about affording a car after her poor Jeep was wrecked, but with everything that's going on a car was one of the last things on her mind.
"Well that's two problems solved," she said slowly. "Too bad there are about a hundred more to deal with." Nilin mumbled, under her breath.
"Don't worry yourself, peaches." Mildred said, patting the top of Nilly's hand.
"I know my dad left me some money, but I can't touch it until I'm eighteen, which is a few months." Technically speaking she would be, playing along with the whole 'non-adopted cousins' lie. "I don't think I can stay in Hopesville, I never really like that place. So, I'll get a job and find an apartment somewhere, then I'll be out of you're hair." Nilly continued, looking at Jenna.
"What? No, no." Jenna said with Elena and Jeremy shaking their heads. "You're staying here, no arguing."
"We're all we have left," Jeremy spoke up. "We're sticking together." His words made Nilly's heart lurch out of her chest. She swallowed back the tears as a sad smile came over her lips.
"We need you here." Elena said softly, finally meeting Nilly's eyes.
She nodded. "Okay, I'll stay here then and finish up school," she agreed, laughing a little. Jenna reached over and squeezed Nilly's hand.
"So it's settled. You can ever paint the room whatever you want," she smiled. Well, that was a bonus, getting rid of that ghastly cheery yellow sounded amazing.
"I'll go back with Mildred tomorrow, clean the house out, pack the car up and head back home." Nilly said with a smiled. Jenna nodded in agreement.
"I'll go with you," Elena suddenly spoke up.
Nilly was taken back and slowly turned to her, casting a glare her way. "No, it's fine." Nilly replied slowly. "I rather do this alone."
Elena shook her head, a stern look on her face. "This is going to be difficult, Nilly. You need someone there, let me be there for you." Elena said back, her voice indicating that they weren't only talking about her father's house.
"She's right," Mildred interjected, causing Nilly to look at her. "Everything should be fine if she comes. You might need her support." Nilly shook her head, her stomach was beginning to do flips.
If Mildred thought it was fine though…
"Alright, whatever." Nilly said defeated.
"Maybe Bonnie would like to go to." Elena offered. "She'd like to help."
Nilly's eyes shot to Elena. What was she doing? It was unbelievable that Elena wasn't seeing the real danger in this.
"No, not Bonnie. We don't need too many people." Nilly urged, eyeing Elena.
"She'd want to help." Elena pushed.
Nilly gripped her fork, sending daggers Elena's way. "Why we're at it why don't we bring Stefan and Caroline along with us too!" Nilly nearly shouted, standing up quickly.
Elena eyes were scolding, her lips set straight as Nilly named the other two people she cared about most. At least the realization was sinking in that this was dangerous, but Nilly was still seething.
She had her arms braced on the table leaning towards Elena, she turned her head. "Hey, Jer. Wanna come too?" she asked her voice threatening. Now Elena was standing, leaning towards Nilly the same way.
"Knock it off, Nilin," she shouted back.
"Why aren't you seeing that I want to do this alone?! It's better!"
"What if I invited Damon? Hmm? Would that be better as well?" Elena barked, her voice rising.
Nilly stood there, staring at her with her mouth gaping like a fish. Her nails dug into the table as she answered. "Yes, that would be fabulous," she retorted, scooting her chair back and storming out of the room.
"What the hell was that?" she heard Jenna say as Nilly left the dinning room and went out to the front porch. She didn't realize she had been pacing back and forth until Mildred came out of the house.
"Keep that up and you'll make a trench to other side," she joked lightly. Nilly sighed leaning against the railing, crossing her arms over her chest. Mildred sat attentively on the porch swing, flattening out her floral skirt. "Now are you going explain to me what that was about?"
"No." Nilly mumbled, looking down. Mildred sat patiently with her hands locked in her lap, staring at her. With a groan, Nilly went over and sat next to her. "She doesn't understand how serious going back there is! I don't know where Christian is and what if he's there. I can't protect them, Mildred!" Nilly shouted.
Mildred placed a hand on Nilly's knee. "I don't think it will be dangerous for them if they were to come, peaches. If they stayed at the house nothing would happen and that's saying if he even is there." Mildred explained. "But that beside the point, it's your decision and I think bringing a witch and a vampire or two might not hurt."
"Yeah, but-" Nilly paused, turning to Mildred slowly. "Did you say 'vampire'?" She nodded, a smile on her lips. "But… How? Wha-?"
"I'm a very old witch, Nilin. We sense them and, from what I could tell, you had two in your house last night," she explained. "One was even brave enough to shake my hand."
Nilly stared at her, mouth gaping. "Stefan?" she questioned.
Mildred shook her head. "It was the boy you came downstairs with, the gentleman with the dark eyes. I believe his name is Damon." Mildred corrected with sureness. Nilly's eyebrows lifted in surprise. "He was fully aware of what I was. He's a strong vampire, meaning he sensed me as I sensed him, yet he offered me his hand after you left."
"And…?" Nilly questioned, knowing there was more to what she was saying.
"And he has a very dark heart," Mildred said, Nilly's lips frowned. "But there was a spark I felt when he looked at you, very peculiar." Nilly nodded, staring off in space. "I like this one much better than the first, I must say. He's a really charmer." Mildred winked. Nilin laughed a little. "What did you get yourself into again, peaches?" Mil asked.
Nilin stopped laughing. She rubbed her eyes. "I don't know, Mildred. I have no clue," she admitted to the elderly woman. "I'm scared though."
Mildred hushed her. "I can't take away your fear, Nilin, but I can reassure you of your strength. You'll be okay."
"And him?" Nilly asked timidly.
"You have to be patient though, he's had a cold front up for to long. It's hard to change one's ways," she told her. From what Mildred was saying though it seemed like she trusted Nilly with Damon. That she understood her and where she was coming from.
"So, you think he's worth all this?"
Mildred smiled, squeezing her knee. "He is," she responded. "Just remember that."
Nilly nodded with a soft smile. "Mildred?"
"Hmm?" she answered.
"How do you know all this stuff? Nilly asked.
Mildred gave her a strange grin. "The spirits talk, they see much more than me and like to gossip a lot."
Nilly nodded and shifted on the bench, "Oh, gotcha."
"And what do we have here?" Mildred said out of the blue. Nilly looked at her, then off to where she was staring. That's when she saw Magnolia and Shellie coming up the porch steps. Shellie was smiling, holding an armful of flowers. Magnolia came up behind her, Lee-Roy's big fluffy head dodging between their legs eagerly.
"Someone wanted to see you," Magnolia called as Lee-Roy rushed up to Nilin, placing his head in her lap.
"Hey buddy," she said as she scrunched his ears. Nilly stood up greeting the girls.
"These are for you, picked them myself." Shellie said proudly, handing Nilly the flowers.
"Thank you, they're beautiful," she smiled. "Oh, guys. This is Mildred." Nilly said quickly, motioning to the elderly lady who was now standing next to her.
"You're a witch." Shellie blurted out innocently in wonderment.
They all chuckled. Mildred nodded, taking Shellie's hands between her own. "And ya'll are something else…" Mildred speculated. She closed her eyes for a moment, then opened them with amazement. "Well now isn't your kind a rarity."
"You know about Servitors?" Nilly questioned with an arched eyebrow.
"Of course I do!" Mildred laughed. "They're a mystery among the supernatural community due to their low numbers, coming across one is an honor. May I ask what you can do?" Mildred said somewhat in awe, not releasing Shellie's hands.
She looked at the older woman with respect as she answered. "I have the power of sight, my cousin, she's an empath." Shellie explained with a smile.
"My god, how brilliant." Mildred mused. Then she went and took Magnolia's hand. "You're gift is even more rare," she continued and Nilly actually saw Magnolia blush. "Why didn't you tell me about these to young ladies? I have so many questions." Mildred said turning to Nilly. She shrugged defensively, raising her eyebrows. "This is only the second time I've come across Servitors." Mil announced.
"Second?" Shellie gasped, taking a seat next to Mildred on the porch swing again.
Mil nodded. "This first time was in Chicago, the 1970's," she enlightened with a wise voice. Shellie's eyes widen as she began to recount her experience.
Nilly motioned for Magnolia to follow her and they both slipped into the house, leaving Shellie and Lee-Roy entranced in Mil's memory.
Once inside Nilly led Magnolia to the kitchen. "You thirsty?" she asked as she filled a vase with water for the flowers.
"No, I'm good." Magnolia answered, sitting on one of the island's stools. Nilly turned from the sink, placing the bouquet in the middle of the counter.
"Waa-la." Nilly smiled, sitting across from her. "They really are beautiful," she continued mesmerized by the bight colors. "You have to thank Shellie for me again."
Magnolia grinned, lounging back on the stool. "Yeah she's got an act for that nature stuff, me not so green," she joked, holding up her thumbs.
Nilly chuckled, shaking her head. "Same here."
"So you seem better, a little anxious though. Want to tell me why?" Magnolia urged.
Nilly raised her eyebrow. "Don't you already know?"
"Maybe," she smiled.
"I need to go back to Hopesville," Nilly sighed.
"And…?"
"And Elena wants to come. Scratch that, she is coming and planning on bring half the freaking town with her," Nilly spouted.
"And that's not good… because of Christian?" Magnolia questioned.
She nodded, "Exactly." There was a pause and Nilly looked up a Mags. "I'm scared he'll hurt them," she confessed in a whispered tone.
Magnolia gave her a lop-side smiled, her amber eyes shining. "They'll be okay," she said just as softly. "I'm worried about you."
"What did Shellie see?" Nilly asked stiffening.
Magnolia shook her head, laughing a little. "She didn't see anything, I'm feeling it. You're dealing with a lot right now, yet I'm picking up on almost nothing here."
"I've had practice with hiding emotions for some time now. It's kinda what I do." Nilin shrugged.
"But all that emotion is going to come bubbling up sooner or later," Mags told her.
Nilin narrowed her eyes. "Thanks, Doctor Phil."
"Hey," Magnolia raised her hands in defense. "I just call it how I see it." Nilin smiled a little. "I don't thank there's any harm if she were to go," she advised suddenly.
Nilly groaned and dropped her head on the table. She wasn't going to let Elena come with her, there had to be a way to keep her safe here in MysticFalls. If Elena can have her schemes, why couldn't she? Nilly lifted her head, nearly smirking as she thought of something.
"You're starting to scare me," Magnolia retorted. "I don't like where this is going."
Nilly's lips dropped. "I don't know what you're talking about," she pouted.
Magnolia smiled, laughing at her a little. "Sure," she eyed.
Nilly went to defend herself, but Jeremy walked in. "Hey, Ni-" He stopped, seeing Magnolia sitting there. "Sorry, I didn't realize you had someone here."
"Its okay, Jer. This is Magnolia." Nilly introduced. "And Shellie's somewhere…" She cranked her neck to look out the window trying to see if they were still out there.
"Hey," he nodded, Magnolia smiled back.
"This is the other Gilbert." Nilly smiled, returning back to them.
"Yeah, unfortunately," he mumbled.
"Owch." Nilly touched her chest in pretend hurt. Jeremy just rolled his eyes. Suddenly Nilly heard someone giggle and she turned to see Shellie coming through the front door her arm linked with Mildred.
Shellie looked up and smiled. "Can I take her home with me?" she asked and Mildred squeezed her hand.
"You've got a lively one here," Mil smiled to Magnolia before giving Shellie another squeeze and heading upstairs.
Nilly laughed and turned to Jeremy. "And that's Shellie," she smiled but clearly Jeremy wasn't listening. He had his eyes locked with Shellie's, both had a goofy smile on their faces.
"I'm Jeremy," he said, still smiling.
"Nice to meet you," Shellie twirled her hair.
"Alright, time to go." Magnolia announced, standing up. "Where's my dog?" she asked, snapping her fingers in front of Shellie.
"Hmm? What…? Outside," she mumbled.
Magnolia shook her head. "You need me?" she asked Nilly.
Nilly shook her head. "I'm good."
"Good, come on Shells," she said pulling on her arm.
"Bye Nilly, Bye Jeremy." Shellie smiled, letting Magnolia drag her out.
"Bye," Nilly and Jeremy said in unison. Nilly turned to her cousin, arching an eyebrow.
He shrugged. "What? She's cute," he grinned.
Nilly shook her head. "Did you want something before you came in here eye flirting with my friend?"
"Oh yeah, Elena was heading to Stefan's and she wanted to talk to you when she got back," he answered.
"Did she leave already?" she asked.
"Um, yeah I think. Why?"
Nilly smiled. Perfect. "Just wondering, thanks," she called to him quickly before heading out to catch up with Elena.
Author's Notes:
It's Friday! Woo. I hope you all had a fantastic week. Here's a little something from me to end your long week. Again, not a very action pack or steamy chapter. Its more of a bridge to the real action yet to come. So check back Monday evening for more! Thank you all for the new reviews, I love them.
Remember to Favorite, Follow & Review!
RLS