Finaaaaalllyy! The chapter is heeeereeeee (John Cena voice)! I, myself, had to read older chapters for some refreshers, but let's continue on with the drama shall we? I'm really happy with where this story is. Thank you for bearing with me! And thank you to Cena's baby doll, therealchamps, and Pinayprincesa for reviewing the last chapter. Enjoy everyone!
Two well-acquainted men exchanged noisy gazes opposite of each other. The light hum of the air conditioner filled the otherwise quiet room, bringing forth a welcomed sound with the breeze. Randy had his back pressed against the single-seater chair while John leaned off the well-beaten couch.
Rubbing his hands together, the tattooed man dressed in a fitted gray t shirt and flannel pajama bottoms looked out the window. He knew what John came here to talk about. He didn't want to engage in the topic, but he allowed him to come in anyway. What else did he have to lose?
"I wanted to talk about you," John said. "I heard what happened back stage."
A soft chuckle passed through Randy's lips. His head snapped to John's direction. "If I remember correctly, my shit was the least of your worries."
John pursed his lips tightly. He couldn't help but notice the bandage around Randy's hand.
"It's because of Alyssa, huh? She got her little big heart involved again so you wanna be involved too. Listen, John, I really don't want anything to do with her. I don't want to talk to her. I don't want to talk about her. I-"
"So let's talk about you," John said.
Randy shook his head. "No. No matter what, in your head, this conversation will still revolve around Alyssa. I don't wanna be a part of it."
"Why?"
"Why the hell should I answer that?"
"Because I'm trying to understand you. And hell, as much as you don't wanna involve Alyssa in your life anymore, she's still very much a part of it."
"You're right, but this isn't gonna help take her out of it."
"Okay." John shrugged. He allowed some silence to instill a form of challenge. This also gave way for his muscles to relax against the ripped leather seats. This seemed like it was going to be a long night. He might as well get comfortable.
Randy grimaced and stared aimlessly into space. "Candy…Candy's been a breath of fresh air."
Remaining mute, John welcomed the change of topic. He stretched his muscular limbs across the armrests.
"She was the first person to ever make me feel okay being away from Alyssa. Sam didn't even do that. When we were married and I didn't see Al for a week, I still went a little crazy. But Candy…Candy made me feel okay. She made me not miss her."
"Are you saying she helped you get over Alyssa?"
The sides of Randy's mouth perched higher as he turned to look at him. "I have a simple question to answer that. How can you get over a woman like Alyssa?"
John nodded slowly, not wanting to even think of the answer. Still, it was a little odd having someone else profess having the same feelings for his girlfriend.
"It looked like I was over her, because we were in this big game of pretend. All these years, we pretended we were never together. I pretended I wasn't interested in her. I pretended I was in love with some body else. I pretended she was never going to be with anyone else. But as soon as Sam left me, I stopped pretending. It made me see the reality. Alyssa does not wanna be with me. She will never be mine in the same sense. No matter how many guys I fight off of her, it would not make her come back to me."
For a majority of the time John's known Randy, he never pegged him to be a big liar. Yet for some reason, this sounded like the most honest thing Randy's ever said.
"She wants you, John. She loves you. She really does. She would've been fine being single for the rest of her life. She's stronger like that, but she allowed herself to be vulnerable just to be with you."
John continued to nod. These were things he already knew but hearing it from Randy still made it seem like a revelation. It was the acceptance and approval he never knew he even wanted.
"I'm happy for you guys. That's why I decided to just stay away."
"That's why I came here. Judging from that stunt you pulled backstage, you don't seem very happy with yourself."
"Don't matter. I'm finally doing my best friend right. How can I not be happy about that?"
"So you're cutting her off? You really think that's best?"
"Yeah."
"As much as you wanna stay away, she'll still care. She's been that way all her life with you."
"I know, but she can take care of those feelings without me. Besides, she has you doesn't she?"
"She does." John said without question. And somehow, someway, it felt like Alyssa was finally free.
Alyssa stared into her mug full of freshly brewed coffee and moaned at the aroma. It was so intoxicating, she was able to ignore the seemingly growing stacks of paperwork that needed tending to. Her lips hovered over rim before touching the warm glass completely. With that, she was able to take three swigs of the energy liquid before setting it down. The numbered gulps was not enough, by any means, but she didn't want to waste any more time. There was a lot of work to do. She jumped off the table she sat on and hauled the stack on one arm. Tugging on her white blouse to be free of crease, she began her descend down the hallway. Her pony tail shifted side to side with each purposeful step. This was exactly how she liked her mornings: busy and productive.
Minutes later, the pile rested on her was halfway through. This meant that she was finally able to start on her own assigned work. The first half of her morning had been spent doing Jackie's stack. The suspicious co-worker had asked for yet another favor, and Alyssa hadn't said no. Being the hard worker that she was, Alyssa was afraid that if she disagreed to help, the company would've been compromised. Besides, she liked having a little more control over the flow of her job. The more things to do, the more things to control.
Unfortunately, she didn't seem to have much control over her mind. Sporadic boats of fused worry and anger would curse through her. They'd attack her out of no where, anywhere: hallway corners, locker rooms, the meeting room. Even with the heavy load of duties, she couldn't stop herself from feeling unrest. What was causing this emotional uproar was not apparent to her. Thankfully, each and every time her mind fell into the hole, her work would pull her right back up.
Sighing, Alyssa stopped at a barren table and emptied her arms. The slap of paper on laminate made a sound as she inwardly groaned to herself. She suddenly remembered waking up and not seeing John beside her this morning. It was a disappointment that kicked off her day. She suddenly wondered where he'd been and where he was. Hearing a commotion coming closer, she jumped onto the table and prepared to people watch. She figured she'd done enough work for the time being and could use a little social interaction. She anticipated the people coming only to feel winded when they finally came to view. Her cheeks burned from mortification as she looked on.
Bryan, John, and Randy were walking together.
She held her breath and stepped down from the table, her legs suddenly jello. It didn't take long for John to notice her presence and he was by her side within seconds.
"Hey baby."
Alyssa looked at him then at Randy. "Wha-am -am I seeing things?"
John rotated his torso to look back at the two men he'd just excused himself from. They had kept walking down the hallway. "We were discussing training."
"Oh." Alyssa said. It was business. Did that mean anything?
John briefly removed his hat to scratch the back of his head. "Everything okay?"
Without answering right away, Alyssa picked up her work and nodded. "Yeah. I just gotta get more stuff done. I'll see you later?"
He nodded and smiled. "I look forward to it. Have a good day."
Alyssa kissed him before walking away, mentally thanking herself for taking the route she'd taken prior. Conveniently, she was headed the opposite direction of Randy Orton. This would ensure there would be no run-ins with him. Who knew what more trouble that could bring?
To her next disappointment, Randy came hobbling down the same hallway just a few minutes later. She hadn't noticed his limp earlier. His face barely showcased the struggle evident in the rest of his body, but it was enough to spike Alyssa's concern and attention. She turned to him slowly before moving closer, her work still cradled in her arms.
"Hey, are you okay?" she asked.
Randy forcefully straightened his posture and kept walking. "I'm fine."
Alyssa looked on as he inched away. "Are you cleared by the doctor to be working tonight?"
Randy grunted and faced her straight-on. His demeanor only grew more stern. "What part of leave me alone do you not understand?"
"I-I'm just trying to do my job," Alyssa forced strength into her tone. It was half the truth.
"Well, I'm trying to do mine, too. Just leave me the hell alone, will you?"
Her face registered hurt, and she did nothing to try and hide it. Neither did she stop her lips from trembling. This was certainly not the Randy Orton she grew up with. He would never be this cold to her. "Why are you being so rude?"
Randy began shaking his head. It was clear his patience was beginning to run. "I don't have to explain myself to you."
She glared at him, feeling her own wave of anger. "Is that what you really think of us now? That it's okay for you to have no decency towards me?"
Randy pointed his hands out and shrugged in a careless notion.
"Yeah it was good for us to have space, but that doesn't give you the right to be an asshole."
Trying desperately to quell his annoyance, Randy blew out a strained breath. "Okay, I'm an asshole. I'll take that. So you should definitely just stay away."
"That's how we're gonna leave this? That's what you want?"
"Yup."
"Why?" she challenged.
Randy was beginning to feel weary. Continuing this conversation was not in his desires, but he realized there was no fooling his best friend. Honesty, after all, was the best policy.
"Why? You really wanna know why, Alyssa? Because I've been in love with you all my life. From when you slabbed dirt across my white shirt on picture day, from when you would pull apart my PB&J sandwiches just so you could have more jelly, from when you would hum every time you got a hold of a black crayon or maker because it was your favorite color. I grew up wanting you, but I always thought I wasn't good enough. Then one night I finally decide to just kiss you, and you kissed me back. That changed everything, because for the first time, I actually thought I could be good for you. But we both know how I screwed that up. Immediately, I went back to thinking I wasn't good enough for you. Hell, I thought no one could ever be good enough for you. I remember so clearly the look on your face when you found out about Melanie. I swore to myself you would never feel that way again. So, I ignored my feelings for you. I got married. I'm divorced. And I'm still in love with you."
Alyssa was hanging on to his every word that she couldn't think of any of her own. She stood there unmoving and breathless. Even her mind was absolutely stripped.
"What I want is you, Alyssa. I wanna be with you. I wanna be that person that sees your face first thing in the morning. I wanna hear about your day. I wanna pick out ornaments with you. I wanna go to souvenir shops with you in every city we could name. I wanna sit in silence with you for hours. I wanna tell you how graceful you age when you get your first white hair. I wanna tell our kids about us as kids. But tell me this: how do you make it work between two people when they want completely opposite things? No one's ever gonna win."
Desperate to counter his last statement, Alyssa tried to speak, but all she found was a tear brimming her left eye. Didn't they both want to stay in each other's lives? Wasn't that enough common ground?
"I ruined a marriage, because I stayed around you. Whenever I was with another woman, I couldn't stop thinking about how much more I enjoy spending time with you. I can't have that anymore, Al."
A wet line made its way down Alyssa's cheek.
"I know we're used to always making it work with one another, but you and me both know now that we never really worked out right. This has been wrong all along. I cant have you in my life."
Randy stepped closer in proximity, quickly feeling their once shared intimacy. He didn't hesitate to wrap both arms around her neck. Although she didn't reciprocate this familiar contact, she smelled the same and felt the same. A thin stack of paperwork separated them, but for Randy, this was more than enough. She wasn't hugging him back, but this was still the most he's touched Alyssa in weeks. Randy tightened his grip.
"I love you, Alyssa. I have to let you go," he said.
Without looking at each other, as Randy began to pull away, tears spilled down their faces. Within a snap, they were separated and all alone.