Chapter Forty-Eight: Dead Memories

And when I got away, I only got so far.
The other me is dead, I hear the voice inside my head
We were never alive, and we won't be born again.
But I'll never survive with dead memories in my heart.
You told me to love you and I did.
Tied my soul into a knot and got me to submit.
So when I got away, I only kept my scars.
The other me is gone, now I don't know where I belong
~Slipknot

"What's not to understand? Your heart's too big for your own good. You care about him."

He could hear Elena's voice in his head again. The two sisters made it way too easy to eavesdrop on them. Now that phrase wouldn't get out of his ear. Damon shrugged it off at the moment, but he could still feel it pricking at his brain.

He stood on the back patio, where he had escaped to when he heard them coming his way. Damon gazed around the backyard now listening intently to his surroundings and picking up on the sounds of the neighborhood. He could hear things as close as the voices of Nilin and Elena above him in, what he guessed was Nilin's room, to things as far as the highway that they had gotten off of miles back. He picked up on everything in between; the sound of a dog whining in the distance, accompanied by the start of the frogs and crickets chirping as dusk approached, the random cars that would pass here and there, someone trying to console a crying child a few houses down. Everything else seemed to be calm. He scanned the tree line one last time before turning to go back into the house.

Stepping through the sliding doors silently, he spotted his brother and the elderly witch talking. Stefan obliviously being a gentleman, with his shiny halo, was leaning on the counter as the old woman rambled about something. Stefan's eyes lifted and he spotted Damon, unable to hide the quick instant of surprise that flashed across his face.

Damon grinned in the satisfaction of spooking his little brother. He was going to make one of his witty comments but was interrupted by the clatter of Nilin dragging a large red suit case down the stairs, making a mass amount of noise as she struggled with it.

Showing off his own ability to be a gentleman, Damon went to help her. Easily he lifted the case and placed it by the front door. A breathless 'thank you' came from Nilin as she quickly threw her curly hair into a bun. He returned her thank you with a wink as Elena came down the stairs with a cardboard box. She placed it next to the suitcase, eyeing Damon. He smiled back, enjoying the eye roll he got from her. Then she disappeared into the kitchen, no doubt to find her Saint Stefan, leaving Damon with Nilin.

She was kneeling on the ground, rearranging the items in the box to better close it. She huffed once it was sealed and stood up. Damon, shamed to admit it, felt discomfort from the tension between them. It was the battle of the human and the demon inside of him again. The humanity seemed to have a stronger hold on him than usual. It wanted him to tell Nilin that he heard what she had been saying to Elena before. The other part was saying screw it, that it didn't matter.

He wasn't much of a fan of internal conflict, so he played it cool.

"What's all this?" he asked causally.

"Clothes, and shoes," she answered, pointing to the suitcase then the box. "You don't realize how much crap you have until you try to shove it all into a box," she shook her head. The small smile on her face didn't reach her eyes, which were normally electric blue but now the irises were dull and worn looking.

"Well, lucky for you I am an expert at fitting large things into small places," he flirted, waggling his eyebrows.

A faint blush came over Nilin's cheeks as she rolled her eyes. "That was an absolutely terrible joke, Damon." she told him. "I think you're losing your game old man."

"Old man, eh?" Damon asked, raising an eyebrow as he took an intimidating step towards her. He could see her eyes widen as she instinctive back up. "Could an old man make your heart beat faster?" he asked her, backing her up against the wall. "Can he make your pupils dilate, your breaths to catch in your throat?"

"Um, uh…" she stuttered, flattening herself against the wall.

"Well can he?" Damon leaned towards her. He noticed her stiffen up as he came closer. Nilin bit her lip, and locked eyes with him.

"Damon," Nilin warned.

"Nilin," he mimicked with a smirk.

"Let me breathe before I stake you," she threatened. He laughed, brushing the bangs out of Nilin's eyes before he took a step back.

"I think you meant to say 'before I jump your bones'," he told her, enjoying the blush that filled her cheeks.

"Yeah, that's it." Nilin retorted sarcastically. She seemed to get her bearings back together as she said slowly, "Well then, Mr. Salvatore. Why don't you put that arrogant expertise of yours to good use and help me pack?"

Smiling triumphantly, he surprised her by taking her hand and pulling her up the stairs. She didn't object, but at the top of the stairs she stepped ahead of him and led him to her bedroom. She slipped her hand out of his as she swung open her door, stepping in. He followed her, momentarily stopping in her doorway to glance around.

The room was somewhat in disarray, things tossed haphazardly, the closet doors open and bare. A big bed sat in the middle of the room between two large windows that were sealed shut with white shear curtains. White sheets were tossed on the bed, falling over the white iron footboard which he noticed had lights entangled through it. On the wall adjacent to the bed was split in half, one side was the closet, the other a massive white maple book self that stood out against the navy walls. It was filled with novels, notebooks and pictures. A matching dresser sat across from the bed, more pictures and knickknacks covered it.

His eyes wandered to Nilin who was fidgeting with something on her nightstand, there was a static buzz which was quickly replaced my music. She turned towards him, smiling a little.

"I haven't heard this song in forever," she seemed to say to herself. Nilin began to sing along as she made her way over to the book shelf. "Could you hand me that?" she asked between verses. Damon realized he had been marveling at her and quickly snapped out of it as he slid the box she had been pointing to over to her. She smiled and continued to sing.

"But the rain won't fall
For the both of us.
The sun won't shine
On the both of us.
Believe me when I say,
That I wouldn't have it any other way.
Your time will come if you wait for it,
If you wait for it."

Then he went over and made himself comfortable on her bed as Nilin began to place books into the box. She looked behind her, doing a double-take before rolling her eyes at him. He wondered if her eyes would get stuck in her head if she kept that up.

"What are you smirking at?" Nilin glared, her lips perking up.

"Oh, nothing," he smiled back, folding his arms behind his head.

She huffed and turned back around. "I though you were going to help," she accused over her shoulder.

"I am. I'm here for support," he explained. She scoffed at him as she tossed another book into the box. Sighing, he got off the bed and slid the box over being nosy.

"The man who knew no boundaries," he heard Nilin mumble under her breath. He just chuckled and continued to poke through her collection of books; several poetry books, one in Italian, a few Steven King and James Patterson. He smirked when he pulled out a worn looking Beauty and the Beast story book. He held it up, raising an eyebrow.

"What? I'm a sucker for an epic fairytales." Nilin shrugged as she took the book from his hand, trying to straighten out the folded corners. She bent down and placed it gently back in the box. "It was my mom's," she explained, smiling softly.

His confidence seemed to take a shot with the look on her face. It almost pained him. "You don't talk about her a lot," he commented sensitively. She shrugged, not looking at him as she turned to take more off the shelves.

"Not much to tell," she said, a detached tone in her voice. "She was sick for a while and died when I was eleven." Nilin stared to explain. "It was one of those times where it was like 'anyone but her'. She was just always so alive and smiling, always smiling." Nilin shook her head slightly. "My mom knew how to handle everything, she kept things together and when she was gone everything just crumbled. My dad moved us out here a few years later. And then a series of unfortunate events has brought us to our present day situation."

"Oh and how very unfortunate," he remarked lightly and saw a smile tug at her lips.

"Very," she replied. Then she was quiet for a little as she cleared the next self off, squatting by the box. "I have this memory," Nilin finally spoke up. "Of her teaching me how to play the piano and I remember hating it. I absolutely couldn't stand sitting there. And one day, after much complaining out of me, she stood up, patted me on the head and left the room." He watched her smile, though he didn't understand the humor of it but she kept going. "Me, of course being a flighty seven year old was ecstatic to get up and leave, but something stopped me. I didn't leave. Instead I sat up straight and tried the scale again, over and over.Finally," she emphasized, "I got it and just to turn around and find my mom sitting behind me. She had been there the entire time," she smiled, shaking her head. "Pretty sneaky, huh?"

"Well now I know where you get it from," Damon told her.

"I'm not…" Nilly paused for a moment. "Well…" she winked.

Damon laughed, unsure how to handle the bit of information she had just trusted him with. He knew it meant a lot to share that story, he could see that. He felt like he was undeserving of this precious memory she handed to him, but Nilin must've though he deserved it.

"Anyway, that's my story. Now what's yours?" she asked, closing the box and slinking over to the bed.

"Excuse me?"

"I told you a heart-felt story, that comes at a price," she explained. When he still looked at her with confusion she continued, "You know, I'll show you mine if you show me yours."

"Oh, so that's the game we're playing?" His lips curved into a grin.

She blushed, her eyes narrowing slightly. "No, no. That's not what we're play. I- I just want to know something about you," she mumbled.

He smiled at her innocence and sat next to her on the bed, leaning back. He caught her eyes grazing over his lounged form as she bit her lip and smirked to himself.

"Fine, if I must," he sighed, gaining her attention again. Was she blushing? "I was a soldier once," he revealed. Nilly pivoted her body, facing him so that one leg hung off the bed and the other was tucked under her.

"Really?" she inquired.

"Mmhm," he nodded. "A confederate."

"Oh?" Nilly's eyebrows lifted, realizing the time period. "Ooooh…"

"I only joined because of my father, he forced me. Didn't even bat an eye at sending his first son into war, as long as it meant I was out of sight. And when I left the war, well lets just say he wasn't to happy." Damon smiled.

Nilin placed a hand on his, squeezing it slightly. "Well, he must have had reason behind it, right?" she asked softly.

He laughed, unable to help himself. "You didn't know my father. He loved Stefan. Me, on the other hand," Damon shrugged. "The man couldn't stand me." Nilin was laughing slightly, but her eyes were sad. He didn't understand why. "Is that enough to cover my debt?" He asked tauntingly.

"For now," she winked, sliding off the bed and over to her bookshelf. She sat on the floor with her back against the wall. The look on her face confused him, she seemed sad. He was usually good at this, reading women. He could read them like a book. Thus far there had only been two exceptions. The first one destroyed him and the second one had the power to do the same.

"You okay?" he asked, annoyed with how sensitive his voice sounded.

"Hmm? Yeah, I'm fine," she smiled faintly. "I'm drained. It's just late and I should bring this downstairs." Nilin said, standing and reaching down. He was quicker though and grabbed the box off the floor before she could even touch it.

"I've got it," he grinned.

She looked down quickly, her hands dropping to her sides. "You're doing it again," she mumbled meekly.

He lifted an eyebrow. "And what's that, gorgeous?" he asked, clearly throwing her off.

She kept her eyes down as she answered, "Making me like you."

He couldn't help but smiled, he relished in her reaction to him. "I'll try to keep that under control," he offered. Finally she lifted her eyes to him.

"Thank you, Damon." Nilin said, scurrying out of the room.

Author's Notes:

Hello my lovely readers! I've missed you guys. I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter. I find writing soft Damon very very very challenging, so tell me how I did. I love to hear your thoughts, comments, questions and concerns. Anything you want to let me know just comment. I also want to thank my latest followers and favorites. Thank you for joining us and supporting me. I appreciate it so much. See you guys on Friday!

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