Chapter 14 - Distancing

We had a word for this where I came from. Clusterfuck. Or as Pete would say, FUBAR. Either way, as we all hurried across the bridge like guilty rats, grateful to see land beneath us again as we doubled over to catch our breath, I was seething. Nick was like a dumb, dangerous dog. A dog that needed to be put down.

"Who the fuck was that?" Rebecca coughed, clutching her stomach as she took a seat on a log.

"It looked like he had a gun on you guys!" Alvin exclaimed.

"He drew on me!" Nick defended. "He was about to shoot!"

"Shut up, Nick!" Clem shot, tired and defeated, all her gusto gone. I glared at him, too, before shaking my head and turning away.

"What did you see, Clem? Was that guy gonna shoot?"

"Fuck you, Luke!" Nick snapped. "You been on my case the whole week!"

"And why do you think that is, Nick!?"

"Because you're an asshole?" He shouted.

"It happened too fast," Clem interjected, always the peacemaker.

"You were right there!" Carlos pushed.

"Either way," Luke continued, "you coulda hit one of them," he gestured to Clem and I. "Or me!"

"Yeah, but I didn't!"

Pointless. Utterly pointless. I straightened up, unsheathing my knife.

"Look, I know Pete was close to you, man, but you can't-"

"Don't fucking talk about him!"

Hearing Pete's name again struck me to the core. I dropped my head, staring at the grass and the knife in my hand, feeling lightheaded, the skin of my fingers. bitten by the northerly wind. The mountain loomed ahead, blocking out the rapidly setting sun.

"Do you think he was with Carver?" Carlos hazarded warily.

"I don't know," Luke muttered, exhausted. "I... no. I don't think so. He fell over the side, anyway."

"We have to keep moving." The wind shifted, making the trees flutter ominously.

"I can't..." Rebecca breathed. "I need a minute."

"Fine," Carlos conceded. "Luke, can I talk to you alone?"

Everyone went their separate ways. I watched Nick take a seat on the bench outside the little white cable car station, his head in his hands. My blood burned with the ache to run, to eject myself from the situation in which I'd landed. Instead, I distracted myself the only way I knew how – putting myself to use.