shots in the dark

V: Jinora
what if you were me

They reach Senlin at sunset. The dying sun bathes everything in a pale glow, illuminating the collapsing skyline of the city against pink and orange clouds. Near the entrance of the city is a huge statue of a panda bear, chipped away by the elements with chunks of stone missing, labeled Hei Bai. Jinora supposes it must have been handsome, once upon a time. Now it was just sad.

She glances at Kai, wondering again how his statue had been chipped away, how the cracks in his eyes had formed. "We're gonna need a good night's rest tonight," she says, injecting casualness into her voice. If Kai notices he doesn't comment.

"Probably smart," he says happily. "So, what do you want for dinner Jin?"

"Maybe something other than crackers?" she says hopefully.

"Last box of cereal," Kai holds up a box of Fruit-Loops, tossing it over to her.

"A real delicacy," she smiles and cracks the box open. The fruit loops are stale, leaving a hard, crusty taste in her mouth. It's edible, though. "Catch one?" She throws a fruit loop in his direction, and he catches in his mouth, a goofy grin spreading across his face.

"Good throw," he compliments. Jinora flushes.

"Not so bad yourself," she turns around, pretending to get something out of her backpack, but really is using it for an excuse to hide her face. She looks up at the city looming above them, thinking hard. There's food waiting in there, and zombies. It would be worth it though; their food supplies is dangerously low, with only enough left for a few days at most.

"Hey Jin... you okay?" Kai's voice snaps her out of her stupor.

"Yeah," she directs her attention towards him. "Yeah I'm fine."

And he leaves it at that. They're good at ignoring their feelings.

The night is cold. Kai wakes up screaming once. Jinora doesn't ask him why - she isn't sure she really wants to know the answer. Kai doesn't bring it up, so neither does she. She has no idea what she would say if she did, how he would react if she did.

As they walk into the city, strolling down deserted streets and looking for potential shops to raid, Jinora knows that they've been treading a fine line between carefully detached sorta-friends and a pair of survivors only together out of convenience. Jinora isn't sure what she wants them to be. She just wants to live. But maybe she wants him to live, too.

"Is it in range?" Jinora whispers, and she sees Kai nod. He pulls the trigger and the zombie some ten feet away from them crumples like a doll. All Jinora can hear is her ragged breathing and the ringing of the gun in her ears, her heart pounding. The zombie's a Speedster, very fast and deadly. They always travel alone. When Kai finally rises, making sure the zombie truly is dead, and the bullet hit its target, Jinora follows his lead, trailing close behind.

Cautiously, he approaches the Speedster. The bullet pierced its thin skin, black blood splurging from the wound and onto the black pavement, its long fingers and limbs lying limp.

"It's dead," he announces, breaking into a shaky smile.

Jinora's surprised at how calm he sounds. How much skill he has with a gun. The teacher back in the Sanctuary had always stressed how hard it was to kill Speedsters, especially with a gun, since they moved so fast. But Kai had done it. And strangely enough, Jinora feels sort of proud of him.

She looks away from the zombie, willing her shaking hands to stay still, and notices a clothing store nearby. "Let's go in there," she points towards it. Her arm stops trembling. One of the windows is shattered, but it looks mostly deserted. Most of the zombies hang out around things like grocery stores, but clothing stores? Not so much. "New clothes will be good. Besides, it's getting colder. Winter will be here before we know it."

Kai shrugs. "Why not?"

Jinora grabs his hand and pulls her along with her towards the store, which she's right about: it is empty, completely devoid of zombies.

But it's full of clothes. Jinora makes a beeline for the Women's Section, quickly finding clothes in her size. She tries to get gray, green and brown clothes, a feeble attempt at camouflage in the wilderness, but it's better than nothing. Then, she goes into the change rooms and completely strips. It's a relief to have all of her dirty clothes and old underwear finally off her body.

It's a fresh bra and fresh pants and socks and shoes and and shirts and she's never felt more grateful for clothes in her entire life. When she finally steps out of the change room, Kai has already changed, donning a man's tank top, his usual two sizes too big jacket, and fresh jeans and boots. "Finally," he mumbles, looking up at her, and then freezes.

Jinora doesn't know why, examining herself in her mirror. She's wearing a simple dark green tank top, a gray jacket that's cozy but not too warm. Her old jeans were too ratty, so she pulled on some long, black leggings that are comfy, and she'll be able to grow into as well.

When Kai doesn't stop staring, Jinora self-consciously tucks a strand of hair behind her ear. "You can't stop staring now, you know," she says, trying to inject annoyance into her voice, and hopes he doesn't notice her flaming cheeks.

Kai snaps out of it. "Oh, um, sorry Jin." He's blushing and Jinora tries to not feel too pleased with herself. "And er, I know it's not really the same, but wanna go get some coffee with me?"

Jinora slaps him lightly on the arm. "Only if you're paying, cheapskate."

That gets a laugh out of him. "Of course Jin," he says, fondly smiling at her. Jinora's face feels warm. The coffee they get is stale, bitter brown sludge, too frightening looking to drink, but the warmth Jinora feels at the sight of Kai's smile never fades.

They take a shortcut down an alley in the afternoon. There's a large green box for garbage pushed up against a very high fence, but on the other side, through the fence's chain-mail, Jinora can see a grocery store in the distance: food. And, sure enough, zombies are everywhere. Kai goes to move but Jinora throws her hand out. "We can't just barge in there, we don't have the numbers..."

Kai settles back down. "Any ideas then Jin?"

They need some sort of distraction. Jinora racks her brain for one, anything, that can be safe and smart but effective, when she hears Kai hiss, "Jin!"

A loud clacking noise reaches her ears and Jinora freezes. The noise is getting louder, with low growls added to sounds of tongue gnashing teeth. Clackers are on their way, and from the sound of it, there's quite a few, far more than the usual packs of two or three. Jinora whips out her knife, clutching it tightly, her heart pounding in her throat as the first Clacker slinks into the alleyway.

She catches a glimpse of its horrible face, with blind eyes of white and bones sticking out of its skin. More follow, even when Kai shoots two dead. "There's too many," Jinora breathes, as even more of the Clackers flood the alleyway. It's hard to count, but there's at least fifteen. "We got to get out of here. Cover me."

Kai nods, clenching his jaw. A Clacker reaches for her and Jinora drives her knife into its chest before pulling it out, but doesn't look back as she climbs on top of the garbage box. The metal lid creaks under her weight but she doesn't have time to test her plan out. She turns around to see Kai, struggling with the keeping the zombies at bay, panic spreading over his face.

"Come on," she reaches out a hand to help pull him onto the garbage box. If he can get up, they can both get over the fence. It'll slow down the Clackers at the very least and give them time to find somewhere safe to hide. Kai hands her his gun so he can have cover fire while his back is turned. With shaking hands, Jinora fires off bullets; some of them hit their mark, but most of them miss and only cause the Clackers to stumble backwards.

Kai struggles to get his footing, his feet scraping uselessly against against the metal sides and Jinora tries to give him more room, but the garbage box lid is cramped and fragile. Jinora gives his hand another tug and he manages to pull himself up onto the lid; they're almost nose-to-nose. Jinora has no time to feel flustered as she gives Kai back his gun and he whirls around firing off on the Clackers, who are still closing in.

A Clacker swipes at her foot but Jinora kicks it away and Kai finishes it off with a bullet to the head. The Clacker crashes into two more zombies. It's still not enough.

Treading carefully, Jinora edges towards the fence. She hoists herself up and swings one leg over, panting heavily and glancing back at Kai. He's trying to get closer to the fence, but the Clackers are starting to claw their way up onto the garbage lid. He only has a minute or two at most to get to the fence; Jinora doesn't know if he'll make it. He'll need cover - cover she can't provide from her place of relative safety.

But if she drops back down, she'll be dropping back into the middle of all of the danger. Is it worth it? She could leave him. She should leave him. It's smarter, it's safer. She'll live. But he won't. Can she live with that? After all, this world isn't kind, so why should she be? Kai's always acted like their alliance would be temporary too, born out of convenience but to be cut off when it became a liability.

And Kai's become... she's not sure what he's become. But she isn't sure if he's worth it. Is he worth risking her life for? If he was in her position, would he risk his life for her? Is putting her life on the line worth possibly saving his? What if something goes wrong and they both die, her risk for nothing...

Jinora looks down at Kai, who looks hurt and sad but not surprised when he catches her eye, and Jinora knows what she's going to do.

A/N: I am evil, but reviews will help me update faster. I'm not that inhumane.