Control

I wanted to spend the day hiding in my bedroom, tucked into bed with Alcide's arms around me, but I couldn't stop thinking about the disaster that was my living room and kitchen. I knew that Sookie and Bill had removed the bodies, but there were still blood stains on the carpet, holes in the walls, and splintered wood fragments from the broken front door. I knew that the minute I stepped out of the sanctuary of my bedroom I would have to relive the night all over each time I saw it until I did something about it. I also didn't want to sit and only be able to focus on the energy that was coursing through me with the intensity of a tidal wave. The more I thought about it the more I felt it flex inside of me, begging to be let free. The urge to use it was strong. Like a calling that I didnt want to answer. I barely was able to keep a hold of it. I worried about going out in public, but felt that if I just pushed it to the back of my mind then the urge to use it would ease up a bit.

I took a quick shower and got dressed, after asking Alcide to accompany me to the local hardware store. I used the money Eric had given me for my "work" in Dallas to buy a new front door and framing wood as well as some kits to fix any holes, paint, and industrial strength carpet cleaner. Alcide treated me to a late lunch before taking me back home, doing his best to try and cheer me up. I appreciated his efforts and did my best to smile to make him feel that they were working, but inside I didn't feel any better. I was still in danger. Eric was now in danger also, and I had powers inside of me that I was struggling to control. I had also lost Connor, the only person that could teach me how to use those powers and anything else about myself that I didn't understand. And after the extremely realistic dream I had about my 'fairy godmother' I only had more questions. Was I really some fairy princess? Was I Were there really fairy people counting on me to save them? My life was a total mess.

When Alcide and I reached my house it was nearing sun down. I didn't waste any time getting started on cleaning and Alcide happily went about fixing my door and the holes in the walls. It really paid to have a contractor for a boyfriend. When I finally finished removing all traces of the events from the night before and Alcide finished replacing the door and fixing the holes, it was well after nightfall. No vampires or werewolves had come calling…yet. The mere thought of it made the energy flare within me. I tried to force the thoughts of vampires and werewolves to the back of my mind and focused on my rumbling stomach instead. I put the cleaning supplies away and trudged into the kitchen, my stomach growling in hunger.

"Are you hungry?" I called to Alcide who was still putting his tools away.

"Starved," he answered.

"I could cook something, we could watch a movie, hold down the fort?" I offered. "Wait for some more vampires or werewolves to show up and attempt to kill us." I added softly under my breath.

Alcide appeared in the door way of my kitchen with a sour look on his face. "Don't talk like that, Chase."

"You heard that?" I asked incredulously, looking at him over my shoulder.

Alcide smirked, pointing to his ear. "Werewolf enhanced hearing."

I shrugged innocently and shut the fridge after nothing caught my eye. "Well it's the truth. Debbie wants my head on a spike and Russell wants me as his pet. I'm still in danger. They could come at any minute now that the sun is down. They know exactly where I live."

Alcide frowned stepping into the kitchen. "Chase…"

"I know what you are going to say," I said cutting him off. "I know that you will do everything in your power to keep me safe and I appreciate and love that about you, but you have a life too Alcide. You cant be in Bon Temps every second. And I's so vulnerable here in my own home. The place that I am supposed to feel the safest. Vampires and werewolves can just show up whenever they like."

Alcide sighed and leaned against the counter. "Well have you thought about moving?" he asked.

"Moving?" I repeated. I hadn't thought of moving. It was the only place that I had called home besides my parent's home.

"Yeah. I mean…think about everything that has happened since you lived here," Alcide continued stepping towards me and wrapping his arms around my waist. "You lived here when your best friend died, you and your brother were attacked in this house," he hesitated for a moment before continuing. "You watched your father die in this house, Chase. Do you really want to continue living here? You have said to me many times that you would like a fresh start. Maybe the first step for that is moving out of here."

I couldn't lie. He had a point. A very valid and reasonable point. Although the thought of truly moving into a place of my own unsettled my stomach it was a good idea. But I knew that Bon Temps was a small town and there wasn't very many places for rent.

"There aren't many options for renting here in Bon Temps. The only reason Cassandra and I moved here was because Shreveport was too expensive and her parents already had this house here from when they lived here. There's not a big real estate market in Bon Temps," I counteracted.

"Well maybe you should check out some places outside of Bon Temps."

"Shreveport is too expensive," I continued. I also don't want to move any closer to Eric Northman, I thought bitterly.

"How about Jackson?"

I felt my stomach flutter and I looked up at Alcide slowly. Was he saying what I thought he was saying?

Alcide's face fell slightly at my surprised look. "No, I don't mean move in with me. I know it's way too soon for that. But Jackson is reasonably priced. There's plenty of apartments for rent. There's colleges, diners if you want to continue waitressing… and we'd be closer to each other."

His proposal came as a surprise. He was right, it was way too soon to move in together. We hadn't even gotten to go on a real date yet, but it didn't mean that I couldn't move to Jackson. I tried to think of what was keeping me in Bon Temps now that Cassandra was gone and was bitter to find that I couldn't really think of anything. As much as I loved Bon Temps and the few people that I had come to know in it, it wasn't enough to make me want to stay. Jackson wasn't too far that I couldn't maintain my friendship with Sookie. I could also make new friends in Jackson. I could find another job in Jackson. I could go back to school. I could try and have a normal relationship as possible with a man who sometimes turned into a wolf. I could start over.

I felt a smile touch my lips. "Maybe tomorrow we could drive up there and check some places out?"

"Sounds like a plan to me," Alcide said before leaning down to kiss me.

"Good," I replied with a smile, looking up into his brown eyes.

I saw something change in his eyes, a flash of yellow crossed the brown, and his mouth was back on mine. I felt my body tense in surprise, but relaxed into him, pressing my body harder into his. He felt incredible against me, my curves fitting perfectly against him, his hands gripping the flesh of my hips tightly. I wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him closer and my mouth opened offering him an invitation. His tongue accepted, darting in to find my own, and massage mine. My heart began to pound in my chest and heat surged through me, causing the energy inside of me to flare excitedly. I did my best to ignore it, to push the thought of it the back of my mind and keep a tight hold on it. I focused instead on the feeling of Alcide's that had left my hips to explore, running up and down my back, grasping a handful of my ass.

"Bedroom?" he growled against my lips.

I nodded feverishly. He grabbed my hips again, lifting me as if I were light as a feather. I wrapped my legs around his waist and he turned taking quick strides into my bedroom. He kissed me again as he stepped into my bedroom, both of us falling onto my bed. His weight against me was bliss and I gasped when his mouth left mine and trekked down to my neck. I felt his teeth nip my skin, making my back arch in response. The energy flared again at my excitement and my teeth clenched. I could feel it pulsing now, matching the beat of my heart.

"You smell so damn good," Alcide breathed, his mouth going lower, nimble fingers lifting my shirt to expose skin.

I struggled to concentrate on him and the task that I desperately wanted to happen. But the energy was throbbing now, just as my core was. I was scared of what would happen if I let loose. I didn't want to hurt Alcide. There was nothing sexy about tossing your boyfriend across the room with your mind. Alcide's fingers undoing the button of my jeans brought my attention back to him. I lifted my head to watch him slide my jeans down my hips. His eyes were full of lust and the look of him alone was enough to bring me to the edge.

God I need this, I thought pushing my hips up to assist him.

He tossed my jeans over his shoulder, trailing kisses up my inner thigh. I shut my eyes and allowed my head to fall back on the bed, resisting the urge to squirm. His mouth reached the part of me that throbbed with need and the warmth of his breath through the material of my panties sent sparks through me. The energy flared again and I felt it crackle along my skin. I sat up in a panic, pushing Alcide away. He fell off the bed, looking up at me in surprise when he landed in a sitting position on my floor.

"Whoa, what's wrong?" he panted looking at me in surprise.

"I don't want to hurt you," I said trying to catch my breath.

"Chase, what the hell are you talking about?"

"I was getting really…worked up…and I'm afraid I will lose control and something bad will happen."

"Lose control?" he questioned.

"Yes, this power inside of me. It's…strong…and it feels like it always wants to be let out and I'm just afraid of what I will do if I lose it."

Alcide sighed, rising to his feet. "Chase, you won't-."

"You don't know that," I cut in. "I don't want to hurt you."

Alcide sighed again, putting his hands on his hips. "Well… let's take it slowly then?"

I wanted too. I wanted nothing more than to lose myself in him and forget the world even if it was for just a fleeting moment. But I also didn't want to hurt him. I knew he was tough and healed quickly, but it didn't change the insecurities that I felt. I bit my lip, trying to exercise restraint.

"I can't," I answered shaking my head. "Not until I get a better hold on this. I'm sorry."

Alcide growled softly, in what I assumed was frustration, but nodded. "Okay...well how about I run out and get some dinner then?"

I smiled weakly at him, feeling guilty for not being able to satisfy him like every cell in my body wanted to do. "That would be great," I replied grabbing my pillow to cover my lower half.

"Anything in particular you'd like?"

Your naked body on top of mine.

"Surprise me."

"Okay I'll be back in a little bit," he replied leaning towards me to pass a very restrained kiss across my lips.

"Okay," I answered quietly.

I watched him walk out of my bedroom, his body tense, and waited until I heard the sound of the front door opening and closing before rising to my feet. I put my jeans back on and headed into the living room turning on the television for some background noise. The nightly news was on and I didn't bother changing it, not planning to pay much attention to it anyway. I felt restless and busied myself with cleaning up until I heard my cellphone ringing. I retrieved it from the dining room table and recognized the number on the caller id as Sookie's.

"Sookie, hi," I answered walking back to my couch and taking a seat.

"Hi…is this a bad time?" she asked hesitantly. "I know it's late."

"No, I am just waiting for Alcide to get back with some food," I replied.

"Oh, how are…things?"

"Things are…." I paused. "Things are….things are the same…"

"Well would you mind if I unloaded some stuff on you," she asked me cautiously. "I know you have been through a lot, but you are the only person that can understand what I am going through. And I think I know what we are."

I felt a lump form in my throat. "What we are?"

"Yes. I found a file on me in Bills things and it turns out that he had done a little digging into me to find out what I was so that he can protect me better. And since you and I both had the same problem with donor blood and our abilities are similar, I'm thinking we are the same thing."

I swallowed the lump. "And that is?"

"Fucking fairies. I'm only a tiny part, the human in me has dwindled it down. But its why my blood is so sweet and why I can read minds. And I think you are one too."

I huffed quietly. Well she wasn't wrong. I was part fairy. Possibly fairy princess, if that dream (which I was beginning to believe was not a dream at all) was true at all. I contemplated telling Sookie about the dream, but thought better of it. "Well you are partially accurate Sookie."

She hesitated. "Partially accurate?"

"Yes, I've know what I was for a little while."

"You have?"

"Yes, I am half fae and half witch," I answered. It felt weird saying it out loud so casually.

"Why didn't you tell me?" she asked. Her tone sounded a bit hurt.

"I'm sorry. I have been dealing with a lot."

"What does that mean for you? Being half fairy and half witch?"

I sighed and ran a hand through my hair. "It means that I am one of the strongest and rarest beings on the planet…or so my biological father told me…and it probably means I am always going to be in danger if I stay around vampires."

Sookie was quiet for a long moment. I worried for a moment that she had hung up for some reason until I heard her sigh. "We both got dealt shitty cards."

"This is true," I agreed.

I glanced at the television pausing when I saw Russell Edgington sitting at the anchor desk where a gray haired man had just been moments before. I felt my jaw drop and the phone slipped out of my hand as I realized that he was holding a spine. I reached for the remote, not daring to take my eyes off the screen as I turned up the volume.

"-been a vampire for nearly 3,000 years and now the American Vampire League wishes to perpetrate the notion that we are just like you. And I suppose in a few small ways we are. We are narcissists. We only care about getting what we want. No matter what the cost. Just like you. Global warming. Perpetual war. Toxic Waste. Child labor. Genocide. Torture. That's a small price to pay for your SUV's, your flat screen TVs, your blood diamonds, your designer jeans, your ABSURD GARRISH MCMANSIONS!," he paused for a moment and I could vaguely hear Sookie still calling my name on the phone. "Futile symbols of permanence to quell your quivering spineless souls." My stomach dropped as he looked at the spine in his hands before carelessly tossing it over his shoulder and leaned forward on the desk clasping his hands. "But no. In the end. We are nothing like you. We are immortal," he continued chuckling. "Because we drink the true blood. Blood that is living, organic, and human," he paused to taste the blood on his hand. My stomach churned in disgust. "And that is the truth the AVL wishes to conceal from you, because let's face it, eating people is tough sell these days. So they put on their friendly faces to pass their beloved VRA, but make no mistake mine is the true face of vampire!" he leaned back in his chair with a sadistic smile, his arms spread wide. "Why would we seek equal rights? You are NOT our equals. We want to eat you. After we eat your children….Now time for the weather. Tiffany?"

"Holy shit."

I jumped at the sound of Alcide's voice, feeling the energy spike, but managing to keep a hold on it. He was standing in my open front door staring at the television in horror. His eyes finally looked at me, filled with surprise and confusion and I couldn't think of anything else to say besides…

"What the fuck was that?"