we the great and small

stand on a star

and blaze a trail of desire

through the darkening dawn

v.

The day after Christmas, Eponine took Gavroche shopping. Saying he was in heaven was an absolute understatement. Granted, he could have done without trying on all the clothes, but once Eponine told him about the Best Buy gift card that would come after, he was more than cooperative. She kept the iPad he bought at the end of the day because both of them knew that if he took it home, it would be gone as soon as their father saw it.

The next day, she had lunch with Cosette, and Eponine had never needed her advice more.

"I have a problem," she confessed as she pushed her potato salad around her plate.

"Oh? Like, a serious problem or just something you need to talk about to make it better?" Cosette asked curiously.

"I don't know. It could turn into something serious if I'm not careful."

"Well, what is it?"

"I might, maybe, possibly have some really crazy serious feelings for someone." Eponine sighed and pushed her plate away. She'd eaten enough, and every time she thought about Enjolras in the last few days, her stomach had tied itself into knots. He had been a complete gentleman the other night, and once again, they had a good time together, even while doing something as boring as watching TV and talking.

Cosette squealed excitedly. "And does said person happen to be a ridiculously good looking lawyer?"

"That also happens to be my boss? Yes. So, please – tell me how that is squeal worthy, because honestly it's kind of making me feel like shit."

"Oh, Eponine." Cosette sighed and looked at her sympathetically. "Don't be so hard on yourself. It's not wrong to have feelings for him."

"It is! I work for him, Cosette. I am not that kind of person. What would people think if they found out I was interested in him?" Eponine covered her eyes and groaned. "Every single person in that office would think I'm a complete slut, probably that I'd planned all along to try and hook up with him, and I would lose my job."

"Wait, have you hooked up with him?" Cosette leaned forward eagerly.

"No! I haven't. And I'm not going to."

"Are you sure?"

Eponine told Cosette everything that had happened, starting with the night of the business dinner turned date. By the time she finished telling her about his Christmas gift, Cosette's eyes looked suspiciously watery. "Wow. Eponine, that's incredible. That's one of the sweetest, most thoughtful things I've ever heard! I mean, seriously, I don't think you really have any idea about him..."

"What do you mean?"

"Granted, I don't know him as well as the guys, but from everything Marius has said, Enjolras just doesn't really date. They wondered if he was actually gay for a while, but Courfeyrac showed up early at his house once and there was a girl there that he had obviously spent the night with. But what he just did for you? That sounds like some serious feelings. People don't just do that for someone they don't care about!"

Eponine rolled her eyes skeptically. "He would. He's incredibly kind, way more than I think anyone knows. And we also haven't really known each other that long. But...I mean, I know I have feelings for him, and he's given every indication that he feels the same way for me, so I think you're right. I just don't know what to do. Ugh, this is so confusing."

"I don't know that it's really that confusing," Cosette said gently, "I think you just need to decide what you're going to do about it."

"I feel like I don't have many options..."

"Well, let's think about it. I guess you could always sleep with him and start a relationship, and hope that no one at the office finds out...and wait for it to blow up in your face. You could be strictly friends, and keep things professional. You could ignore him completely except for at work and make it clear to him that you can't see him outside of it if you want to keep your job. Or...you could try to find another job so that you can actually date him and not be scared of the repercussions?" Cosette ticked each choice off on her fingers as she said them.

"I don't like any of those options," Eponine mumbled. "The last one is the most appealing, but what if I can't find something else that's as good? I have to keep making the same amount of money; I'm finally getting somewhere financially, and by the end of February, I'm going to have enough saved to get an apartment for me and Gavroche. I can't risk losing that. Gavroche is my number one priority and I can't do anything that might hurt him."

"Well, if you can't risk losing your job, then option number one is off the table, too," Cosette said sternly.

"I know. So that leaves either being just friends or giving him the brush off."

"Can I tell you what I think you should do?"

"Don't you always?" Cosette pretended offense and lightly kicked her underneath the table.

"Not unless you ask! And I think that you should be friends with him. You like each other, and while you do work for him now, you're not planning on it being forever. So, if you haven't met someone else by the time you quit or he hasn't, the potential to make it something more is there. And by that time, you should know him well enough to know whether or not you want to go there. Now doesn't that sound like the most grown up choice?"

"It does. The thought of being with him is like...God, I don't even know. I've never, ever felt so attracted to someone, and not just in a physical way. It's going to be really hard to be just friends with him, but it's better than the thought of seeing him at work every day and pretending I have no interest in him at all. I don't think even I'm a good enough actress for that." Eponine sighed dramatically and nudged Cosette's leg with her foot. "Thanks for listening to me. Again."

The next Monday at Gavroche's soccer game, Eponine did a double take as she noticed Enjolras walking across the field towards her. "You have a habit of turning up in unexpected places," she remarked as he got closer.

"Hey, I'll have you know I was invited." Enjolras waved to Courfeyrac and sat down next to her on the bleachers.

"By who?"

"Your brother – he called yesterday to thank me for the Christmas gifts and asked if I wanted to come. Of course I said yes."

Enjolras nudged her shoulder with his and she wrinkled her nose. "Wait, Gavroche called you? How the hell did he get your number?"

"You didn't give it to him? I figured you told him to call and say thank you."

"Nope, it wasn't me. I was going to make him get you a thank you card. I have no idea how he got your number. Did he harass you too bad?"

"He said nothing you would disapprove of," Enjolras said reassuringly. "He did tell me he's having trouble with math and social studies, though. I may have told him I would tutor him on Thursday afternoons at your apartment. If that's okay with you."

Eponine's eyes widened. Where did this man come from? Was he a fucking saint? "What?! Gabe, you don't have to do that! You're so busy with work, I don't even know that you have the time."

"I should make the time," Enjolras said. "I've been working so much the last few years I haven't had time for much else, but maybe it's time that stopped. Just a bit."

"Maybe you're right. When you're actually out in the world, you're a lot less boring than I originally thought you were," Eponine teased.

They watched the rest of Gavroche's game and made small talk, and true to his word, Enjolras left work early starting that Thursday and began tutoring Gavroche, who, come to find out, had innocently gotten Enjolras' number from Courfeyrac. Though she hadn't intended for it to become a habit, cooking dinner for Enjolras and Gavroche on Thursdays became a quickly established routine. She didn't mind at all since she actually liked to cook, and Enjolras admitted he rarely got home cooked meals since he had no clue how to cook himself. They were comfortable together, and it was easier than she imagined to just be his friend. He never made her feel awkward or threatened in any way, and she trusted him completely because of it.

At the beginning of March, after successfully saving enough money all on her own, Eponine moved into a new apartment with Gavroche. Her parents had no problem with him leaving – her mom even went to his middle school with her and officially changed his address and emergency contact information. The less the Thenardiers had to do with him, the better, apparently, and while it made Eponine sick to see how little her parents cared about their children, she was ready for the responsibility of handling Gavroche all on her own.

Every single person Eponine had met first through Marius, and then Enjolras, showed up to help her move, some even bringing pieces of furniture from their own homes for them to keep, since it was very different trying to fill a two bedroom apartment with furniture rather than a studio. Jehan and Grantaire even helped her refinish an old beat up kitchen table and chairs, which ended up being her favorite piece of furniture in the apartment.

On their first night in their new home, Eponine sat Gavroche down and decided to lay some ground rules.

"Okay, kid. So, I know we spend a lot of time together, but it's been a while since you actually lived with me. I don't want to be a total hard-ass, but I also don't really care whether or not you think I'm cool or whatever, so..."

"Well, I already think you're crazy, so..." Gavroche grinned cheekily and propped his feet up on the kitchen table.

Eponine knocked them down before saying seriously, "Okay, be serious for a second. We have to set some rules, and I know you aren't very used to having any. But I promise I'm not going to say anything unreasonable. Okay?"

When Gavroche nodded, Eponine continued. "First, I'm getting you your own cell phone." She held up a hand when he gasped excitedly and said, "Hold up, there's a catch! There's a limit on it – you're only going to get 250 minutes of talk time a month, and you have a limit of 250 texts. For now. We'll see if we need to add on in a month or two, but until then, if you go over either of those things, you will be paying the extra on the bill in the form of manual labor. Got it?"

"Sure. What else?"

"You have to call me every single time you want to go somewhere. I know you're used to wandering wherever you want when I'm not around, but that needs to stop now that you're living here because I can't handle worrying about you every five minutes. So, if you want to go home with a friend after school, that's fine, as long as you call and tell me first. And I need to start meeting your friend's parents. If I think somewhere isn't appropriate for you to be, then I reserve the right to tell you that you can't go there."

Gavroche frowned at that. "Uh...okay. I guess."

"Seriously, Gav, as long as you call me, I really don't think that will be a big deal. And last...as usual, school comes first. You're used to that one, though, with soccer, so homework needs to be done before you do anything else at night. As long as you follow those basic rules and clean up after yourself around here, we should be okay. Any questions?"

"Do I get to have friends come here?"

"Sure – although I'll warn you. Some parents might not like it that I'm so young, so they might be weird about it. But I'll try to win them over."

"Do you get to have friends over?" Gavroche wiggled his eyebrows suggestively and Eponine blushed.

"Gavroche! What the hell?"

"I don't mind if you do. You know, if you and Enjolras, or Gabe as you call him, want to have a little sleepover, it's cool. I know he likes you. And I'm pretty sure you want to jump him."

"Oh my God. We are done with this conversation. Done!" Eponine covered her ears and hurried out of the kitchen as Gavroche made kissy noises behind her.

In early April, Enjolras waltzed out of his office one day at 5:30, once everyone but Eponine was gone, and perched on the edge of her desk. "So, are you going to ask me why I'm in a good mood today?"

Eponine looked up at him and narrowed her eyes. "You do seem unusually joyful. What happened?"

"I just bought a house."

Eponine gasped. "What?! No way! I didn't even know you were looking!"

"I didn't tell anyone. I didn't know if it would actually happen or not. But yeah, pending inspections and whatnot, I close in 10 days – quick closing brought the price down. I'm going to go sign papers tomorrow."

"Wow. Where is it? Is it nice?"

Enjolras winced and slowly shook his head. "Uh...well. Nice isn't really the right word for it. More like I'm going to have to gut the whole thing and start from scratch. I don't think it's been touched since the '70s."

Eponine laughed. "It sounds like a big job, but it could be fun to decorate and choose all new materials and stuff. Congratulations, by the way."

"Thanks." Enjolras hesitated a minute, then said quickly, "I was hoping maybe you would help me with some of that? I don't have the best taste, and I saw what you did with your apartment even with not a lot of resources...but...Is that weird? Is it weird to ask?"

"It's not weird," Eponine reassured him. (Even thought it was a little weird – it felt very much like task a 'girlfriend' would do). "I'd be happy to help."

And help she did; within three weeks, she had helped Enjolras pick out new hardwood floors, appliances, and convinced him to go with light colored quartz countertops for the kitchen. Whenever Courfeyrac saw her, he had started to call her "Enj's wifey" just to grate on her nerves. The worst part, however, was the way he egged Gavroche on, who had started to call Enjolras "my new daddy" because he liked to snicker at how red Eponine's face got every time he did. Despite that, she knew it came from a good place – Gav's adoration of Enjolras had only grown since their tutoring sessions started, and it was obvious that even with his effervescent personality and love of life, Gavroche still longed for the stability that some of his friends had.

One night after work, Enjolras brought her to the house for the first time since renovations began, but he made her close her eyes until they were in the kitchen. He held one hand and kept the other on the small of her back, helping her navigate around all of the construction in the living room.

"Okay. You can open them now." Eponine opened her eyes and gaped at the kitchen, squeezing Enjolras' hand harder.

"Oh my gosh. Whoa! This turned out so perfect!" She ran one hand over the countertops and randomly started opening cabinets, which she noticed were conspicuously missing any food. Typical. "Gabe, this is so, so beautiful! It's completely transformed."

"I'm glad you like it, since you talked me into most of it."

"I think you need to go to the grocery store, though." She peeked at him from around the door of the refrigerator, which was almost as empty as the cabinets, except for a lone bottle of water on one shelf.

"Eh, yeah. Maybe I should actually learn to cook now that I have this beautiful kitchen." Enjolras shrugged and leaned against the counter, watching her with amusement.

"If I had a kitchen like this, I would cook every single day. It wouldn't even feel like a chore here." Eponine closed the fridge and walked back over to Enjolras, hopping onto the counter next to him, which put them mostly at eye level with each other.

"Hm, well...maybe I could fire you at work and hire you here as my personal chef. Then I could get out of cooking forever." He leaned closer to her, his hand dangerously close to her knee.

Eponine bit her lip, feeling the temperature rise about ten degrees, but she ignored the warning signs going off in her head. They had done so good over these last few months at just being friends, but it was getting harder by the day. They had both been finding excuses to innocently touch each other – on the shoulder, hands brushing, legs touching while they were at dinner – but while they were at the office, Enjolras avoided her like the plague, and Eponine was glad; she had a feeling that even though they hadn't really talked about their relationship since before Christmas, they were on the same page when it came to how to conduct themselves at work. It was pure torture, though, being so close to him all the time and not being able to do anything about it. (Although her vibrator was getting plenty of use every night.) And she was getting closer and closer to just giving in, damn the consequences. She had never been a patient person, and she had never had someone consume her thoughts so completely as Enjolras did.

"Personal chef, right. You're insufferable enough there with other people around at the office. I'd practically be a slave stuck here in your house." Eponine lightly shoved his shoulder, but Enjolras caught her hand and unexpectedly pulled her forward on the counter, moving his body between her knees and resting his hands on her waist.

Eponine's breath caught in her throat as she laid her hands on his shoulders to steady herself. This isn't good, she thought, but fuck, it really is.

This was the most physical contact they'd ever had. The desire between them immediately pulsed in the air and her heart felt like it was going to beat straight out of her chest.

"Insufferable, huh?" he asked lightly, but his gaze was anything but light as he looked at her. She stared back at him, reaching up to slowly run her fingers along the stubble on his jaw. She just couldn't resist - he looked so good, and she felt almost drunk at this sudden closeness. Eponine wasn't thinking anymore, not about anything but him. Her whole body tingled from the few places he touched.

"Yeah," she managed to squeak out. She couldn't help but wonder what his lips would feel like moving against her own, or what it would feel like to run her hands down his chest, and then lower... Enjolras' own eyes were on her mouth as his thumbs gently stroked her sides.

"Can I..." Enjolras began hesitantly, and before he could finish the thought, Eponine swiftly nodded.

"Yes. Yes." It was obvious what he wanted, and even though she'd been telling herself for months not to let it happen, it was impossible to refuse when he was right in front of her and as desperate for her as she was for him.

Enjolras leaned forward slowly and Eponine closed her eyes, desire pooling in her belly as his nose lightly brushed hers. His lips were only millimeters away when the moment was suddenly broken as his phone began ringing obnoxiously next to them on the counter. The most colorful curse words she knew started racing through her mind, but she was too shocked to do anything but whimper in disappointment. Enjolras groaned, but instead of pulling away, he sighed in defeat and pulled her closer, resting his forehead against her shoulder.

"Damn it."

Eponine squeezed her eyes shut, still silently cursing whatever God had set up that fortuitous little moment. The air had shifted again, the ringing of the phone apparently bringing back her own ability to reason. The rational side of her knew that interruption was a good thing, as it prevented the exact moment she had tried to avoid for months. Still, she couldn't bear to let go of Enjolras, either, and instead ran her fingers through his hair and down his back, trying to memorize how he felt against her.

"We shouldn't do this, should we?" he mumbled against her shoulder. There was no mistaking the disappointment in his tone.

"No. I want to, but we shouldn't." Eponine closed her eyes and asked sadly, "But can we stay like this for a minute before we decide not to do it again?"

"Please."

Enjolras buried his face in her hair and held her tightly. She fit perfectly against him, a sentiment she had never really understood before, but did now. She would have been content to just stop time, but after a few minutes, Enjolras reluctantly pulled away. He smiled crookedly at her and brushed a piece of hair behind her ear. "I'm sorry; that was definitely crossing one of those lines we said we wouldn't. And it was my fault."

"It's okay. It's not like I wasn't a willing participant."

They looked at each other for a few more moments before Enjolras said with regret, "So...I'll drive you home?"

Eponine nodded and let him help her off the counter. They didn't talk again until they were almost halfway to her apartment.

"This probably isn't the best time to bring it up, but I actually have something to ask you," Enjolras finally said.

Eponine glanced at him. "What?"

"Do you have plans next month? At the end of May?"

"Uh, that's kind of vague. Do you have a specific date? And for what?"

Enjolras pulled up in front of her apartment and turned to face her. "It's for work – I have to spend ten days in New York for meetings and a few different cases I'm working on. I was hoping you could come with me, just for work purposes, I promise. I'll be a perfect gentleman. I swear to God I won't pull anything like that again. I won't put you in any position I shouldn't. We've been able to make it work as friends so far, and while you're working for me, I swear that's all...

Eponine reached over and covered his mouth with her hand. "Stop. Seriously. We're both adults, and we're fine. I'm not going to stop being friends with you because there's this other...thing...between us that shouldn't be. I can still be professional as your assistant and handle being your friend. So yes, I should be able to go at the end of May. My classes end on the tenth."

Enjolras sighed in relief. "Okay. Are you sure? If you're not sure, I can say that you can't go because of Gavroche and it won't be a big deal."

Eponine smiled. "Gabe, it's fine. I actually want to go. I've never been to New York! And, just so you know, May 22nd is my birthday. Will we be there for that?"

Enjolras' eyes lit up. "It is? I didn't know that. And yeah – we're supposed to be there May 19th through the 29th. Again, not to make things weird, but we can do something special for your birthday if you want?"

Eponine nodded. "Yeah. Of course, I'd love that."

"Okay, good. I'll let HR know and they'll get us tickets and hotel rooms and everything. And I'll see you tomorrow at work?"

"Absolutely. See you tomorrow." Eponine climbed out of the car and waved as Enjolras drove away, turning around and flopping down onto her back in the grass as soon as he was out of sight. "Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!"

Yep. Her damn vibrator would definitely be making another appearance shortly.

Ha. Fooled you last chapter and made you think the smut would be here, didn't I?

Hope y'all liked that little almost-kiss moment there, too. That was actually kind of painful to write - I really wanted to say screw it and make it into something more, but NO. I stuck to the plan!

I think this actually might be my most popular story? It's getting the most attention on tumblr of everything I've ever written, and I'm pulling in quite a few reviews here, too. I didn't expect that, so thank you! Honestly, getting such nice reviews and feedback feels great and very rewarding! Maybe that's why I'm churning out a chapter a day? I have no idea why that's happening, but I'll just keep writing! Enjoy the rest of the weekend. :)