"Rachel, if you want to live to see another day, you will back up right now!" My pants are covered in cherry slushy because Rachel decided it was a good idea to do an impromptu performance in the middle of the restaurant. Now I'm sitting here, with red stains all over my pants and Rachel invading my personal space.
Rachel doesn't seem to get the message because she is still in my bubble. "Santana, stop being so dramatic," she snaps.
"Oh... I'm being dramatic?" I say pointing my finger into my chest and standing up out of my chair. "That's big talk coming from someone who decided to take a vow of silence for a whole week because I said I didn't like Barbra Streisand!"
Rachel lets out a gasp, bringing her hand up to cover her heart. "You do not speak of Barbra," she says lowly. "You are to never speak her name. Those were the terms, Santana." She points her finger at me with a glare in her eyes.
In her defense, though I don't know why I am defending Berry, I did say that.
"Yeah, and I'm starting to wonder why I ever agreed to that. Those were the most peaceful seven days I have had since I've moved here."
Just then, Quinn and Brittany round the corner carrying trays with our food on it.
"What the hell is going on here? We could hear you across the restaurant," Quinn hisses setting the trays down and looking between the two of us. "Seriously, we were gone for like five minutes." She looks over to me and notices the stain on my pants. "Santana I have heard of PMS, but this is just ridiculous."
"Very funny Quinn," I grab a napkin off the table and continue to blot up the stain on my pants, but it's not really coming off. I am going to kill Rachel if I can't get this stain out. These are my go to pants. They're like the perfect pair of jeans. They fit just right and they make my ass look fantastic.
If they are ruined, I will have to find a new pair and I just don't think I am ready to let go yet. These are a once in a lifetime pair of pants.
I let out a grunt before storming off to the bathroom.
I may or may not still be a little flustered by what happened with Brittany earlier. It's all just so weird.
Brittany didn't really seem okay when we finally went to go get lunch, which is actually more of a dinner because it's really late in the afternoon now. I want to talk to her and ask if she is okay, but I don't know how. I've never actually cared about another person's problems before, aside from Quinn of course, so I don't really know what the rules are. Am I allowed to ask? Will she think I am prying? I only just met her today, it's not really my place.
I get to the bathroom and push the door open, heading straight for the paper towel dispenser and then to the sink. I give up after a few moments of trying to get the stain out. I set both of my hands on either side of the sink and take a few deep breaths to calm myself down.
"Santana?" is spoken softly through the door. I look over, of course, its Rachel.
"What," it comes out sharper than I intended, but I was hoping maybe someone else followed me in here.
"I thought this might help," she sits a cup down on the sink. I look into the cup and find some club soda in it. "I've made a lot of messes in my life," she looks down at the floor, finding her shoes more interesting than my reflection in the mirror.
"Gross. Rachel, I don't want to know what happens in the bedroom." Rachel snaps her head up and locks eyes with me in the mirror she giving me a death glare. "I'm just kidding." She narrows her eyes at me, like she is studying me or something. "Okay, I'm sorry."
This time her eyes widen. "You're what?"
"I will not say it again, I almost choked the first time."
She looks at me quizzically for a moment. "Apology accepted," she finally says. "I too would like to apologize for staging a dramatic rendition of 'total eclipse of the heart' and knocking over your slushy."
"Apology accepted."
"I'm going to hug you n-"
"Berry, if you touch me, so help me god," I say while holding out my hand to block her.
She puts her hands up in defense, while backing away saying, "okay, okay. Too far."
When I get back to our table, the spot next to Brittany is open. I celebrate a little in my head before taking a seat next to her. She smiles at me before sliding over in the booth, giving me space to sit down.
"You all good?" Quinn asks over a bit of her food.
"Yep," I say with a smile.
Most of the lunch is just Quinn and Rachel talking about nothing. I say a few words every now and then, but mostly keep my focus on Brittany. She is staring down at her food, just sort of picking at it, not really eating anything. It makes my heart hurt because I know what's wrong.
At one point I lean over to Brittany and ask if she is doing okay. She assures me that she is, but I can tell by the look on her face that she isn't. It was a ridiculous question for me to ask, I know she's not okay, but I didn't know what else to say. I wanted to be able to comfort her, I just didn't know how. All I know is that I wish that she never had to feel sadness in this world. I know that's unrealistic, I just wish there was a way I could make it a little bit better or at the very least take away some of her pain.
/
About a week has passed since I met Brittany and I can't seem to get the girl off my mind. I wake up earlier than I normally do this morning. I couldn't really sleep last night. All I could think about was Brittany. I have only known this girl for a week and already I can't get her off my mind. I only briefly saw her on Wednesday when I was getting back the movies I had lent to Rachel.
She seemed to be a little happier than she was before, but still a little off. It's weird because I don't really know her, but I just know that she is usually a happy person.
My mind kept replaying the almost kiss we shared, if you could even call it that.
What would have happened if Quinn didn't interrupt that night? I wanted to kiss her. Did she want the same thing?
This is crazy.
She didn't want to kiss me.
She couldn't.
I would never get that lucky. I'm not even sure if I really wanted to kiss her anyway. Of course I did. Who wouldn't? "This is insane," I say to myself. I need to get up before I over think this and my head explodes.
I get out of bed and make my way to the kitchen where Quinn is sitting, eating some pancakes. I see a stack on the counter. I smile to myself and go for the kill. They are chocolate chip. It's like a Sunday morning miracle.
"Sure Santana, eat my pancakes that I spent all morning making. No, I don't mind at all," Quinn greets me with a monotone voice.
"Like you could eat all of these by yourself," I bite back.
"How would you know? You are never up this early to see me eat breakfast. I could eat those and more for all you know." Quinn closes the book she is reading and gets up to put her plate in the sink. "Are you feeling okay Santana?" She asks as she puts a hand to my forehead.
"What?" I say and slap her hand away from my face. "Why?"
"Rachel told me Santana. She told me what you did last week, with Brittany."
What?! I knew Berry was sneaky, but I know I would have seen her or heard her if she was there. My eyes bug out of my head and my heartbeat picks up.
But wait…nothing happened. I wanted something to happen, but nothing did.
What does Rachel know? Did Brittany tell her? She probably thinks I am some kind of freak wanting to kiss her when I only just met her.
I relax a little and take a breath.
"What are you talking about?" I say as calmly as I can.
"You were nice. To Brittany." She says matter-of- factly, like the reason is the most obvious thing in the world.
Ohthankgod. I take a breath of relief. "Why the hell does that shock you guys so much?" I half yell. "You told me to be nice to her, so I was."
"Since when do you listen to us?" Quinn huffs.
"I dunno, maybe I had some sort of awakening? Maybe the devil has finally fled from my soul?" I say while shaking my hands above my head. Quinn narrows her eyes at me. "Besides, she's cool…and pretty funny too."
"She made you laugh?" Quinn asks with a shocked expression. "Like she told you a joke and you laughed? You didn't make some sarcastic comment?"
I nod my head because what the fuck? Why are they acting like it's some kind of crazy ass miracle that I would be nice to someone? I mean, sure, I am a bitch to 99% of the people I meet, but come on.
"What's that supposed to mean?" I ask with a confused look.
I do laugh…sometimes…if people aren't complete idiots.
"It's just...wow." Quinn goes to pour herself another cup of coffee. "Brittany must be made of magic or something."
"Quinn stop being so weird," I say as I shove a fork full of pancake into my mouth.
"You're the one being weird," she mutters. "Anyway, Rachel and I were gonna go help Mercedes find some new furniture. Did you want to come with us?" she asks as she takes a sip of her coffee.
"Uh- I think I am going to stay in and get some homework done," I say. I would tell her the truth and say that I actually have plans to have a movie marathon with Brittany today, but I don't want her acting even weirder about me. And I don't want to talk about it right now especially since I don't really know what's going on in my head.
Quinn's expression goes blank and she picks up her phone.
"What ar yo doin?" I ask over a mouth full of pancakes.
"I am calling the police. Clearly someone has abducted my best friend and replaced her with someone who gets up early, does homework on the weekend, and is actually nice."
I get up and snatch the phone out of her hand. "Fabray, I will skin you alive if you don't stop making fun of me. I just have a lot to do this week and I want to get a head start," I shrug.
Quinn grabs her phone back. "Okay," is all she says before she walks out of the kitchen. "But I still think that some evil spirit is taking over your body," she calls from the living room.
"What? That doesn't make sense. If I was nicer, then why would it be an evil spirit?"
"Because any evil spirit is still nicer than you."
"Quinn!" I yell and throw a ball of paper that was lying on the counter at her head.
"I am only kidding Santana. You know I love you."
"Whatever," I mumble and head back into my room. This is another reason I don't get out of bed before Quinn leaves. She always picks on me, but I always pick on her so I guess we are even.
/
It's about twelve fifteen when I hear a soft knock on the door. Quinn left about a half hour ago and Rachel went with her. So, I can only assume that it's Brittany. She didn't really say what time she would be stopping by and I guess she got directions form Rachel.
I get up and walk toward the door. When I open it, Brittany is standing there with a large smile on her face and a box of pizza.
"Hey," she breathes. "I brought pizza!" she looks excited. I am so glad to see that she isn't sad anymore. I may be a little abrasive sometimes, but I hate to see people hurting.
"Hi," I say back. "What kind of pizza did you bring?"
It smells so good and I feel my stomach start to grumble at the smell.
"Pepperoni, is that okay?" she asks timidly.
"Pepperoni is perfect!" I say grabbing the box from her and setting it on the table. "You want something to drink? Soda? Water?"
"I'll take water. Thanks." she says while sitting down.
I walk over to the cupboard above the sink and grab two glasses and fill each of them with water.
"We have to watch the movies in my room. This TV doesn't play blue ray. It's pretty old." I grab two plates and hand one to Brittany.
We get our pizza and then head to my room. I didn't really think about there not being somewhere to sit other than my bed. I don't usually have people in my room, but I guess it's okay. We're just watching a movie.
Brittany sits down and scoots toward the top of the bed so she can rest against the back board. I walk to the other side and do the same thing. My bed is kind of small so, we are almost touching- shoulder to shoulder.
"I like your room," she says to me while taking a look around the room, "it's cozy."
I don't know why but that makes my heart flutter a little bit. All she did was compliment my room, but its seems that her opinion of it is the only one to ever matter. Quinn hates my room and so does Rachel. They think it's too dark. My walls are a dark shade of red and I have black sheets. I think it's relaxing. "It suites you," she adds.
"Thanks," I say back. The side of my mouth twitching into a slight smile. Maybe I am imagining things, but I think Brittany just called me cozy. No, she definitely did, or maybe she didn't, but I'm gonna say that she did.
"So, which one is the first one again?" Brittany asks while taking a bite of her pizza. She quickly pulls the pizza from her mouth and begins fanning her tongue. "Shit that's hot." Brittany reaches for her water and quickly takes a few gulps, finishing with a relieved sigh.
"The Curse of the Black Pearl," I answer.
"Mr. Krab's daughter is in this?" Brittany asks in a serious voice. I look at her in confusion, my eyebrows furrowing together. "I'm kidding, I know Mr. Krab's daughter isn't black. She's grey." Brittany playfully nudges my shoulder and we both laugh together.
"Sadly, I don't think Mr. Krab's daughter will be making an appearance, but there is that monkey." I grab the remote from my nightstand and press play.
"Very true," she adds.
The movie starts and we are comfortably sitting next to each other on my bed.
On my bed.
Brittany is on my bed.
My eyes slide over to her, she is wearing shorts. Shorts. In this weather and she is on my bed. My eyes follow the length of her legs to the bottom of her shorts, I feel my body heating up at the sight.
Get it together Lopez, I chastise myself. I awkwardly cough. Brittany turns her head to look at me. I'm sure my cheeks are red. She can see the shame of leering written all over my face. Even my dark complexion can't hide this. Oh god.
"You alright?" she asks her beautiful blue eyes staring right into the very depths of my soul.
"Uh- y-yeah. Yep. All good over here," smooth Santana, smooth. I grab my water and take a sip to cool my body down. Except that it goes down the wrong pipe and I shoot up in a fit of coughs.
Brittany sits up in the same instant. "Santana, you okay?" I try to answer, but nothing comes out, my hand just continues to pound on my chest as I try to regain my breathing. "Just try to calm down," her voice is soft and reassuring. Brittany started rubbing circles on my back at one point, when I get my breathing under control I notice it and my body tenses up a bit.
Brittany must realize I have stopped coughing a while ago and she is still rubbing my back because she awkwardly coughs and scoots back to her spot on the bed. Her cheeks are tinged pink.
I have to stop embarrassing myself around her.
About half way through the movie Brittany's head somehow lands on my shoulder.
Friends cuddle. I see Quinn and Rachel snuggle up to each other sometimes. I'm not complaining though. She smells nice, like summer, and her body is keeping me warm. I like it.
She stays like this for the rest of the movie.
I try to find it in me to care, but the only thing I can think about is how I wouldn't mind if she stayed like this forever. I almost kick myself for thinking that because what the hell? I barely know her. I want to know her more though. I feel drawn to her. Like I can't help but think these things.
The end credits are playing, but she doesn't move and I don't really want her to either, so I just sit quietly until my butt starts to go numb. I notice that her breathing is really deep.
I think she fell asleep on me.
Before I do anything, I let myself look over her features while I can. She is so, so beautiful and she looks like an angel. I really don't want to wake her up, but I really can't feel my butt either.
"Britt," I say as gently as I can. She stirs a little before slowly stretching out her body. I think she is about to go back to sleep when she moves again.
"Mmm," she mumbles moving her face into the crook of my neck. My heart rate picks up when I feel her skin against mine. It doesn't help that I can feel her hot breath hitting my neck either. "Did I fall asleep?" she asks and her voice sounds so scratchy. It's adorable…and a little sexy.
"Yeah," I say softly.
"I'm sorry," she sounds disappointed. "I have a hard time staying awake during movies." She still doesn't move though and I'm glad because I like this closeness. It's refreshing.
"It's alright," I say and one of my hands come up to rub her back. She lets out a content sigh, so I keep doing it. "We don't have to watch the others if you don't want. We can do something else?"
"No, no. I want to," she says as I keep rubbing her back. "I'll try my hardest to stay awake. I promise." Brittany wraps one of her arms around my waste from the back and now I really don't want to get up and put the movie in because this just feels so good. I don't want to stop cuddling with her.
"Okay," I let out slight laugh and her head bobs slightly with the movement of my chest. "But I need to get up to put the other movie in."
"Right, sorry," she says and rises to a seated position.
I get up to put the movie in and then slink back to my spot on the bed.
To my surprise, Brittany returns to the spot she was in before, placing her head back on my shoulder. She wraps her arm around my waist again, but this time she rest the hand of her other arm on my stomach. My heart rate picks up again and my whole body heats up. I try really, really hard to focus on the movie, but it's hard when she is this close. It's like she is short-circuiting my senses and making them come alive all at the same time.
To distract myself I bring my hand up to rub her back again, just so I have something to do. As soon as I do she snuggles closer to me. Okay, so maybe that wasn't the best idea to distract my mind from her because now she is closer. Her body is so warm against mine. It's too difficult to ignore, so I just let myself look over her body again and appreciate the way her skin looks so soft and the way that her ribs rise and fall with each breath.
"Keira Knightly is hot," Brittany's voice snaps me out of my thoughts.
"Uh-y-yeah," I say because she is. I want to add 'you're hotter' but I don't because of obvious reasons. Anyone could see that.
Neither one of us say anything else for a while.
About twenty minutes into the movie Brittany speaks again. "You know, you are making it really hard to stay awake rubbing my back and all," she says and I take in a sharp breath and I stop moving my hand. Does she not like it? Does she want me to stop?
It sure seemed like she liked it. She didn't complain. Well, until now.
"Sorry," I remove my hand completely from her back.
"Don't be sorry," she says moving her head to rest on my chest. "It feels amazing. My eyes are just getting tired again. I don't want to be rude and fall asleep on you again." she says honestly.
I let out a breath of relief. "Britt, it's okay. You can sleep if you want to," I bring my hand back up to rub her back again. She sighs in content.
Brittany doesn't say anything else the rest of the movie, so I assume she fell back asleep. When the credits start to roll for the second time today, I hear a faint snore. I chuckle a little to myself. I pick up my phone that is sitting to the side of me to check the time. It's about 5:30.
I let out a yawn and pull Brittany a little closer to me. Her head is still resting on my chest, so I carefully slide down the bed until I am lying completely flat on my back. Brittany stirs a little in my arms, but she doesn't wake up. Instead she nuzzles closer and drapes one leg over the both of mine.
I close my eyes and sleep soon takes over.
/
I wake up to a buzzing sound.
I blink a few times in confusion and I feel something warm next to me. Then I remember that it's Brittany sleeping beside me and I can't help the smile that creeps across my face. I realize the buzzing is the vibration from my phone.
Quinn is calling me.
"Hello," I say in a soft voice so as not to disturb Brittany.
"Hey Santana, Rachel and I were wondering if you wanted to come and get ice-cream with us?" Quinn asks.
"Uh-sure. Let me ask Brittany if she wants to."
"Oh, Brittany is with you? Rachel has been trying to get a hold of her all day."
"Yeah, she came over to watch a movie with me. Hold on, okay? I have to wake her up. She fell asleep." I set the phone down on the other side of the bed. "Britt," I say while lightly shaking her. She lets out a soft hum, but doesn't move. "Brittany," I try again this time bringing my hand up to comb through her hair. Her eyes slowly open and she tilts her head up to look at me. Crystal clear blue eyes meet mine and I all but melt into a puddle on my bed. She is so beautiful that it hurts. She smiles at me sleepily. "Hey," I say in a soft voice.
"Hi" she says back just as soft. I just gaze into her eyes until I remember that Quinn is on the phone waiting for an answer.
"Oh, Quinn and Rachel want to know if we want to get ice-cream with them."
Brittany's eyes brighten almost immediately. "Ice-cream?" she asks and I nod. "Who could say no to ice cream?" I let out a giggle before reaching over to pick up the phone again.
"Yeah. We'll come," I say into the phone.
"Cool. Met us at Dana's."
"Alright. See ya." and I hang up the phone.
/
Brittany and I get to the ice cream shop in about half an hour. It is a twenty minute walk from my building. It took a half hour because we laid in bed for a few minutes after I got off the phone with Quinn before we actually got up and got out the door.
When we got there Rachel and Quinn were already sitting at a table and munching on their ice creams.
"Crap!" I hear Brittany call from behind me.
"What?" I say a little worried.
"I forgot my money," she says and looks down at her feet.
She looks a little ashamed. I internally laugh at her adorableness.
"That's okay," I say and try to raise her spirits. "I got it." I smile at her.
"No-no, I can't let you do that. I already fell asleep on you twice today and I can't have you pay for my dinner. I feel so bad. God, I'm so stupid. Why do I always forget the simplest things?" she's rambling and my smile only grows wider. She is so adorable.
"Woah-woah," I giggle. "First of all, you are not stupid, so stop saying that. Second, it's totally not a big deal. It's just a few dollars. And I fell asleep too, so there." She smiles a timid smile at me before slowly nodding her head. "And third, ice cream is not dinner. You also brought pizza remember?"
"Okay," she says lowly. "But I'm gonna make this up to you. I swear I'm not always like this and I don't always fall asleep during movies like I did today. I mean, I do have trouble staying awake, but not all the time. I'm so sorry."
"Britt, seriously, it's okay."
I grab Brittany's arm and pull her towards the counter.
Brittany and I order our ice cream and take our seats next to Quinn and Rachel.
"Hey guys!" Rachel says in her nauseatingly happy voice. "Brittany, I have been trying to reach you all day."
"Yeah, sorry. I accidentally left my phone and purse at the apartment." Rachel nods her head up and down in understanding.
"So, Brittany, Rach was telling me about how you are going to school for photojournalism?" Quinn asks between bites of her cookie dough ice cream.
"Yep," Brittany nods happily.
"I thought you might be going to school for dance. You are really incredible."
"I love to dance. More than anything, but I can dance anywhere. I don't need it to be my job. Photojournalism is awesome though. I like it because everything has its own separate story. I could take a picture of you right now eating your ice cream, and in that moment that's your story, but another day, you could be just sitting around reading. Then that would be your story. Separately those pictures would be puzzle pieces into figuring out who you really are, but together they show the big picture." I could listen to her talk all day. Brittany could talk about a dog shitting on a lawn and I would listen.
"That's a really interesting take on things," Quinn replies a little intrigued. "Sure sounds like you love it."
"Well, yeah. I mean, I love getting to know people's stories." Brittany glances at me when she says this and my stomach flutters. In a good way. Not in a nervous or I'm getting sick way.
Happy.
"Sounds like the perfect fit for you then," Rachel says to Brittany.
"So, what about you guys? What are you all going to school for?" Brittany says as she is trying to lick up the ice cream that is dripping down her cone. My stomach flips at the sights and I find myself pinching my legs together underneath the table.
I scold myself because someone licking up ice cream off a cone should not be that sexy.
"Well, right now I perform at weddings." Rachel's tone is somewhat melancholy, "but someday I will be in the bright lights of a Broadway stage." At this her voice chippers up as she stares off into the distance.
Rachel loves to perform. She always has and I know for a fact that singing in those weddings is something that she really loves. Her heart is in chasing her Broadway dream though and I'd be lying if I said that I didn't want her to make it. As much as I pretend to hate her, it's impossible not to admit that the girl has talent.
"I'm sure you will make it someday," Brittany says back. "What about you Quinn, what's your story?"
"Well," Quinn says slowly. "I actually want to be a teacher. Art, in particular. I love it." Quinn is looking down at the table but I cannot only see the smile in her eyes, but also hear it in her voice.
"Yeah, Quinn is really talented. She used to draw pornographic pictures of me in the bathroom stalls at school." Rachel smiles and tells that like she is proud to be one of Quinn's first art projects. She told me that it was so she could say she knew Quinn before she got famous and helped as her inspiration. Brittany stares at them with a weird expression on her face. Her mouth is slightly hanging open and her brows are furrowed together.
"We weren't exactly friends in high school," Rachel answers the unasked question.
"Okay," Brittany says slowly before turning in her seat towards me, "and you?" she asks quirking her head to the side.
"Yeah, Santana what is your story this year?" Quinn leans back in her chair and raises her eye brows at me.
"Shut up Q." I bite.
I haven't really found my 'calling' yet. It's just really hard to pick one thing that you want to do with the rest of your life. In high school I thought I knew, but I realized that I was just doing it because I though that's what people wanted from me. I have changed my major three times now. I started with wanting to do something in the medical field, then I went to business, and now I am lost.
"I-I don't really know." Brittany must sense my hostility and gives me an apologetic look as to say sorry for asking.
It's not a sore subject for me or anything I just really don't know. I guess sometimes it's frustrating because everyone seems to know what they want to do and who they want to be. Maybe I do feel lost at times.
"You'll figure it out," Brittany says and gives me the warmest smile I have ever seen. It doesn't seem like she is just saying that to make me feel better. It's genuine and amazingly it does make me feel better.
I return her smile and mutter a "thanks."
"Okay, so you have to tell me how you all know each other because you seem too different to be friends. No offense or anything."
Me and Quinn both let out a laugh because Brittany's right. When we all first met we hated each other. I didn't even like Quinn when I first met her and she is my best friend. She just seemed to represent everything I hated. She was pretty, popular and bitchy. I kind of always kept to myself. That was until high school.
I had this idea in my head that I needed to be liked in order to be successful. I am almost certain that that is what caused me to be even more unhappy than if I didn't 'fit in' at all. Between the pressures of trying so hard to get everyone to 'like' you and always competing with Quinn for the top spot on the Cheerios, life was kind of miserable.
Once I got out of high school and into college I started to realize that for the past four years of my life, I was always trying to please other people. Now I am just trying to figure out what makes me happy. I feel like somewhere in there I just kind of disappeared.
"None taken," Quinn laughs. "We all hated each other when we first met."
"Actually," Rachel chimes in, "I didn't hate you guys. You hated me." Rachel puffs out her lower lip in reminiscence.
It's true though and even though I am mean to Rachel now, it was a lot worse in high school. Sometimes I feel bad for it… Sometimes.
"Whatever," Quinn says, "that's not the point. We all ended up joining glee club together. Well Santana and I," Quinn motions between us with her hand, "we were supposed to destroy it from the inside." When Brittany looks like she doesn't understand Quinn quickly adds. "Our cheer coach was a bit crazy. Anyway, me and Santana actually ended up enjoying glee club a lot."
"So all three of you can sing?" Brittany asks.
"Yep," I say to her. "Crazy huh?" Brittany nods her head.
"You should really hear this one sing," Quinn says and slings an arm around my shoulder to pull me into her side. "She has one of the most unique voices I have ever heard."
"Though you could benefit from some pitch and breath control lessons, I would have to agree with Quinn. Santana, you have an amazing voice." Rachel has only ever complemented me on my singing once before and that was only because Mr. Schuster made her.
Brittany turns to me with her eyebrows raised, "I guess you will have to sing for me sometime"
"Good luck with that," Quinn mutters and looks at me with a semi pained expression.
My face falls from a smile too anxious in less than a second. "It's a long story," is all I say in return to Brittany. We don't really talk about the last time I performed. Quinn and Rachel know that I don't like to talk about it.
/
Quinn and I get back to the apartment and I toss my keys in the basket by the door. I sit down at the kitchen table and let out a loud sigh. Quinn sits down across from me.
"Santana are you alrig-"
"I'm fine Q." I snap cutting her off. I take another deep breath before I speak again, "I'm sorry. I'm okay. Just memories."
Quinn nods in understanding. "Okay, but I want you to know that if you ever need to talk about it-"
"Quinn please," my voice shakes a little. "I can't." I can feel the tears forming behind my eyes.
Quinn must see the tears starting because she makes her way over to me and wraps me up in a tight hug.
"Right, I'm sorry. I just wanted you to know that I'm here to listen if you ever need it, okay?"
I sniffle a little because when someone hugs you when you are crying or about to cry, it's comforting, but it also makes you want to let go and cry harder.
"Thanks Q," I mumble into her shoulder.
"I am surprised Brittany still has her head. Usually you would tear someone to pieces if they asked you about that." I let out a stiffed laugh. I probably would have blown up if it was anyone besides Brittany.
"She doesn't know," I speak into her shoulder again then I move back so I can look at Quinn. "…and you brought it up. Brittany is a really great person. There is just something about her. I don't know what it is, but I don't think I could be mean to her if I wanted to." That's a little more information than I intended to share, but its Quinn. She's gets stuff out of me somehow.
"Yeah, I know what you mean," Quinn breathes. "Rachel and I were talking about how sweet she was." She pauses for a moment before adding, "So you like her then?"
My eyes widen for a moment before I realize that she probably means as a friend. "Yeah," I say. "She's cool."
Quinn smiles and says, "Good. Now we can officially welcome her into our circle of friends." She pats me on the head and stands up, "You busy Friday night?" Quinn asks getting out a glass and turning on the faucet to get a glass of water.
"No," I reply.
"Good cause all four of us are going to The Zone. It was Rachel's idea, but she wanted to make sure it was cool with you first."
"Oh she did, did she? Well, sure, why not." I try to contain my eagerness because the idea of a night out at a club with Brittany is more than exciting.
"Awesome," she downs the glass of water and strides into the living room to sit down on the couch. I follow her and take a seat on the other end. I let my eyes wander around the room for a moment. I really need to get more involved with the decorating. There are random splotches of paint hanging up everywhere because Quinn insists that its "art".
"Mercedes asked about you today."
Quinn draws me back into the moment, "hmm," is my reply. Then I realized it was Mercedes she was talking about. "What she say?"
Quinn smirks a little, "just asked if you were being lazy and decided not to join us today."
"I wish she didn't have to move," I say a little saddened. "She was my home girl," I sigh.
"Hello, your best friend is sitting right here."
"Yes, and you are my best friend. The most amazing friend actually, but Mercedes, she was my Lima Heights Adjacent neighbor. We sold lemonade together. You just can't force that type of bond Quinn."
"Yeah, yeah," Quinn grumbles while she stretches her legs out so they are resting on the coffee table. She closes her eyes and we both sit in silence for a while.
My eyes are starting to get really heavy. It's not even that late, but I didn't sleep well the night before and that short nap earlier did more harm than good. I let out an over-dramatic yawn, stretching my body out before hopping up off the couch.
"Goodnight Quinny the pooh," I joke while walking past Quinn she just grunts in response.
When I get into my bedroom, I quickly change into my pajamas and crawl into my nice warm bed. When my face hits the pillow, I am out almost immediately. Of course the last person to run through my mind is the same one who was in my thoughts when I first woke up this morning and I have a feeling that's not going to change anytime soon.
:) :) and one more for luck :)