"Santana, Dammit!" I hear called from the bathroom. "Why do you always leave the curling iron on? Fuck! Get me some ice," Quinn's voice rings through the apartment and she sounds pretty pissed.
I roll my eyes, but get off the couch and walk to the fridge to grab a chunk of ice to put into a plastic bag. "Shit Quinn, what did you do?" I walk into the bathroom and see that her whole left hand is red.
"I didn't do anything. You left the curling iron on," she grumbles and snatches the ice from my hand. Quinn lets out a loud hiss as she places it on her hand.
"But how the hell did you do that?"
"It was falling, so I reached down to catch it and I burnt my fucking hand and it hurts," she says through gritted teeth.
"I wasn't finished with it yet, that's why it's still on," Quinn looks up to my face and notices that only half of my hair is actually curled. I have only left the curling iron on a couple of times, but each time Quinn somehow manages to burn herself. This time definitely takes the cake though.
"I don't have time to argue, Santana. I have to get to class," she brushes past me and out of the bathroom. I shrug my shoulders. I wasn't trying to argue with her. I guess if the roles were reversed I would be pissed too.
"See you later," I call to Quinn as she is walking out the door.
I only have classes on Tuesdays and Thursdays and its Wednesday, so I don't really have anything to do today. I am ahead in both of my online classes too, so I decided yesterday that I would just lounge around all day. My Tuesdays and Thursdays are really long though. My first class is at 8 o'clock and I don't get home till after 5.
I have a couple of hours in the middle of the day for lunch that I usually spend in the library doing homework because what else am I supposed to do? That's okay though, I would rather be doing homework at school than on my days off.
I am sitting on the couch watching a show about people who get locked up in foreign countries because nothing else is on at 10 in the morning. Right now, some guys is stuck in prison because someone planted drugs in his bag and police found it when he went through airport security.
Suddenly I feel my phone vibrate on the coffee table. The sound echoes across the room. I look down at the screen to see who could be calling me. It's my father.
I let out a loud sigh because I haven't spoken to my father in a couple of months. I didn't intentionally stop talking to him, I just got really busy. Apparently he is really busy too, with my sister and everything.
I answer the call with a little hesitation in my voice. "Hello?" I breathe.
"Hey honey," my dad's voice sounds weak and worn-out coming from the other line.
"Hi dad," I say.
"I was just calling to see how you were. I haven't seen you in so long. How have you been?"
"I'm doing alright," I say into the phone. It's actually really good to hear his voice again. I have been wanting to call him for some time now. I just have never found the opportunity, or rather, made excuses when the opportunity came up. "H-how are you?" I ask hesitantly.
"Oh you know, your sister is keeping me busy. That girl thinks she needs to be a part of every after school activity." He laughs into the phone. My little sister, Maya, has been trying to busy herself with anything and everything. Ever since my mother's death we all have been. It happened nearly four years ago, but it doesn't hurt any less.
I let out a small laugh to show that I heard him.
"We miss you here Santana," he whispers into the phone.
"I know dad. I'm sorry," my voice shakes a little and I am finding it harder to control the tears that are threatening to fall from my eyes. "I'll come to visit soon," is all I say to that. I haven't seen my dad in almost a year. I feel really terrible about it, but every time I come home, I am reminded of my mother. It's just too painful. I still feel like everyone blames me for what happened. And no matter how many times people tell me that it wasn't my fault, I will always see the doubt that is veiled in their eyes.
For the weeks after it happened leading up to when I left for college, my father didn't look at me the same. We were pretty close before, we all were, but after that day, he just stopped. He stopped talking. He wouldn't look me in the eye. He couldn't, I suppose.
What made it even worse was the fact that he didn't treat my sister any differently. I know he didn't mean to, but it still hurt.
"Dad?" I breathe, "I love you. I really am sorry."
I hear a sniffle on the other end and I feel the warm trail of a tear fall down my cheek, "I know sweetheart. I love you too," and then he hangs the phone up. My dad has never been one to show emotions, so him hanging up abruptly doesn't really surprise me. We are alike in that manner.
I let the phone drop down into my lap and then cradle my head in my hands. The tears start flowing now. I haven't let myself cry over this in such a long time. Sometimes my mind wonders to thoughts about my mother. She was such a wonderful person, not at all like me. Those days are hard because I think I'll just wake up and she will still be here. I can pick up the phone and her voice will be on the other line. As much as I wish for it to happen, it never does. That's the hardest part, just knowing I will never be able to see her again.
I thought I was moving on, not forgetting, just moving on, but one phone call can change everything. I just miss my mom so much. I miss my father too and my sister. I miss everyone, but the longer you stay away, the harder it gets to go back.
It's hard on my dad, I know it is. They were so in love. It was the kind of love you read about. I can only hope I never have to have my soul mate taken from me or anyone, no one should know that kind of pain.
I hear a knock on the door. It startles me a little because who could it be? Quinn and Rachel have class today and no one else would just drop by. I hesitantly get up and makes my way to the door. I stop by the mirror to make sure that my eyes look alright. They're still a little red.
I open the door with a scowl on my face, but it immediately softens.
"Brittany? W-what are you doing here?" My voice sounds a little weak from crying.
"Hey," she smiles. "Rachel told me you didn't have class today. I don't either, Wednesdays and Fridays are my days off. I thought maybe I could keep you company," I give her a soft smile and open the door wider so she can step in. "Are you alright?" she asks.
I guess she must have noticed the red in my eyes, "Yeah," I say whipping my eyes. "Just some family stuff."
"Oh, parents on your cause about something? Mine get that way too, don't let it get to you parents are crazy."
"Uh-no, it's not that," I debate in my head whether or not I should tell her about my mom. She is going to find out sooner or later. I might as well tell her now, "But it would only be parent, my mother died about four years ago," I say and I can feel my vision blurring with the fresh tears forming. I look down to the floor to try to cover it up.
Brittany's face softens and her eyes turn sympathetic, "Santana, I'm sorry I-"
"No, don't be sorry, you didn't do anything," I cut her off, "it's just- I just got off the phone with my dad. I haven't spoken to him much since it happened." I look down at the floor again to try and hide my tears.
"Do you want me to leave?" she looks a little embarrassed. Like she doesn't know what to say or do. She starts to walk back toward the door when I don't say anything, but I quickly grab her wrist.
"Please stay," I whisper as if I can't believe it myself that I am asking her to. I would normally want to just be alone. I hate it when people see me cry. "We can watch the third movie if you want?"
Brittany nods her head.
We go into my bedroom and as soon as we get in there I am wrapped up in a hug. I am a little taken off guard, but I eventually feel myself leaning into her embrace. I actually hate hugs, I hate when people get too close to me, especially people I don't know that well. Quinn gets away with it because she is my best friend. Rachel sneak attacks me and then backs off quick enough, so I don't have time to smack her down, but when Brittany's arms wrap around my back and gently squeeze, my body immediately relaxes. It feels so good that I can't help but sigh into her neck.
Brittany pulls back and smiles at me, "you looked like you needed a hug," she says simply.
I give her a weak smile in return.
Brittany goes to sit on the bed and I put the movie in. When I turn around she is sitting in the middle of the bed. Her mouth stretches into a grin and she says, "it's your turn to be cuddled today," and she pats on her stomach to show me where to lay down.
I crawl onto the bed and lay my head down on her belly. It's hard, yet soft and so warm. Brittany immediately brings her hand up and starts combing through my hair and massaging my scalp. I feel my eyes flutter shut at the sensation.
/
"Santana?" Brittany whispers softly about halfway through the movie.
"Mhm?" Brittany is still playing with my hair and my eyes are getting heavy.
"I gotta pee," she whispers again.
I giggle then sit up. I look at her face that is scrunched up in pain, probably because she has been holding in her pee for too long. She is so adorable. "You are so adorable," I say and my cheeks flush because I only meant to think it.
"Well, I'm not going to be adorable when I pee all over your bed." Brittany gets up and sprints to the bathroom and I just shake my head and laugh.
She comes back moments later with a peculiar look on her face. Brittany's hands are hidden behind her back as she stands in the doorway with a little smirk.
"What?" I say growing a little nervous under her gaze.
Her smirk only grows. "You know what I hate?" Brittany asks creeping toward the bed.
"What?" I ask.
"I hate when you wash your hands after you go to the bathroom and then your fingers get really cold because the water is freezing and you can't figure out which way to turn the handle to make it not cold." she spits it out so fast that I can barely tell what she said.
"Alright, but why are you looking at me like that-"
Brittany jumps onto the mattress and immediately starts tickling my stomach under my shirt. My body is shocked at how cold her hands are and I am momentarily stunned. "Shit!" I cry, "that's fucking cold." I am squirming around and trying to throw her off me, but she somehow managed to pin me down to the mattress.
I can't help the bubble of laughter that escapes my throat, mostly because she is freaking tickling me, but also because who does that!?
After about a minute of struggle I plead for my life, "Br-Brit-Brittany please, I can't- breathe!" Finally Brittany rolls off of me curling over in laughter herself.
"What the hell?" I say to her, but I'm not mad. In fact I am still smiling like an idiot.
She turns to face me, "there's that smile," she says poking my cheeks. We're both breathing heavily. Brittany's thumb brushes across the skin of my cheek ."You should never not smile," she adds moments later when our breathing has evened out.
I shake my head at her, but my smile doesn't fade. I clear my throat to ease some of the awkward tension that has seemingly seeped into the room. Not that its uncomfortable, it's just that I don't really know what I am supposed to do. I settle for patting Brittany's shoulder and saying, "come on, let's finish this movie. Weirdo."
Brittany sticks out her tongue at me before she lays down again on her back. She lifts up her arm and this time I lay my head down over her chest. Her heart beat is calming and Brittany starts to draw lazy circles at the base of my shoulder with her fingers.
I snuggle a little closer and that's how we spend the rest of the movie. My head resting on her chest and her fingers caressing my arm. I'm so glad Brittany decided to come over because I would probably still be laying on the couch throwing myself a pity party.
/
"These movies are so long," Brittany says while stretching out her body.
I nod my head in agreement "At least you stayed awake the whole movie this time."
"That's because I took an energy shot before my session with Sugar this morning, which wasn't such a good idea because I couldn't stop bouncing around. So, I'll never do that again."
I let out a laugh, "You worked this morning?"
"Mhm," I feel the vibration of Brittany's answer through her stomach. "Sugar likes to work out super early, like at five in the morning, she pays me extra on those days, so it's totally cool with me. "
Brittany brings a hand up to comb through my hair, "there isn't enough money in the world to make me get up that early and exercise." I hear Brittan's stomach grumble from underneath me. "You want some lunch?" I sit up and cross my legs while I turn to face her.
"Yes, please," she says enthusiastically. "I haven't eaten anything all day," she grabs her stomach.
"Why not?" I ask her.
"Well, I haven't had time to buy any food yet this week. Although now that I think about it I could be at the store right now instead of with you, but what fun would that be?" Her face turns up into a sly smile and I can't help but return it. It's seems that every time she smiles at me, I am forced to smile along with her. "I'll just go Friday morning."
"I'm sure Rachel would let you eat some of her stuff."
"She told me I could, but it's all weird food. Way too complicated for me to make. I'm not a very good cook."
"Well, what are you in the mood for? Quinn and I aren't as complicated with our food as Rachel is, so I'm sure we have something you would like."
Brittany raises a finger to tap at her chin while she is thinking, "um..." she draws out, "Oh, do you have macaroni? Mac and Cheese is my kryptonite."
I let out a giggle. "Always," I say.
/
"Can you get the milk and butter out of the fridge?" I ask while I am stirring the noodles.
Brittany gets up and walks over to the refrigerator. She sets the items down on the counter by the sink and then comes to stand next to me, with her butt leaning against the counter. "So, why did you guys hate each other in high school?" Brittany asks looking up at the ceiling.
I shrug my shoulder because really there wasn't a reason. Just stupid high school crap, "I don't really know. Quinn and I were always competing against each other for the top spot on the Cheerios. Rachel was just Rachel and I was a conceded high school girl. Rachel had the talent and the drive I always wanted, she really is a star."
"Well, from what she tells me, you are too," Brittany looks over at me and I look into her eyes and see nothing but sincerity. I want to scream and yell that I'm not, but I just get lost in her honesty.
I clear my throat before I speak again, "even if I was, that was then. I don't sing anymore, at least not in front of people because, of course I sing. Everyone does."
"Does that mean I get to hear you sing?" she asks and her eyes light up and she nudges me with her hip.
"Maybe someday," I say and give her a playful wink.
She smirks, "fair enough."
"What about you? What was your high school life like?"
Brittany sighs, "Boring," she states.
"I find that hard to believe, you must have been popular, right?"
"Actually I was really, really shy in school. I always kept to myself. People thought something was wrong with me. They thought I was too dumb to function or something." Brittany looks to the ground and I can tell she doesn't really like to talk about that part of her life.
"I think you're awesome," I bump her with my hip, "but you don't seem shy now."
"That's because after high school I just said 'screw it, I'm gonna be who I am' but being shy had its benefits. I got to notice things about people that most others don't. Like watching and listening instead of engaging helps you learn about people. I mean, talking to people lets you get to know people too, but watching them and noticing the things they don't necessarily want you to, that's what I love. It's part of the reason I am interested in photojournalism."
"So, you know about people? What do you think about me?" I tilt my head to the side, wanting to see what she will come up with.
"I know that you are somewhat of a quiet person. Not shy like I was, but reserved. Almost like you are protecting yourself. Um," she taps her chin with her finger again with that adorable face of hers, "um, you like to pretend you don't care about Rachel, but I know you do." She pokes her finger in my cheek. "And you are really strong. If I hadn't come over when I did, I would never realize something was bothering you," she says more seriously.
"Hmm," I say in shock. That was scary accurate. I would have thought she would get the impression that I hate Rachel, everyone else does, but then again, Brittany isn't everyone else.
"I may not know a lot of things, but I know people, " she says simply with a shrug of shoulders.
Just then the oven beeps signaling that the noodles are ready. I take the pot over to the sink and pour them into the strainer. I give it a few shakes and pour the noodles back into the bowl.
Brittany grabs the carton of milk and holds it over the pan, "how creamy do you want it?" she asks.
"Wanky," I smile.
"What does that even mean?" she laughs.
"Wanky?"
"Yeah, you said it before too."
"I can't just tell you confidential information like that," I say and drop the spoon into the bowl, setting my hands on my hips.
Brittany looks at me with raised eyebrows, "and here I thought we had a special bond," she says with a shake of her head. "if I guess will you tell me?"
"Of course," I smile.
Brittany crosses her arms in front of her chest and stares up to the ceeling for a few moments, "Okay, how creamy do you want it?" I laugh at her serious face, she looks really deep in thought. "is it like, 'that's what she said?'" she finally says after about three minutes.
"Damn, you know the secret now." Brittany does a little victory dance in the middle of the kitchen. She collects herself, by smoothing over her t-shirt and walks back over to the counter. Brittany grabs the carton of milk and pours it in and waits for me to tell her when to stop. I add the butter and mix it all together.
"Rachel says you guys are from Lima, Ohio?" Brittany asks over a spoonful of macaroni.
"Yeah, that little ass town. I hated that place." I say back.
"I know what you mean, I'm from Lima too," she smiles at me.
I drop the noodles that were on my spoon back into the bowl. "You're kidding," I say.
"Nope. Born and raised." She winks at me.
"Don't tell me you went to McKinley too because that- that's just weird."
"No, I was actually home schooled," she says, "why would that be weird though?"
"It's- I mean, meeting you here. Getting this feeling like I have known you for years rather than days. Maybe we have seen each other before, like at the supermarket or something." Brittany just smiles at me. "So, you were home schooled your whole life?"
"Well, not exactly. I asked to be home schooled during high school because the teasing got so bad. People just don't understand quiet people. They automatically think something is wrong with them."
"I'm sorry," I reply. "I feel like we would have been best friends if we knew each other then."
"But you hated everyone," she says and shakes her head.
"I could never hate you though." I raise my eyes from the table and find Brittany's staring back, "I know we would have been friends." We hold eye contact for a few moments, and I can see the corners of her mouth turning up into a smile. It's so beautiful, she's so beautiful. How could anyone ever pick on her? She is perfect. I just don't understand.
As I echo the words in my mind, I realize the truth behind them.
/
"I just don't get this shit!" I say and throw my pencil down in my notebook.
"What don't you get about it Santana, it's just memorization," Brian says.
"No, it's stupid. All the little things that make up big things, and cells that have sex with themselves and my brain fucking hurts." We have been trying, or I have been trying, to learn the anatomy of a cell for about two hours now, "so many little pointless things to know!"
"We could take a break if you want?" he smirks at me. I hate that smirk because I know what it means, but I can't exactly play innocent here. I let him get a little handsy at a party a couple of months ago and one or two times before that. All those times I had been drinking and we were dancing. The next thing I know is that he has his tongue down my throat.
"Our test is tomorrow," I reply. "I need to know this crap," I say trying to ignore his silent pleads for making out again.
"Santana, come on," Brian scoots closer to me and my heart rate picks up, but not in the good way. Not the way Brittany makes my heart race just by saying something funny or by touching my shoulder. He makes my heart race in the 'oh crap' way. Or the kind of way it beats when you know something you don't like is about to happen. "You just need to relax a little." Brian reaches up to brush a strand of hair behind my ear. I am too caught off guard to say or do anything. I sense his face inching closer to mine. I can feel his hot breath mixing with my own.
Right then my phone goes off. Thank God!
Brian isn't a bad guy and I really do like him, just not like that. He's not exactly my type. Come to think of it, I don't really know if I have a 'type'. My mind say 'yeah you do. Blond hair, blue eyes and the sexiest and most adorable human you have ever seen,' but I quickly brush that thought away when I look down and see that Quinn is calling me. Brain sits back, a look of disappointment stretched across his face.
"Quinn," I breathe into the phone.
"Santana, thank God!" she says into the phone she sounds irritated.
"Quinn, what are you doing? Are you okay?" I say and stand up, wanting more than anything to get away from Brian right now.
"What? No, I'm fine. I need you to come with me to Rachel's. She needs our help with something and I am not doing this alone."
"What you're in the hospital? Oh no, Quinn don't die, I'll be right there. Stay strong." I say ignoring Quinn's confusion on the other line and then hang up the phone. "Quinn needs me. I gotta go." I quickly grab my things and rush out the door.
/
"Really Rachel?" I ask as I am sitting on the couch staring at the sight in front of me. "I mean really? You wanted us to come over here for this?" I ask and motion my hands at her looking her up and down.
"Santana, please. This is really important." She insists, smoothing her hands down the front of her outfit.
"How is you dressed up looking like Raggedy Ann important? Rachel, you look like something out of a homeless ad." I hear Quinn and Brittany let out a chuckle from next to me.
"Really?!" Rachel says with the biggest smile. Which shouldn't be there because I am pretty sure I just insulted her. "Yes! That's exactly what I wanted to hear."
"You are going to an audition looking like that?" Brittany asks confused.
"Yeah," Quinn says in agreement, "Rachel what is this?"
"I will have you guys know, that I have an audition for a play. It's set in the 1930s. It's about the great depression!" Rachel exclaims excitedly clasping her hands together in front of her body.
"Well, congratulations, you look the part," I feign excitement for her, "but can we go now I have a lot of studying to do?" I say remembering about the test tomorrow, but also remembering that I don't know anything about the information. Stupid mitosis and meiosis crap.
"Oo, what class?" Brittany asks from beside me.
"Biology," I groan. "I hate biology."
"I could help you. I-I mean if you want? I am in Biology right now too. I actually tried to avoid taking it for as long as I could, but it's required, so-"
"Yeah, I actually have my flash cards here." I turn to Quinn, "are you staying?"
"No, I have some stuff I have to finish too," Quinn stands up and grabs her purse off the chair and turns to face Rachel, "Rachel this was...fun. I'll see you guys later."
/
"I can believe Rachel interrupted my study date with Brain for that?" I say in bafflement. I know Rachel is dramatic, so this really shouldn't be a surprise to me and I should actually be thanking her for saving me from an extremely awkward moment.
"Date?" Brittany raises her eyebrows at me.
"No- it's not like that. Brian is just a friend." I see something flash across Brittany's face.
Relief?
Maybe.
"So, do you have a boyfriend?" she asks carefully almost like she is afraid of what the answer will be.
"No," I say, "You?" and suddenly it's my turn to be anxious of an answer. Do I want her to say no? Yes, yes I do dammit.
"Well," she starts and swallows. It seems to echo throughout the room, "there was someone." Was. Was is good. Right? "His name was Quackers but apparently, I can't date a duck, so-" she says this and my eyes bug out of my head.
"What?" I laugh.
"I'm kidding," she smiles at me. "I don't have a boyfriend. Never have," she shrugs her shoulder like it's that simple and I suppose that she's right. Why date someone if you don't like them? "So, you don't like this Brian guy?"
"Well, I like him. He is my friend. I just don't like him." Brittany nods her head up and down in understanding and a smile begins to form on her lips, "What?" I say. She just shakes her head as if to say nothing. "Come on," I beg.
Brittany looks down to her lap where she is fiddling with her fingers.
"You-" she takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly, shaking her head in the process, "You're just so beautiful. I thought you would have a boyfriend.. or something," her cheeks are growing a deep shade of red. I feel mine growing red too.
"You're not so bad yourself." I wink and her cheeks get even darker. "No, but seriously, I don't think I have ever seen anyone as beautiful as you." I say it before I can stop myself, but it just come out. It's so easy. Probably because it's so true. Brittany's eyes snap up to mine. They are so clear. Deep, deep blue. Like I could jump into them if I wanted and get lost.
I don't know what it is about her, but I don't think I ever want to know what it is without her ever again.
Something passes over us, that I can't quite name.
"I'm supposed to be helping you study," Brittany finally says. "You're gonna fail because of me," she laughs.
"Right," I say and the moments gone.
/
About an hour later and Brittany and I have been through the flash cards about five times. Which is a lot, considering that there are about one hundred cards.
"Fuck," I drop my head into my hands, "I am never going to get this."
"Hey, come on, look at the piles, the ones you know are growing," she tries to cheer me up.
"I hate this stuff," I whine and drop my head to her shoulder. We have been sitting side by side on her bed with our legs stretched out in front of us, "don't make me study anymore," I beg and puff out my lower lip. "Please."
"I'm not making you do anything," she giggles. "You're the one who said you needed to study," she starts poking my sides.
"Hey!" I laugh trying to twist away. She stops immediately this time, instead of when she almost killed me the other day. We sit in silence for a few moments with my head resting on her shoulder. "What time is it?" I yawn.
Brittany picks up her phone which was laying somewhere on the bed, "it's 10:30," and this time she yawns.
"Crap, I should probably get back."
I start to gather my things together when I feel a hand rest on my back, "or you can stay here, if you want?" She almost whispers.
In a bed?
All night?
With Brittany?
Should be no problem. Just the most gorgeous girl sleeping within touching distance from me. I got this. No big deal.
"Um, o-okay," I stutter out.
/
I return from the bathroom after changing into the pair of sweat pants and t-shirt Brittany let me borrow. Both of which are too big on me. Her legs are a lot longer than mine so the ends of the sweat pants are hanging over my feet. When I got into the bathroom I couldn't help but bring the shirt she gave me up to my nose to smell. It smelled just like her and I found myself relaxing into the scent. Her scent.
Brittany is already lying in bed. I hesitate by the bedroom door because I don't really know where to go. Do I just crawl into bed with her?
"It's okay Santana," she smirks. "I won't bite. Promise." she pats down on the space next to her in the bed.
"I know that," I laugh. I walk over to the bed and crawl into it.
We are laying face to face, on our separate sides of the bed. Brittany has one arm tucked underneath her pillow, I do the same thing and cradle my head with my arm.
"Hey, I uh- I never thanked you for the other day." I tell her. "I was kind of a mess before you came over, but you made me feel better."
Brittany's eyes scan my face, "well," she starts, "you did the same for me when I needed you, so it was only fair."
As soon as I get settled into the bed, Brittany reaches over me. My body freezes and her chest is hanging right over my face. The room suddenly goes dark and I quickly realize that she was turning off the light.
What is wrong with me? I am going crazy.
"You okay?" I hear whispered from beside me.
My arms are tucked closely to my chest. I didn't even realize that I hadn't moved yet. She didn't even do anything, but having her body that close, her chest, that close to me, definitely did something to me.
"Y-yeah," I say, "just a little cold."
That works right? People freeze when they're cold, right?
"Turn on your side," she says, "with your back to me." I reposition myself onto my side and when I do, I feel her arms wrap around my body. I let out a shaky breath, but feel myself nuzzle back into her embrace. "Better?" she asks and I can feel her hot breath tickle my neck.
Her body is so warm and soft, "mhm" I mumble. It has been so long since anyone has been this close to me, but from what I remember, it never felt as good as it does right now.
I can smell Brittany's shampoo on the pillow under my head. I can feel the warmth that radiates from her body and the breath that escapes her lips hitting my neck in even patterns. I can also feel her heart beating against my back. Steady and strong. I feel so safe right here, with her.
A girl could get used to this.
"Goodnight Santana," I hear from behind me.
"g'night," I mumble and my body relaxes into sleep.
/
I wake up and the first thing I notice is a hand draped across my face. "What the?" I move the hand and find it connects to a long, pale arm, and a disheveled blond who is sprawled across the mattress with her face shoved into a pillow and her mouth hanging open. I can hear the deep breaths she is taking. Blond hair is everywhere. I sit up to look at the clock on the bedside table and I see that it's 6:30. I have class at eight.
"Britt," I say gently shaking her shoulder before sitting up in the bed.
She mumbles something that I can't understand, before rolling toward me and grabbing a fistful of the shirt I'm wearing and burrowing her face in my stomach.
"You smell so good," her voice is muffled because her face is still buried.
"Britt, I have to get back to my place and get ready for class." I run my fingers through her hair and she sighs in contentment.
"Give me a few minutes," she mumbles. So I do. I keep running my fingers through her hair for about five more minutes and just when I think she went back to sleep she speaks, "you can eat here," and pops up out of the bed like she wasn't a zombie just moments before. "Come on," she says hopping out of bed, "I'll share my fruit loops with you."
"Really, you would share your Fruit Loops with me?" I bring my hand up to my heart.
"Only with you," she retorts. We both smile.
/
"So, how did it go?" Quinn asks as I enter the apartment.
"I hate my life," I say and slump down onto the couch.
"Not good, huh?" she laughs. I give her a glare and she shoots her hands up defensively. "Sorry," Quinn says, "Did you stay the night at Brittany's?"
"Yeah, it was late when we finished studying, so she asked if I just wanted to stay over."
Quinn nods her head in understanding and smirks a little. After a few moments she speaks again. "So how did it go with Brian yesterday?" she says, wiggling her eyebrows at me.
"How did what go?" I ask a little annoyed. I was trying to forget the almost kiss that happened between us last night. I woke up in such a good mood next to Brittany, that I almost completely forgot about that.
"Did you guys do anything?" she asks.
"Yeah, we studied," I snap at her.
"Whoa, okay. Geeze I was only joking with you." She raises her hands defensively.
I take a breath to calm myself down. I'm not mad at Quinn. I just want to tell her, or somebody, the real reason I don't like Brian like that, or any guy for that matter. "I know Q, it's just been a rough few days. With the test and Brian and my dad. I just-"
"Wait, what about your dad?" Oh right, I haven't told Quinn about the phone call yet.
"He uh- he called me the other day." I say nervously.
"and..."
"I told him I would visit."
"So you lied to him, again?" she asks, but it's not really a question.
"I want to go back. You know I do. It's just hard." We have had this talk a lot. Quinn always wants to drag me back to Lima with her, but I always come up with some excuse not to.
"Santana, you need to see them."
"No, I know, I just- the way he looks at me. It- it's too much."
"He misses you, and you do look a lot like her. It's hard for him too." Quinn's voice is really soft, she knows how hard this is for me. I nod my head.
"Yeah," I breathe. "I really do want to go back though. I miss my sister and I have been telling her that I would go to one of her games, you know, for whatever sport she is playing at the moment."
"That's good," Quinn gets up from where she was sitting and walks over to me. She puts both hands on my shoulders and looks me square in the eyes, "Just remember. They are your family, you should be lucky that they still want you in their lives."
My heart twists a little at that because Quinn's parents never accepted her back into the family after she got pregnant in high school. She kind of lost everything: her parents and her daughter. I really look up to Quinn. She got her life together and she doesn't let anything bring her down.
I pull her into a hug, "thanks Q."
Quinn nods at me before going to the kitchen to grab something to eat.
"Hey," I call out, "did you know that Brittany is from Lima too?"
"Yep," she smiles.
"Don't you think that's a little bizarre." I ask.
"Nope," she continues smiling.
"I feel like I know her from somewhere. Like maybe we've met before?" I stop talking and look back at Quinn. "Why are you smiling like that?" I give her a weird look. She looks like she is up to something. Its scaring me. She doesn't answer me, she just continues to pick at her snack bar. I narrow my eyes at her, but ultimately brush it off. I really wish I could read Quinn better.
Thanks for reading :)