"Can you bake?" Castiel is sitting next to me on the bed, our knees just barely touching. It's the 23rd and I feel sicker and sicker the closer to Christmas it gets.

I shrug my shoulders, "Mom taught me something's, but I'm only confident in pies. I love me some pie." I never did get to taste that pie that mom had waiting for me.

"If I ran into town today to get some stuff would you make some?" I look outside and the snow has stopped and it seems to be bright out.

"I'll write down what I need." Cas get's up and pulls on his shoes, I watch his back curve in the soft light, "How long will you be gone." He freezes and turns back towards me.

I see that there's the wild look in his eyes again, "Why?" I tug on his arm and he comes toppling over and landing beside me, his head next to my hip.

I look down at him and absently mindedly run my fingers through his hair, "Just curious." The look in his eyes slowly goes away but I can still see he's tense. "It takes a while to make is all." I bend down and kiss him, he still tastes like breakfast and I laugh.

After he's gone I go into the living area and work on the old TV. It wasn't that old, and it should be working, but something must be off in it. I really want Cas to watch some of the movies I made him get (I can't say buy because I'm not really sure about that) some of them are classics that I'm shocked he's never even heard of. The Mummy, Indiana Jones, Star Wars, and The Lord of the Rings.

I hear the impala coming back quicker than I expected and I rush over to finish putting the TV back together. I just put the last piece in place when he opens the door empty handed, "I think I got the TV working, we could start in on an unhealthy marathon of amazing action movies." Cas doesn't say anything. "Was the store closed?"

He closes the door behind him and the air seems rich with tension, "No."

"Then why didn't-" I let the question hang in the air and I went over to him, "Cas?"

He looks down at my hand on his arm, like he doesn't know what it is, there's a strange look in his eyes, something similar to how he was in those first few days. "You're in the news. I guess that message you left your parents finally made it to them." He spins around to face me and I instantly back away from him, he follows while talking. His voice growing angrier and angrier, "Cops were at that hotel we stayed in a while back, the one where I promised you I would let you go. I told you that I would never hurt you and I would let you go back to that family of yours! BUT YOU HAD TO CALL THEM AND SET THE COPS AFTER ME! AFTER US!"

I was almost up against the wall, "Cas that was before-"

"Shut up!" he yelled and shoved me the rest of the way back, I almost fell over it hadn't had been for his hand around my neck, squeezing. "I trusted you." His voice sounds bitterer and darker than I had ever heard. His free hand is pulled back, like he's going to slap me. I watch him curl his hand into a fist, the pressure around my neck begins to be too much and my eyelids begin to drop.

"Please Cas, stop. This isn't you." He hits me then, there's nowhere for me to go so I just stay there, stuck to the wall. There are black dots dancing at the edge of my vision. He holds onto me and pulls me to towards him and slams me back against the wall, I feel it shake behind me, "Cas man, please."

He brings his face right next to mine; I could see the flecks of darker blue in his eyes, "Stop begging." But he lets go of my throat and grabs my hair, forcing my head back. In that moment, with my neck open and his free hand gone from my sight I'm more scared than I have ever been. "You lied to me." There the cool feeling of metal running over skin and I close my eyes.

I feel something sticky on the back of my neck. I move my hands up and try to push him away. "Cas-" he doesn't let go of my hair, but he pulls me away from the wall and grabs one of my arms pushing against him.

I feel him slice into my arm, it feels like he's carving into me, pain roars over me. I force back the scream that's building in my throat. But it begins to be too much, he's cutting me too deep, deeper than just a warning, I scream without thinking and he blinks. As if he's coming out of some sort of daze. There's confusion in his eyes and pain. All too suddenly he lets go of me and I can't support myself. I sink to the ground. I hurt all over, but I'm alive, I don't think Cas would ever hurt me too much. I don't think he meant to hurt me this much. It's not his fault.

Cas walks out of the cabin without a word and I start to see the dancing spots again. This time I let them drag me down to the floor and I don't know what happens after that.