Mom comes and knocks on my door a few minutes later, I can't get over how pale and weak she looks. I feel so much guiltier every time I look at her. "Come on Dean." I throw my jacket aside, the one that Cas gave me, I'm worried that in the chaos it may get lost.

Mom sees the semi-bloody cloth wrapped around my arm and I hide it from her line of sight, "Come on mom." I grab her hand like I use to when I was little and woke up because I had a nightmare. I feel her relax beside me, I'm fine I want to tell her, I want to tell her I'm fine over and over again.

There's the sheriff in the living room and a strange man standing next to him, "I'm detective Hendrickson, Dean, I'm the one who's been trying to track down Castiel for the past two years. I was wondering if I could speak to you about him." He looks at my parents and frowns a little bit, but I see it, "Later of course, after you get checked out at the hospital and we make sure you're fine. I'll see you after Christmas."

There it is again, I'M FINE, I want to scream. But I just follow a lady outside, I'm still holding onto my mother's hand, and they take us to Lawrence's only hospital. Dad and Sam are going to be following in his truck. The ride is silent, and because I don't need any immediate attention my mother and I are alone in the back.

But it's a good silent, after a while I lean my head down on her shoulder and she starts to speak to me. "You know Dean, when I was younger, maybe a little bit younger than you are now I was dating your father. And my father didn't like him. Sure John was a nice respectable man, even after the war, but even still, dad was adamant." I knew this story, and I had no idea why she was telling me this, but I let her feel the silence with her memories. "Anyways I use to sneak out and your father would pick me up. One night I was out with John, and that night my father and mother were both killed, in our house. It scared me so much that at the time I could barely be around your father. I was mad at myself because I had been out with him and not home, I wasn't home and I couldn't stop the man that killed my parents." I had never heard her tell the story this way before. I was getting the point she was making nonetheless. "But in time I, when I wasn't so upset and confused life became normal again, I may not have gotten over my parents deaths but I filtered out the bad and accepted the good. That's what you have to do with honey, you have to filter out the bad and think about all the good in your life."

I nod and she stops talking, but truth be told there was only small amounts of bad. I don't know what may be wrong with me, but I had kind of, sort of…maybe fallen for Cas.

At the hospital I'm forced to wear one of those stupid see through gowns and I have to let a bunch of different people touch me. Then comes the worst part, "Do we need to test for any STD's?" the doctor in front of me isn't looking at me, he hasn't really looked at me for long anyways, but I hide my blush anyways. I'm so glad he made my mom and dad leave earlier.

"God no." Cas had told me he was safe. It's not like he got out much to be with another person.

But the doctor misunderstands my answer and apologizes, "We just have to check everything, can you tell us everywhere he physically hurt you."

It's a good thing he didn't say emotionally because I might have slipped and said my heart, like that isn't the cheesiest thing ever said. "He cut my arm, bruised my neck, cheek, back of my head.." I leave out the bruises on my hips from our first time, they're almost gone anyways, "That's about it."

"About the cut…" he undoes the bandages the nurse put around my arm not ten minutes earlier, "He carved his name into you."

If I wasn't hooked up to all these machines I would have bet that my heart stopped. Instead the lines begin to become frantic. I look down at my arm, the first time I did it was still covered in blood. I knew that he had carved something into me, I felt the knife twist and turn. But why had he done this? Maybe because I had gone against him…I don't know. The doctor nods and checks off stuff on his clipboard and I have no idea what he's thinking, "Alright, when and how did he bruise your head? Just in case you have a concussion."

I scowl and glare at the man but it doesn't matter, I know that I'm fine. All of this is useless. "A few days ago," I lie, "he slammed my head against the wall." Truth.

"Can you breath normally?" he gestures to my neck and I want to punch him until he can't remember his own name.

"Just peachy."

He tells me I can get dressed and leaves. I want to know if the cut will leave a scar but he doesn't turn around and I flip him off behind his back. I take the monitor off my good arm and carefully wrap up my bad one, I don't know how I would have to explain that. When my family comes in later mom comes over to me and sits beside me where I'm perched on the bed. Sam sits on the other side, and dad sits down on the chair next to the bed. He even smiles at me. That's when Bobby comes in. I don't even think, I just stand up and the next thing I know is that I'm hugging him just as tightly as when mom hugged me earlier, "Looks like you had one hell of a time son." I can practically feel dad bristling.

I step back from him and he's not dressed nice, but nicer than how I usually see him, "Ah well I needed a vacation from the smell of old man and alcohol."

He hits me on the arm. Hard.

"It's good to see you Bobby."

"Ah well, everybody's day is better with me in the picture."

"It is, Bobby," mom chimes in, "I wish you would stop by more often." She points a glare at dad and smiles at everyone else. She's always hated the stupid fights those two get into when they're near each other. Even Sam likes him, and dad gets so pissed when someone mentions it.

"I hope you don't mind it boy, but pretty much the whole town knows about your business now and they know you're back." He laughs, "You're the towns new Paris Hilton." that's the thing I love about Bobby; he can take any situation and make it lighter because he doesn't give two shits about whose feeling are hurt and all that. He just wants things done the right way and he'll run all over you in the best way possible.

I get to go home a couple hours later, and guess what the doctors found out? That I'm perfectly FINE. Mom, dad, and Sam all ride back together, but when Bobby offers me a ride I'm in his junker before mom says yes.

He drives a 60's model chevel and it's the best car he has on his lot. But I've waiting for dad to give me the impala, and now that he has a new truck it may happen.

"I'm going to ask you a question and you better tell the truth."

"I did not steal that wrench two months ago."

He glares at me and shoves the key into the ignition, "Will you shut your mouth for two seconds and listen to me."

I do.

"Was this Castiel fellow all that everyone says about him?" I start to answer and he glares at me again, "Because I'm not stupid, I know how trauma victims act. And if Castiel was like what they say about him then you should be crying in a dark room."

I didn't like where he was taking this, after all, Bobby was the sole person who knew that my door swung both ways. I didn't tell him, he just kind of figured it out and yelled at me until I told him it was true. Then he didn't care. He just wanted to know.

"He wasn't completely evil."

"Then where did you get all those decorations?" he gassed it around a corner and I held onto the door handle, I had forgotten how terrifying his driving was.

"From a Hello Kitty sticker book."

"Real funny jackass, I said the truth."

I looked behind us and dad's truck was no were in sight, "It really wasn't his fault with these." I gestured to my neck and cheek. "I antagonized him." It was a lie, but I wanted someone to talk to about all this, and might as well make Cas out to be the good guy he says he isn't. "He actually isn't that bad."

"I can tell by the rainbow on your face that his fist is the bad person and he's just unable to say no." it was no use so I dropped it.

"So is that thing with Jo's mom, Ellen still going on?"

"To what thing are you talking about because I have no idea-"

"I knew it you ol' hound dog."

"Shut up."