Chapter 5
Dean pulled out his cell and walked into the bathroom to take the call.
"We set up a meeting with the Chief and with Dani. An hour. Café du Monde."
"No. An hour. Warehouse 11 at the warehouse district." Dean vetoed and hung up.
"Doll, wake up, we have a meeting to get to." he called out and Lilly woke up and looked around confused. "With whom?" "Chief of Police and DAs office. They are cool otherwise I wouldn't bring you there. Come on we put that vest back on you and go. I want to scout the place first."
He helped her put the vest on and this time he managed not to touch her.
They walked out with their helmets on and when Lilly climbed onto the motorcycle this time it was much easier. Dean put his backpack on Lilly because he wanted to be free to move and she didn't need to carry it, just ride with it.
She held on to him tighter now and Dean felt her breasts against his back. For a moment he wanted her to let go a bit but when he felt her relax he told himself he did it for her sake that he allowed her to hold him so close.
They drove off and reached the warehouse in less than 5 minutes, the reason why Dean picked this place.
He passed warehouse 11 and drove to one of the taller buildings that surrounded warehouse 11.
After hiding the motorcycle inside he grabbed Lilly's hand and walked with her to the top where he told her to sit down hidden behind the balustrade. He crouched down as well and pulled out his binoculars and checked the surroundings.
"You are paranoid, right?" Lilly asked watching him.
"You are still alive, right?" he countered her question with a question of his own.
Lilly struck her tongue out to his back. "I told you the people we meet are cool. But that doesn't mean I trust cops. They might follow the Chief here. I am rather safe than sorry. You should be, too."
Sighing she pulled her knees up to her chest and hugged her legs. "What is your deal with the police? You hate them, right? Yet you do all this security work. So it is not about protecting people but rather something specific regarding cops."
Dean looked over his shoulder. "It is none of your business. You should only worry about staying alive."
He turned his attention back to the building beneath him and was surprised that Lilly remained quiet until it was almost time for the meet.
She robbed towards him and looked over the balustrade right next to him.
"There is Seth." She exclaimed happily and Dean feared for a moment she would call out to him.
But she remained quiet. Points for her.
Seth down on the ground level left his car, put a gun in his waist band, one he carried already in his shoulder holster and he looked around without being too obvious about it. He used every turn he had to make anyways to look for his partner.
He spotted him and a blonde head on a building about 900 feet away. He closed his jacket buttons and subtle nodded their way, making Dean aware that he saw them.
After that he walked in the building to assess it from the inside.
Roman arrived with Danielle Bishop on his tail a couple of minutes later.
The black haired woman climbed out of her car and talked animatedly to Roman.
"What is their deal?" Lilly whispered. Women were good to pick up on vibes and those two stood so close that there was definitely more to the story. They knew each other intimately.
"Oh doll, you don't want to know." Dean said. And he didn't really want to get into this shit. It was none of his business and he actually didn't care.
"What is this place Roman? Is this a joke?" Dani was angry. Their usual meeting place was a café downtown and not a dump like this.
"It was Dean's choice." Roman apologized while she looked down at her shoes which were dusty already. Her black dress pants didn't fare much better.
"Of course. Since when does this psycho run the show?"
"It is his ward we are talking about here. He is the bodyguard. He calls the shots. Simple as that. And Dani, this is business, keep your thoughts about Dean to yourself."
Dani could tell that Roman was serious about this. And she would be a professional. "Of course. I will behave, I don't know about him."
"He will be as well." Roman had used the conversation to walk around Dani to check the place as well and he had spotted Dean and Lilly as well indicating it with a little nod.
Dean chuckled on the roof and Lilly looked at him bewildered. He had his binoculars and she could barely make out the faces.
"The DA, Danielle Bishop. She is not a real fan of me. Neither is the Chief by the way." He explained and put the binoculars away for a second to look at Lilly. "But I know how to do my job. My job is to keep you alive and I will do that."
Lilly nodded. "Good. That is good enough for me." But it hurt being called a job. But why did it hurt? Up until today she hated this man because whenever he was around his two nice friends things went wrong for her or he just snarled in her general direction and stuff.
Up until now though she was safe and she felt like she really could put her life in his hands. Seems like he was just an ass in his personal life but a pro on the job. If that was the case she wanted to keep this strictly business as well if it guaranteed her safety.
Dean tensed and Lilly glanced down. A non-descript sedan rolled to the warehouse and out climbed a man in his sixties. He gave off an aura of authority. And one piece of the puzzle dropped into place. Dean had a problem with authorities because Danielle gave off the same vibe.
Dean checked the surroundings again and once the Chief was inside he grabbed Lilly's hand and walked down to the ground level with her.
Before they left the building he stopped her.
"You stay by my side, no matter what. I will try to always be a little in front of you. Make it easy for me and don't move around too much. Tell them your story. Appeal to Danielle, tell her how scared you are. She will understand. Tell the Chief what happened without putting too many emotions into it. And be quick. I want this over in less than 10 minutes. If we get separated, and that is just a big if, call Claire. She will send help. Don't trust the police, just the Chief. Okay?"
Lilly nodded and before he could walk out she stopped him by grabbing his arm. "Just a second." She pulled a hair band out of her jeans pocket and pulled her hair into a tight bun. "Better. I am ready."
Dean walked her over to the other warehouse. Not wanting to make a noise and announce their entry.
He could hear the voices inside.
"Where is he Seth? It is 5 minutes past 8 pm. I told you he is a fuck up."
"Chief!" Roman growled warningly and the older man just gave him a look.
"What can I say? My watch is broken. Maybe you want to give me your Rolex. I swear the lunatic will take really good care of it." Dean announced walking in from the other side. Lilly was right behind him, shielded from the others by his body.
"And Seth isn't my mom, neither are you. Hello Danielle. You look..." "Dusty." Lilly piped up. She couldn't stand the negativity radiating from the Chief and the ADA towards Dean.
Dean turned around to her smirking. "Dusty. That is the word I was looking for. But enough with the pleasantries. Meet Lilliana McFadden, witness to a murder last night, committed by two cops."
He stepped half a foot aside never giving them a full view of his ward. Seth moved subtly behind Lilly, giving her back cover. Roman took place at her side.
"My name is Danielle Bishop. I am with the DAs office. I saw the footage you took with your phone. It is a good case, one I am willing to build but we still need you to testify against those cops. And where they come from there are more. And they will be gunning for you. So I would understand it if you want to walk away from this."
"She will not be gunned down. Not on my watch Dani, stop scaring her. What I want to know Chief is, how these cops tell the story. There will be police issued bullets in that body. A police gun was fired. How do they explain it?"
"They said they interrupted a fight between the guy and Miss McFadden which was heated. Miss McFadden was able to grab the gun from Officer Thomas and fired blindly at the victim, threatening both officers with said gun until she was able to escape them."
Dean nodded. "Nice story. I am sure you have some stubs with you to test her for gun powder residue, right Chief?" The man curled his lips and nodded pulling out a stub and an evidence bag as well as some gloves.
"Test her." Dean said and nodded towards Lilly to put out her hands. The chief took a sample of both hands and sealed it in the bag under the eyes of Danielle Bishop.
"Good call." She addressed Dean and he didn't even react to the praise.
"Please tell us your version of events now Miss McFadden." The Chief urged and Lilly told them what happened, how she spend the night hiding and how she came to Shield Inc. looking for help.
By the time she was finished Dean was getting restless. This was taking too long.
"Okay, listen. Start you investigation Chief, Dani, prepare a case. If you need to reach Lilly you call your boys. She will not flee the country and she will be available to you. But act quickly we all know how trigger happy cops can be, right?" His blue eyes zeroed in on the Chief.
"We are out." He told his boys and left with Lilly the way they had come in, through the back door, walking behind her now.
Once the door was closed behind them he started to jog and Lilly followed him. "I have a really bad feeling and I want you off the streets asap. Let's go."
Lilly put on the helmet without question, put on the backpack and climbed behind Dean on the motorcycle.
They left the warehouse district and had to wait at a red light on their way to the motel.
Out of a side street rolled a police car. Dean eyed the cop car carefully. Their light went green and he drove by them slowly. Once he had passed them they turned on their siren.
"They figured out our ruse." He called out to Lilly. "Hold on tight, don't let go. Change your weight according to the direction we go in."
Lilly grabbed him harder and it was almost painful. But he was no stranger to pain and with the adrenaline pumping through his veins he didn't feel a thing.
The cops gave chase and followed them through the streets, when they turned to a side street and one cop started to fire at them Dean knew that these guys were crooked cops as well and they would kill them no matter what the warrant said. Dean drove zigzagged down the street and was sure they dodged all the bullets until Lilly's grab became really painful on his chest and she heaved to breathe.
"You got hit. The vest caught it. Breathe in and out in small takes. Hold on just a little longer doll." He shouted and Lilly clapped her hand on his chest, she had understood.
Dean used the next small alley and drove through it, the police car had a hard time following them here and had to slow down. He headed downtown to lose the cops in the traffic. The night fall and the traffic was to their advantage and Dean was able to lose the cop car. But he knew that others cops were looking for them now and he had to get Lilly off the street and fast.
He headed south towards Brooklyn Bridge crossing the old bridge quickly and got lost in the endless streets of Brooklyn. When they reached Crown Heights he slowed down in front of an apartment building.
A group of four young African American men strolled lazily towards them. Dean took off his helmet and the leader of the little group smiled widely showing off a row a pearly white teeth.
"Look who it is. Jon, how is it going?"
Dean just nodded at him and helped Lilly off the bike and immediately checked her back. She really had caught a bullet but her vest prevented her from anything serious. But it would hurt like a bitch. She groaned when she moved.
"Wait. Let me help you." He took off the helmet and turned to the four young men.
"I need your help Charles. I need the bike off the streets for a while. I take it my car is still in one piece?"
Charles touched his heart, looking hurt. "Jon, Bro, we take care of your stuff." He was eying Lilly now.
"She is with me. She is under my protection. Make that known."
"Oh I get you Bro. She is that white chick that killed a cop. Way to go Ma'am."
Dean let them in that believe, it was for the best for now.
"You see a cop snooping around you stall him and give me a call. You do that?"
"Anything for you Jon, you know that. And your lady is safe here, don't worry. I will spread the word. Let me handle the bike while you take care of your lady friend."
Dean pressed the keys in the other man's hand and helped Lilly up the stairs into the building and up to the 4th floor.
"It's nothing much." He mumbled and opened the door to let her in.
Inside he locked the door with various measures and guided Lilly to the beat down couch.
He took the backpack off of her and helped her out of her tshirt. She winced when he took off the vest.
A huge bruise was on her left lower shoulder. He gently probed the area and she hissed in pain.
"Sorry doll, just making sure your ribs are not broken. But it looks fine. That will hurt like a bitch for a couple of days, but the vest saved your life."
"Breathing still hurts." Lilly told him and he nodded. "It is swollen and bruised. But no real damage is done. Breathe through the pain, I will get you some ice. Sit down."
Lilly sat down on the brown leather couch that looked like it was a hundred years old. The brown leather was worn out where people had sat countless of times. It was faded there.
Adrenaline prevented her from freaking out about the almost hit and the shock hadn't settled in so far.
Dean returned with an ice pack and a new Shirt for her.
"Put it on and lean back I will put it on your shoulder then."
Lilly did that and he put the ice on her bruised body.
"They called you Jon." She said in a small voice and she watched his reaction carefully.
He looked at her for the longest time until he said. "It's an alias. Can't use my name everywhere. The cops look for Dean Ambrose. Well, here lives no Dean Ambrose so we will be safe here. Let's order some pizza, cool?"
Lilly smiled. He could talk like a sophisticated guy but now he went ghetto on her. Interesting.
"Cool. And stop that slang." He grinned. "Right, I forget sometimes that I am a white boy. Are you into pepperoni and extra cheese?"
"Yes!" Lilly's eyes beamed and Dean went to order the pizza over his home phone, they had ditched the mobiles on the bridge, and took a quick shower. Lilly seemed to hold up fine, considering they got shot at and she got hurt. He blamed himself for the injury. They should have used a car, but he wanted to be mobile and quick so he had favored the bike. And now she was hurt. Well, lesson learned.
Dean returned with his hair still wet and another pair of old jeans and a black shirt on, no socks.
"What do you want to drink? I have beer, coke and water."
"Water please." She piped up from the couch. He grabbed himself a coke and sat down on the arm chair next to the couch.
"You are holding up good Lilly. I am proud. I am also sorry you got hurt. It will not happen again, I promise. We will use a car next time. And I really thought our ruse would hold for a little longer. But that tells us where they have their guys at."
The doorbell rang and Dean got up grabbing his gun from the counter.
It was just the delivery boy and he paid him and walked back inside putting the pizza on the table.
Lilly grabbed a piece and wolfed it down then another. Watching her silently Dean ate his pieces with more grace but she was hungry and he didn't really mind. He had no manners to speak of so he really gave a damn that she wolfed down two more pieces before she stopped to lick her fingers. "Sorry. I was so hungry. Sorry. I know how to eat in public under normal circumstances." She apologized but didn't stop licking her fingers. It was strangely erotic Dean thought to himself and had to calm himself silently.
"Don't apologize doll. It's fine. I keep you starving, it's my fault. Today as just been one heck of a ride and I promise that I will take better care of you from now on. I am prepared now."
"It's fine. I am fine, thanks to you. Just a little bruise. But I would be surely dead without all of you guys. So thank you again." Well, the little bruise hurt like a bitch, but still it hadn't set in on her that she had been shot at.
"Don't worry about it. Come doll, I'll show you where you can crash."
He showed her the little bathroom. Everything inside was squeaky clean, even after his recent shower.
His bedroom was small as well. He had no bed, just a mattress on the floor, and a little drawer where his clothes were probably in. Again it was all very minimalistic but clean.
"Take the bed, bedclothes are fresh on there. Everything in here is yours, I just have one rule."
Lilly looked at him waiting for his rule.
"I have trouble sleeping. I might have…nightmares. When I do have a nightmare, don't touch me. Don't wake me up or anything. Stay away from me then because I could hurt you unintentionally. Alright?" "Got it. Where will you sleep?" "On the couch. Don't worry about me I slept under far worse conditions if at all."
It didn't feel right to keep him out of his own bed, well rather off of his own mattress but she took the offer because she was standing asleep after the dinner.
"Can I use the bathroom before I go to sleep?"
"Of course doll. Towels are under the sink. Close the toilet seat when you leave."
Lilly went into the bathroom and found a new toothbrush on the sink which she used and after she had finished in the bathroom she went to the bedroom, closed the door and fell asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow.
Sometime during the night Lilly woke up sweating. She had been dreaming about the chase, about the bullet that had hit her. And she was shaking now. She could have died today. It was a really close call. And her shoulder pounded in the rhythm of her heartbeat, reminding her that without the vest she would be dead.
Outside roared a thunderstorm and one especially loud thunder made her shriek and she got up to look out of the window, still shaking a little and her heart beating really fast. She was close to freaking out completely and losing her shit when she heard something.
Between the thunders she heard someone mumbling outside the door and she walked over, opening it. The apartment was dark but someone was mumbling and sounded frantic. Dean! He was dreaming as well. Or rather having a nightmare he had talked about.
Despite her promise not to come near him Lilly walked out. She knew the feeling of a nightmare after she had just woken up from one as well and she felt like she needed some company. She needed to feel alive because left to her own thoughts right now she would suffer a panic attack for sure. Taking care of Dean kept her busy. The thunders didn't seem to wake him up and during the lightning she could see him tossing and turning on the couch.
Slowly she walked closer to him and crouched down in front of him. He had to be in a bad place in his dream. The blanket that he had tossed over himself was crumpled at his feet, exposing his nude chest and black boxer shorts on strong legs.
"Dean." She said in a tiny voice and reached her hand out to touch his shoulder. She grabbed it gently and shook him. "Wake up you are having a nightmare Dean." She called out to him softly. Nothing.
"Dean? Come on, wake up." A new very loud thunder sounded outside and Dean's eyes opened.
Before Lilly could react one of his hands encircled her throat and he pushed her on the floor, straddling her and choking her with blank eyes. A new lightning illuminated his blue eyes in the strangest color. They were blazing like blue ice. Lilly started to panic but she remained clam underneath him because fighting him would get her nowhere. She reached out a hand to touch his cheek. "Jon…." She pressed out with the last breath inside her lungs and that name together with her touching his cheek so gently seemed to snap him out of it. His eyes cleared and he looked at her. The next instant he released his grip. "Shit." He rolled off of her and lay beside her on his back, his arm pulled over his eyes.
"I told you to stay the fuck away from me Lilly!" his voiced boomed louder than the thunder.
"I asked one thing of you! One! I could have killed you. What the hell?" He pushed himself to a sitting position and looked at her.
Lilly was trying to catch her breath. He had cut her air supply really good and she was wheezing right now. Her throat hurt her shoulder hurt but she looked him right into his eyes. Lighting struck again outside, showing them both their faces for an instant.
"Wanted…to…..help. Sorry." She pressed out.
"You are bloody stupid!" he told her angrily and ran a hand through his unruly hair.
"Maybe." She closed her eyes and a couple of tears ran down her cheeks. "Now I had two brushes with death today…" she joked with a hoarse voice and Dean cussed furiously beside her.
"I couldn't be alone. Had a bad dream myself. Thought I was dead for real. I want to feel alive. I need to know that I am not dead." She looked at him with wet eyes.
Dean had the strangest feeling in his gut. It felt like his intestines were in uproar. Like…fucking butterflies. He was furious at Lilly for breaking her promise. For putting him in this position where he had almost choked her to death. But at the same time he felt that need to connect as well. Adrenaline was still pumping through his veins and he knew the need to feel alive after a close call, he had faced it many times before. Usually he got drunk then or he searched for a whore to suck him off. Never to fuck. He couldn't handle the touching involved.
And now this beautiful blonde woman that reminded him so much of a doll lay there, bare legs, covered in just his shirt and a slip and she looked up at him with pleading eyes. Telling him she needed to feel alive. And involuntarily his body reacted to the silent plea.
Rated M for mature content
"Make me feel alive….Jon."
That did it for him. He was over her in a second and kissed her harshly. She wanted to feel alive? Oh she could have that. Because he wouldn't be gentle. He couldn't, not even with her. Plus he wanted to punish her for misbehaving, for breaking her promise to him about staying away. So he kissed her almost violently, bruising her lips, punishing her for her stupidity to wake him. And she took all the anger from him, welcomed it and put her hands in his hair and pulled at it, lowering one hand to his bare back where she scratched him with her nails. He hissed and bit her lip, gently, which made her moan.
He picked her up from the floor and leaned her over the couch and stepped behind her. "I won't be gentle doll." He warned her and she just shrugged. "Want to feel alive. Be rough."
He pushed her panties down and let her step out of them, then he pushed her shirt, well technically his shirt up over her breasts and fondled them for a little bit.
"When I fuck you, call me Jon." He growled and pushed his boxer shorts down to free his huge erection.
He didn't allow Lilly to turn around and take a look. One hand was firmly on her head, pushing it down, while the other guided his dick to her entrance. He pushed into her slowly, surprised that she was wet without much foreplay.
"Relax." He told her and stopped for a second to let her get used to his size. When he felt her muscles relax he pushed deeper into her until he was all the way in. They were a perfect fit it seemed. She was tight but his long dick fit into her all the way up to the hilt and he could fuck her without holding back. He grabbed a handful of hair and pulled her head back to kiss her.
"Ready?" he asked and she groaned. And he started to pump into her at a fast pace.
He fondled her clit when he felt her nearing her climax.
"Jon, please. Make me feel alive." She begged and that did it for him. He came and pushed her over the edge with him as well. "Jon…" she moaned and rode her orgasm out under him.
He pulled out of her after a while and cursed. "Tell me you are on the pill." He said and she turned around, pulling the shirt down over her exposed breasts. "I am on the pill." She told him and he raised an eyebrow. "I really am. Are you clean?"
He chuckled. "Yes, tested every three month. I have had no intercourse in a while, just some whore sucking me off. I am clean. You are as well I suppose."
"Yes, tested after my ex, the one with the shooting range thing, and didn't have anyone else in a while."
"Well, thank fuck." He pushed his hair out of his eyes. The thunder storm outside seemed to calm down.
Lilly took one of the last lightnings to admire Dean…Jon? In all his naked glory. "You are…well endowed." She said looking at his soft cock. He chuckled. "We fit well." He said and knew what was coming next.
"Jon…that is your name, right? It was the name that snapped you out of your dream."
He sighed and put on his boxer shorts. "Come on, let's find a more comfortable setting."
He pulled her up and went into the bedroom with her. They climbed onto the mattress and were not cuddling but lying close to each other. Dean…Jon? On his back and Lilly on her side watching him.
"My name is Jonathan. When I became a SEAL I changed it, became Dean Ambrose. I created that Alias to keep safe. You don't know what warlords pay for information about Marines, Seals, you name them. So everyone up in the elite, they create an Alias."
"Seth and Roman?" she asked and couldn't keep herself from extending her hand to caress his naked chest.
"Yes. But it's not my place to tell their names. We kept our army names in the business because they were good publicity among the right people, got us some deals. I grew up in Brooklyn…for a while…and I returned as an adult and people know me under my real name here. Jonathan Good. This is just one of my hide outs, one of my names. I have more. I am really paranoid."
"But this is the real you. This place." "The emptiness you mean? The signs of compulsive behavior? The PTSD you witnessed? Yeah, all me. I am broken Lilly, inside and out. I am a sick guy…Dean Ambrose can keep it together on the job, but Jon is the really crazy motherfucker. An empty shell. Everything broken inside. Nothing more to fix. And I brought you into this mess. Look, one night and I almost killed you."
"But you didn't. You say you have PTSD. Do you get treated?" "Nope. I don't let people in my head…ever. I get over this myself." "Sure, like all the other cases. You are still on active duty, right?" Now he looked at her. The whole time he had been staring blankly at the ceiling, it was easier not looking at her while telling her his secrets.
"That's classified." He was serious and Lilly just nodded. "So, yes. And you function out there but not here in private. Why?" He shrugged. "Maybe I am like a service dog. Put the collar on me and I work. Put it off and the brain switches to play mode. My play mode is just totally fucked up. Really Lilly. I am a hopeless case. Ask Dani or the Chief. They are right with everything they say about me. When this is over stay away. Far away."
But Lilly would not give in so easily. "That's why you treated me like shit whenever we ran into each other on the street. You liked me. That's why you call me doll. You think I am pretty like a Barbie doll."
He laughed softly. "You are fucking beautiful, that's why I call you doll. Something you admire from afar, but you do not play with ever because it is far too precious. You put it on a shelf and look at it. Never touch it because your dirty hands could taint the perfect little doll forever."
"That's how you see me? Dean…Jon….I am not a perfect little doll. I have flaws as well. And I am not scared to see the dark inside you. Because I know that deep in there is some light as well."
His blue eyes zeroed in on her. "Are you sure? Look, I just fucked you doggy style so I didn't have to look into your eyes. To treat you like a whore. With no intimacy. Lilly, there is no light left. Trust me. I don't say this to hurt you it is the honest to God truth. The way I live my life I will not see my 40th birthday. Hell maybe not even my 35th birthday in two years because I take the missions no one else does. The dangerous ones. The ones where the chances are high that you return in a casket. That's how I choose to live and I am fine with that."
Lilly shook her head. "What you are telling me is basically that you go out there on suicide missions, hoping to get killed because you don't have the guts to do it yourself?"
"No. I do have the guts. Trust me, that gun was in my mouth more times than I can count. But I want to do something good in my life when I bite the dust. Be proud I gave my life for something good. And I can make a difference until then. I would die happy if it would be for the right cause."
"You really would take a bullet for me, for nothing else but to do the right thing? Because as I said, I can't even pay you guys."
Jon sighed and put his hand on hers on his chest. "I would do it because I care for you doll."
"Then stop those missions. Stay alive. Do more good. Find another way. Try this …thing…between us."
He grabbed her hand and kissed it. "There is nothing between us doll. We had sex. Which is a natural reaction to the stress of the day. This need to feel alive. Perfectly common."
"Is it common as well that you fuck me when you made a wide breach around real sex for the longest time as you said yourself?"
"I will not deny my attraction towards you, but it doesn't change a thing. Me telling you about how fucked up I am…won't change a thing. The only reason I am even telling you this is because I don't want you to keep your hopes up for something that will never happen. You are not the person who brings a change to my life."
"We will see. Starting tonight. I will make show you what I can change for you. Sleep now Jon, I am here to keep your monsters away tonight. No, don't argue. You will not hurt me. I trust you. Trust me to keep the nightmares away."
Jon gave in because he was tired and he needed sleep. He encircled Lilly in his arms and surprisingly he drifted off to sleep only minutes later. Touching her felt surprinsingly…calming.